Indelible Love Jake's Story

by D. W. Cee

  Nine courses of fine food, an intimate talk with my love, a meeting with Thomas Keller, and a kitchen tour later, we drove back down to the city. Without any explanation, I took her to our apartment near the Ferry building and hoped to rest before starting the next half of our day.

  Emily had a bewildered stare and wondered where we were. Since she told me she didn’t like surprises, I’d have to continue surprising her till she got used to it – at least for the rest of our lives together. When I opened the door to our apartment, Emily walked in and studied the place silently. Ending the surprise, I explained that this apartment belonged to our family and that we were here to rest before dinner and the show.

  “Dinner? Show? How can you eat again after French Laundry?” She shook her head no. “There’s no way I can eat again today. I am so full. Besides, I have nothing to wear to attend any shows up here. What are we going to watch?”

  She looked stunning in her dress but I knew Jane had gone out and picked out something nice for her. I wanted to delight her again. We both headed to the sofa hoping to hang out for a few hours. Relaxing in front of the TV and maybe even taking a nap sounded like the perfect remedy to all our libations.

  I brought her as close to me as possible and next thing I knew she was dead asleep against my arms. Carefully, I laid her with me on the large sofa. She was nestled between me and the back of the sofa. My arms cradled her neck and she used my chest as a pillow. This was how I imagined our life to be – a lazy nap together on a weekend afternoon. With both my arms curled around her body, I dozed off with her.

  Happily I woke up to Emily’s arm sprawled across my chest. She slept like an angel – my angel – while my lips grazed the top of her head and my hand worked the remote.

  “Oh, my gosh.” She awoke sooner than I would have liked. “How long have I been asleep?”

  “A couple of hours I think.”

  “I’m so sorry, Jake. I can’t believe I fell asleep on you. I don’t think I’ve ever fallen asleep on a date before.”

  “It was nice. I rather liked it. You appeared quite cozy.” I kissed her again and wrapped both my arms around her tight.

  “Um… I didn’t drool on you, did I?”

  Her face turned a cute shade of red. “Do you normally?” I asked laughing at her flustered look.

  “I don’t think so but of course the first time I fall asleep with a man, I would make a fool of myself.”

  I pondered her statement. What could she have meant about this being the first time she fell asleep with a guy? She broke my thought by trying to get up and get away from me.

  There was no way we were changing this perfect position. Instead, I pulled her body up to my eyes. Not aware whose lips reached first, they joined excitedly together. She had wanted this as much as I had. Excited to share in an embrace, I couldn’t keep my mouth in one place. There were too many parts of her body I wanted to explore but with the position that we were in I couldn’t reach beyond her face and neck. She responded to my every touch.

  Right as I was about to get up and carry her into my room, there was a knock on the door that was far worse than any pager. I got up and opened the door to the doorman delivering all of Emily’s clothes for tonight. Perusing through the stack, Jane had done a nice job.

  “What’s all this?” Emily looked through the rolling rack. “How did this all get here?”

  “Jane’s in San Francisco right now and she helped me. She offered to go out and get all this for you. I hope you don’t mind. Jane’s the only girl in the family and she’s always wanted a sister. She’s more than excited to meet you and become your friend. Is that okay?”

  “Jane, your sister? Oh, I can’t wait to meet her!” She had that child like excitement on her face and in her voice.

  “Jane is quite an opera buff and I remembered you talking about Carmen. So Jane helped out again and got us seats at the opera house and that’s the final half of our date. We are meeting her for dinner so you have to eat again.”

  Her face turned into one of sincere appreciation. I’d never seen such tenderness in her eyes before. Something I just said or did made her look at me like I was her answer to love. I didn’t know what I had done but I enjoyed the admiration.

  “Jake, this has been one of the most amazing dates. Lunch was a gastronomic feast. Meeting the chef owner was almost as phenomenal as lunch and I’m really touched you figured out how much I like opera. I guess you do listen during our dates even though they’re always cut short. You are an amazing man.” She came to me and put her arms around my body.

