by Ashley Love
But if this thing between them ended when he went back to work she wouldn't have any reason to feel rejected. Their brief time together could just be a pleasant memory; one they could hopefully both look back on and smile about.
He cringed, reminded of Aaron talking about a natural break, but in this case maybe it was applicable. At the end of this week they'd both go back to their lives and, he flattered himself to think, maybe she'd get more out of sex in the future.
With someone else.
If he noticed the grimace on his face at that thought, he ignored it. He focused instead on what was to come that night. His decision was made and he wasn't going to feel guilty about it any longer. In fact, he was pretty damned excited about it.
If someone had asked him, he couldn't have told them why she'd gotten under his skin like this. She was just so different from what he was used to. The last few years he tended to go for older women. Women who were more often than not more experienced than him sexually and who, like him, weren't interested in emotional attachments beyond friendship.
It was an arrangement that had served him well and one that he had no regrets about. Not only had he learned a lot about how to make a girl happy both in bed and out, he enjoyed the relaxed ease that came with a complete lack of responsibility for their emotional well-being.
Well, not a complete lack. Most of the women he dated were friends so he did care about them to varying degrees. If they were upset he offered comfort and when they needed someone to help them change the oil in their car or fix a leaky sink he never hesitated. But he didn't have the weight of worrying that a stray glance at someone else's cleavage, a badly-timed smart ass comment, or a few unreturned calls were going to lead to tears and accusations.
Not only that, he didn't have to worry about who was going to get hurt when the shine wore off, which he knew it inevitably would. If either of them met someone else they were interested in, it wasn't a problem. If either of them got bored, they moved on. No hard feelings.
With Cassie it was like he had that same relaxed ease with her because he didn't have to think so hard about taking her feelings into account. He just did it instinctively. Maybe it was because he'd known her for so long. That's what he told himself, anyway. After thinking of her for so long as a little sister it was just second nature to care about her; to be protective of her.
And damn, she was hot. There was something about her combination of shy hesitance and adventurous curiosity that really drove him crazy. He certainly enjoyed being with girls who knew exactly what they were doing in bed and it was always gratifying to know he satisfied them, but this was something different altogether.
The way her body responded so strongly to his touch, his voice, his body; knowing he was the only one that could make her feel that way...it was a powerful rush. And the way she opened up to him, trusted him, let him see parts of her she'd never shared with anyone else; it made him feel...well, something he didn't quite have words for.
6
I was way too excited about going over to Jax's house that night, but I couldn't help it. The idea of having the whole evening to ourselves, taking our time, not worrying about who might see or hear us, was enough to have me whimpering in anticipation. God, my insides turned to jelly just thinking about the things he did to me. I had no idea it could be like that and we weren't even having sex.
Of course it hadn't taken long for me to change my mind about that rule. The first night, in fact, I'd realized I was going to have to break it. I didn't say anything because there was just something embarrassing about giving in so soon, but if he could make me feel that good with just his fingers and his mouth, I wanted...no, I needed to know what sex with him would be like. Unfortunately we hadn't had much of a chance to be alone together since then, so I hadn't told him. Yet.
My face got hot just thinking about it, but he'd made it clear he wanted me to tell him what I wanted so I was going to tell him and I wasn't going to act all embarrassed about it when I did. I'd just have to fake the confidence I didn't feel. It was actually pretty easy to pretend not to be shy with him, since nothing I did seemed to shock or disturb him. In fact, he seemed to get off on the things that would normally embarrass me most.
I'd never been so mortified and aroused at the same time as I was earlier when he asked me to go to my room and...well. Doing something like that in the broad daylight, knowing he was sitting in the next room perfectly aware of what I was doing...God, just thinking about it had me blushing painfully. But I'd never made myself feel so good before, reaching for those heights I knew now I could get to, and moaning his name over and over into a pillow I pressed to my face to keep quiet.
And then the way he looked at me afterward when I pressed that third finger to his lips nearly drove me right back over the edge again. He looked surprised, impressed...so incredibly turned on I thought he might push me up against the wall and just screw me right there on the spot. I giggled to myself at the thought that I might have let him, even with Aaron ten feet away through an open door.
That was the other thing that gave me the courage to tell him. He so clearly wanted it, too. I could see it in his eyes every time he looked at me. And tonight was our chance. I shivered in nervous anticipation and wondered what on earth I was going to do with myself in the hours until it was time to leave.
I was a confused mix of nerves and excitement when I showed up at his house later that night. The expression on Jax's face when he answered the door was enough to make my mind go blank; the confident smirk and dark look in his eyes telling me that he was just as excited as I was to have me all to himself. He hooked a finger in the waistband of my jeans and pulled me into the house as he pushed the door closed.
"I'm gonna make you scream," he said, his voice so low and full of promise that I shivered in his arms and completely forgot my carefully planned out script.
He had done it, too. He teased me for ages, kissing me all over my body as he slowly undressed me, then proceeded to bring me to the edge of climax over and over, ignoring first my pleas then my curses when he left me hanging every time.
