The Resolution for Men

by Stephen Kendrick

  Following Christ is counter-cultural. Most people won’t encourage you to take stands that step on people’s toes or upset the status quo. Fellow believers may even be offended if they see your position as being too radical or your cause too controversial. But in a world where people are passive and lenient in their opinions, swayed by prevailing agendas, tolerant toward sinful permissiveness, and consumed by selfish desires, you shouldn’t expect much company when you choose to confront evil or care about the unlovely.

  Yet whether it’s acceptable to our tastes or not, men are called by God to love the world (the people for whom Christ died) in the way He loves it, and to hate the world (its sin and rebellion against Him) in the way He hates it. “Whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God” (James 4:4).

  “To act justly.”

  “To love mercy.”

  “To walk humbly.”

  To be courageous. We are to do this not only when it’s convenient but also when it’s costly. Not for others’ approval but for the affirming “well done” of God’s approval. Paul defended his own boldness in ministry by asking, “Am I now trying to win the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10 NIV).

  We have an obligation before God to leave for future generations a society that is not riddled with injustice and immorality. This starts in our homes, where we set godly standards and shepherd our children underneath them. It extends to our churches, where we must avoid caving to the popular myth that the best way to reach the world is to become more like the world. Then our fight must go into other areas where public opinions are being shaped and cultural norms defined. Many Christians recognize that the ultimate solutions to our nation’s problems are not political and judicial. But that’s no excuse for being disengaged and passive in these arenas. Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Morality cannot be legislated, but behavior can be regulated. Judicial decrees may not change the heart, but they can restrain the heartless.”14

  We can influence people, including nonbelievers, on matters of justice and human decency. In the process we can tell them about Christ and show them the full implications of Christian truth and compassion.

  Court decisions are gradually eroding religious liberties, usually with very little objection from God’s people. Wherever Christians fail to stand up for what is right, our children and grandchildren will one day pay the painful price.

  Will our grandchildren look back and wonder why we looked away and did nothing while rights were freely taken from us that men in past generations fought and died for? Will they be ashamed of our failure to stand up and speak out? These are legitimate questions. But they pale in comparison to the larger question: How will Christ evaluate our actions when we stand before Him at the judgment seat? (Romans 14:10–12; 1 Corinthians 3:12–15; 2 Corinthians 5:10).

  A wise quotation attributed to Martin Luther expresses well a challenge for pastors and all Christian men:

  If I profess with the loudest voice and clearest exposition every portion of the truth of God except precisely that point which the world and the devil are at that moment attacking, I am not confessing Christ. Where the battle rages, there the loyalty of the soldier is proven, and to be steady on all the battle fronts besides is mere flight and disgrace if he flinches at that point.

  If you’re only going to fight the battle in one place, fight it in your heart; if in two places, fight it in your heart and in your home. But realize you are also a steward of your church, community, city, state, and country.

  We’re at war—a spiritual battle against unseen but very real enemies. “We are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places” (Ephesians 6:12 NLT). There is no end to the evil and destruction they will lead people into if not resisted. With this in mind, we should adopt godly lifestyles and make sacrifices so we may win the war. “Greater is He who is in you [Christ] than he who is in the world [the Devil]” (1 John 4:4).

  We are called as men to resist the devil wherever he seeks to destroy lives, steal human dignity, or suppress the cause of righteousness on earth. We can’t do everything, but we can probably do much more than we’re currently doing—not to make a name for ourselves but to magnify the name of Christ in our world.

  “I Will Love Mercy”

  In the Great Commission—Christ’s parting words to His followers before He returned to heaven—Jesus not only told His disciples to evangelize, He also told them to teach new converts “to observe all that I have commanded you” (Matthew 28:20). And among the many things Jesus “commanded” of us is the priority of being compassionate and taking sacrificial action for the weak and needy. If we fail to do this, we fail to fulfill the Great Commission.

  Loving God cannot be separated from loving our neighbor (Matthew 22:34–40). When responding to a man who wished to define “neighbor” in a way that excluded certain groups of people, Christ presented the Good Samaritan as a model for what our behavior should look like (Luke 10:25–37), a man who went out of his way to help a victim lying in the ditch. The religious hypocrites looked the other way because they had more “spiritual” things to do.

  Helping the poor has always set Christians apart, showing the world that we operate on a radically different value system. Sometimes it seems the church’s highest value is what Francis Schaeffer called “personal peace and affluence.” We want to be rich, comfortable, and at ease. We want to be accepted. We don’t want to be inconvenienced or controversial. Above all, we don’t want to suffer. But again and again, God’s Word exhorts us:

  Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked. (Psalm 82:3–4 NIV)

  Feed the hungry and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out from the darkness, and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon. (Isaiah 58:10 NLT)

  It is time for Christian men to stand up and do what is right, regardless of the cost or the change of plans in our lifestyle. This doesn’t mean feeling guilty that God has entrusted us with abundance. We should be grateful to Him for that. But we should also feel very responsible to use the abundance He has given to help the less fortunate around us.

