by Kamisa Cole
“Please, Nina… I will always cherish the memories I had with you,” tainted as they were now that I’d seen the real her, “but our path ends here. You and I cannot go on together. I’m following the rainbow bridge to where life is perfect and fun, and I’m loved unconditionally, while you’ll be crawling in misery until you find someone new to feed your ego. You were my best friend, but when I needed you… I’m sorry.” And I was, but some broken things you couldn’t mend.
Kash appeared behind her, having changed from jeans and hoodie into sweatpants and a shirt, and gave me a soft smile.
“I’m starving. Nina, I’m sure you understand that I want to share that meal with my boyfriend and with him only. I think it’s time for you to go,” he urged quietly, and she glanced at him, then looked back at me.
“Alec…”
“Go, Nini.”
I turned away from her, extra interested in straightening out the cutlery. I listened while they wordlessly walked to the door, and then Kash closed it behind the last person that could’ve swapped over from my old life to my new, but that definitely didn’t belong there.
His strong arms embraced me from behind and I leaned into him, listening to the utter silence of the apartment. There was just his breathing and mine, and it was perfect. “Maybe I shouldn’t go back to Cam’s place,” I whispered and felt his body shake with silent laughter.
“No, you’re doing that because of your best friend, and I won’t be going anywhere. You and I are in it for the long run.” He turned me in his arms and I couldn’t believe I was finally back with him. He looked peaceful, relieved, and as if, finally, everything had settled for him exactly the way it should be.
“I’m sorry things with Nina didn’t work out. I thought giving her a chance couldn’t hurt.”
I shook my head and leaned into him, inhaling his clean scent, enjoying that the leather jacket smell never really seemed to leave him. “I needed a clean break, and Nina was the last thing tying me to my past. A past I’d rather forget about.”
I felt him kiss my forehead, then my cheek, while I sighed.
He leaned back to look at me. “What?”
“I went back for something and I didn’t even get it. I…”
He smiled, then let go of me and I regretted the loss. “Here. Colt brought it. Seems your father was ranting about it.”
I took my birth certificate with shaking hands, not being able to believe that I had it, that he no longer had any hold over me. I was my own person now, and with this flimsy piece of paper in my hand I actually felt that way.
“Kash…”
The timer on the oven cut me off, and Kash smirked, taking out the lasagna before framing my face and kissing me like he never had before.
“We have to be careful, you’re hurt,” he whispered against my lips and I couldn’t believe my luck. “I mean… Unless you’re too sad to have sex.” He playfully pinched my ass and we both knew his distraction was working.
“If I ride you hardly anything will hurt,” I assured him, taking his hand to lead him to the bedroom.
Kash sat on the bed, his lips wet from how often he’d licked them, and I exhaled slowly. I’d told him what I wanted, and although I’d imagined how it would feel to be inside of him, I didn’t want it.
I always wanted it the other way around, to feel him inside me. I wanted to be the one to move on him, to bring him to the brink just with my body. I wanted to be his.
“Lube?” I asked, wishing I was already prepped so this wouldn’t be a long foreplay. Hell, if I had any choice I’d be slipping right onto him and never moving from there again.
I watched how he stretched, grabbing the lube from the bedside table and placing it next to his side. I trembled as he reached out, ghosting his hands along my body before helping me out of my shirt. “Don’t be nervous, Alec,” he pleaded, and I closed my eyes.
“I’m not. I’m worried.”
His hands paused. “Worried about what?”
My bruises. My injuries. The way I looked right now, I thought.
“You are as handsome to me as you’ve always been.” Obviously, I had spoken out loud after all.
He brushed his fingertips over the last of my bruises, then along the bandage wrapped around my chest. I didn’t have to wear it much longer, but the doctor had hoped being bandaged would make me more careful.
I wasn’t sure that was going to be working. Kash’s hands vanished inside my sweatpants, pushing them down enough to cup my ass while he drew me in and I went willingly, straddling his lap, claiming his lips. This I could do. This I knew how to do.
