They’d made port over the months since leaving St. Kitts, but only for the least amount of time Blake could get away with as he’d always been anxious to get back out. He’d worked his crew hard these last months and they had heavy pockets to show for it.
Unfortunately the sea didn’t hold the appeal it used to. His ship, the very thing that had always brought him peace, had become an endless collection of memories that always chose the most inopportune moments to bob to the surface.
He’d almost been shot when an enemy’s pistol had reminded Blake of the one Alicia had strapped to her thigh and he’d paused almost too long when the vision of her wearing only that had exploded into his mind. He’d regained his senses in time to jump to the side and fire off a shot without getting himself killed, but it had been damn close.
There was also the time he’d gone ashore in Nassau. He’d spotted a woman walking in a way that reminded him of Alicia, even though logically he knew she was in Port Royal. In his excitement, he’d chased after the lady, only to have her whack him with her parasol when he grabbed her arm and spun her around.
That was weeks ago and he hadn’t been ashore since. He’d worked until exhaustion had demanded he sleep, but that wasn’t always enough. The bed reminded him of Alicia and there were times, in his dreams, when he smelled her.
And then there were Nate and Vincent, or the lack thereof. The ship was quiet. Who knew, Blake thought as he ordered the sails to be trimmed, that he’d miss Vincent’s nagging and his and Nate’s constant arguing? But he did. He often found himself turning to ask Nate a question, only to face nothing but air. There was no off-tune whistling, no friendly teasing. Nothing was as it used to be, and though Blake had known it was going to be that way when he’d said farewell to his friends, he hadn’t realized just how much the changes would hurt.
“Drop the anchor!” he shouted.
“Captain? How long are we staying?” his new first mate asked from the main deck. The rest of the crew stopped their tasks to listen.
He decided if being at sea wasn’t keeping his thoughts off Alicia, he’d give it a go on land. “Four days all right?”
It was the longest they’d stayed anywhere since leaving St. Kitts and everyone cheered. They saw to the rest of their duties in record time and soon the longboat was cutting through the water to shore. Blake headed straight for Doubloons. If he was going to drink himself into oblivion, he may as well do it with a friend.
Doubloons was crowded and pulsed with activity. Singing, laughing, catcalls, and swearing all mixed together. Thick candles wavered on shaky tables, and the smell of rum and sweat hung in the air. Blake cast a glance around the room, saw whom he was looking for, and wove his way through bodies that already swayed from too much drink. A few women tried to waylay him, sliding an arm across his shoulders. Others were bolder and squeezed his backside. Blake didn’t acknowledge any of them and continued to his destination, where he took a chair opposite his friend.
“Blake!” Captain roared. He grinned, caught a passing barmaid, and ordered two more drinks. The woman looked at Blake, her eyes dropped, and she leaned forward. It was a wonder her bosom didn’t fall onto the table and snuff out the candles.
“Anything else I can get you?” she purred.
Blake shook his head and she pouted as she turned away. Captain’s laughter shook the table.
“You really ought to teach me that trick,” he said, his eyes dancing.
“I’ve told you, it’s a curse.”
“Well, then, it’s a curse I’d surely love to ’ave!” He took a swig of his drink. “Haven’t seen ya in a while. Been busy, have ya?” he asked with enough of a twinkle in his eye that Blake knew just what he was implying.
“You make a habit of telling people to stow away on my ship?”
“Only the pretty ones.”
The barmaid came behind Blake, reached over, and set his mug on the table. Her breast brushed the side of his face. Blake shifted away, earning a disgruntled sigh from the wench and a disappointed shake of the head from Captain.
“Now ya see, Blake. That’s why I did it. Ya need to have some fun. Ya could take her upstairs, forget yer troubles.”
“I’m not interested,” he mumbled into his cup.
“Ah, but were ya interested in Alicia?”
Blake took another gulp. Captain’s belly jiggled with laughter. He should have known the man would want to talk about Alicia, and Blake couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps that was the real reason he’d sought him out after all.
