by L. B. Reyes
I told Carter all about my intentions, and he quickly agreed to help me and get Nathan’s parents onboard with my idea. After everything Nathan had done for me, it was only fair that I did something significant for him too, though nothing would ever be enough. He’d been my friend for years, and now he was the man I wanted to share my life with. He’d stuck with me through thick and thin—through my never-ending breakdowns—and I knew deep in my heart he was in it for the long run.
It’s easy to be with someone when there are no problems and life is great. I knew our biggest tests would come unexpectedly, and I wanted to be ready for them. I hoped I was ready for them.
I’d learned from the coldness in my parents’ marriage I didn’t want that for myself. Their interactions were almost inexistent and a prime example of what a marriage should never be. I also knew Nathan was different from them. And I hoped I was too. I was willing to try my best for our relationship to work, and when he arrived later that night and made love to me again, I was reminded of why we couldn’t be wrong for one another.
This wasn’t just the beginning of a new year for us but also the beginning of a new stage in our lives. One in which we started over as a couple who would hopefully one day form a family. It wouldn’t be easy, life never was…but it would be worth it.
Of that, I didn’t have a single doubt.
Chapter 9
Evelyn
“I love you,” Nathan murmured as I straddled him, my hair falling over my shoulders.
I couldn’t find a hint of deceit in his eyes. “Me too, Nate. I’m so glad you get to spend the day here,” I replied with a small smile. My hands rested on his chest; this man was mine. No matter what, I knew our bond was one that would never be easily broken. The things we had been through had been rough, but now he was with me, and I was with him, and there was nothing tearing us apart.
Our relationship hadn’t started the conventional way; maybe it would have been best if we never started that way in the first place. However, I couldn’t bring myself to regret anything. I loved him, always would.
“I want to go back to school,” I confessed.
Nathan raised his eyebrows, but an amused glint lit his eyes. “Really? I thought you liked just ‘exploring the city?’”
I gently shoved him. “I love it, yes. But I need to do something, you know? I want to feel useful.”
Nodding, Nathan pressed a kiss on my lips. “I’d love to have you at the gallery all the time,” he said with a small smile. “But I don’t know if you would want that, especially with Jessica there.”
I frowned. “Wouldn’t that be unfair, though? Having me there because I’m your girlfriend? Besides, with Jessica there and our blossoming friendship, I don’t see how this could go wrong.”
Nathan snorted at my sarcasm, moving my hair back. “You are more than qualified. You led a company—”
“For like, a week,” I interrupted, ignoring the pain that still surfaced when I thought of those times.
“Still. You know about art. I could teach you more about the pieces we get in, and I’m sure Jessica would be willing to as well. I understand if you don’t want to, though, Evie. I won’t force you. The choice is yours, but the offer stands. If you don’t want to do that, then you can take care of the financial aspect; you’re good with numbers, we both know that, and Jesse and me, we’re up to our heads when it comes to that aspect.”
The idea seemed tempting. Very tempting. However, there were many things that stopped me. I didn’t want to feel like I hadn’t worked for the job, like it was another handout. Besides, I knew that being around Jessica and Nathan together could cause more problems.
But then again…
I’d be there.
“I’ll think about it,” I said.
“That’s all I’m asking for.” He smiled.
“Now,” I said, leaving his lap, “what do you want to do on your day off?”
A slow, teasing smirk formed on his lips. Immediately, I understood that I was what he wanted to do, and I began shaking my head, raising my hands to stop him as he stood and approached me.
“No, Nate. I’m tired, and sore and—”
“And you better start running before I get you,” he teased, stalking towards me with a smile.
“No, please.” I laughed. I couldn’t be serious with him, not when he was there, so playful and happy. All worries disappeared as I ran through the condo to my bedroom, trying to close the door behind me so he wouldn’t get to me.
I was too slow; he chuckled lowly, following behind me and wrapping his arm around me as he caught up.
“Too slow,” he murmured, latching his mouth to my neck without warning. What was supposed to be a complaint came out as a moan, and even without seeing him, I felt his lips quirk up to a devious smile.
“You’re like a horny…teenager,” I rasped, my eyes fluttering closed.
“Only with you.” He turned me around and claimed my lips without even giving me the chance to reply. I moaned into his mouth, consumed by him and all he caused within me as he lied me down on the bed. He knew exactly what to do to set both my mind and body on overdrive, and I loved it.
Just as he began removing his shirt, a phone started ringing. He groaned, clearly annoyed that someone dared interrupt the moment. I bit my lip, a little too riled up for my liking and frustrated at the thought that he would leave me in that state.
When the phone kept ringing, I covered my face with my hands, and Nathan picked up.
“Jesse,” he said, his tone clipped. “Yeah…kind of busy, actually…”
Nathan’s face took a regretful look, and he ran a hand through his already messy hair. Not a good sign.
“All right, I’ll be there in a bit…no, it’s fine…bye.”
I didn’t even give him a chance to speak up. “You have to leave, don’t you?”
