He walked over to her and leaned his arm against the doorframe just over her head. “Be honest with me. Do you want to be here? With me?”
He didn’t touch her, even though he wanted to. Those big green eyes stared up at him as though searching for something. Normally, he could read her face like a book, but at the moment, she had her walls up. Effectively keeping him out.
She rubbed at her cuff.
“Yes. But,” she looked directly into his eyes, “I was telling the truth. I won’t be someone’s guilt trip. If that’s how you feel, the answer is no.”
“Can you be patient with me? Give me a chance?” Because he was still torn. He was weighing the advice from Mick, and all his thoughts on what Cam might want, but it drove him crazy when she was away from him. Sure, she had only been here for a few months, but he couldn’t remember what his life had been like before her. Except boring. That was all he could remember about it.
She dropped her shoulders and wrapped her arms around her waist. “Working on it. Right.”
“Yeah. I never thought about what it would be like to see you again. And I for sure never thought this would happen.” Her glare had him rushing his words. “Hold on. Before you tear into me…that doesn’t mean I regret it. It means I’m trying to wrap my head around grown-up-stubborn-knock-me-on-my-ass Cassie and the kid I left at home.”
Her eyes twinkled, her expression smug. “I knocked you on your ass, huh?”
He shook his head and chuckled. “Out of everything I said, that’s what you got out of it?”
“Well, that somehow seemed important.”
Her hand played with his shirt, and he hoped that was a good sign. “So, yeah? You’ll stay?”
Her face got serious as her hand fisted in his shirt. “I can give you that. But there’s a time limit. You either figure it out or you don’t.”
She didn’t have to say what would happen if he didn’t figure it out.
He nodded. “That’s fair.”
She tilted her head, walked her fingers up his shirt, and curled her hand around his neck. She pulled him down to her, but instead of kissing him, she bit at his lower lip.
“I don’t share,” she whispered.
He grinned against her lips. “Good. Neither do I.”
She nipped at him again and, before he could do anything else, slipped away. The hem of her shirt hinted at the slight curve of her bare ass as she walked, hips swaying a little too much, to his kitchen. “I’m hungry.”
His mind blanked realizing she’d been standing there in nothing but his shirt.
Chapter 13
Cassie sat on the couch, which had been pushed out of the way, so the guys could have room for the band. There still wasn’t enough space, but for now, it was all they had.
She sipped on a beer, and kept her camera nearby so she could snap pictures while they played.
It had only been a couple of days since she’d agreed to stay with Thrand. She couldn’t help but follow him with her eyes as he set up. They still hadn’t gotten everything out but were currently at a truce of sorts. The worst part was keeping her feelings in check until Thrand could pull his head out of his ass. Because every moment spent with him pulled her in deeper than she’d already been. All she could hope for was that he figured it out, and soon. She didn’t want to think about what she’d have to do if he didn’t.
This was the first time the band practiced an entire set. Their first gig was in a few weeks at Booseys.
“Did you guys ever come up with a name?” she asked.
Ethan looked up and flashed those dimples. “DirtSlap.”
She grinned. “Good one.”
When the doorbell rang, she jumped up and opened it.
“I brought beer,” Lila said as she held up a case, then grabbed her in a hug. “Everything good?”
Cassie nodded. “For now.”
“Good.” She smiled, pecked her on the cheek, and swept past her. “Boys, I got beer.”
“What’s she doing here?” Ethan asked, a frown on his face.
Cassie looked between Lila and Ethan as they glared at each other. “She’s my best friend. That’s what she’s doing here.”
“Don’t worry, Ethan, I won’t sprinkle my fairy dust on you.”
“And I won’t send you back to Neverland.”
“Pfft…as if you could,” Lila said and gave a little wave of her hand.
“Keep that fairy dust to yourself. I don’t need my man-parts shriveled.” Ryan covered his crotch, mock disgust on his face.
“Ryan, I’m amazed it hasn’t fallen off yet. The number of times I’ve seen you with hickeys is testament to how easy you are. No telling what sort of cooties you have.” Lila inspected him like he might be contagious.
He flashed that killer smile and winked. “Are you jealous?”
“Oh, please! Don’t flatter yourself.”
Ryan grabbed a beer from her and pulled on one of her braids.
She smacked his arm.
“Owe! Why you always gotta hit me?”
“’Cause you’re a pain in the ass.”
Ethan laughed. “Ryan, don’t let that little imp beat you up. Be a man.”
“She’s mean. And who knows when she might sprinkle that fairy dust.”
Cassie giggled at the exchange, which had Ryan looking at her, all traces of humor gone. He turned to his guitar without another word. She sighed and shoved a hand through her hair. That was one complication she never saw coming.
She took the beer from Lila, pulled out several, and put the rest in the fridge. She moved back into the living room and set them on the table.
“You got water?”
Cassie turned to a voice she didn’t recognize and realized it was Zak. It was deep, smooth. It was also the first time she noticed he had extraordinary hazel eyes. His expression was blank, not smiling but not frowning either.
“Sure. Bottled okay?”
He nodded and went back to tuning his bass.
