Damaged Goods

by Rena Marks

  Her sisters looked horrified and the table went silent. Kieran wondered at the comment that Alannah should know why, but before he could wonder much more, she spoke warningly.

  “Mother,” Alannah said.

  “Mother,” Cynthia sneered. “Quit your whining, Alannah. We do what we must for the sake of the family, do we not? I found you a handsome companion once before. Admittedly, it was easier with your own looks in check but that option is gone now. Besides, this time it is more important to find a provider instead of a companion. I’m sure their looks will grow on you. And surely they won’t mind your own atrocious features.” She calmly began to eat again as if nothing was wrong.

  And then they all began to eat as if life was totally normal.

  It was too much for Kieran. The recently-felt heat filled his form, making the fur on his body bristle. He began to pant, trying to cool himself down. He began to growl softly as he grew angrier.

  “It’s okay, sweetheart,” Alannah said softly. “Everything’s fine. We’re almost done with dinner and I’ll take you upstairs.”

  “Oh, for the love of Luna, this is why I never wanted pets in the house,” Cynthia said, tossing her napkin on the table.

  Kieran’s vision filled with red and his growl grew louder.

  “Okay, that’s enough, baby. I’ll take you upstairs.” Alannah tugged his neck.

  “Is he your therapy or are you his?” Cynthia asked, her eyebrows rising to greet her hairline.

  “We’re each other’s therapy,” Alannah said, but then she did something surprising. She grabbed his snarling jaw and twisted his face to look into her eyes to talk to him directly. “We’re each other’s therapy, Kieran. I’m yours. You’re mine. Come on. I’ll take you upstairs and we can have solitude for the rest of the night.”

  To change. Her thoughts came across clear in his mind, surprising him. She was right. His nerve endings were on fire with wanting to change. He couldn’t control the feelings any more.

  “Yes, take care, my dear,” Vien said.

  Kieran snapped his gaze to him, wondering if he was the one who Alannah would pick. Then he was being pushed from the room and toward the stairs.

  When she finally closed the door behind him, he was almost rabid with the need to change. His eyes were wild, flitting around the room to find a quiet corner to shift.

  “Don’t hide from me,” she said softly and crossed her legs underneath her as she sat down across from him.

  Chapter Twelve

  HIS SHIFT WAS AS harsh as it had been earlier. She wanted to wince at the sound of the cracking bones and elongating muscles, but she didn’t dare. She wanted to be there for him, be his anchor. His rock.

  She didn’t think he’d need to change so often but it was obvious from the scene in the dining room that he’d lost all control. He was so out of it he couldn’t even communicate with her mentally. When the change was finally over, she laid down on her side facing him while he lay on his side. His breathing was harsh as he recovered his breath.

  “Okay?” she asked, reaching out to smooth a lock of hair from his forehead. He flinched slightly and averted his face to the shadows, but let her touch him.

  “Better now.” His voice was low and gravelly.

  “Your changes are definitely tied to your moods,” she said.

  “I couldn’t take it anymore. They don’t even treat you like their family member.”

  She shrugged. “It doesn’t bother me. I’m used to it.”

  “You shouldn’t be. You’re magnificent. Your family should know and appreciate that.”

  “What’s really going on?” she whispered.

  “I—nothing. Nothing really.”

  “I can tell you the exact moment you started to bristle,” she said softly. “It was when my mother decided I should make a choice between Vien and Potierre.”

  His voice was werewolf deep when he answered. “Can you blame me?”

  “There’s no chance of a choice between them, Kieran.”

  “I’m not your sponsor, Alannah. As easily as that, my choice to have you was taken away.”

  “You can be.”

  He looked startled as if he’d never thought of that. “My den is a dump. It’s nowhere as nice as this.” He sat up abruptly. “Now that I know you, I can’t offer you this.”

  “So?”