  It’s the courageous, compassionate, Christlike thing to do.

  We should ask ourselves, “If Christ were on the other side of the street, or the city, or even the world, and He were hungry, thirsty, helpless, abused, or imprisoned for His faith, would we care enough to go help Him?” For we must not forget what Christ Himself said in Matthew 25:40. What we do to help the least of these our brothers, we do for Him. He is in our neighborhood, community, city, and country. He is everywhere in the world, awaiting the ministry of His people to the needy and persecuted people of our day. We are His hands and feet.

  Will our children and grandchildren see us fulfilling this part of our Resolution calling? Will we show them that true success—the real pursuit of true lovers of God—is marked by extending that same love to the hurting, disenfranchised, lonely, and forgotten around us?

  All for Jesus

  There are many people in our world—not just Christians—who stand up against injustice. But believers in Christ have the greatest reason and motivation of all for confronting evil and extending mercy. Our purpose in fighting the good fight in our generation is to glorify the name of Christ, to serve others for His fame and renown. And because this is His desire, He promises the empowerment of His Spirit to help us persevere through the battle—no matter how hard, no matter how disrespected, no matter how far-reaching and sacrificial.

  If Martin Luther King Jr., William Wilberforce, John Wesley, John the Baptist, or Dietrich Bonhoeffer were alive today, would they see the same injustices and evils we see and run ahead of us into battle
? If they did, would we join them, or perhaps even race ahead of them? Or would we watch like cowards from behind the tall grass?

  If our lives are centered on being against abortion, pornography, homosexuality, or sex trafficking—any single issue like that isn’t enough. Certainly we should hate abuse in all its forms. God calls upon us to defend the poor and needy. But some people hate evil more than they love good. While love strengthens us for the long haul, hatred has a way of embittering us and burning us out. That should not be our drive! Paul said, “The love of Christ compels us” (2 Corinthians 5:14 NKJV).

  To endure in a cause, we must make sure it’s really about Jesus and His kingdom, and then keep reminding ourselves of His words: “Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me” (Matthew 25:40). We need to lovingly reach out to those blinded and bound by evil. We are to follow Christ from start to finish.

  If you wish to persevere, yield to the Holy Spirit and ask God to empower you. Then start moving your feet. Don’t be shocked by opposition; be prepared for it. Many of us have forgotten what our forefathers knew—that adversity and persecution is normal for Christians. So sharpen your sword and prepare for the long march.

  Charles Spurgeon, a nineteenth century British pastor who stood steadfastly against the evils of his day, said:

  Fearless of all consequences, you must do the right. You will need the courage of a lion unhesitatingly to pursue a course which shall turn your best friend into your fiercest foe; but for the love of Jesus you must thus be courageous. For the truth’s sake, to hazard reputation and affection is such a deed that to do it constantly you will need a degree of moral principle which only the Spirit of God can work in you; yet turn not your back like a coward, but play the man. Follow right manfully in your Master’s steps, for he has traversed this rough way before you.15

  God can use our courageous acts of justice and mercy to change people one at a time—and to change our families one generation at a time. When we lock shields and work together to pray fearlessly, to live the truth in love, to resist evil, to boldly speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, we shine as lights in our darkened world. Many will not welcome our message, but many will. Let’s not allow those who refuse the truth to stop us from proclaiming it to those who will be set free by it, because we know God will change our character and that of our children through our faithfulness to Him.

  Jesus will be clearly seen and proclaimed. The gospel will shine forth like the dawn.

  And our strong Father will be well pleased.

  COURAGEOUS CHALLENGE

  Contact your local police department or youth detention center and ask them what the biggest concerns are in your city. Then pray for God to raise up strong men to help confront those specific issues.

  MEMORY VERSE

  He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8 NIV)

  As those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

  Colossians 3:12

  CHAPTER 10

  RESOLVE TO DEMONSTRATE LOVE

  I WILL pray for others and treat them with kindness, respect, and compassion.

  Truth and justice must always be balanced out with love, kindness, and compassion. But a lot of us men think of love and kindness as a women’s sport. Sure, we generally get past some of our inhibitions and are able to hug people on occasion—as long as it’s short and doesn’t call our manhood into question. We may not mind being tender at home with our families when no one else is watching. But the burden of being overly kind, or thoughtful and sensitive to others’ needs, or called upon to offer comfort to someone—we freely delegate those jobs to our wives or mothers. Love is just not known as our strong suit.