Odd choice of band members Thrand had put together. She was anxious to hear them play. She snagged a couple bottles of water and put them on the table with the beer.
“Who wants water?” Lila asked.
“Zak.”
Lila blinked. “He spoke?”
“Does he not usually?” Cassie had only met them a couple of times, so she thought maybe he was just shy.
“Never. They’ve met at Booseys several times, and I’ve yet to hear him talk. Or really even see his face for that matter.”
“He’s probably just shy.”
“He’s in a band. Doesn’t make much sense to me.” Lila fell onto the sofa and swung her leg lazily.
“It can happen.”
Cassie’s attention went to Thrand and Ryan who were deep in conversation. It was hard to believe Ryan had a thing for her. She didn’t want to be the reason their friendship ended. She let out a relieved sigh when they smiled and laughed.
She grabbed her camera and zoomed in, catching them in the act. They both looked up when they heard the click. Thrand grinned, and Ryan smirked.
“Liking the camera?” Thrand asked.
“Love it.” She snapped another one of just him.
She flopped on the couch with Lila as the guys finished setting up.
Lila slanted her bright blue eyes her way. “This has got to be the oddest bunch of guys for a country band.”
“I know. I’ve only heard them play a little, and Ethan wasn’t singing then. I’m sorry, but he doesn’t fit this scene at all. Metal maybe. But country? No way.”
Ethan looked at them and cocked a black brow. “We can hear you.”
“We know,” Cassie said.
He shook his head as he adjusted his mic stand. “Thrand, can you control your woman? She’s talking shit about me and doesn’t care if I hear.”
“Not talking shit, Ethan. Just pointing out facts.” She flashed him her sweetest smile then winked at Thrand, who merely shook his head.
“S
orry, Ethan. I can only do so much.”
Lila snickered. “So do they have a band name yet?”
“DirtSlap.”
Lila’s brows shot up. “Interesting.”
They started by playing the intro to a popular cover song, but what they did to it…and then Ethan began to sing.
Cassie was dumbfounded. The man had the type of voice that slid up your spine. His country twang mixed with an edge she’d never heard before. She knew the tune well, but it sounded completely different with the way Ryan played the guitar. Ethan’s unreal voice, and Thrand in the back adding in a lot more drums than the song originally had changed the whole feel of the song.
She glanced at Lila, and noticed she wasn’t the only one shocked. She bumped her, and Lila’s wide eyes said it all.
“Holy shit. They’re good!” Lila said.
When it was over, the girls clapped and whistled. The boys said nothing, and continued on with another song. Cassie didn’t know this one. It had to be an original because it was harder and really showcased their talents. Ethan mixed his metal voice with country lyrics and it put a whole new spin on things.
She grabbed her camera and did what she loved. She got down on her knees in front of Ethan so she could get some wild angles of him right when he let go on a long note. She did the same with all of the members. They were unique and she wanted to capture each of their personalities. She got one of Thrand, with his signature hat on backwards, while in the middle of a fast beat with his tongue sticking out at her.
When their set was over, they were all sweating and grinning like fools. Even Zak appeared happy.
*
Thrand was having the time of his life. This band clicked. Nothing tame about it, but even as he played, he was distracted by Cassie. She danced, her hair flying, hands in the air, shaking those hips in those frayed shorts. She did what she felt without a care. Every once in a while, she looked at him and smiled.
When their set ended, she leaned her head back and laughed. Joy in its purest form. She soaked up whatever life threw at her. How she was so full of life, after the way she had been forced to live, baffled him.
Lila clapped. “That was awesome, guys. Ya’ll are going to kill it.”
Cassie scooted around the band and equipment and landed in his lap. Sweat ran down his face, but she curled her arms around his neck anyway, and moved in so her breath rushed over his ear.
“You are so fucking hot,” she murmured, then used her teeth to tug at his ear.
Blood pumped south as she her tongue danced up the side of his neck. It had him seeing stars, and he barely heard the guys around him laughing.
“Dude, get a room,” Ethan said.
He placed his lips against her neck. “Cas, you’re driving me nuts. We are in a room full of people.”
Her answer was to suck on his earlobe, then stare into his eyes, a pout on her lips. “I know. I just had to taste you.”
He swallowed hard, then as quick as she was in his lap, she was gone, giving the guys high fives. Even Ryan. It took Thrand a few moments to get his head clear. Her husky words, I just had to taste you, echoed in his head and he couldn’t wait to get her alone and taste her.
It seemed like forever before everyone started to leave. Only Lila was left, lingering like she was waiting for something, but he had no idea what that might be. He was ready to be rude, and toss her out, when Cassie went into the bathroom.
Lila’s crazy blue eyes zeroed in on him.
“I want to talk to you.” She grabbed his arm and dragged him outside. He stared down at the little woman, wondering what in the hell she could want to talk about.
“Cassie’s a good girl.”
His brows shot up, not sure what to say to that. Cassie was a lot of things, but good girl wasn’t exactly on the list.
“Don’t look at me like that. Just cause she’s a lil’ bit wild doesn’t make her bad.” She poked him in the chest as though to emphasize her point.
“I never thought she was.”