“I knew it!” He looked rather proud of himself. “And I was right about St. Kitts bein’ where she’d find Samantha.”
Blake frowned. “How could you possibly know that?”
Captain grinned. “They were here, Samantha and Luke, a few months back.”
“With Alicia?”
“No. I figured Alicia was with ya.”
Blake’s mouth flattened. “No. She’s back in Port Royal, running her blacksmith shop.”
Captain guffawed. “If it’s still standin’.”
“Of course it is, why wouldn’t it be?”
“Ya haven’t heard?”
Fear slid low in Blake’s belly and he leaned forward. “Heard what?”
“Port Royal was sacked about a month or so ago.”
Blake’s mouth went dry as dust. “How bad?”
Captain shrugged. “Ya know how it is. Some claim there’s hardly anythin’ left, and others say the locals put up a hell of a fight.”
He remembered the look on Alicia’s face after she’d regained her memory, how pale and devastated she’d been. He remembered how close she’d come to being seriously hurt at Samantha’s house. Now he pictured her in the shop, fighting off pirates while the town around her was being attacked. Had her shop survived? Had she been hurt? He shoved to his feet.
“Where ya goin’? Ya haven’t finished yer drink.”
But Blake didn’t answer. He was too busy running out the door.
At first glance it looked every bit as awful as his mind had imagined on the interminable sail over. There were several skeletal remains of houses and businesses that hadn’t survived the attack but they seemed contained to the streets closest to the water. As he ran farther in toward the blacksmith shop, the damage diminished considerably. There were fewer walls seared black, fewer windows boarded up.
When he rounded the corner and saw the shop, saw the same sign that had hung over the door as long as he could remember, he stumbled to a stop. It was there. It was still there.
The pressure eased around his heart and Blake leaned against a nearby business while he got his breath back. The shop was all right, which gave him every reason to believe that Alicia was as well. He could leave now, he thought.
Only it wasn’t that simple. Now that he was here, he desperately wanted to see her. He didn’t know what he’d say; he knew only that he had to see her.
He opened the door to the shop and was blasted with memories. He saw his father stirring the embers, saw him turn at the sound of his sons coming in. He’d set aside whatever he was working on to give his boys his undivided attention. His hands had been gentle and his voice, as he reminded them to be home in time for dinner so that their mother wouldn’t worry, was gentle. Blake closed his eyes. Why, before he’d run off to sea, hadn’t he realized that everything his father had ever done for both him and Eric had been done out of love?
“Daniel?”
Blake blinked away the memories, the stab of guilt, and the sharp bite of regret. He focused on the man before him.
“Charles. It’s good to see you.” Blake stepped forward and shook the man’s hand.
“Never thought I’d see you step foot in here again,” he said, eyeing Blake cautiously.
“Never thought I would,” Blake acknowledged. He looked around the room, saw it was exactly as he remembered, and for the first time in months, breathed a sigh of contentment. Coming home wasn’t so bad.
“I hear
d about the pirate attack. Doesn’t seem as though it touched the shop.”
“We were fortunate. The town fought back, caught a few of the bastards before they could get too close, but I think they were new at the job. Bunch of young whelps thought they could get rich quick.”
“Didn’t work?”
“No, the Navy corralled them fairly quick. They’re cooling their heels in prison while they await their hanging.”
“Alicia wasn’t hurt?”
Charles’s gaze hardened. “Is that why you’re here? You’ve come for her?”
Blake flinched. “I heard about the attack and wanted to make sure she’s all right.”
“She is. Does that mean you’ll be leaving straightaway?”
Blake rubbed his eye. “I don’t know.”
“I see,” Charles said. His mouth pinched. “Well, take it from me, she’s fine. It’s best if you simply left.”
“I’d rather see for myself.”
Charles grabbed a sword, swished it back and forth. Since he wasn’t armed, Blake eyed it warily.