“It looks like there’s a client interested in one of my pieces,” Nathan said with a forced smile.
The harsh glare I was giving him softened. That was a good thing; I wouldn’t ruin it for him. “Good,” I stated, truly proud of him. “Go. I’ll be right here when you get back.” I stood up, dragging a finger down his chest towards the bulge in his pants. He swallowed when I placed my hand over him.
“Maybe I can give you a bit of a congratulations when you get back home,” I whispered, nipping his earlobe.
“Shit,” he muttered, his eyes dark with desire. “I won’t be long.”
“I bet you won’t,” I replied with a smile.
“Stay here.”
***
I didn’t stay.
I wanted to know what was going on, so my brilliant mind decided that it was a good idea to visit Nathan’s apartment. Though he didn’t spend much time there, it was possible I could get some insight as to why he had been acting strange.
Did that make me a bad girlfriend?
Perhaps.
But I knew I wouldn’t have been doing that had it not been for his suspicious behavior.
Or maybe you’re just overreacting.
Hannah did always say I overreacted over everything, especially when I felt left out. Then again, when it came to Hannah, I was always an outsider. She always preferred her friends over me, to the point that my birthday parties, however small they were, were always full of her friends. And when we were old enough, she just wouldn’t show up to my little parties, no matter how much I wanted her there.
My chest tightened at the memories. It seemed some things would always hurt no matter how much time passed. To me she would always be my sister; we would always share the same blood even if our relationship was the worst. I didn’t hate her; I just hated our circumstances. Had my parents raised us, raised her a different way, our lives would be completely different.
But Hannah was who my mom raised her to be; my mom molded her to what she thought was a strong, powerful woman.
And now they were both in jail.
Oh, the irony.
E
ventually they would learn.
When I arrived at Nathan’s apartment complex, I braced myself for whatever it was that I would find. I was nervous, but I didn’t think I could find anything out of the ordinary. If that were the case, he wouldn’t risk leaving his keys around wherever I could get to them.
Once I got to his floor, I took out the keys and breathed deeply before even trying to open the door.
I wasn’t mentally prepared to hear the shower running.
I wasn’t emotionally prepared to see a purse lying on the sofa or a woman’s blazer on the floor.
Or the two glasses of wine.
Or the carelessly discarded skirt.
Or to hear the repeated moans coming from the restroom.
“Oh my God,” I whimpered, covering my mouth with my hand. This could not be happening to me.
This could not be happening to us.
Maybe I deserved it; he had been married when we first started our relationship. This couldn’t be anything other than karma. I rushed out, stepping over to the elevator, hoping it could carry me anywhere, as long as it was away from this evil nightmare I was living in.
Chapter 10
Evelyn
Stupid girl.
Stupid, naive little girl.
I sobbed as the cab drove me to my condo. I needed to get there and pack Nathan’s…shit. There was no reason for him to stay with me when he had an apartment to himself, where there was no need for him to be hiding the numerous women he was probably with. My hands trembled, and I could hardly even seem to keep my sobs quiet enough to not freak the cab driver out; I was too hurt.
Lying bastard.
Expert actor.
I love you.
The thought of his hands roaming another woman’s body while he was supposed to be only with me made me nauseous. But part of me wouldn’t believe it. He said he’d be at the gallery…God, he’d said so many things.
He wouldn’t do that to me.
He loves me.
It was an eternal drive. God, it seemed like the twenty minutes had turned to endless, suffocating hours. All I wanted to do was crawl into bed, forget about the moments I’d spent with him.
When the cab finally pulled up to my building, I rushed upstairs with unsteady legs and trembling hands, needing to be alone.
It was quiet, clean.
As if no one had been there at all during the whole day.
My chest ached.
It was my fault. That’s all I could think, all I could tell myself. He’d done this once…he could do it again. I cleared my throat, turning to my last resort. I took out my phone, calling him.
He didn’t pick up the first time.
Didn’t pick up the second.
On the third time, I was about to go to voicemail when his breathless voice met my ears.
“Hey, babe,” he said.
“Hey,” I replied, trying not to give anything away. “Are you still at the gallery?”
“Uh…yeah. I’m at the gallery, still with the possible buyer.” My heart dropped.
He was lying to me. I tried not to cry, to keep the pathetic sob inside, but it slipped past my lips.
“You okay, Evie?” he asked, concerned.
Fake concern.
Everything was fake.
“I’m fine. Do you know when you’ll be home?” I asked.
I needed to know in order to keep it together until then, to confront him. Tell him how much I hated him for this.
“Uh, I don’t know, baby. It’s taking a bit longer than I expected.”
Of course, it is.
And that’s when I heard it.
“I think you’ll like this one…oops.”
Jessica’s voice. I’d recognize it any time. There was a long pause, and then I heard a soft giggle in the background.
Nathan’s voice cut me off.
“Evie, I’ll call you when I’m on my way.”
