A Very Special Marriage
Page 10
Sophie packed a small haversack with everything she would need and left it on her bunk. Once morning surgery was over she had the rest of the day free and she intended to make the most of it.
She’d tried not to let Liam see how upset she’d been at the thought of the mess she’d made of things, but the strain of constantly being on her guard was starting to tell on her nerves. It would be good to get away from the ship and relax for a few hours. Maybe it would help her put things into perspective. There was no point in continually blaming herself for not having trusted Liam when it wouldn’t change what had happened. Their marriage was over. Period.
She was just about to go for breakfast when there was a knock on her cabin door. She hurried to answer it, smiling when she found Charlie Henshaw outside. ‘Good morning, Charlie. How are you today?’
‘Not too bad, thank you, miss.’ He handed her a slip of paper. ‘Message for you from the purser’s office. I said I’d deliver it seeing as I was coming this way.’
‘Oh, right. Thanks, Charlie.’
She went back inside and read the note. It was a message from the employment agency, informing her that a replacement nurse had been hired and would join the ship when it returned to Palma the following Saturday.
Sophie sank onto the bunk as it hit her that she had just seven more days left on board the ship. Even though she’d asked to be replaced, it still came as a shock to discover she would be leaving so soon.
She quickly skimmed through the rest of the message and sighed when she read the final paragraph, informing her that the cost of her flight home from Mallorca would be deducted from her salary because she’d broken the terms of her contract. Not only would she be out of a job in a week’s time but she would be out of pocket as well, it seemed!
The realisation put rather a dampener on her plans for the day. She decided to skip breakfast in the dining-room because she wasn’t in the mood to make conversation. She went to the LiteBite Café instead, ordered a large cup of coffee and took it back to the surgery.
Sitting down at the desk, she sipped the coffee while she tried to formulate some plans. As soon as she got back to England she would have to find another job. Obviously, she couldn’t go back to the same agency when she was persona non grata there so she would have to contact a different one. Inevitably, that would mean time wasted while she went for interviews.
As for the kind of job she took, well, she certainly couldn’t afford to be choosy. She’d spent the bulk of her savings on the clothes she’d bought for the trip and what little was left wouldn’t last long if she had to pay rent and living costs. All things considered, it was rather a bleak outlook so it was hardly surprising that she was looking decidedly dejected when Liam arrived.
‘What’s up? You look as though you’ve lost a pound and found the proverbial penny.’
‘Knowing my luck at the moment, I probably wouldn’t even find the penny.’ She sighed when he looked at her quizzically. ‘The agency has found someone to replace me. They’re going to fly her out to Palma next Saturday.’
‘That was quick!’
Sophie shrugged, refusing to dwell on the fact that he’d sounded dismayed by the announcement. What difference did it make to Liam when she was leaving? ‘They must have pulled out all the stops to find someone suitable.’
‘So what will you do?’ He frowned as he perched on the edge of the desk. ‘You’ll need a place to live for starters so can you go back to your old flat?’
‘I doubt it. The landlord told me that he had someone interested in it so he’s probably rented it out by now. Anyway, I’ve not decided where I’m going to live yet.’
‘So you’re not going back to Derbyshire, then?’
‘I haven’t made up my mind yet.’
She picked up a pen and started to doodle on the blotter because the thought of how uncertain the future was made her feel all panicky inside. She’d never been an impulsive sort of a person and wasn’t used to having to make major decisions on the spur of the moment.
‘But surely it would make more sense if you went back there? Starting off in a strange place, where you know nobody, won’t be easy, Sophie, believe me.’
‘I know that. I’m not a child, Liam, so, please, don’t treat me like one!’
‘I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry. It’s just that I’m worried about you.’
Her heart skipped a beat when she heard the genuine concern in his voice. She was sorely tempted to ask his advice, only it would be wrong to do that. Liam had his own life to think about and she couldn’t expect him to solve her problems. She had to stand on her own two feet.
‘And I didn’t mean to snap,’ she said quietly, staring fixedly at the patterns she’d made on the blotter when she felt her eyes fill with tears. The past few days had been a strain and now this coming on top was just too much to cope with.
‘This is all my fault. If I hadn’t been so damned set on sorting things out then you’d be carrying on exactly as you’d planned!’
Liam got up and angrily paced the floor. ‘You’d have a good job on board this ship and another few months to decide what you really want to do, instead of being faced with all these problems.’
Sophie shook her head because it wasn’t fair to let him think he was to blame for her predicament. ‘You only did what you thought was right, Liam. If anyone’s to blame then it’s me.’
‘You? How do you work that out?’
Her heart ached when she saw the frown on his face. It struck her then that if she’d been having a difficult time in the past few days, so, too, had Liam. Even though she’d decided never to mention the past again, she couldn’t just leave things the way they were.
‘Because I should have trusted you when you told me that you’d not had an affair,’ she said truthfully.
‘And I should have tried harder to convince you instead of letting my pride get in the way.’ He sighed. ‘Neither of us was thinking clearly because of what we’d been through and we failed to make any allowances for that.’
‘We didn’t. But at least we’ve cleared everything up now so that’s one good thing that has come out of all this.’
