My Kind of Love

by Jill Sanders

  She avoided his gaze until after they’d ordered, and Julie had taken her menu away. She had nothing left to hide behind.

  “This was a great addition,” Josh said, getting her attention.

  “What?” she asked.

  “The deck.” He nodded to the sunset. “I bet it’s packed every night.”

  She glanced around and, sure enough, there were almost a dozen other couples enjoying the warm weather and the sunset.

  Several were snapping pictures as they stood along the railing. Carrie suspected they were tourists.

  “Yes.” She smiled. “I always love serving out here.”

  “Contrary to your belief, I really did want this conversation to be more… private.”

  She sighed heavily. “So, we’ve got some time before our food will be out. Why don’t you start?” She leaned forward so that he could lower his voice and they wouldn’t be heard.

  “Where do I start?” He took a drink of the beer that Julie had just delivered.

  “How about with why you left?” she asked.

  “Believe me, it wasn’t my choice.” The look on his face was that of sheer sorrow.

  She frowned at him. “What does that mean?”

  * * *

  How did he tell her that he hadn’t wanted to leave her or Pride? That he’d gone out of fear for his life—and hers? He supposed there were a million smooth ways to do it, but even though he’d had two years to practice what he’d say, the words escaped him.

  “My car broke down. Remember?” he asked her.

  “It was in the shop,” she answered. “I had to drive you to work.”

  He’d been working during the day at the Oar and at night stocking for the grocery store. Which is why they had decided to move into the apartment above O’Neil’s, to save time and money. And besides, Patty was going to give them a great deal on the place.

  “I was getting ready to move out, with you.” Memories flooded his mind.

  “The apartment.” She nodded. “Go on.”

  “I had packed up all my stuff, which hadn’t been much. It fit in a duffle bag. My mother was at work.” His mother still worked in the bakery. She still loved it since she was pretty much done with her workday at ten in the morning.

  “Continue,” she said when he stopped talking.

  “I figured I’d haul my bag over to work since I needed to go into town to get something…” He glanced around. “I walked.” His eyes turned back to her. “And I ran into my father. It was the first time I’d seen him sober in a long time. He yelled at me to get into the truck. I don’t know why, but I climbed in. We drove for a while in silence. I thought he was going to take me into town, but he drove me to the train station in Edgeview. When he parked, I asked him what was going on.” He took a deep breath. “He told me that it was about damn time I got out of my mother’s hair, so he could be with her again. He said that if he ever saw me in Pride again, he’d shoot me like a stray dog.”

  Carrie gasped and reached for his hand. His eyes moved to her smaller hand over his. He held back the details about the fight they’d had in the parking lot and that he’d boarded the only train he had enough money for tickets for with a black eye and a busted lip. He had less than fifty dollars in his wallet after paying for the ticket to Portland.

  “Where did you go?” she asked.

  “Portland for a while. Then I hitched a ride with someone I’d met to LA, where I was a fry cook in a greasy hole-in-the-wall, barely making rent and living off the free food they gave me.”

  “What changed?” she asked.

  “Someone gave me an old laptop and I spent my free time learning a new computer language. Coding became my life outside of flipping burgers.”

  “Is that how you started your business?”

  “No, luck was how that happened. I worked as a fry cook, and on my off time, I started learning all I could about online security after my mother’s account was hacked. I’d been filling in for another cook one night when a man came in to the diner. I overheard him talking about security at the bank he worked for.” He leaned closer. “The guy was bragging about stealing millions, and he was talking as loud as a howler monkey about it too. So, I took my break, went on a hunch that he wasn’t smart enough to lock his phone, hacked his phone, and got his info, then…” He shrugged. “Called it in.”

  “And?” She was sitting on the edge of her chair. Julie chose that moment to deliver their food and she had to wait until they were alone again.

  “Go on,” she said, pushing her steak aside until the story was done.

  “The next week, the new CEO of the bank gave me a call. They asked me to come in, so I did. They asked me what I did for a living. I told them I was a programmer and they hired me for a low-level security job. After months of proving myself to them, I showed them what I could do for the company by plugging a few more leaks that they didn’t even know about. That’s when they hired me to handle their online security.”

  “Just like that?” she asked.

  He nodded. “Just like that. I started International Security and within the first month had secured more than three million bank account records that had been hacked.”

  She picked up her fork. “No more cooking?”

  He shook his head. “I only cooked here”—he looked around at all the changes and figured he’d gone through just as many as the old building had— “so I could be close to you.”

  Chapter 7

  She knew everyone was staring at them and had been since they’d walked in together. She tried to ignore it.

  After hearing Josh’s story, some of the blame she’d thrown his way she now aimed at his father.