  “You’re used to a certain way of life I can’t provide. I—I can’t drag you through the mud. You deserve finery. You deserve that balcony that’s attached to your bedroom so the sun can kiss your beautiful face each morning. You deserve two men who have studied your culture and who make you feel at home. You deserve so much more than I can give you and I see that now.”

  She stopped him with a finger over his lips. “Just love me, Kieran. That’s all I ask. Love me.”

  He caught her to him in one move. “I can’t love you. You deserve better than worthless love. I don’t know what you see in me, princess.”

  “A bad-boy shape shifter?”

  It was the wrong answer. He set her aside from him. “I’m just bad. I’m the one who works the prison. I’m the one who scares hardcore prisoners shitless.” He turned to the side, giving her the view of his profile.

  Ripples and ripples of thick corded muscle. Raw, primal strength. Powerful. He was so luscious and he didn’t even know it.

  “We need to learn how to control your moods.” It was his mood that caused this shift, because he couldn’t stand the way they were treating her. He did love her. He just didn’t know it.

  “Vien and Potierre left you some clothes,” she said quietly. He stood, so she got up also, going to a drawer to lift out the folded garments.

  Then she leaned back to watch. She didn’t care about the crap he was spouting about not deserving her. Because usually, when he was around her, he desired her.

  Unable to help herself, her eyes shot downward to check his cock. Semi-hard. He wasn’t as off put by her as he pretended.

  “Are you checking out my dick?” he asked, incredulous.

  “I would never, kind sir.” She curtsied, then pursed her lips in the hoity-toity, Iota Nine way. But then she gave in and licked them hungrily.

  “Fuck,” he growled and his dick hardened all the way.

  She dropped to her knees in front of him. He was about to protest when her tongue lashed out against his balls. His hand tangled through her hair. “You should never be on your knees. You’re too good for me, princess.”

  “Yes, I can see that.” She was on her knees licking his balls, after all. Her tongue swiped out again.

  “Did you not hear a word I said about being too good for me?”

  “I heard.”

  “Alannah—” he hissed.

  “You will let me and you’ll enjoy it,” she said firmly.

  He groaned when she took him into her mouth, laving him with her tongue. The sounds he made were so sexy that she knew, right then and there, that she was going to make him love her.

  She sucked him down as far as he would go and cupped his heavy testicles with her hand, massaging them gently. His hips pressed gently against her like he couldn’t control himself.

  “Stop,” he gritted, pulling away from her. “I can’t take anymore.”

  He hoisted her up against him, naked flesh to naked flesh. Her body was on fire from his touch. Every nerve ending was exploding with pleasure as he carried her to the bed. He reverently cupped her breast, then slid his hand along her skin and gripped her hips. His lips were urgent as he kissed down to her stomach.

  “I need to taste you, too. Please,” he gritted, looking up at her. “Need.” The one word was agonized.

  No man had ever made her feel like this before. She wanted him just the way he was. The way he looked at her, touched her, and craved her. Even though he fought it, thought he wasn’t good enough. She understood. Something inside her had always told her she wasn’t good enough for others also.

  She nodded.

  All she could d
o was lay back and watch him adore her body. Kieran shoved her knees farther apart. Her instinct was to clamp them closed, especially with what she’d gone through with Wilson, but with him, she didn’t want to. She wanted him to see everything about her, and she wanted to see everything about him, too.

  With a start she realized, she loved him. She watched his head descend toward her.

  “Kieran,” she moaned, gripping his hair when his lips touched her inner thigh. She gripped his hair harder and guided him. There was that sexy sound rumbling in his throat—the one that said he wasn’t completely human.

  Kieran gripped her hips to hold her still, and pushed his tongue into her. Instant flames rocked through her midsection. Alannah threw her head back and cried out as he slid into her again. Rocking her hips, she showed him how she liked it, and he responded perfectly, easing her into a good rhythm that was pushing her closer to release so fast, all she could do was feel.

  She was close, so close—moving with him. Reaching with him. Letting him adore her. And then it was there, coiled, waiting to spring.