  We’ve got better things to do than worry about your feelings. You’ll get over it.

  In contrast, what most men don’t realize about love is that the strongest, manliest man of all time was also the most loving Man ever to walk the earth. Jesus Christ, the greatest Warrior for justice, went out of His way to show kindness, compassion, and respect to people from all walks of life. He reached out to the lowly fishermen as well as the prideful tax collectors. He spent time teaching the ignorant, ministering to diseased beggars, and giving His full attention to “irritating” children. He ate with sinners who disagreed with His teaching and who probably assumed He was a little deluded. There was no one He didn’t treat properly, even when He rebuked the Pharisees with harsh truth that embarrassed them. He knew when to show both tender love and tough love, both to His friends and His enemies, but it was love just the same. He knew when to encourage His disciples and when to reprimand them. He died for all, not just those who loved Him. He was the perfect example of living a life of selfless love toward others. And He is our model to follow.

  So for men who know they’re a little deficient in the love department, but who realize they suffer from relationships that are shallow, disloyal, or sometimes awkward and uncomfortable, Christian love is the answer that can enrich their lives with greater meaning and purpose. We should never shy away from what is considered the most powerful motivation of all. Love is like rocket fuel that emboldens a man to serve his family, sacrifice for his neighbor, and lay down his life for a friend. It makes us turn from our naturally selfish bent and become increasingly more kind and compassionate.

  But how do we develop a deeper capacity for kindness and compassion? Where do we start in our demonstration of it?

  Well, the practice of prayer is the perfect place where love for others can really begin.

  “I Will Pray for Others”

  Most Christian men would probably admit they don’t pray enough. Unless there’s a crisis or an important issue at hand, many would say that their prayers are limited to mealtimes, bedtime, and silently during church services—if that! But this weak record is not the mark of a courageous follower of Christ, a man challenged by God’s call to love his neighbor as himself.

  Only in Christ do we find the wisdom, strength, and motivation to accomplish what God has given us to do. Our kindness, respect, and compassion will never be driven by any natural, inborn tendencies of ours—not consistently. Until we devote ourselves to spending time with God in prayer, we will never get past the distractions of our day or the limitations in our love tank.

  Prayer is our lifeline to spiritual health. To a man in need of God, it becomes as necessary as breathing. Inside the freedom of prayer, you can open up with God about your marriage and family issues, your friends and their needs, even your enemies and your responses to them. If it is worth worrying about, it is worth praying about.

  Prayer can open your mind and tune you into what truly matters to God and the needs of the people around you. As you pray, God can change your heart and improve the way you think and relate to others and their needs each day.

  So “pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests” (Ephesians 6:18 NIV). If you don’t respect your pastor and want a better one, start praying for the one you already have. Pray “that God may open a door for [their] message, so that [they] may proclaim the mystery of Christ” (Colossians 4:3 NIV). If you don’t feel much more than a passing wave of compassion for people who are suffering through hard times, then start praying for those who are “in trouble” or “sick” (James 5:13–14 NIV).

  Committing to prayer is vitally important. You need it. God wants it. And it is a foolish man who chooses not to utilize it as a weapon in the battles of life—praying on his own behalf as well as others’.

  But sometimes when we pray, we get no response—which can get frustrating. We start wondering if prayer works or God cares. So we quit praying and go back to trying to figure out life the best we can in our own strength.

  But the Bible reveals that not only does prayer
powerfully work, we must learn how to work prayer. There are some specific things that may be locking up your prayers and making the whole experience ineffective—things you can diagnose and deal with—as well as some important keys to transforming prayer into a daily, ongoing adventure with God.

  Here they are:

  THE TEN LOCKS THAT MAKE OUR PRAYERS INEFFECTIVE

  1. Praying without knowing God through faith in Christ. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me” (John 14:6). If a man hasn’t been saved and surrendered to Christ as Lord, he has no mediator between himself and God and is unwelcome in the holy of holies (1 Timothy 2:5).

  2. Praying with an unrepentant heart. The psalmist realized, “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the LORD would not have listened; but God has surely listened and heard my voice in prayer” (Psalm 66:18–19 NIV). Clinging to sin and stiff-arming God makes God stiff-arm us. If you hold on to sin and refuse to confess it, you cannot take full hold on God.

  3. Praying for show. “When you pray,” Jesus taught, “you are not to be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on the street corners so that they may be seen by men. Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full” (Matthew 6:5). Prayers can be made in public, but only sincere hearts connect with God.