Lionslayer's Woman

by Nhys Glover

  ‘Won’t they have bought her already? Won’t you be buying her if you try to pass yourself off as a trader?’

  ‘Hmm, yes. Good point. I think they’ll look at ways around that. She might be considered a detained guest until she crosses into Parthia.’

  ‘They’d treat her better than as a slave then, wouldn’t they?’ she asked hopefully.

  Nexus smiled and reached up to stroke the side of her face. Why did he find himself doing such a thing every chance he got? It wasn’t for her, or not principally. It was he that gained pleasure from such a gesture. Her cheek was smooth and soft. It pleasured him to touch it. It pleasured him even more when she leaned in with such obvious enjoyment.

  His body began to respond to the contact and it shocked him so much that he pulled back, shifting his position so he faced away from her. What was happening? He shouldn’t feel aroused by such a simple gesture of affection. This was no whore with which to sate his lust. This was a vulnerable and innocent lady.

  ‘What?’ Her voice held hurt.

  ‘Nothing. A cramp in my back. Sleeping on these pallets leaves me aching like an old man. And the hard deck of the ship’s no better.’ He lied smoothly, as he reclined on his arm. ‘I think they’d treat her better than a slave. If they stick to the law then we’ll have to follow them over the border, and that could be dangerous. I might do better to leave you safely in Antiochia while I go on alone.’

  Her hand came down on his shoulder and his body responded to the touch. Damn, this was wrong, so wrong. Not just because she was an innocent, but also because she wasn’t Niobe. He’d betrayed Niobe once when she was alive, he wouldn’t do it again now that she was dead.

  He thought he heard a frustrated sigh but it didn’t seem to come from behind him. Turning his head, he looked into the corners of the small room, no, no spirits here. Then who or what had sighed? And, more importantly, why?

  ‘I won’t be left behind, Nexus, and I won’t make your task any harder than it is, I promise. But Mater will need to see me. She won’t believe you’ve come to help if I’m not there.’

  He nodded at the wisdom of her words, even though he wanted to deny them. ‘It won’t be pretty.’

  ‘I don’t expect it to be. I’ve seen slavers before. I lived on Rhodos, remember? It is a terrible institution and I wish I had the power to end it, but I can’t. All I can do is try to care for those slaves that come to me.’

  ‘Like Cyra.’

  ‘Like Cyra. I’ll free her after this. Even if she doesn’t get my sister back safely, I’ll free her. I would have done it sooner, but Pater didn’t want to be seen going against societal rules. Now it hardly matters. They killed him anyway, even though he never said one word against Caesar.’

  ‘Are you sure? Stoics are famous for their stand against Imperial rule.’

  ‘My father was always very careful to be seen to support the Emperor. He left Rome in ‘71 when Vespasian was banishing philosophers. He saw the writing on the wall, as it were, and took steps to be ahead of that decree. No, if Pater was on that list it was because Antoninus fabricated evidence against him to get to me. You see, I am a jinx. If Antoninus hadn’t wanted me, he would never have done such a thing. If I’d been less selfish, I would have married him and none of this would have happened.’

  He heard the tears in her voice and recognised the recriminations she piled on herself. Hadn’t he done just the same over his childhood friend, mother and Niobe? His heart went out to her and though he knew it was dangerous, he turned back to her and reached up to stroke her face again.

  ‘Galeria, you are not responsible for what this madman has done. Men want women and they sometimes do whatever it takes to get them. It’s never the fault of the woman, even though many men would blame their lack of control on them. You’re not a possession to be bought and sold to whichever man wants you. You’re not a slave.’

  Galeria’s eyes brimmed over with tears and he was reminded of storm clouds over the savannahs. ‘But was my freedom worth my father’s life? Or that of our slaves? And was it worth what’s been done to Mater and Galerianna?’