‘Ever the optimist, Sophie?’ he said softly, and she flushed when she heard the warmth in his voice.
‘Better than being a pessimist, even though it’s a lot harder work.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘You try being upbeat when you’re going to have to relinquish all this luxury!’
She summoned a smile but it was difficult to ignore the warmth that was seeping through her veins. ‘There’ll be no more cordon bleu meals served by waiters whose only aim in life is to tempt your jaded palate. No more stewards to clear up after you. I don’t know how I’ll cope with my usual humdrum existence now I’ve had a taste of the good life!’
‘You’ll manage.’
Liam’s tone was warmer than ever and her temperature whooshed up another few degrees. Sophie tensed when he came over to the desk. It was difficult to hide how on edge she felt when he bent down so that his face was only inches away from hers. He studied her intently for several heart-melting seconds then slowly shook his head.
‘Nope. I can’t see any sign of them.’
‘Any sign of what?’ she demanded sharply, because her heart was in serious danger of turning to mush.
‘Your halo and wings, of course.’ He chuckled when she looked at him blankly. ‘Only a real, bona fide angel could remain so positive in the face of such adversity. It’s just working out where you’ve hidden your angel accoutrements that puzzles me.’
‘Idiot!’ she retorted, her tension swept away by a sudden rush of laughter.
‘That’s better.’ He touched the tiny mole at the corner of her mouth with the tip of one long finger. ‘There’s nothing better than an angel with a smile on her lips.’
Sophie’s laughter abruptly faded when she saw the expression in his eyes. Maybe it was crazy to let herself get carried away by what it seemed to
be telling her, but she couldn’t help it. Liam was looking at her as though she was the most special person in the whole world, and it was an amazing feeling.
She wasn’t sure what might have happened if there hadn’t been a knock on the door at that moment. Liam straightened abruptly but she could hear the roughness in his voice, a betraying sign that he’d been as deeply affected by that look they’d shared as she had been.
‘Sounds as though our first patient has arrived. Would you mind taking down the details while I get ready?’
‘Of course.’
Sophie got up from her desk as he went into the consulting room. She went to the door but paused to take a deep breath before she opened it. She wanted to be sure that none of the turmoil she felt showed on her face, although it was hopeless trying to pretend that nothing had happened. Liam had looked at her just now as though she still meant something to him, but surely that couldn’t be true?
‘Paul said I was making a lot of fuss about nothing but I just wanted to check, Dr Kennedy.’
‘And you were right to do so, Mrs Rogers.’ Liam smiled reassuringly at the anxious young woman who was cradling a baby in her arms. The little girl was just three months old and had been suffering from sickness and diarrhoea during the night. Although she didn’t appear to be seriously ill, he didn’t intend to take any chances.
‘Young babies like Lucy soon become dehydrated so it’s essential to seek medical advice whenever something like this happens. I’m going to prescribe an electrolyte mixture, which will replace the water and salts she’s lost. Don’t give her any milk for the next twenty-four hours then, if the symptoms have cleared up, you can gradually re-introduce it.’
He jotted some notes on a piece of paper and handed it to Angela Rogers. ‘The first feed should consist of one part milk to three of water, the second of equal parts milk and water, the third three parts milk to one of water and the fourth feed can be undiluted milk. Is that clear?’
‘I think so.’ Angela frowned as she read through the instructions. She seemed very tense and anxious, and his tone softened.
‘Don’t worry too much about it now. Bring Lucy back to see me in the morning and I’ll run through it all again. The main thing to concentrate on at the moment is making sure she doesn’t become dehydrated. However, I’m sure she’s going to be fine.’
‘Thank you, Doctor. I expect you think it’s silly but I tend to panic when she seems a bit off-colour.’ Tears welled into the young mother’s eyes as she looked at the child. ‘I lost a baby before I had Lucy, you see. She was stillborn and I’m so scared something is going to happen to Lucy as well…’
She bit her lip. Liam reached across the desk and patted her hand. He understood only too well what she must be going through and his heart ached for her.
‘Lucy will be fine. This is just one of those minor setbacks that happen to many babies,’ he said huskily, because his own anguish at losing Zoë made the young mother’s story all the more poignant. ‘By tomorrow morning, she will be much better. You’ll see. But make sure you bring her back so I can check her over and run through the feeding regime again.’
‘You’re very kind.’ Angela wiped her eyes with a tissue. ‘It gets Paul down because I keep worrying all the time that something is going to happen to her. That’s why he wanted us to come on this cruise. He thought it would be good for us to get away and have a complete change of scene.’
‘I’m sure it will help, although you’re bound to worry. It’s only natural in the circumstances.’ He frowned. ‘Were you planning on going ashore today? To be honest, Mrs Rogers, I don’t think it would be wise to take Lucy out in this heat.’
‘We were going to do some sightseeing but not any more,’ she said firmly. ‘I’m going to stay on board the ship and if Paul still wants to go then that’s up to him.’
‘I think it would be best,’ Liam agreed, inwardly sighing because it was obvious the trip was creating more problems for the young couple than it was resolving.
