Risky Rules of a Passionate Governess

by Henrietta Harding

  “But you have to have something!” Prudence said, her voice desperate.

  “There are various things that we could try, but his case sounds dire,” the apothecary replied.

  “Give me anything that you have,” Prudence said, shaking her head. “Anything that can cure my little boy.”

  Katherine’s heart began to pound in her chest. There was only one person that Prudence could be speaking of and that was Harry. What was amiss? Was he truly ill? Katherine’s head was instantly spinning and her breathing became erratic. She stepped up to the counter immediately.

  “It is Harry?” She asked, and Prudence turned to her, fear written on her face.

  “My god. Katherine,” Prudence said, bringing a hand up to her chest.

  “Please, tell me what is the matter,” Katherine said, thinking that there was no time for reintroductions.

  “Harry is remarkably ill,” Prudence began to explain. “The duke and Lord Garret are beside themselves. We’ve had the doctor come to Bonhomie, but he says that there is nothing that he can do.”

  “That’s impossible,” Katherine replied.

  “I thought the very same. That’s why I came to the apothecary. I thought that surely there would be something here that could help.”

  “I must see him at once,” Katherine said.

  “What’s that?” Sybil asked, stepping up the counter.

  “Mum, the boy has taken ill,” Katherine explained, her heart still pounding in her chest.

  “The duke’s boy?” Sybil asked.

  “Yes, this is Prudence, his maid,” Katherine said.

  “I’ve never seen anything like it,” Prudence replied.

  “I must go to him,” Katherine said to her mother.

  “Oh, Kat,” Sybil said, looking doubtful.

  “I must, mother. I know that I can help. My presence can help him,” Katherine said with great conviction.

  “He’s not Peter,” Sybil said softly, and Katherine felt her heart sink. No, Harry was not Peter, the brother that Katherine had lost when he was 6 years of age. But every time that Katherine looked into Harry’s eyes, she saw Peter. It was what had taken her to Bonhomie. Although she knew in her mind and in her heart that Harry was not Peter, Katherine still thought that she couldn’t bear to lose another young boy that she loved desperately.

  “I know that he is not Peter,” Katherine said, realising that it was the first time in years that she had even uttered her dead brother’s name. “But Harry is no less important to me,” Katherine went on. “I must be by his side.”

  Prudence looked confused. Surely, she didn’t know who Peter was but she also didn’t bother to ask. The situation that they found themselves in didn’t leave any time for questions. “I know that he would be comforted,” Prudence said.

  “You may do as you please,” Sybil said. “Just take care of yourself, Kat,” she added, taking her daughter’s hand.

  “Of course I will,” Katherine replied.

  It was determined that they needed to leave at once. Prudence took the various tinctures that the apothecary gave her and carried them out in a little cloth sack. Katherine and Prudence got into the family carriage and headed towards Bonhomie. Katherine was so afraid that she could scarcely catch her breath. The interior of the carriage reminded her of her old life, and she realised that she was headed back to that life instantly. Katherine had convinced herself that she would never see Bonhomie again, and there she was, directly en route.

  “The poor boy,” Prudence said, looking out of the window at the rain.

  “How long has this been going on?” Katherine asked.

  “Two whole days. His skin is as white as alabaster. He’s nearly blue.”

  Katherine brought a hand up to her mouth. No doubt seeing the boy in such a state would break her heart, but she would much rather see it with her own eyes and be by his side than not see him at all. Katherine would have to be strong, and she never felt more determined in her life.

  “How is the duke?” Katherine asked, not daring to mention Lord Garret. Just the sound of his name would undo her completely.

  “Beside himself,” Prudence replied. “Hasn’t slept these two days. Poor Constance is distraught. Even the servants of Bonhomie seem to be besieged with sadness.”

  “It will all be all right,” Katherine said, reaching over and placing a comforting hand over Prudence’s.

  “I surely hope so,” Prudence replied.

  The journey wasn’t long and Katherine couldn’t keep her mind from reeling. What if Harry did not make it? Did she have the strength to endure another young boy’s death; a boy that she cared for with all of her heart and soul?

  Arriving at Bonhomie, Katherine could see that it didn’t have the same happy mystique that she remembered. The first time that she had arrived at that roundabout, Bonhomie seemed to be a grand castle out of a story book. But now, with the dark clouds overhead, the grand estate seemed like a dungeon.

  Alighting from the carriage, Katherine could feel the mud at her feet. Not bothering to open an umbrella, she shielded her face from the rain and ran towards the home, Prudence following behind her. Coming up the stone steps, Katherine turned and saw topiary there, perfectly manicured. The memory of Hans almost made her smile, but it was not enough of a warm memory to banish the dread and fear that she was feeling deep within.