  ‘If you had known what was to happen then you might have chosen differently, but you didn’t. You couldn’t. None of us can know what results will come from the decisions we make. I couldn’t know my friend would die when we went after that lion. If I’d considered that possibility, I would have acted differently. But I didn’t know.’

  Even as he said those words his mind rebelled. That wasn’t true. He had to have known the consequences. He was a thoughtless, irresponsible child back then. Galeria’s situation was not the same at all.

  Was it?

  ‘Your friend died? How?’

  ‘We were barely men. Fourteen summers old. But we thought we were brave warriors. One night we went out after a lioness alone, thinking to bring back her skin and be declared heroes – men. Mugambo missed his throw and the lioness took him down. I managed to drive her away. But by then my friend was dead. I took him back to the village and left him there. Then I ran away. I blamed myself for his death and thought the village would blame me too. I only went home again recently, to face my accusers.’

  Galeria was silent for a few moments. When she did finally speak, it was with soft, considered words. ‘No, you couldn’t have known your friend would die. You’re right. We’d both have made different choices if we’d known, but we didn’t. Sometimes I wish we had a Delphic Oracle to call on when we have difficult decisions to make. If only we knew ahead of time…’

  He couldn’t help smiling at her frown as she considered what life would be like if they had that kind of foreknowledge. With the tip of his finger, he stroked the frown lines away.

  ‘Galeria, the world would be a very different place if that were possible. All we can do is what feels right in any given moment. Sometimes there is no absolute right way.’

  When she turned into him and kissed the inside of his arm with gratitude, his body reacted dramatically. He was hard and wanting in a second, and the tortured groan he let out was beyond him to control. His hand slid down to cup her face as his thumb stroked her full bottom lip. He didn’t think of her as plain or beautiful now, she was just Galeria, and in that moment, he wanted her so badly he trembled.

  Her lips parted to allow his thumb entry. It was such an innocent gesture. She had no idea what it signified, or how he would imagine it was another part of him seeking entry into her body. Her warm wet mouth was so similar to another part of her that might welcome him.

  Shuddering with desire, he drew her closer. Even while his brain screamed at him not to do this thing, his body had other ideas. Galeria came willingly, and tasting her lips for the first time, he realised how innocent she truly was. Had any male ever kissed her before? Her tentative response told him no.

  That kiss reminded him of another. One he’d given the innocent Livia so she could see that kissing was not a bad thing. He’d pulled away from her back then, not wanting to take from her what belonged to another. In doing so, he’d inadvertently led to her rape. Another situation where foreknowledge would have meant a totally different action.

  But Galeria wasn’t Livia. Her mind wasn’t twisted by the teachings of a madman father. Galeria was innocent from choice. Yet, here she was choosing to be with him.

  No, she didn’t know what she was doing. To her it was simply a kiss. She didn’t know the urges she’d aroused in him.

  Oh, but how her innocence called to him. Her lips took their lead from his, opening to kiss first one lip and then the other, like butterflies dancing so tenderly. He breathed in the clean pleasing scent of her that matched her taste. Not richly exotic like Niobe, not fragile and ethereal like Livia, but clean, pure and sensible. Who would ever think that sensible could be erotic?

  Before he could think better of it, he used his tongue to lap at her top lip. The little start told him this was something she hadn’t expected or experienced before, but she didn’t draw back. Instead, she opened he
r mouth a little more, giving him permission to go further. He did, groaning with pent desire as he gently explored her warm, wet mouth. His arousal pulsed against the restraints of his loincloth.

  When she moaned and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, he was lost. With one swift movement, he had her beneath him on the pallet, his body pressed against the full length of her slim form.

  His hand found her breast and kneaded it, delighting in the ripe flesh with its aroused nipple. He wanted that arousal in his mouth. He wanted her hot wet centre in his mouth. He wanted to taste her everywhere. The fever was building. This was insanity. She was a patrician, a virgin. He was a freed slave whose soul belonged to another. He couldn’t do this!