With a quick goodbye, I hung up. I didn’t want to move, but by then I was nauseous at the thought of him being with her. I threw up until my weakened limbs could barely hold me up. Loving Nathan was so tiring.
I rinsed my mouth, staring back at the mirror at my pale appearance.
It shouldn’t have surprised me at all—he’d cheated on my sister with me.
He’d always cheat.
Once I finished putting myself together, I walked back into my bedroom—our bedroom—where the memories stared back at me. Where they mocked me…
How was I going to see him face to face?
How the hell would I confront him?
I let myself fall to the floor, crying into my hands despite trying to remain strong.
I’d known pain…betrayal. But when it comes from the single person you don’t ever expect it from…it’s too much to handle.
Thread by thread, stitch by stitch, my mended heart began to shatter, and all the pieces fell apart.
I should have never trusted him.
Should have never let him in.
And still, even with what I had been through, I decided that loving him was the right choice.
You deserve this for being so naive.
After a while of just staring off, my phone buzzed, getting my attention and bringing me out of my pained haze. I looked down, reading the words that would have made me very happy before.
Nathan: On my way home, baby.
Standing up, I wiped my away my tears, refusing to let him see me cry.
Not again.
***
I sat on the sofa, waiting patiently, tapping my foot on the floor while Nathan arrived. This part was easy; keeping it together in front of him would be the difficult part. Though the sadness was still there, now anger was starting to overshadow it.
I was angry at Nathan for lying to me, for being such a good damn actor to fool me into thinking that he was in love with me.
Faithful.
I scoffed at the thought of the word.
More than anything, though, I was angry at myself. Only someone as stupid as me could constantly get burned. There had to be something wrong with me for this to keep happening.
I heard the doorknob turn, and my heart stilled for that moment; for those few seconds, the last hours replayed in my mind. It took all my courage and strength to not feel anything, to not let the thoughts overwhelm me.
Stay strong.
He stepped foot into the condo and smiled when he saw me. Nathan held a bouquet of roses in his hands, extending them over to me.
“Surprise roses usually mean you’re apologizing for something,” I said, very matter of fact. He chuckled walking over to me on the couch. He placed a kiss on my forehead, lingering there for a moment and setting the roses on my lap.
“How did it go?” I asked, trying my best to keep his lips away from my own.
He knew me too well.
A single finger tilted my chin up.
“Have you been crying?” he asked, stroking right underneath my eye with his thumb. “Your eyes are swollen and red.”
“Allergies,” I breathed, afraid of speaking louder.
“You don’t have allergies.”
Allergic to your bullshit.
I cleared my throat, standing up and setting the roses on the sofa. “I ordered pizza. It’s on the table.”
He stopped me, taking hold of my arm. “What’s wrong, Evie?”
“Are you going to tell me how it really went?” I hissed, narrowing my eyes at him.
Nathan frowned, his lips pressing together. Clearly, it wasn’t something he wanted to talk about. Why was I even trying to get him to confess?
“Let me go,” I said, my voice breaking.
“Evelyn, what is going on with you?”
“What is going on with you? Lying to me, making me feel like an idiot?” I said, my tears spilling over. Nathan furrowed his brows, his gray orbs pained at the sight of me crying.
He let me go.
“Where were you?”
“I was with a clien
t, I—”
“Don’t lie. I know you weren’t there,” I yelled. Nathan swallowed.
Guilt.
That’s all I saw.
“Evie, I—”
“Unless you’re telling me the truth, don’t say anything to me,” I sobbed, turning around, determined to avoid any further confrontation.
Nathan had a different idea.
“Where do you think I was?” he questioned, his tone accusatory. Disappointed.
I tensed, not daring to take a step further.
“Answer me. What the fuck do you think I was doing?”
I raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to answer his own question. Why should I repeat what I already knew? Wouldn’t have that just been more painful for me? Why would he want to hurt me that way on top of everything I already knew?
“Jessica.”
Once again, he pressed his lips together. He seemed honestly confused, hurt even.
“Yes. I was with her.”
“Where?” I asked.
“At a cafe,” he replied.
“Are you sure?”
Scoffing, Nathan shook his head. “I can’t believe you’re pulling this shit,” he muttered.
“I can’t believe you.”
“Do you even want me here?” he asked, scratching the back of his head.
Yes.
No.
“Do what you want, Nathan. You always do anyways.”
Without expecting a reply, I walked to my room, lying down on the bed and trying to ignore a second bout of nausea. Everything was taking a toll on my body, and I was just so, so tired of everything. I wanted it all to go away.
I was so weak.
Hannah would be laughing at me if she knew.
Hell, she’d probably remind me how much I deserve this.
His footsteps carried out throughout the condo, and I tried to shut out the sound of him. What was he waiting for? I didn’t want him there anymore; he didn’t want me, so what did he want?
The answer became clear when, after a few minutes, the door to my bedroom creaked open. Unable to hold back, a ragged sob left my lips. I heard him sigh, but he made no attempt to touch me.