  The door was opened immediately and Katherine found Nigel standing there, a look of immense shock upon his face.

  “Katherine?” He said.

  “Nigel, I ran into Prudence in town,” Katherine began to explain. “She has told me all.”

  “This way,” Nigel said, as though there was no need for further explanation. He led her up the stairs and to the third floor to Harry’s room. Walking down the hall Katherine could hear whispers and murmurs coming from the room, indicating that perhaps the whole family had gathered there. Her heart continuously pounded in her chest and Katherine tried to brace herself for what was about to come.

  Nigel pushed open the door and Katherine stepped in, taking a deep breath as she did so. Sure enough, standing around Harry’s bed, she discovered the entire De Bowes family had assembled. The first eyes that she met were Lord Garret’s. Katherine had to instantly look away.

  “Katherine,” Constance said breathlessly, rushing towards her and hurling herself into Katherine’s arms.

  “Constance,” Katherine replied.

  “Heavens,” the duke said, sitting beside Harry on the bed.

  Letting go of Constance, Katherine instantly walked towards the bed and seated herself on the opposite side. She brought a hand to her cheek in shock, looking down at Harry; his eyes were closed and his skin nearly blue, just as Prudence had described. She brought a hand to his forehead and felt Harry’s icy skin.

  “We have lit a fire,” the duke said, motioning towards it. “And he’s covered in as many blankets as we could find.”

  “Can he drink?”

  “We have tried broth but he won’t take it,” the duke continued to explain.

  Just then, Katherine saw in the corner of her eye that Lord Garret was leaving the room. She daren’t turn to watch him go. Perhaps Lord Garret was infuriated to see her. The thought was profoundly disturbing but there was no time to worry about such things. Katherine would keep her focus upon Harry in his time of need.

  Looking down at the young boy, Katherine could see that his eyelids were fluttering as she spoke.

  “He knows that you’re here,” the duke said with a faint smile. Katherine looked up at Lord Roland and saw how different his appearance was since the last time that she had encountered him. There were dark circles under his eyes and the first tufts of grey hair had appeared on his head. It was apparent that he had aged several years in that brief period.

  “I can get him to drink the broth,” Katherine said, placing her hand on his forehead once more. “I’m sure of it.”

  “You are welcome to try,” the duke replied.

&nbs
p; “May I stay here for as long as he is ill?” Katherine asked Lord Roland. His eyes went wide with shock, and Katherine couldn’t tell if he was pleased or disturbed by the idea.

  “Need you even ask me that?” Lord Roland replied.

  “Well, I know that I never responded to your letter,” Katherine said in hushed tones.

  “Don’t worry yourself with that,” the duke said, heaving a sigh of relief. “I almost didn’t expect it.”

  That was when Katherine noticed that the look in the duke’s eye was one of gratitude and relief. It brought her unspeakable joy to know that she was welcome back at the estate, and that her presence could be of use in some way.

  “Bring up more broth,” Katherine said to a servant that stood nearby.

  “Yes, M’am,” the servant replied with a curtsy and left the room.

  “We will have your old room prepared,” the duke said.

  “That will be unnecessary,” Katherine replied. “I will stay here with Harry.”

  “Surely, you’ll be unable to sleep,” the duke said.

  “That’s all right,” Katherine replied. “I won’t need to sleep.”

  The duke got up from the bed and placed his hands upon his hips, still looking down at his boy. “I said the very same to myself, but now I fear that sleep is calling to me.”

  “Go and rest yourself,” Katherine said. “I will remain here.”

  “Very well,” the duke replied, turning to leave. He stopped himself and looked towards Katherine once more. “Katherine, I’m overjoyed to have you here.”

  Finally, a smile came to Katherine’s lips. What he said made her feel so much joy that she was unable to reply with words.

  Katherine stayed there throughout the afternoon and watched as servants and family members came and went. The doctor returned late in the afternoon and had a sorrowful expression upon his face, as though he was unsure of what to do. Katherine remained steadfast, getting Harry to open his eyes once or twice and gently encouraging a few spoonsful of broth to pass through his lips.

  She couldn’t help but think of Lord Garret. The very fact that he was in that house, under the same roof as her, occupied the back of her mind. It was as though she could feel his presence even though he didn’t dare draw near. What might he be thinking? How was he feeling in those weeks that followed after he had left the parlor of her home? Perhaps Lord Garret was wrapped up in contempt. If that was the case, then it was going to be something that Katherine would need to accept.