“I’m telling you this for your own good, and she would hate it if she knew I said anything, but you’re so dense sometimes.” She pressed her lips in a firm line and paused as though weighing what to say next. “She loves you. You know that, right?”
Brows furrowed, he shuffled his feet. Ryan had said that too, but Thrand hadn’t believed it. At least not then.
“Geez, you are dense.” She poked him again. “Cassie might seem tough, but you saw what happened the last time you fucked it up. You do it again and I’m gonna tear you a new one.”
“Would you people just stay out of it. I’m tired of everyone telling me not to fuck it up. You don’t know the whole story. You don’t get it—”
“I know enough. Cassie’s my friend and so are you. But don’t throw away the best thing that’s ever happened to you because you’re stupid.” She glanced in the window then back at him. “I gotta go.”
She poked at him one more time, got in her car, and drove off.
He rubbed his chest.
Cassie stepped outside. “Where did Lila go?”
“She left. After lecturing me.” He walked past her and back inside. He could hear her bare feet padding after him as she shut the door.
“Oh, hell. She was supposed to stay outta this.” She shoved a hand through her hair.
It always looked mussed, but enticingly so, and he always had the urge to touch it.
“I wish they all would,” he muttered and popped the top on a beer.
“All?”
“Yeah. Mick, Ryan, Lila. I’m sure more will join in soon.” He took a sip as he watched her pace back and forth.
His gaze went to the cuff she never took off. She had modified it a little to fit her. It was worn and shiny in spots where she rubbed it when nervous. Like she was doing now. She was four parts wild, two parts innocent, and he could never figure out which one he was dealing with.
“I don’t know what she said, and I don’t want to know. But whatever it was, forget it. This is between you and me. We’ll either figure it out, or we won’t.”
Her walls were back up, no emotion at all. He slammed the beer down. He wanted to know if what Lila and Ryan said was true. If what he saw in her eyes was real, he could never get his footing around her. “Dammit, Cas. Don’t shut me out.”
“What are you talking about? I’m not shutting you out.”
“The hell you aren’t. You have more emotion in your little pinky than most have in their entire body. So when you say something without emotion, I know you’re shutting me out.”
Her face paled, then she turned away and shrugged one shoulder. “I don’t know what you want from me. I was just stating facts.”
He grabbed her and spun her to face him. He gripped her shoulders so she couldn’t turn away from him again. “Why do you keep doing this? Keeping me out.”
“How can you demand that from me when you do the same thing?” She cocked her head and glared. “Pot and kettle much?”
Stung, he let her go and picked up his beer. “You’re right.”
“Speaking of walls, how’s the ‘working on it’ thing going?” She tapped an impatient nail on the island.
He closed his eyes. Frankly, he hadn’t thought about it. When it did pop into his head, he shoved it away. He didn’t want to think about it. She consumed his every thought and kept him spinning. It was easier to get lost in her than think about Cam. He dropped his head because he didn’t have an answer.
“You haven’t even thought about it. Great.” She backed away from him a few steps. “I can’t keep doing this.”
He swung his head up. “You’re not leaving.”
“So I’m just supposed to sit here and get all—” She shook her head, ambled to the couch, and plopped on it, giving him her back.
“Get what? Finish what you were going to say.”
Her face was in her hands, her knees curled up to her chest, when he strode over to her.
“Oh hell, what
does it matter now?” She looked up at him. “To get all wrapped up in you and then you decide you can’t handle the guilt or get rid of it. And that’s a line for me. I told you that.”
Her eyes were pools of green. He couldn’t handle her tears, but he didn’t know what to do to stop them.
“Did you know, I moved out of Willie’s when I was seventeen? I lived at Ruth and Pops in the back room.”
He dropped onto the couch, one cushion separating them. He didn’t have to ask why. The marks on Cam were proof enough.
“Willie’s friends were getting a bit too friendly, and they found my hiding spot at our old fort.”
Thrand blanched. “You stayed in there? That wasn’t really a shelter.”
“No, it wasn’t. You guys did a shitty job building it ‘cause it was damn cold in there.”
He and Cam had built it when they were thirteen. Out in the woods, far enough away that Willie couldn’t find it. Thrand leaned an elbow on the back of the couch and rested his head in his hand. He couldn’t ask what ‘friendly’ meant. He didn’t want to delve into that. She’d only known him, he had to remind himself of that.
“So you lived in the back room of a shoddy diner.” Fury was building. Social services hadn’t helped her. No one in that fucking town cared enough to help her.
“It was better than where I’d been. But I never blamed you. Ever.” She raised her head to look at him and licked her lips. “I blamed Cameron.”
“What? Why?” He stared at her, trying to absorb the fact that she didn’t blame him. Never had. Yet she blamed her brother?
“Because we both know it wasn’t an accident that killed him.”
He felt the blood drain from his face. “You were never supposed to know that.”
“I wasn’t supposed to know a lot of things. It’s funny how you guys thought you could keep me so innocent of everything. It was a sweet but hopeless cause.”
He didn’t know what to say. She was a smart girl, but they’d done their best to protect her. He thought he was the only one who realized what had really happened to Cam.
FUEL (DirtSlap Series Book 1) Page 11