  The man was horrible. Why he couldn’t leave his youngest son alone was beyond everyone in town. Josh’s brother, Tom, and sister, Susie, hadn’t gone unscathed, but Kevin Williams had really had it out for Josh.

  She remembered seeing bruises on him when he was younger, long before he’d ever known she existed. Or so she’d thought. After their conversation the other week, she’d started wondering just how long ago he’d noticed her.

  They talked about his experience in LA. Still, he avoided her questions about why he’d moved back to Pride.

  “Aren’t you concerned about your dad? I mean, there’s probably only going to be more outbursts like the one the other day.”

  “I’m sure there will be, but I can’t live my life trying to please a man who has never been pleased with anything before.”

  “Will he cause trouble for you?” she asked, remembering the night he’d scared her as she took out the trash. He’d called Josh a chip off the old block.

  The man sitting across from her now was nothing like his father. She’d seen pictures of Kevin Williams in high school—Sara had shown the yearbook to her—and sure, they looked a lot alike. Same eyes, same basic coloring. But that was where the resemblance stopped.

  “You got quiet all of a sudden,” Josh said.

  “Your father said… he said you were a chip off the old block.”

  He frowned at her and pushed his empty plate aside. “What do you think?” She was surprised that he asked. The old Josh just would have denied it.

  Leaning back, she looked him over. “You have his coloring, the same color of eyes and hair, but…” She paused and really thought about it. “At one point, I would have agreed with him. After you left.”

  Josh nodded. “I can see that. But…?” he prodded.

  “But,” she started, “after hearing what happened, how do you expect me to stay angry with you for all of it?”

  His eyebrows shot up. “All of it?”

  “Sure, I mean, I’m still pissed about some things. Your father probably didn’t have a gun to your head when you told me it was over. You could have explained what happened. I would have come and gotten you and we could have talked to my father.”

  He was shaking his head and she stopped talking.

  “Why not?” she asked.

  “I
t wasn’t just me he threatened.” He surprised her by standing up. “Let’s take a walk on the beach.” He tossed down money to pay for the meal.

  “What did you mean?” she asked, once they were out of the restaurant.

  He took her hand and led them down the steps towards the beach. They walked in silence for a few minutes in the dark. The moon and stars were their only light as they walked. He hadn’t dropped her hand and, if she had to be honest, it felt too wonderful for her to pull hers away from his.

  When he stopped, she turned and looked at him. “Are you ready to tell me?”

  “My dad is messed up.” He dropped her hand and ran his through his hair in frustration.

  “Josh, I’ve known this for a long time.”

  “He had pictures of you,” he blurted out.

  That stopped her. “What?” She shook her head.

  “On his phone. Pictures of you shopping, of you at the restaurant, those kinds of things.”

  She relaxed slightly. “Okay,” Anyone could snap a picture of her in her everyday life. It was creepy, but not against the law.

  “He told me how easy it would be to get to you. How easy it would be to harm you. He said if I didn’t walk away, he could get to you, hurt you, so easily. Too easily.” She tensed. “Now you see why I had to leave town.” He paced back and forth in front of her. “It wasn’t just me.” He stopped and looked down at her.

  Without thinking, she closed the gap between them and tugged him down until he was a breath away. “You stupid, stupid man,” she said before kissing him.

  She’d been right, it was like coming home. His mouth covered hers, and his arms wrapped around her body as she pressed up against him. Here, she thought, was that telling spark she’d been looking for. Her entire life, she’d only had it with him.

  When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers.

  “This is a bad idea.” He sighed. “Everyone is telling us it is a very bad idea.”

  “They don’t know the whole story.” She leaned back and looked into his eyes and then reached up and took his face in her hands. “They have nothing to do with this.”

  “No. But they do matter. They’re in our lives every day.” He leaned back, and she dropped her hands to his shoulders. He reached up and brushed a wild strand of her hair away from her eyes. “I don’t want them pestering you about me.”

  “What about your father?” She tensed, then got an idea. “We could try to keep it a secret.”

  He chuckled. “In Pride? A secret?”

  She deflated. “Yeah.” Sighing heavily, she glanced around. Even now, they were still within full view of the restaurant. At least it was dark on the beach. And most of the people sitting on the deck enjoying dinner were too busy to look down an empty beach. Besides, they probably looked like black blobs to them. They had, however, just eaten together in front of everyone.

  “I’ll bet it’s already all over town that we had dinner together.” He took her hand and started walking back to the restaurant.

  “No doubt.” She leaned closer to him. “So, what’s the plan?”

  “First, I’m going to walk you to your car, and then I’m going to drive home, alone, to take Louie for a short walk, and then go to bed, alone.” He tugged on her hand until she stopped again. “But before all that, I want to kiss you once more.” He pulled her into his arms.