  “I love you, Emily,” was on the tip of my tongue but I held off just a bit longer.

  She and I both went into separate rooms and got dressed for dinner. I got out before Emily, waiting with one more surprise. Finally, this was our time to commit to one another. I did fear Emily’s response to the ring but I knew today we had made huge progress. I held in my hand a box – like the kind a girl would receive when a man was down on one knee about to propose to the woman he loved. This was a tempting thought. I didn’t think she would agree to marriage – yet.

  Emily walked out looking dazzling in a formal gown. She curiously eyed my hand.

  “I want to ask you something,” I started my thought process with these words. “This is for you.” I opened up her hand and placed the box. “Please don’t be scared. It’s not as serious as it looks.”

  She did look scared. Carefully unwrapping the bow and opening the box she looked back and forth between the ring and my face. “Um… it’s stunning but could you explain this ring to me?”

  Maybe a quarter inch band with hundreds of diamonds was a bit serious when asking her to be my girlfriend? I just hoped it would fit on one of her fingers.

  “Okay… it’s not an engagement ring, I wish it were, though I’d probably buy a bigger diamond if I were proposing, nor a wedding band as you might fear. I wanted to give you a ring that symbolized our commitment to one another.” I didn’t like the way that sounded. I deleted that statement and held her hands. “Emily, we’ve dated a couple of months now and I know you’re not quite sure where we stand in the formal sense. This talk is long overdue. I actually bought this ring for you after our first date. Even back then, I knew I wanted to be with you. I mean, date only you.” I babbled a few more incoherent thoughts then got straight to the point. “Um… I would like for us to date… exclusively date. What I mean is… Will you be my girlfriend?” This was a lot harder to ask than originally thought.

  Emily eyed me curiously then giggled. I couldn’t believe I had a ring in my hand, a serious question of commitment out of my mouth and all she could do was giggle.

  “Are you going to answer? You’re making me nervous.”

  “Okay, so let me get this straight. You spend thousands of dollars to ask my permission to do what we are already doing now? Dating?” Now that she put it this way, the ring did seem a little over the top.

  I reminded her that she was the one who needed clarity and a title to what we were doing.

  “Aren’t we already exclusively dating? Have you been seeing other girls as well? Is that why it’s so hard to spend any time with you?” This joke I didn’t get nor want to laugh at. She saw the annoyance on my face.

  “I haven’t had a desire or need to see anyone else. I feel blessed to be with you.” She reassured me. “I trust you and feel most secure when we’re together. You are the only man I want to be with.” These choice words melted my heart.

  “What about Max?” I needed an answer to clear my doubts once and for all.

  As much as I appreciated her words, I thought about the two of them last night and felt insecure again. Could there be a possibility she would want to get back together with him again? Like she had said earlier, four years was hard to erase. She studied my face again and knew she needed to reassure me even more.

  “I’m sorry you had to witness my first encounter with Max and his new girlfriend. Being such an awkward moment, I didn�
�t react the way I would have liked. I guess it hurt me more than I thought it would, even with you by my side.”

  This was not what I wanted to hear but she continued anyway. “But you and our relationship add so much joy to my life. I wasn’t lying when I said you’re the only person who makes me feel entirely comfortable. I’m elated when we’re together and lonely when we’re apart. Will this answer do? I would be honored to be your girlfriend.”

  The second half of her statement definitely made up for the first half. I contemplated telling her how much I loved her. Not wanting anything close to a rejection after her confession just now, I decided to wait, again.

  Jane and Emily needed no introduction when they met at Quince. They instantly bonded. They began their conversation talking about New York. I didn’t realize how much Emily liked New York. She told Jane she wished she’d lived there at some point in her life. This was also something I’d have to try and do for her.