Finally, with my body strung so tight it felt like a bow string about to snap, he pushed me over the edge and sent me hurtling into a mind-blowing orgasm. It felt like it went on forever with his mouth never letting up and his fingers deep inside me, pushing me back up every time I started to come down.
My throat was hoarse by the time I caught my breath, so despite the fact that I didn't remember screaming, I believed him when he chuckled and arrogantly whispered, "Told ya" in my ear.
It was amazing, but it only solidified my desire for more. As I drifted down from the heights all I could think about was wrapping my legs around his hips and feeling him sink deep inside me. My breath came short again at the mere thought of it and before I even realized what I was doing I spoke.
"Jax, I want you."
"I'm right here, babe," he said with a laugh as he brushed his lips along my collarbone.
"No, I mean...I want you." My hand found his erection through his pants and traveled the length of it, his sharp hiss of breath bringing a smile to my face. It was such an incredible thrill to know I could affect him like that. "Inside me. Right now."
He blinked at me in surprise and the expression on his face would have made me giggle if my naked body hadn't been so tightly pressed against him.
"What about—"
"Fuck the rules." I pushed him onto his back and straddled his thighs, trailing my fingernails lightly down his chest and stomach until I got to the waistband of his jeans. He made a rumbling noise in his throat and his eyes drifted shut. "I made them. I can break them."
I leaned down to kiss his neck as I undid the button and zipper and pushed his jeans down over his hips. With my heart beating in my throat I moved to position myself over him, but at the last second he grabbed my hips and pushed them away.
"Hold on now, let's stop and think about this. Are you sure that's what you really wa...ooooh, fuc
k."
His head fell back and his fingers dug into the bedspread as I bent down and sealed my lips around the head of his dick, sucking hard. I swirled my tongue around the tip a few times before sinking lower, tugging his jeans further down as I took him deeper into her mouth.
The noises he made were encouraging so I continued, bobbing my head up and down his shaft, sucking and licking in what I hoped was a pleasurable way. I'd done this plenty of times, but never really felt like I knew what I was doing. None of the guys had ever complained, but none of them said I was particularly good at it either, or told me what they liked or didn't like about it. Most of what I knew came from listening to Kayla and Blaire talk.
After a couple of minutes I lifted my head, letting him slip from my mouth, but kept stroking him with my hand.
"Fuck, Cassie, don't stop, baby."
A shiver shot down my spine. I loved it when he called me Cassie.
"I know what I want, Jax. What do you want?"
His only response was a long, low groan. I maintained a slow, steady rhythm, a sly smile stealing across my face when his hips started thrusting up to meet my hand.
"Do you want me?" I whispered, surprised at how husky my voice was. Apparently I could pull off this confidence thing pretty well; I sounded downright seductive even to my own ears.
His eyes opened into slits as he looked up at me. "Do you really need to ask me that with my dick about to explode in your face?"
The smile faltered the tiniest bit on my face. "You just stopped me from fucking you."
Before I knew what was happening Jax grabbed my wrists and pulled me up so I was stretched out on top of him. His hips flexed and we both moaned at the feeling of his shaft sliding along my wet folds.
"Ask me that question again," he whispered, running his hand down my back to press against my ass, pushing me tighter against him as he lifted his hips again.
I couldn't hold back the loud moan. It almost felt like he was inside me, he was so hot and hard against my sensitive flesh.
"Ask me," he demanded, his fingers digging into my ass, holding me tight to him.
"Do you want me?" This time it came out more breathy and pleading, but I hardly noticed given what he said next.
"Babe, I want to roll you over right this second, bury my dick inside you, and fuck you so hard you can't walk tomorrow." His voice was strained and he had a pained expression on his face as he sat up with me in his lap. "But I don't think either of us should make that decision in the heat of the moment."
"I'm not. I've thought about it," I assured him. His messy brown hair was hanging in his face and I couldn't help running my fingertips through it to smooth it back. He looked up and locked eyes with me.
"Have you?"
"Yes."
"Did you bring condoms?"
I looked at him blankly for a moment and realized that he was right. I hadn't really thought it through in that sense at all. Condoms had never occurred to me, but he didn't know that and his condescending tone pissed me off.
"I assumed you would have condoms stashed somewhere in your lair here." I gestured at his old bedroom, still decorated like it had been in high school with Bruce Lee posters and pictures of half-naked women covering the walls.
"And you suddenly decided you're not worried about all the other strings that come with sex? The...less practical ones?"
"No, I'm not."
His eyes narrowed and he stared searchingly at me for a moment before he took my face between his hands. My heart pounded as he slowly moved in, pressing a kiss to the corner of my mouth, not quite touching my lips. He did it again on the other side, but this time he darted his tongue against my skin, sending goose bumps scattering down my neck.
I was barely breathing. His nose brushed softly against mine and I could feel his breath across my own parted lips. My heart pounded loud in my ears as I waited for his kiss.
It didn't come.
