Her Secret Twins

by Janette Foreman

  No way could she handle a list of repairs right now just because Grant had decided he didn’t want to stay in town.

  Then again, she reminded herself she didn’t need to repair things right now, because Grant wasn’t going to be here that long. Obviously longer than she’d thought, but not for forever.

  Grant shifted Peter higher in his arms, but the poor boy wasn’t interested in staying with him. Grant set him on the floor and let him toddle into the living room. Kallie wrinkled her nose. “I haven’t had a chance to clean that carpet.”

  “He should be fine, right?”

  She eyed Grant, not amused. He seemed to get the message and picked Peter up again. They moved out to the porch and let the kids down to look around. A faint breeze whispered in the cottonwoods nearby, intermingling with the distant song of sparrows and finches. Kallie longed to relax into it, but how could she when Grant rattled her?

  “So...” Breaking the silence, his voice came quietly as they stared over the expanse of prairie and trees. “When’s their birthday?”

  “May third,” she said.

  “What are their full names?”

  “Peter Allen and Ainsley Elise.”

  “When did they take their first steps?”

  Her heart began to tug. “Eleven months.”

  “First words?” His voice sounded gravelly this time, and a burn started behind Kallie’s eyes.

  “Ainsley says ‘Mama,’ but Peter hasn’t said anything discernible yet.”

  “Well, soon, they’ll learn ‘Daddy,’ too.”

  Kallie closed her eyes. “It takes a while for them to learn new words at this stage, Grant.”

  “I don’t mind.”

  “How long are you planning to stay, exactly?”

  “Oh, I’m not leaving.” He matched her stare. “I just found out I’m a dad to twins. You couldn’t drag me out of here with a crowbar and a winch.” He turned to face her full on. “And another thing. I’ve decided to keep my half of the inheritance. I’m planning to pay child support, and I’m getting a paternity test and seeking joint custody.”

  “Are you serious?”

  “Dead serious.”

  Fear rippled through her, the surety of his list shaking her foundation. Everything she knew was changing so fast. Too fast. Turning on her heel, she scooped up the children, then marched down the porch steps and deposited them inside the stroller.

  Her hands shook as she tried to secure their harnesses. Grant’s boot falls sounded behind her.

  “You can’t hide from this, Kal.” This time, his voice was soft yet firm. “We’re going to have to talk about things like custody at some point.”

  She whirled toward him. “Don’t you dare take my children away from me!”

  His gaze narrowed. “They’re our children, and who said anything about taking them away? I’m staying right here on the farm, remember?”

  Yes, she remembered. But how long until his wanderlust got the better of him and he decided to take off? He was only here for the kids, not for her. There was nothing keeping him on the farm. “What about your job in Iowa? I thought you loved it.”

  “I do.” He shrugged. “I’ll try working it from here for a while, see what happens. I’ll figure something out.” His sobering gaze met hers. “I’m not taking them out of your life. It’s not right for them to grow up without a dad, but it’s also not right to be without a mom. We need to be serious about coparenting and somehow making this family thing work.”

  Family? Kallie’s mouth ran dry. How could they possibly become something like that?

  “Okay, Kal? You’re going to have to trust me on this.”

  What could she say? Nothing made sense in her jostled thoughts. She said good-night and pushed the kids back toward her house. Because the truth was, she had trusted him to stick around—after he’d asked her to marry him. He’d broken that trust. And with it, her heart.

  The stroller’s wheels crunched softly over the gravel in an otherwise soundless evening, the moon high overhead. Any summer night that she came outside and saw the moon positioned here, she thought about Grant. Counting stars in his truck bed and eating s’mores around homemade campfires. Talking about life, love and the future. So many good memories under that moon. So many slipups, too. Two flawed human beings trying to forge ahead into a marriage when they’d had no idea how to do so effectively.

  And now he was planning to stay on the farm. For the foreseeable future. For the kids.