  With a guttural profanity, he dragged himself away from her and collapsed onto his side of the bed. Dragging in gasps of air, he tried to bring his body under control. This wasn’t right. This girl was his to protect, not to ravage. She didn’t know what she was doing when she gave to him so freely. He could never give her what she deserved… what she wanted, whether she knew it or not. He couldn’t love her.

  Galeria lay panting beside the man who, moments before, had been arousing her body in ways that she could never have expected. How could she have acted in such an uncontrollable way? It was as if her body weren’t her own. Even while her brain was telling her that letting Nexus kiss and touch her in that way was dangerous, her body had overruled her. She’d been caught up in the whirlpool of desire, and she hadn’t wanted him to stop.

  Was this what Cyra had told her about? Was this the pleasure that awaited her with a man? If so, it was far better than she could ever have imagined. And yet, hadn’t Cyra warned her against Nexus? Hadn’t she said he was a man without a soul? And, hadn’t she found out just why that was, today? He was still in love with his Niobe. No one would ever compare with her. If he wanted Galeria, it was against his will. His body had taken over just as hers had. He would feel guilty now for betraying Niobe’s memory. That was why he’d stopped.

  She tried to drive the memory of his kisses from her mind, but the more she tried, the more imbedded they became. That moment when she’d known what he was going to do. The way his thumb had stroked her lip, seeking entrance. Taking his thumb into her mouth was the most erotic thing she’d ever done, and he had tasted so good. His hands, just as the rest of his person, were always clean. His fingernails were always cut short and kept free of dirt, his hair cropped tightly to his scalp, his tunic changed every day. He was impeccable, and that was how his finger had tasted… impeccably clean and… male.

  When he’d drawn her down to kiss her, she had gone eagerly. This was what she’d wanted from him from almost the first moment she’d seen him. The dark god, the rock to which she could cling, as the world raced out of control around her. Back then, she hadn’t known how close to crumbling that rock was, but even knowing it now, she didn’t regret those kisses. They moved her in ways she couldn’t have imagined, and her body had wept for him.

  His body had wanted her as desperately as she’d wanted him, but she wasn’t naive enough to think that meant anything. It was his body that wanted her, not him. He belonged to Niobe; would always belong to a dead woman with whom she couldn’t compete. Even alive, Galeria couldn’t have been able to compete with her. She wasn’t beautiful or desirable as Niobe would have been. All Galeria was to Nexus was an available female body. They were sharing close quarters, so of course it would be arousing – it wasn’t her he really wanted.

  Blinking back the tears, she shuffled over onto the mattress as far from him as she could get. She needed to sleep. Tomorrow they’d arrive in Seleukeia Pieria. Her mother might already be there. Maybe tomorrow she would see her again, and she would tell her how sorry she was for not being the daughter she wanted. She’d tell her that if she’d taken her mother’s advice, none of this would have happened. It was all her fault. All of this was her fault.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  13 June 82 CE, Isthmia, ACHAIA

  Cyra could barely control her excitement as the harbour of Isthmia came into sight just after midday. It felt like they’d been sailing toward this destination for months. So much had happened. Yet, it was only a little more than a week ago that the upheaval had occurred. Only a little more than a week since her life had changed course so shockingly and irrevocably again.

  She looked at Leonis, who stood beside her on the deck in the place that had become theirs during the journey. Now he’d put his arm around her shoulder, as if it were second nature to do so, and she would accept the gesture of affection and ownership, as if it were second nature for her to do so, too. But, even though they had made love in the most complete way possible, she still wasn’t sure how she felt about him.

  Certainly she liked him and found him attractive; that was a given. And she was grateful for the way he accepted her mutilated body. That he saw her disfigurement as battle scars worthy of respect gave her pride in herself again. She no longer felt like a victim, a weak woman brutalised and helpless. To Leonis, her injuries had been incurred because she stood up to her enemy, just as any warrior would. That made her an Amazon.