  “Jake was so miserable when you were in New York.” Jane started talking about me. Emily smiled and squeezed my hand. “You should have seen him at Thanksgiving. We were all seated at a large table and we noticed Jake constantly looking down at his lap. Finally, Uncle Henry went over and grabbed what was in his lap – his phone, of course – and took it away from him. It drove him nuts that he was texting you but you wouldn’t respond.

  “Well, by the time you all sat down for dinner, we were towards the end of ours and Sarah’s grandma was telling us stories of her childhood. I couldn’t get up from the table nor could I text in secret so I didn’t respond. I got so many texts Sarah, my best friend, was really annoyed. She told me to go back home if we were constantly going to be on the phone with each other.”

  “Yeah, well Jake got into trouble with Uncle Henry but he didn’t care. He got his phone back and kept waiting for your response.”

  “In all honesty, I was pretty miserable too. Apparently Sarah and her boyfriend Charlie had a bet going that week.” From the insane kiss she gave me at the airport, miserable was an understatement.

  “Really? What bet was that?” I jumped into their conversation.

  “Sarah believed I would come crying, begging to go home because I missed you. And Charlie believed I would feel too guilty to say so but instead, you would come to see me in New York.”

  “So who won the bet?” Jane asked. “Who was more correct?”

  “That’s hard to say. Sarah was right because that’s exactly what I wanted to do but Charlie was also correct knowing I couldn’t do that to my best friend. Also, if I hadn’t stopped him, your brother would have spent Thanksgiving with us in New Jersey. I guess they both know me too well.”

  After today and Emily’s many confessions, I felt like I knew her quite well. She appeared comfortable talking about her feelings concerning me as well as her past feelings concerning Max. We had made huge progress today as I had hoped.

  “The whole family can’t wait to meet you,” Jane said rolling her eyes. “Jake couldn’t stop talking about you at Thanksgiving. Supposedly he did the same at Uncle Dave’s birthday, one day after meeting you.”

  “I’m nervous I’ll disappoint. I think Jake’s gone around telling too many exaggerated stories.”

  “I have not,” I said. “The family’s only expecting the most beautiful and gracious woman, which would be you.”

  “Great!” This time Emily rolled her eyes. “Now I’ll absolutely disappoint.

  Unnecessarily, Jane retold many stories about me and Kelley and she started telling Emily about my temperament. Like a typical younger sister, she only explained the bad side of her older brother. Emily joined in her bandwagon and complained about me being a workaholic. Jane had asked her what she liked about me and Emily was being coy with her answer.

  “Tell her, Emi,” I encouraged.

  Her eyes glowed when she finally professed. “Jake has this amazing way of making me feel like I’m the only person in this world who matters to him. I feel incredibly special. Not only is he attentive, he’s a caring and loving person.”

  She got it! That’s exactly how I felt about her and how I’d wanted her to feel. She was the one who mattered to me. Leaning over to kiss her I whispered, “That’s how I want you to feel, always.”

  “Thank you. I do,” she responded with her own embrace.

  Then I explained what I loved about my Emily. There weren’t too many things I didn’t love about her but Jane reminded me we only had so much time before the opera started.

  “If I had to sum up what I love most about Emily, it would be her honesty. Even though she knows it’s not to her benefit, she’ll still tell you what’s in her heart. I know way too much about her last relationship.” I shook my head in displeasure.

  Emily looked mildly alarmed. “Was my honesty at lunch not to my benefit? Am I in trouble?”

  It never ceased to amaze me how easily I could make her feel loved and anxious all within the same breath. Even after today, my girlfriend still couldn’t convince herself that I cared for her deeply. Once again I reassured her.

  “I appreciate your honesty whether or not I appreciate your answers.”

  Jane asked many questions about how we met and I went into our long story of the first night at the ER and the next two days we spent together.

  “By the way, why are you guys going back down tonight? Jake, didn’t you ask Emily if she wanted to stay the weekend?” Jane posed a question that earned her whatever she wanted for Christmas. She turned to Emily, “You should stay with us in the apartment and go down tomorrow night. We could spend another day together. Are you uncomfortable with me being in the apartment? Do you want to be alone with Jake?”