  She should be happy about that. Relieved. She’d been so scared that he would reject Ainsley and Peter, but he’d actually done the opposite. He’d embraced them, jumped in full force.

  So why did she feel uneasy about it?

  She knew why. She was worried he wouldn’t stick to his devotion. That he’d prove her right and be discovered as untrustworthy. Of course, Kallie wasn’t innocent in this whole situation either, but all the same, she wasn’t sure she’d ever fully trust Grant again, no matter what.

  Kallie glanced upward again, searching the darkening sky for a moment of clarity. Lord, help me know what to do now.

  Chapter Three

  The early-morning sun peeked through Grant’s broken window shades as he sat on his bed, staring at his laptop. He flipped through photo after photo, pausing on each one, trying to soak in each detail of the precious lives he’d missed.

  Last night, he’d called Kallie and asked her to email over as many pictures as she could of the kids, from ultrasounds to this week. She surprised him by saying she already had most of them on a couple of flash drives. He swung by to pick them up, then sat and examined each one into the wee hours. He couldn’t bring himself to stop until he’d reached the last photo. And here he was, waking early to look at them again.

  His kids. They were perfect. Beautiful. Amazing. His own flesh and blood. So many words and yet none of them quite did Peter and Ainsley justice.

  The early pictures were mostly of the kids sleeping, wearing cute outfits that were too big for them. Hard not to be—they were so tiny. Even their skin was too big for them. All those wrinkled rolls on their skinny arms and legs. Grant chuckled, his heart bursting with fierce love and pride he hadn’t known was possible.

  May 3 was their birthday. What had he been doing last year on that day?

  Out of curiosity, he checked his calendar. He’d been preparing for a clinic, about to train a bunch of bird dogs and offer demonstrations in Kansas that coming weekend. Some of his favorite clients. He remembered that whole weekend pretty well, actually.

  His kids had been coming into the world at that very moment. How crazy was that?

  And how sad. The loss he felt over missing that day, that week in the hospital, and bringing them home ached inside his chest. He had no way of getting those days back. He’d tried to understand. Tried not worrying about it. What was done was done. But why had she kept them from him?

  He had to make sure he made the most of every day from now on.

  When he reached the final photo again, he shut down his computer and got up for the day. He padded to the kitchen and dug a plastic scoop into the large bag of dog food he’d leaned against a cabinet.

  “Chief. Bella.”

  The dogs scurried in from their sleeping spots in Grant’s room, each eagerly awaiting the food as he poured it into their bowls.

  He put away the scoop, then reached for the to-do list he’d created last night before calling Kallie about the photos. There was a lot to get done, so he anticipated a very busy day spent contacting people.

  At the cottage’s tiny, round kitchen table, he perused his list. Sign up for life insurance and name the kids as beneficiaries. Reroute more of his paycheck to his 401K. Contact Craig Preston, the president of the Helping Hands board, and discuss remote work options.

  He paused on the final bulleted task—spend quality t
ime with the kids.

  Standing, he left his list on the table before heading out the front door. His stomach growling, he decided another thing to add to his list was to go into Bitter Creek and buy some food to stock his cupboards and fridge. Probably shouldn’t raid Kallie’s pantry all the time.

  Chief and Bella were hot on his trail as he strode down the crude road connecting the cottage to Kallie’s place. It was really just two dirt tracks worn through the grass by truck tires. Every step filled his mind with memories of working here. Everything from driving the tractor to working dogs to racing over the prairie on a four-wheeler with Kallie sitting behind him, arms holding on tight.

  That was where he stopped reminiscing.

  Because memories like that couldn’t be welcomed anymore. Even though he was back at Bitter Creek Farm for the indefinite future, life wasn’t going to return to the way it was back then. His relationship with Kallie wasn’t coming back, and he had to learn to be okay with it. Sure, he thought he’d accepted that fact these past two years. But some of those feelings still lingered, and he needed to cut them off before they had a chance to blossom into something detrimental.