  He moved up and sucked on her clit. It snapped like a rubber-band.

  “Oooh,” she hissed as her body shattered. Waves of explosions broke, cresting over her arms and legs, making her shake and rock. The pleasure was inescapable.

  She thought he would enter her right away. Plunge into her to feel her throbbing release for himself. His body was still humming with tension, every muscle rigid as he crawled up. But when he kissed her, something had changed.

  He was in control.

  Kieran sipped at her lips gently, only brushing his tongue shallowly into her mouth every so often. He ran his hands down her ribs, down the curve of her waist, and around the swell of her hips. He opened his hand and ran his palm down the outside of her arm to her hand and intertwined their fingers, but still, he didn’t lower his hips to hers. The fire inside of her calmed along with her fading aftershocks, but was replaced by something more. He was building up her need for him again, but the edge of desperation wasn’t there anymore. Now, he was adoring her, and as he pulled her hand to his chest and pressed the flat of her palm onto the crease between his hard pecs, she realized he was asking her to adore him, too. She’d love to, if she didn’t feel a sense of finality with him.

  Her eyes prickled with tears. He deserved love and he just didn’t think he was worthy of it. So she couldn’t tell him because he wouldn’t believe her love for him was real. He’d give her the world but he wouldn’t allow her to lower herself to him. He had no idea he was her world.

  “Come here,” he murmured against her lips, and then eased off her and sat back against the wall. Alannah hesitated for a moment. In this dim light, his amber eyes shined oddly, but his expression was soft. Loving. As if he’d gotten what he wanted. Her satisfaction.

  He really wasn’t going to satisfy himself. He honestly believed he would please her and ignore his own needs. Silly, crazy wolf.

  Alannah crawled to him and straddled his lap. She cupped his cheeks and let his unkempt beard rasp against the palms of her hands before she slipped her arms around his shoulders and hugged him.

  Kieran let off a shuddering breath and slid his hands up her back. And then he held her, rocked her gently from side to side, and buried his face against her neck. Sure, his erection was still rigid against her sex, but he wasn’t doing anything about it. He seemed content to just be in her arms.

  “I don’t want to take you rough,” he said, his voice low.

  Why she could only imagine, but she could feel the worry emanating from him. The shame. He’d closed off his mind so she couldn’t read his human thoughts. This had to do with his harsh change—the fact that he couldn’t control his emotions. The fact that he felt he would never be good enough for her.

  Desperate to make him okay again, to fix the sadness, she lifted off his lap, then slid over him slowly until he was buried deep inside of her. He froze, his breath still.

  Now it was Kieran who arched his head back, eyes on her, but his groan rumbled softly. Tomorrow, they’d talk. She’d convince him to stop pushing her away. But tonight, she was going to love him and show him it was okay to be whatever he was. That he was enough for her.

  Kieran tensed as she rolled her hips against him, riding him slowly. He might have looked away if not for her hand gripping the back of his neck, forcing his eyes on hers.

  Kieran’s grip on her waist dug in harder, and his eyes blazed. It was the ultimate let-in. A snarl rattled his throat, louder than he’d allowed before, so Alannah grinned at him. Good Kieran, enjoying himself finally, letting his control slip, but only for her in this moment.

  “Damn you,” he ground out. He pushed off the wall and kissed her hard. His tongue plundered her mouth. It set her middle on fire as they moved together. His cock and his tongue, both coming at her. He had no idea what he did to her, but she couldn’t stop moving against him. Kieran’s hand was gently gripping the back of her hair, and he was rocking against her, meeting each roll of her hips, and she was close. So close, she burned with the need. She needed to come.

  “Go ahead,” he promised. “I’ll take care of you.”

  “I need you to come with me. Make me feel whole. Complete.”

  He was pushing so deeply into her now, his eyes intense as he gritted his teeth and watched her, as if searching for any sign she’d want to stop. His body was shaking. Kieran was close, too, and she loved this. Loved being in his arms, his body inside hers.