  I remained quiet and deferred all answers to Emily. Tongue tied and flustered, Emily paused… turned to me for help – I didn’t help at all – then answered Jane. “Oh, no, Jane… I don’t feel uncomfortable with you. Jake didn’t fully explain what was happening today.”

  “Then you’ll stay the night?” Jane sounded excited, but not nearly as excited as I was at the prospect of spending a night with Emily.

  “I’d love that Jane,” Emily relented.

  Reaching over to hold Emily’s hand, she appeared nervous and in deep thought about something. I just tried to hold back my humongous smile relishing spending two full days plus a night with my girlfriend.

  “So Jake, anything else you want to tell me about Emily?” Jane startled the both of us.

  Emily excused herself to go to the restroom and I hugged and kissed my sister. She pushed me away with a disgusted look.

  “What was that for?”

  “That was my way of thanking you for getting Emily to stay the night. I asked her on Friday and she flat out turned me down. What do you want for Christmas? I’ll get you whatever you ask for.” My grin traveled from ear to ear.

  “You’re so lame! I didn’t do it for you. I want to get to know my future sister. I did it for me.”

  “You could see her as a part of our family too, huh? Isn’t she fantastic?”

  “Yeah, she’s pretty great. She’s so genuine and kind and very charming. I don’t know why she likes someone as selfish as you.”

  “That’s not all she is. Let me tell you some other qualities you don’t know about my Emily. I love her strength. I’ve never met any girl who is such a survivor. She’s been on her own since high school, put herself through college, and then bought and created a home all by herself. She has worked for everything she has. Nothing has been handed to her. And yet she smiles and enjoys life. Her attitude is amazing.”

  From the corner of my eyes, I saw Emily stop, waiting for me to finish, but also listening to what I had to say. Her once flustered composure turned dreamy and I could see her lips curling the way only she could smile. I continued with a vow just loud enough so she could finally understand how much I loved her.

  “But as strong as she appears she’s terribly tenderhearted. I think this is what makes me so enamored with her. She hurts easily
, cries readily, but loves deeply. She makes me want to care for her and shelter her from anything that may harm her. I’ve never felt such a strong desire to protect someone as I do for Emily.”

  “Wow, Jake. I didn’t know you had it in you to love anyone so selflessly. I’m impressed and shocked. You’re not the Jake Reid I grew up with. Maybe Emily forced you to grow up,” Jane chuckled.

  Emily chose to ride with Jane over to the Opera House only on the condition she would ride home with me. They were going to stop by some of the stores in Union Square to pick up bare necessities for the overnight. In the meanwhile I got to the venue early and thought about renting binoculars when I saw these cool binoculars with built-in extendable handles for sale. I purchased one for Emily and after a second thought, Jane, too.

  Sitting and waiting patiently in the box, a pair of hands covered my eyes and whispered, “Guess who?”

  Always playful, I matched her surprise by grappling her arms around my side and pulling her onto my lap. My lips instantaneously landed on hers to stop her loud whoop from disturbing others in their boxes. Jane made some cheeky comment but smiled watching us have fun. Emily pulled away the second I let go of my grip.

  “How many times do I need to tell you I don’t like PDA? It’s embarrassing!” she whispered, moving to her seat.

  I put my arms around her as she sat down and leaned into her ear. “Okay. We’ll continue when we get home.” I felt her body stiffen as I gave her one last kiss on the back of her neck.

  Several times during the opera I looked over at my love to see her engrossed in the performance. When we got back to LA, I’d have to look into getting season tickets to the opera. Mesmerized and moved by the show, I waited for the tears but surprisingly, there were none. No different than the supermarket, she had no idea I was watching her more than I watched the show. Jane glanced over at us a few times and gave me an encouraging smile.