“You are still worth a sin, each and every time,” he murmured against my shoulder, pressing tiny kisses to my skin. I lost myself in the feeling of his scruff scratching me, and the metal of his rings pressing into my upper thighs as he squeezed them gently. I felt his fingertips wandering, clenching in anticipation even though he wasn’t anywhere near where I wanted him.
Instead he teased and nipped at me with the patience of a saint, making me squirm. I was rock hard in my pants, wishing I’d lost them before sitting down. As if hearing my thoughts, or sensing my wishes, he nudged me to stand, brushing down the material with the same patience he’d spread his kisses with. My erection stood between us, prominent and demanding, and Kash smirked, then slid to his knees.
He sat back on his heels, looking up at me before he licked from my balls up to the tip, making me hiss out a shuddered breath.
“You. Are. Too. Slow,” I stated, not even eliciting a chuckle from him. Instead he wrapped his lips around my tip, sucking me in just enough to be a mean tease, but certainly far from the friction I craved.
“Kash…”
“Shh, Baby Boy,” he whispered against my skin and then sucked me in, nipping and teasing some more until I was dripping pre-cum onto his tongue. Hell, I wanted to come so badly, I wasn’t sure I wasn’t already almost there.
However he’d done it, when his hands came back to my puckered hole they were slick this time, and I moaned when he pushed the first finger in, still sucking and teasing.
My hands dropped to his shoulders, a low moan leaving my lips as I hung my head. Maybe this was enough after all. This was so close to bliss. One finger inside of me, slowly working me open while his incredible mouth drained me of all thoughts… Yes, I could go out this way.
“More,” I rasped out because that was the end game. Prepping was a must, and my mind knew that, but my body insisted it was ready now. We wanted more.
Hell, we wanted it all.
A second finger slipped into me and I gritted my teeth for a second at the slight burn. I knew the feeling, knew exactly how it would turn to pleasure in a few moments, but the first second always came as a shock.
Suddenly my attention was fully focused back on my front and the way Kash had deep-throated me, humming and swallowing around me. I was on the brink of coming so fast that I couldn’t even utter a warning.
I spilled across his tongue and down his throat, relaxing against the hand that was holding me from behind, against the hand letting a third finger now join while I was utterly distracted and sated.
“Jesus…”
Kash pulled back, his eyes adoring as he looked up at me, and I started to move against his fingers, the friction new and different, better than ever before. “More?”
He smiled again but then his fingers were gone, and I felt empty. He stood, too, getting rid of his clothes in a hurry, then he sat on the bed again, drawing me onto his lap and bringing his fingers right into me after slicking them up yet again. Between us his erection smeared pre-cum onto my skin, and I reached for him, softly stroking. I didn’t want him to come just yet. No, I’d meant it, I wanted him inside of me.
With his free hand he drew me in and kissed me, moving me so his fingers found that spot inside of me, the one I hardly ever reached, and I bit down on his shoulder without meaning to, starting to ride his fingers. I felt full, so full, and Kash nudged me back.
“Slick me up, Alec. Get me ready.”
I didn’t let him ask me twice and spread a generous amount of lube on his dick, then I nipped at his lips. “Can we now? Please?” Because I wanted it. I wanted to be looking at him when I lowered myself onto him, when he gritted his teeth because it was too much, too good.
I wanted to see all that and more on his face.
KASH
I hadn’t been patient because I’d meant to torture Alec. Instead I’d been more than slow because I knew once I was inside him again I wouldn’t be able to hold back for long. My finger inside of him almost had been too much already, and that was nothing compared to what I felt when he lowered himself slowly down onto my cock.
I watched his face, making sure I didn’t miss any signs of pain, ready to stop whenever, even though I wanted to allow my eyes to roll back in my head.
He was tight, so tight, and hot, and he was all mine.
I’d topped enough in my life to know this was different, and I was also no longer blind as to why. Nothing compared to the way you felt when being with the one who held your heart.
God, he was slow, so slow, and I couldn’t decide if he was teasing me or if it was becoming too much too soon.