  He stepped up to Kallie’s front door and opened it, placing a soft knock on the frame before entering. “Hello,” he called.

  Ruby barked twice and hurried to meet him, tail wagging at an exponential speed once she discovered it was someone she recognized.

  “Hey, friend.” Grant gave her a good rubdown. “I’m happy to see you, too.”

  When he looked up, he realized Kallie sat at the kitchen table, head in hand, staring at a stack of papers. He waited a couple of seconds, but she didn’t move.

  “Mornin’,” he said.

  She popped to life, as if she hadn’t noticed him come in. “Oh, hi, sorry. I was just going over Dad’s bills.”

  “Where are the kids?”

  “Still sleeping.”

  Grant glanced at the clock on the stove. “At eight in the morning?”

  “I know, it’s weird. But I think they’re growing. They’ve been eating a ton and had a long nap yesterday afternoon, too, for Rachel.” She got up from her chair and stuck her coffee mug into the microwave.

  After approaching the counter, Grant pulled down a mug of his own. He momentarily eyed hers as it turned in circles.

  “Do you have to do that very often?” He motioned to the mug. “Reheat your coffee?”

  She laughed. “A lot of moms do. I don’t even get a chance to make coffee most mornings, so...no, I guess not.”

  He chuckled and filled his mug, then brought it to his lips. “Mmm, this is good.”

  “Yeah, when you don’t make much of it, you can afford to buy the good stuff.”

  “Well, prepare to buy the cheap stuff ’cause I drink a lot of coffee.”

  Kallie’s smile faded, then Grant’s did, too. The microwave beeped, but she didn’t move to open it. Instead, she pushed off the counter and retrieved a plate she’d been using from the table. “Have you eaten? I’ve got some English muffins in here. Or eggs. Which would you prefer?”

  “I’ll go light this morning and do a muffin. But I can get it myself.” She didn’t need to treat him like a guest if he was going to be sticking around. “I’ll buy you some more when I go to town today. That business I have to take care of while I’m there? It’s for Maxwell Thornton. Do you remember him from high school? He was in the grade above me.”

  “His little sister was in my class. He’s still in town? I thought he moved away.”

  “Well, I guess he’s back. And planning to build a guiding business for bird hunters.” Grant stuffed his English muffin into the toaster. “He reached out to me a couple of weeks ago, asking if I had any advice on getting the business up and running. He knew I’d worked with your dad and that his business had a solid reputation. I told him I was going to be passing through on my way to Wyoming, so I’d just stop by. Of course, that was before—”

  Before Frank had passed away and Grant had learned the truth.

  Kallie frowned. “When do you leave for the clinic?”

  “I’m not anymore. It just isn’t a great time to be leaving the farm.”

  Her frown deepened. “Is that going to be okay? Canceling like that? Do you have room to reschedule?”

  He hesitated. “My schedule’s pretty open right now.”

  “Why?”

  “I canceled them all.”

  Her brows shot up. “What? You’re kidding.”

  “Look, I want to be here for my kids.”

  “Grant...” she groaned. “How long are you planning on staying?”

  “I told you. I’m not leaving.”

  “You say that now, but life’s going to get in the way. Just watch.”

  “Why do you assume that?”

  “It happens to everyone who tastes freedom. Everyone who has left the farm for a time. Happened to my mom.”

  “In case you forgot, Kallie, I just found out I was a father less than twenty-four hours ago. It’s not fair of you to assume what I will or won’t do regarding the kids. And come on. Give me a little credit. I’ll stay committed to them.”

  “Well, you didn’t to me.”

  Grant clamped his jaw shut. Sorry didn’t even begin to describe how he felt about the way he’d left. Just a month after his proposal, Grant was driving away from Bitter Creek with no plans of returning. It had been stupid, childish. The worst thing he’d ever done. He hadn’t known how to deal with anything hard in life.