  Katherine noted that Harry’s cold skin would turn bright red and hot, then there would be sweat and the young boy would become cold again. His temperature was wildly erratic and filled Katherine with a sense of fear and dread. It had been much the same when Peter had died. She had vivid memories of young Peter lying there, Sybil desperately trying to cool him down and then heat him up.

  Katherine also recalled how her mother would try to feed Peter broth, but to no avail. Luckily, Harry was taking in a few spoonsful and Katherine chose to look at this as a sign of hope. Things were going to be different. Katherine was determined to make things different.

  Constance came into the room from time to time and would sit on a chair in the corner, curling herself up into a little ball. The sister seemed remarkably sad and scared, but every now and again she would look to Katherine and a faint smile would come to her lips, as though her old governess’ presence warmed her heart in some way.

  The day progressed and night finally fell, but still there was not much improvement with Harry. Katherine remained by his side, even as the fire began to dwindle. That was when she heard those familiar boots coming down the hall and the door to Harry’s room was opened.

  Lord Garret stood there, that same look of weighty sadness upon his face. In contrast to his brother, the worry and the fear had not aged Lord Garret. In fact, he looked clear-eyed and stalwart. A rush of heat came over Katherine’s body, which was the customary effect that Lord Garret’s presence had on her.

  As he stood in the doorway, the flicker of the fire played upon his features and he seemed to merely stand still, looking at her. Katherine opened her mouth to speak and then decided to look away, lest she reveal to Lord Garret exactly what she was feeling in that moment; a mixture of guilt, sadness, longing, and the pain of so many things that had gone unsaid.

  Katherine waited and listened as she heard Lord Garret’s boots walking towards her. He was walking slowly, deliberately, and as Katherine felt him coming closer and closer, a flush came to her cheek.

  Chapter 25

  Earlier in the day, Lord Garret had been unsure how to proceed. Seeing Katherine that afternoon had filled him with joy and confusion all at once. Part of him expected to never see her again, and then there she was, her skin soaked with rain and a look of fear and pain upon her face as she viewed young Harry.

  The very presence of her had lifted a huge weight from Lord Garret’s chest. Like his brother, he had had difficulty sleeping since Harry took ill. In fact, Lord Garret felt the weight of the boy’s illness as though he were the father, and not Lord Roland.

  The entire energy of the household changed upon Katherine’s arrival. The servants seemed more hopeful and the duke ordered that a fine dinner might be prepared that night in order to lift the family’s spirits. Sadly, Katherine did not come down to dine. She was determined to stay beside the boy, and although Lord Garret appreciated this, it still pained him no end. He wanted to bask in the sight of her as much as possible. However, this was not so when she first arrived.

  When Katherine had stepped into Harry’s room, Lord Garret found that, despite his joy, seeing her was far too overwhelming and he removed himself at once. Even Lord Garret himself was confused by this action, but it seemed as though his body was willing him to absent himself because he was unsure of what he might do.

  The instinct was to pull her out of the room, demand a private conference with her, and perhaps even throw himself at his feet once more. To avoid such embarrassment, Lord Garret thought it best to retire to his room and come up with a plan. The best idea that came to mind was that, when it was finally evening and he had collected his thoughts and emotions into a more stable arrangement, he would go up to speak with Katherine.

  And so, after dinner, Lord Garret made his way up to the third floor with a bit of trepidation in his breast. Did Katherine banish her feelings for him? Certainly, she had not banished her feelings for Bonhomie or Harry, for here she was. That made Lord Garret happy enough. But if Katherine still held onto even an ounce of love for him, he would do everything in his power to make Katherine stay; not just at the estate, but also stay in his life.

  Walking down the hall, Lord Garret momentarily thought of how much things had changed since Katherine had first lived under that roof. Lord Garret’s personal finances were sound; perhaps more sound than the duke’s. He had gotten a hold of himself both financially but also mentally, physically, and yes, even emotionally. Lord Garret felt prepared to begin a life that did not leave him in his brother’s shadow, and he had to admit that he wished for Katherine to be a part of that life as well.

  Gently opening the door, Lord Garret beheld Katherine seated there, a taper burning on the side table and the final embers of the fire still crackling and burning. She turned towards him and the candlelight danced upon her face, making her a vision like none he had ever seen.

  Leonardo DaVinci could not have painted a more perfect portrait. He wished to go to her immediately, pick her up and take her in his arms, but Lord Garret knew that it could not be. In order to avoid any unspeakable behavior, Lord Garret quietly walked towards her and watched as Katherine turned away, back towards Harry.