  Pressure built deep in her middle, and she cried out with every thrust as he pulled her down on his cock.

  He knew exactly when it hit. He snarled and gripped the back of her neck, rested her forehead against his as she broke apart, her orgasm pulsing throughout her body. Kieran rammed into her and gritted out her name as he shot warm, wet fluid into her. Over and over, he throbbed inside of her, filling her. He huffed a shaky breath and pulled her tight against him and she locked her legs around his hips. And as their aftershocks slowed, he didn’t move. He sat there frozen, holding her, breath quick, body tense. Waiting for her reaction.

  “Give me one day, Kieran.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “For one day, pretend you’re mine and I’m yours.”

  Kieran’s lips turned up into a lopsided smile in the moment before his lips collided with hers.

  Chapter Thirteen

  SHE WOKE IN HIS arms and it felt perfect. If only the outside world wouldn’t intrude. As if he sensed her wakefulness, he kissed the top of her head and spoke. She twisted to sit up and face him.

  “Vien sent a message. Your mother is feeling under the weather today and will spend alone time in her room. He is taking Ana out for the day to show her around Xenia. Potierre has Danielle. Robyn has placed a DNA activated force field on the upper wing of your quarters. Your mother won’t be able to have access up here. We’ll spend the day together until your sisters get here to get ready for the party.” He had a far-away look in his eyes.

  “Good.” She intended to fully make him love her and never want to let her go. This was her chance.

  He rolled over her. “He also said he left a tray of breakfast outside your door. Not to let your pet wolf eat it all.”

  “My wolf can eat anything he wants.” She waggled her eyebrows expressively.

  “If everyone’s out and about—I thought maybe I’d take you out to see one place in Xenia? Before you’re too exhausted to do anything later. You’ll have to rest before the party, you know.”

  Damn anemia. She hadn’t factored in her rests and that was going to cut into the time frame of seducing Kieran until he could refuse her no more.

  “I can be tired at the party,” she whispered. “Sitting there is fine, watching everyone around me have fun.”

  “The party’s for you,” he growled.

  “Just being with you is all I need.”

  He didn’t respond and she had a sinking suspicion he wouldn’t be attending the party. He’d planned to skip out. Was it bec
ause the other Xeno Sapiens would be there?

  But he slipped out of bed to go get the tray of food in the hallway.

  He carried it back to bed and crawled in with her and she realized, in this moment, life was perfect.

  A basket of bread—croissants, bagels, muffins with assorted butter and jam. There were omelets, bacon, and sausage.

  “Vien and Potierre assumed you’d still be in human form,” she teased.

  “They’re bedroom is down the hall,” he winked, then laughed when her mouth fell open.

  “I think we were quiet. Do you think we were quiet?”

  “Probably.” But the tone in his voice said otherwise.

  “I’m glad their guest rooms are downstairs,” she said. “Vien told me that normally he takes the suite of rooms upstairs and Potierre takes the downstairs rooms. But they were so excited to have guests they were scrambling to get us in. They wanted to be nearby when I came in, so Potierre moved upstairs. Which worked out when my family got here.”

  “Sounds like an awful lot of work to me,” Kieran said.

  “They may not do it again when my mother leaves.”

  She noticed he was picking over the bacon for the sausage. She pushed hers to the side of her plate. “Trade?”

  He smiled easily, spearing her sausage with his fork from her plate. Her heart did a little flip when he picked up a piece of his bacon and brought it to her mouth. Why couldn’t he see what he did to her? As long as she lived, she’d never feel about another man the way she did about Kieran. She buttered a small roll for him and added a bit of jam. “Try this.”

  “Strawberry?” he asked, chewing thoughtfully.

  “My favorite.”

  “Mine, too,” he said, bringing her finger to his lips to suck clean of the bit still there. If she didn’t think he’d run, she’d tell him then and there that he had her heart.

  She pushed her plate away when she was done, content to watch him finish the rest.