  “I made that mistake once,” he said, his voice quiet but strong. “I won’t make it again.” He’d hoped she would understand but by the wounded look in her eyes, she didn’t. “You’re just going to have to trust me, Kal.”

  The toaster popped, so he lifted out his English muffin halves and dropped them onto a plate.

  After a few more seconds of silence, Kallie cleared her throat. “So, down to business. If you’re going to be living here, then you’re going to have to help with the chores.”

  “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  She paused for a moment, as if she’d expected more pushback from him. “Well, good.”

  Grant took a seat across from Kallie and she immediately leaped from her chair like his muffin had from the toaster. She headed for the living room without a backward glance. “I can’t believe the kids aren’t awake. They never sleep this long. I’d better check on them.”

  “Hold up a second.”

  She stopped in the doorway and slowly turned back.

  “I don’t want to fight with you all the time,” he said.

  Maintaining eye contact, she exhaled, as if releasing tension that had been pent up since before he’d arrived. “I don’t, either.”

  “Can’t we call a truce or something?”

  It took her a long moment to answer, and he wondered what was going through her mind. She never had been much for communication. Which didn’t bother Grant, usually—except for when it came to discussing important issues. Like the one they were facing now.

  If they weren’t going to meet their issues head-on, he’d at least see if they could agree to disagree, rather than watch Kallie sidestep the elephant in the room day after day. He only hoped he could draw out a discussion about their new situation piece by piece, over time.

  “Okay,” she finally said, finding a faint smile. “A truce it is.”

  He smiled, too, and hers widened. Man, it was a great smile.

  She came back to the table and took a seat, then must have remembered her coffee because she got up to get it.

  “I’m glad you brought up chores,” Grant began. “I want to split them with you. Sometimes I’ll do them, and other times you can. I want a couple of days a week to take care of the kids. To get to know them.”

  He brought the mug to his mouth, watching
her reaction. He could tell she didn’t love the idea but thankfully, she nodded. It’d be nice if he could better understand why she had an aversion to him getting involved with the kids. Maybe the truth would come out in time, and maybe he could eventually earn her trust.

  “You said you were looking at your dad’s bills?”

  “Yeah,” she said through a sigh, sinking back into her chair and flipping through a couple of pages. “He got a loan at the beginning of this year to pay for the crops. And his combine finally quit a couple summers ago, so he had to get another one. Not to mention all the medical bills.” She raised her eyes to meet Grant’s. “Dad’s savings was next to nothing, and all of these need to be paid off. I just feel all this pressure, like a dragon is breathing down my neck.” She rubbed her forehead with both hands and sighed again. “If we can’t pay for them, then we’ll have to use the estate to do it.”

  “Now, hold your horses, Kal.” Grant sat up so he could lean closer. “I’m sure there’s something we can do. How much is the total owed?”

  Kallie pointed to a number scribbled on some notebook paper.

  Grant tried not to grimace. “Okay, well, it’s not as bad as it could be. What about his life insurance policy?”

  “Didn’t have much. Like, hardly any. He never signed up for one until he found out he was sick.” Her expression clouded. “It covered his funeral expenses, but that’s about it.”

  Not good. How sad that Frank had found himself in that situation. Grant couldn’t imagine leaving his kids with nothing. Good thing he was inquiring about his own insurance this week. “Don’t worry, Kallie. We’ll figure it out.”

  Her shoulders stiffened, and he could almost visibly see the wall going up around her. “Thanks, but it doesn’t need to involve you.” She bunched all the papers into a tight pile and tapped them together on the table. “I’m the executor of the will, so it’s my responsibility.”

  He drummed his fingers on the table for a moment, debating on how much to say. It might legally be her responsibility, but it was half his estate, too. Not to mention their children’s inheritance one day. Finally, he stood, sensing it was time to back off for a bit. “Okay, then. Did you hire a crew to do the spraying?”