“We can…” I started, my voice barely audible, so I cleared it. “We can try another time and just…”
He grinned, wrapping his arms around my shoulders before leaning in, making me groan. “This? This is fun. The restrain on your face, Kash… Priceless.”
I pinched his ass, regretting the move instantly when he clenched around me, causing me to see stars. I grunted some unintelligible response, then decided to distract myself by peppering small kisses to his skin before catching his nipple between my teeth. He was hard again between us, his stamina not really surprising, but appreciated. While I’d be coming inside of him, I wanted him to not be able to hold out, covering me in his cum.
When I was finally, finally fully sheathed we both paused, although I had to admit it was the hardest thing I’d ever done. I waited for him to adjust properly, allowing him to distract me with kisses that made my toes curl. The way he teased my tongue, nipped on my bottom lip only to ease the sting…
“Alec…” I was desperate and there was no reason to hide it. “I need to move.” And I had to. Staying still any longer would be kill me.
It wouldn’t be the worst death, granted—
Holy mother of fucking Christ.
Alec wriggled his hips before slowly lifting himself off, his movements excruciatingly slow, and I groaned, the sound coming from deep inside me.
“So good, Kash. This feels so good,” he muttered against my lips while I grabbed his ass, holding him relatively still. I liked him setting the rhythm, and I knew he’d craved exactly that since we’d become serious, but if he was going to do the work I couldn’t be sure he’d be watching out for his injuries. While I wanted this right now with him, I also wouldn’t go through with it knowing he’d end up more hurt.
“See,” he rasped out, clearly having felt my hesitation, “you can still think too much, or you wouldn’t be drifting off on me.” I knew he was trying to make a joke, but I heard the edge in his voice.
“Injured,” I grunted. “Need to be careful.”
He shook his head, his hands going into my hair to softly tug until I met his eyes. “You need to fuck me until all I can think about is you, Kash. Right now. Take me to the stars.”
I didn’t know how in the world I deserved him, but I moved my hips with more force, squeezing my eyes shut as feelings overwhelmed me. He was all mine. He was fine. And we’d get to do this until the end of time.
I felt him nudge my shoulder and knew what he wanted, so I pulled him closer, holding onto him with one arm before moving us both further onto the bed. He moaned out loud as I hit his prostate, and I did it again for good measure.
And then again.
And another time.
Alec coming undone like this, his throat stretched because he’d thrown his head back, his body glistening with sweat… It was picture-perfect, and I hoped I’d be able to commit this to memory.
Then he had to go and shatter all my romantic thoughts with one sentence. “I cannot wait until you can fuck me into the mattress, hard.”
I nearly came just from his words and, as if he knew, Alec flexed his ass, causing me to hit the ground running. I reached between us, grabbing his cock, and stroked him in the rhythm of my thrusts, knowing fully well he’d started moving against me, taking everything I gave and demanding more.
“Alec…” I came with his name on my lips, biting down to keep from being any louder, and felt him fuck himself on me, helping me to ride out my pleasure while stickiness coated us both as he had followed suit almost instantly.
Once I had my breath back under control, he leaned over, my limp dick slipping from him. “This was better than I thought it would be with us so close,” he whispered against my lips and then kissed me.
“Clean up,” I ordered, holding him against me while walking us both into the shower where I thoroughly washed him, not surprised when his eyes started to get heavy.
Once he was wrapped in a towel I kissed the tip of his nose. “Let me check the sheets, then we can sleep.”
“Will sleep in cum. I’m tired,” he muttered, and I chuckled. I felt satiated in every fiber of my body, a happy exhaustion, and yet Alec was my first priority. The bed was fine, and he snuggled under the blankets with a sigh while I went around the apartment and turned off the lights that were still burning. I also put the lasagna away, knowing it would be just as good reheated, then I crawled into bed next to him, hoping and praying that he’d never tire of me because I knew I’d never get enough of him, no matter how many years there were to come.
ALEC
I glanced at Kash, unsure of what to think or do.