He saw Angela out, thinking how sad it was that people found it so difficult to talk to each other. Loving someone didn’t always mean you were able to communicate your feelings to them. Sometimes it was because you were afraid of hurting them, as had been the case with him and Sophie.
His heart filled with a mixture of emotions as he glanced at her. He’d desperately wanted to protect her from the pain of their child’s death but he’d not allowed for the fact that he’d been too stricken by grief himself to help her. It was a mistake he would have to live with for the rest of his life.
There were no more patients to see so Liam wrote up the case notes then went back to the office and dropped the file in the tray on Sophie’s desk. ‘Looks as though that’s it for today. Folk are obviously more interested in going ashore than being ill.’
‘I don’t blame them.’ She picked up the file and quickly entered the details into the computer. ‘I intend to go ashore once I’ve finished this.’
‘Of course, it’s your day off, isn’t it?’ He grinned. ‘What are you planning on doing? Hitting the shops in Valletta?’
‘No, I thought something a bit more educational today.’ She printed out a copy of the notes for the accounting department and gave it to him to sign. ‘I’m going to M’dina which, according to my guidebook, was Malta’s original capital city.’
‘Oh, pardon me!’ He scrawled his signature in the space at the bottom and passed the sheet back to her. ‘I’d forgotten what a culture vulture you are.’
‘Culture vulture?’ She burst out laughing and he felt his heart lift because it had been a long time since he’d heard such unaffected pleasure in her voice. ‘I hope that wasn’t a dig at me?’
‘Of course not!’ he denied, grinning at her. ‘Just because you once told me that if you saw another museum you’d scream doesn’t mean that I think you are a shallow person…’
‘Any normal person would have been fed up if they’d been dragged round every single museum in London! I mean, there’s only so much culture the average person can absorb in one day.’
‘I know. I know.’ He held up his hands. ‘And I’m sorry, both for the gibe and the fact that I dragged you round all those exhibitions. I just couldn’t bring myself to tell you that I was broke and couldn’t afford to take you somewhere more glamorous. I was still at the desperately-wanting-to-impress-you stage, you see.’
‘Thank heavens it wore off,’ she retorted. ‘If I’d had to ooh and ah over another piece of broken pottery, I’d have gone barking mad. I was starting to have serious doubts as to whether I’d made a mistake by going out with you!’
‘Maybe you did,’ he said flatly, because it hurt to imagine how different her life might have been if she’d met and married someone else. She might have had a home and a family by this stage, all the things she’d always dreamed of having. He couldn’t help feeling guilty because of the way things had turned out for them.
‘I disagree. I don’t regret meeting you, Liam. I never have. The only thing I regret is how badly it all ended. Still, there’s no point dwelling on that now, is there? It’s all in the past and we have to concentrate on the future.’
She stood up. ‘And talking about the future, I’d better take this to the office before I go ashore.’
‘Yes. Of course,’ he replied hollowly.
He sat down at the desk after she left because his legs suddenly felt too weak to support him. He’d always believed that Sophie had regretted falling in love with him, but it wasn’t true. What she regretted was the way her love for him had ended.
His heart spasmed with pain because the thought that she no longer loved him was just so hard to bear.
The sun was beating down on the walled city of M’dina, raising the temperature to a level that soon had Sophie wilting. She’d slathered sunscreen all over her arms and legs and worn a hat to shade her face, but she simply wasn’t used to such temperatures. After just an hour spent exploring, she was ready to leave, but the t
hought of returning to the ship was more than she could bear. She needed a bit more time on her own after the conversation she’d had with Liam that morning.
Pain speared through her and she sighed. Talking about how much she’d loved Liam had brought back all the heartache, but there was no point thinking about it. She’d come ashore with the express intention of getting away from her problems so she would take a break then visit the cathedral in Pjazza San Pawl. According to her guidebook, there was a magnificent fresco of the shipwreck of St Paul in the apse which she wanted to see.
She spotted a sign directing her to a tearoom when she reached the end of the street. She went inside and ordered a bottle of mineral water and a sandwich then went to find herself a seat on the terrace. All the tables in the shade were taken and she was just turning to go back inside when she spotted Randolph Walters waving to her.
‘Looks like you two have had the same idea as me,’ she said as she went over to their table.
‘Gloria was starting to feel a little uncomfortable from all this heat so we thought we’d have a rest,’ Randolph explained, getting up to courteously pull out a chair for Sophie to sit down.
‘It really is scorchingly hot today,’ she agreed. She glanced at Gloria and frowned when she saw how pale the older woman looked. Beads of perspiration were standing out on Gloria’s upper lip and forehead, even though it was relatively cool in this part of the terrace.
‘Are you feeling all right, Gloria?’ she asked in concern.
‘Oh, I’ll be fine once I’ve had chance to cool down,’ the woman assured her.
Sophie wasn’t convinced but she decided not to press the point. The waiter arrived with her order so she cut into her sandwich while Randolph told her about all the places they’d visited since they’d left the ship. They seemed to have crammed an awful lot into a short space of time, especially bearing in mind how hot it was that day. Sophie was just thinking it was little wonder Gloria looked worn out when she heard the older woman gasp as she clutched her chest.