I opened my eyes to see his a few scant inches away, deep brown and staring into mine with an intensity that made my heart stop. I was a second away from closing the distance between us when my self-preservation kicked in.
I couldn't. I'd be totally lost if I kissed him; my fragile sense of detachment completely shattered. That was why I'd made that rule in the first place. My head dropped and I looked away with a sigh. His fingertips brushed my cheek and I looked up at him.
"Think about it some more."
"It's not like we have a lot of time. Don't you go back to work in a few days?"
"Yeah, on the second. Still, we have time to think it through. What about New Year's Eve? That'd give us a couple of days and if we both still want to we could do it then."
"We're having a party that night."
"I know, Aaron told me. It's perfect; no one will be paying attention to us and it won't be weird if I'm still there in the morning."
"Alright," I said, perking up a bit at his apparent acquiescence.
"Just one condition."
"Which is..."
"I can't sleep with someone who's afraid to kiss me."
There was a long pause while his words sunk in. When I didn't answer he touched my cheek again, trying to lift my face to his, but I wouldn't let him.
"Cassie, if this is—"
"Don't. Please."
Whatever it was he was about to say, I didn't want to go anywhere near that conversation. So far I'd been relatively successful at keeping things light and fun, but that required some strict self-discipline when it came to not thinking or talking about how I felt about him. I especially didn't want to talk about it with him.
At the moment I didn't even want to look at him, afraid that if I did I'd see guilt in his eyes. Or worse...pity. My fleeing eyes landed on his dick, still hard but definitely deflating, and the corners of my mouth twitched up in a little smile.
"Okay," I said, reaching down between us to take him in hand again. The feel of my own wetness still on his shaft was enough to make me moan with him as I spread the slickness around and used it to speed my movements. "New Year's Eve. I'll meet you at midnight."
I let my thumb slowly circle the head before stroking his length and it swelled back to life in my hand. When I finally looked up at him his eyes were closed, his mouth parted as he exhaled shakily.
"Are you sure you want to wait?" I asked with a mischievous grin.
He fell back on the bed with a reluctant groan. "Yes. Now I'm begging you, do me a solid and finish what you started."
I grinned as I continued to stroke him. "I'm not sure what you're referring to, you'll have to be more specific."
The dark look he gave me sent shivers down my spine. He lifted his body just enough to wrap his hand around the back of my head and gently pushed me down until my lips were resting against the swollen tip of his dick.
"I want you to suck on my dick until I cum in your mouth," he said in a quiet voice. "Is that specific enough for you?"
The rush of heat that flooded through my body shocked me more than his words and I nodded slowly, letting my lips brush gently over the silky skin. Jax made a noise deep in his throat and pressed harder on the back of my head. I let him push my head down, taking him deep into my mouth.
I could taste the salty liquid leaking out and used my tongue to spread it around. I'd never let anyone cum in my mouth before, but then no one had ever asked me to. Another low moan from Jax as I sucked hard and swirled my tongue against him had me convinced. He'd done things for me I didn't even know were possible and, until now, hadn't really asked for much in return. I wanted to do this for him.
With renewed determination I tried everything I could think of to please him. I knew he liked it when I squeezed him tight so I held on to the base of his dick with an iron fist, pumping in time with my bobbing head. I noticed his cock jumped in my hand when my tongue hit the little hole at the tip so I gave that some attention as well. But I got the best reaction when I let him go deep, almost far enough to make me gag. His back arched up a
nd his fingers tightened painfully in my hair for just a second before he loosened his grip.
"So good, baby. Take some more for me. Just a little deeper."
I kept going, surprised to find I could go a little further each time. He wasn't pushing on my head anymore, but his fingers were still tangled in my hair and his hips were rising up into my face. I pressed down and the tip of him slid into my throat, my eyes watering as I swallowed around him a few times before pulling away to catch my breath.
"Fuck! Yes. Just like that..."
His words trailed off into an unintelligible babble as I took him deep again. I heard a groan rip from his throat as his dick throbbed and a second later my mouth filled with hot liquid. I swallowed as fast as I could and another spurt hit the back of my throat. His hips bucked up and he let loose one last shot before relaxing, his hand falling from my hair.
I kept sucking a few more seconds and then ran my tongue up the underside of his shaft as I lifted my head away, smiling at the little shudder that shook his body. I stretched out beside him while he caught his breath, anxiety creeping in as he continued to lie there silently.
"Was that alright?" I finally asked.
A grin split his face and he lazily opened one eye to look at me. "Yeah babe, it was more than alright. Damn, I needed that so bad. You've had me sprung for days and my hand just wasn't doing it for me."
"Oh. Well, good. I've never done that before, I wasn't sure..." I trailed off as he opened both eyes and gave me a funny look.
"You've never given a blow job?"
"No! I mean, yes, I've done that. Not a lot so I don't know how good I am at it. But I meant I've never...you know...swallowed."
"Ah." He smiled and closed his eyes again. "Well, don't worry. You sucked that dick like a pro."
"Shut up!" I punched his shoulder, laughing at him throwing my words back at me.