“Am I good?” I brushed my hands over the button-down and my dark denims, then glanced back at my boyfriend, who was a perfect picture of calm.
“You, handsome, are better than good.” He hooked his fingers into the loops of my jeans and drew me closer. He wore his jeans and a dark shirt, all signature clothing for him, and I didn’t think he could be any hotter.
That didn’t make me worry less though. “Better than good, okay, but good enough to meet family I’ve never talked to before?”
Although that was a lie. I had spoken to my aunt briefly when she’d shown up at DiverCity about two months after my father had nearly killed me and had asked for me. I didn’t know what had convinced Gage to get me from the kitchen, but before hearing who she was I knew. The resemblance to my dad was uncanny, even if her features were a lot softer.
The doorbell rang and Kash let go of me. “Are you ready? They’ll love you.”
“What if my cousin hates me?” I had a cousin coming along with my aunt because…
Well, truth be told, I didn’t know why he was coming. I hadn’t even known there was more family on my father’s side.
Kash vanished, not even dignifying me with an answer, and I stayed in the kitchen, my heart thudding so loudly in my ears that I didn’t hear the short exchange in the hallway, then my aunt stood in front of me.
“Sybelle,” I greeted her, holding out my hand, but she passed by that and pulled me into a hug instead. Behind her, eyes on Kash, stood a guy with gray eyes and raven hair. He was lean and tall, but still missing a few inches on me.
“You must be Lennard.” I didn’t know why I suddenly felt like I was a hundred years old. “And the two of you have met Kash. He’s my… He’s…” I wasn’t ashamed of him, wasn’t ashamed of who I was, but for some reason the word boyfriend didn’t leave my lips. I glanced at Kash, wondering if he was mad, but there was nothing but understanding in his eyes.
“Your boyfriend. You can say it, Alec. We know. In fact, it’s why I came to find you.” Sybelle looked back at her son, who suddenly seemed incredibly interested in his shoes. “Len is a senior at Atkins High. They have a thin
g going on, a huge part of their final grade and…” She shook her head. “You know what? He should tell you.”
“Maybe we should sit first,” Kash suggested and I silently thanked him for that. My mind was all over the place and I couldn’t even remember my manners. He waited until everyone was seated around his kitchen table, then he passed me after pressing a kiss to the top of my head. He offered coffee and cake—which we’d bought specifically for this—and everyone accepted.
After all, sometimes talking was easier if your hands were busy.
“Social experiment. We get sorted into discriminated groups. I’m gay.”
I choked on the piece of cake I’d just swallowed, and Kash licked his lips with a grin. “Gay?” I coughed out and Len rolled his eyes.
“For the experiment. Instead of black or disabled, I got assigned to be gay. We’re supposed to talk to people about what’s hard for them, and Mom remembered her fucking brother—”
“Language, Lennard,” Sybelle scolded.
“Her brother,” Lennard adjusted, “said you were gay, and she wanted an excuse to come and meet you anyway, so here we are. Happy family.”
Lennard’s defenses were up, and I couldn’t help but throw Kash a questioning glance. Besides the fact that I was practically a teenager myself, I had a feeling there was much more to this than just some experiment.
At least for Lennard.
“Being gay is not as bad as being disabled,” Kash stated, his voice calm and deep.
Lennard’s cheeks heated, and his ears turned an angry red. “Yeah, God, no.” He stumbled over his words, and when he clearly couldn’t find anything to say, he picked up his fork and shoveled the cake in.
We were all silent for a moment, and I couldn’t help but think that Kash was the only one utterly relaxed.
“We don’t we cut to the chase. Sybelle? Why are you here? It’s obvious Len doesn’t want to talk to Alec, so…?” he prompted, his inquiring gaze on my aunt.
She blushed under his scrutiny. “Family. I’ve longed to meet my nephew since I heard I was going to be an aunt, and…” She swallowed. “I didn’t think he’d meet me without a proper reason. Despite that though… Len does have a paper to write on gay people and their troubles.”