“You hurt her, Daniel.” He stopped, grimaced. “Hell, I don’t even know what to call you. She calls you Blake but I’ve only known you as Daniel.”
“It’s Blake now, and she wasn’t the only one hurt by what happened between us.”
Charles scoffed. “Perhaps not, but she’s the one that’ll keep paying for it, won’t she?”
Charles’s gaze widened and he clapped his mouth shut. Cursing under his breath, he turned and resumed working.
Blake’s stomach dropped to his knees. “What aren’t you telling me?”
Charles shuffled around the room, doing nothing more, Blake knew, than trying to look busy. Blake couldn’t contemplate what the man’s words hinted at. Unless Alicia told everyone they’d made love, which he couldn’t see, there was no reason for Alicia to pay for what they’d done together. Unless …
“Where is she?” Blake asked. Silence followed, had Blake’s nerves crawling along his skin. “Where?” he demanded.
Charles spun around, sword in hand, and before Blake could move, the tip of it was pressed against his throat.
“You break her heart again and I’ll hunt you down myself. She’s a good woman with a big heart and she doesn’t deserve to be trifled with.”
Blake didn’t move but his eyes bore into Charles’s.
“I’m not leaving until I find her, and since she’s not here, she’s likely at home. I’ll simply look for her there.”
Charles sighed heavily, lowered the weapon. Blake nodded and turned for the door.
“Do her a favor, Daniel,” he called at his back, “and don’t go to her unless you’re going to stay.”
Without bothering to answer, Blake let himself out.
Alicia traced her parents’ names on the wooden headstones. Though there was only one mound, as her father’s body was lost at sea, at least there were two markers. Her father’s life wouldn’t be forgotten.
“You did beautiful work on them, Sam.” Alicia struggled to stand and gratefully accepted Sam’s help. Though it had taken her a while to show, she’d made up for it and was now big with child.
“I enjoyed doing it. Just as I was glad to fashion the cradle.”
Alicia grinned. “It’s pretty.”
Sam rubbed Alicia’s belly. “How has it been?” she asked.
Alicia shrugged. “As expected. Charles’s wife has been a godsend, though. She answers all my questions, and she’s passed me clothing and blankets for the baby. She told me where to find that rocking chair I have in the nursery and she’s also agreed to help look after the baby while I work with Charles.”
“Aidan wasn’t too much for you?”
“He’s wonderful, Sam. We got a chance to really know each other. I’ll miss him when he leaves with you.”
“You could always come with us to St. Kitts.”
“This is my home, Sam. I can’t leave here any more than you’d want to leave St. Kitts.”
“I know.” She smiled sadly. “But I can’t imagine not being around to see your child grow.”
“It’s lucky you make fast ships,” Alicia said as she took Sam’s hand. “You can get here quicker.”
“And I plan on visiting often,” Sam said.
Alicia leaned her head on her sister’s shoulder. “I hope so.”
Then, without warning, Alicia shivered. It was like the day of Jacob’s funeral when she’d felt the intensity of a stranger’s glare. Of course, that had turned out to be Blake. Alicia gasped, spun.
There he was. Her knees shook as her eyes drank in his presence. His dark hair was long and loose, framing a face that was carved in her memory. Except in her memory his eyes weren’t like the banked fire in the blacksmith shop. In her mind they weren’t blazing at her in anger. He’d never looked more like a pirate. Though she knew it was too late, she placed both hands over her belly.
Blake couldn’t believe his eyes. He’d told himself, as he’d run to the house, that it couldn’t be. Alicia couldn’t be having his child. And when he’d first arrived, she’d had her back to him and had looked exactly as he remembered. But then she’d turned and he’d seen the roundness of her belly, knew she couldn’t have much longer and felt as though someone had shot him in the chest. He strode toward her, cut a glance to Samantha when she tried to step in front of her sister. Alicia stopped her with her hand.
“You were going to keep this from me?” he asked when he found his voice.
“Yes.”