  So, yes, she was grateful to him for giving her back her self-respect and making her feel beautiful when she was anything but. Yet that wasn’t enough reason to commit to him body and soul, even if he had wanted her to. After all, it was he who’d said they’d be together as long as they both gained pleasure from it. He’d never suggested that he wanted more from her than that.

  And even if he did, what was the possibility of something more? She belonged to Galeria and would go wherever she went. Leonis belonged to Livianna Honoraria and would probably have to return to Rome when he finished this task. She doubted Galeria would want to live in Rome, not after what Caesar had done to her family. In fact, Galeria might need to spend her life in hiding, in case Domitian came after her, too, for what she knew.

  So, she and Leonis had no future, even if she wanted one, even if he wanted one. And if that made her chest hurt, then it was only to be expected. Losing the kind of sexual pleasure they’d shared would be hard. It was as she’d explained to Galeria: Sex was like food, and now that she’d eaten a gourmet feast, it would be hard to go back to bread and water again.

  ‘Not long now. I’ll check with the Harbour Master as soon as we arrive,’ Leonis said, dragging her back to the present and their more important concerns.

  Cyra nodded.

  ‘Keep that girl quiet!’ Antoninus snapped irritably as the nurse he’d bought led Galeria Minor up onto the deck. The girl began to whimper the moment the bright light hit her eyes.

  Cooing softly, the middle-aged woman of Nubian blood quieted the child down. Antoninus was proud of his quick thinking where the woman was concerned. She might have cost him a fortune but it had proved worth it. The woman was a natural with children and was quickly able to sooth the Donicus child so that she no longer screamed her head off every waking moment. The woman had even managed to get the girl to eat and drink, but she still had to administer the concoction of poppy seeds to get the child to sleep. She suffered terrible nightmares and the first night she’d slept without being drugged, she’d kept the whole inn awake with her screams.

  It had been an interminable journey so far. The only vessel he’d been able to book passage on for the four of them, with a small box size room below deck for the child and slave, was a small island-hopper that traversed the seas during daylight hours only. Their nights had been spent in expensive inns along the way. He’d have to get a room for the child and slave, and leave Xerxes to sleep on the floor outside the room. For himself, he’d been forced to share space in the men’s dormitory, or where no such space was available, the taproom floor. Thank the gods for the straw pallet Xerxes carried for him. Without it, he wouldn’t have had a moment’s rest.

  He hated travelling at the best of times, but this was anything but the best of times. He was constantly having to explain the terrified girl to other travellers. The story
he’d concocted was a good one: She was a cousin of his whose family had been murdered in front of her. Of course, the child was traumatised. It only stood to reason that she would be scared of any man, even her cousin, after what she’d seen. No, don’t try to talk to her. It only served to aggravate her further. He was taking her to Rome. His father knew the best medici who might be able to do something for the poor child. Yes, he was putting himself out greatly for her, but what else was a good cousin to do? It was his familial duty after all.

  One lie rolled into another until it almost felt like the truth to him now. And, of course, once he married Galeria this little girl would become part of his family. With no living male as paterfamilias, the child would come under his father’s protection once Galeria and he were married. They would live in Rome, if that were where his father remained, or maybe in Ostia, which was smaller and benefited from the sea breezes.

  But there was plenty of time for sorting out such matters once he had Galeria beside him. He wondered how long it would take her to catch him up. It may have been a mistake to leave so hurriedly from Ephesus. It was one thing to expect a distraught young woman to travel two days from her home alone, it was another to expect her to cross half the width of the empire. Highborn women didn’t travel alone. Would she have money enough to buy a slave protector?

  He should have considered such things before leaving so hastily. After all, she was only a woman. How could she be expected to work out the intricacies of travel? Especially as she’d be traumatised by what had happened to her family and household. Maybe he should wait a few days here in Isthmia so she could catch him up. Then they could all travel on to Rome together.