The fact that there was no hesitation, no remorse in hiding his child, made Blake livid. He had a right to know, dammit! He took two steps closer and ground his teeth when she raised her chin and looked at him defiantly. He barely noticed when Samantha slipped away.
“Why?”
“You should know why, Blake. I can’t live at sea and I wasn’t going to make you give up your dream. I certainly didn’t want to spend the rest of my life watching you gaze hungrily out to sea the way your father did.”
His gaze kept dropping to her belly, which she kept guarded with her hands. “And so you took the decision away from me?”
“Yes. I had no doubt that if you knew I was carrying your child, you’d do the right thing and marry me. But I never wanted you with me out of obligation, Blake. That’s why I didn’t say anything in St. Kitts.”
A sharp stab hit him in the forehead and he pressed his hand to the pain.
“Was our child ever going to know about me, or were you planning on keeping that a secret as well?”
She crossed her arms above the bulge of her stomach, a stomach Blake ached to touch.
“The child was going to have your name, Blake.”
“And what about me? How can you think of giving my child my name, while at the same time denying me a chance to know him?”
Alicia’s eyes gleamed with tears. “Do you think that was a decision I came to lightly?”
“How should I know?” Blake roared. “You never bothered to discuss it with me.”
“Then let me tell you,” she answered. “It was the hardest damn thing I ever did. I didn’t set out to lie to you, but when was I supposed to tell you? When you were yelling at me for not wanting to be a privateer’s wife? When you were accusing me of being manipulative? You tell me, Blake, when was I supposed to tell you I was pregnant?”
He rubbed his forehead, where an incessant throbbing was making it hard for him to think.
“I had a right to know.”
She exhaled heavily. “Yes, you did. But I had a right to protect my heart. I’d rather know you’re out at sea happy than miserable with me.”
Blake scoffed. “Happy? I wouldn’t go that far.”
Alicia winced suddenly and pushed at the side of her belly. Blake was instantly at her side.
“What is it?”
“He’s stretching and it hurts. Here, feel this. I think it’s his foot.”
She grabbed his hand and placed it over her belly, where
a small bump was pushing outward. He circled it, amazed, then it disappeared. For a moment he lost his breath.
“Do you know if it’s a boy?” His heart fluttered at the thought.
“There’s no way to know but I prefer to call the baby a he rather than an it.”
“How soon until we know?”
Alicia smiled and he’d never seen anything so beautiful in his life.
“A month or so.”
Blake’s head went light. “I think I need to sit down.” Mindful of the fact that they were at a grave, Blake moved away from the mound and was relieved when Alicia followed him. He helped her down before he sat beside her.
“Why are you here, Blake?”
“I heard about the attack.”
“Well, as you can see, I’m fine.”
“And I made a decision about my half of the blacksmith shop.”
She eyed him warily. “I don’t have the money to pay you your share.”
“I don’t want money. I’m not selling my share. I’m keeping it.”
“Why? You hate it.”
He shook his head. “No, I don’t. I realized that when I thought it was gone. When Captain said Port Royal had been attacked, I had to come. I had to see if you were all right. But what I hadn’t realized until I arrived, until I opened that heavy door, was that a part of me had also been worried about the shop.”
He shrugged his shoulders. “I thought if I was here that I’d dwell on the fact that Eric and my father are gone, but when I walked into the shop, it was as though they were there. There are so many good memories tied to the shop, Alicia, and while I can’t bring either my father or Eric back, I can honor them by being there.
“You went looking for your past, Alicia. You needed to know where you came from and who you were. Perhaps I had to leave for the same reason, to learn who I was. I know the answer now. The shop isn’t only my past, it’s my legacy.”
Alicia had to blink away the tears. If Jacob could see his son now.
“You love the sea, Blake.”
His eyes latched onto hers. “I do, but it alone can’t make me happy. I learned that these last months. You were gone, Nate and Vincent were gone. I love the water, Alicia, but I realize that I love the shop as well. And more than anything in this world, I love you.”
Romancing the Pirate Page 26