  His body felt so good next to hers, she didn’t want to let go. When his lips brushed slowly over hers, she sighed and melted into the kiss. She hadn’t realized tears were rolling down her face until he pulled back and brushed them away with his thumb.

  “That’s it?” She shook her head. “You’re going to let him win again?”

  “I can’t chance losing you.” He rested his forehead on hers again. “It broke me to leave you, but being with you, like this, is somehow just as hard. Knowing that I can’t risk it. Risk you.”

  “Do you think your dad will do anything?’ she asked, the memory of her encounter with the man the other week playing in her mind.

  “I’ve never been able to predict what my father will do. But I can’t deny that it’s one of the main reasons I’m trying to steer clear of you.”

  “Trying?” She smiled and enjoyed his smile in return.

  He took her face in his hand and kissed her again. “Okay, last one.” He kissed her again quickly. “God, you’re an addiction.” He chuckled. “Yes, trying.” He took a giant step back. “Come one, I’ll walk you to your car.”

  * * *

  Josh rode home, his mind so focused on the night with Carrie that he didn’t notice his father’s truck until he shut off the engine to his bike.

  “Damn,” he sighed. Taking a reassuring breath, he climbed off the bike.

  He’d expected the man to be drunk and to take a swing at him, but he hadn’t counted on the old man being so fast. His face had just recovered from the last swing, and now he’d have to recover again.

  He gripped his father’s arms and held him tight. “I told you,” his father growled, “nothing good would come out of you seeing that bitch.”

  His grip tightened. “Watch it,” he growled. “Take as many swings at me as you want but leave Carrie out of this.”

  His father squirmed until he released him. His father stood, looking at him in the darkness. “Every time you shack up with…”—Josh’s eyes narrowed, and his father backtracked— “with the sheriff’s daughter, the man stalks me.”

  “Bull.” He shook his head. “If Robert is stalking you, it’s because you’re the town drunk.”

  This next swing, Josh deflected easily.

  “Are you going to stop hitting me?” Josh finally backed away, putting some space between them.

  “Spare the rod…” It was the old excuse his father had used to beat all three of his kids.

  “Fuck this.” Josh turned to go inside. That was when he noticed Louie barking insistently.

  Rushing up the outside stairs, he opened the door and grabbed hold of the dog’s leash.

  “What the fuck is that?” His father had followed him up the stairs and was teetering on the top stair.

  “My dog,” he answered.

  He was about to go in and shut the door on his father’s face, when a beam of light downstairs caught his attention.

  “What the…” He grabbed Louie’s leash from a hook by the door and clipped it on him. His father moved away as if the dog would infect him, and he rushed down the stairs with Louie still barking.

  As he hit the bottom stair, a loud crash signaled the front store windows being broken. By the time he and Louie ran around to the front, a dark car was squealing away from a parking spot at the end of the street.

  “Friends of yours?” he asked as his father stopped beside him.

  “Fuck you.” He turned to go, but Josh held onto him. “You’re not driving.”

  His father leaned closer and the smell of alcohol hit Josh. “As I said, fuck you.”

  His father jerked his arm free and walked away.

  Pulling out his phone, he punched Robert’s number and filled the man in on what had happened.

  Within ten minutes, Robert’s patrol car was parking in front of the building.

  “David’s checking to make sure your dad got home safe,” Robert said as he got out of the car. “Did you get a license plate?” He stopped beside him, bent down, and scratched Louie between the ears.

  “No, it was a dark sedan.” He shrugged. “Newer model.”

  “Anything missing or stolen inside?” he asked.

  “I haven’t been in yet.” He glanced down at the glass. “I’ll take Louie up.”

  Robert nodded, and Josh turned to go.

  “Heard you had dinner with Carrie tonight,” Robert said softly.

  Sighing, Josh turned back towards the man.

  “Yes.” He waited.

  “So, is she the one that gave you that?” He nodded to his sore face.

  Reaching up, he touched his eye and cring
ed at the pain.

  “No, this is all thanks to my dad.”

  Robert’s eyebrows drew up. “Want me to charge him?”

  “No.” He looked down at his dog. “Just make sure he stays away from Carrie.” He turned to go.

  “Are you two back together?” Robert called after him.

  “No.” He shook his head.

  “Good,” Robert said behind him. “I don’t think she could deal with that kind of hurt again.”

  It stung slightly that Robert assumed that he would hurt Carrie like he had before.

  If he wasn’t worried about what his dad would do, he’d do whatever he could to win her back. If he was lucky enough to pull it off, there was nothing that would keep him from holding onto her forever.

  Josh started to make his way around the building. “Good thing you don’t have to worry about it, then,” he said softly.

  After tonight, the way his old man had acted, he knew there was no way the people in town would accept him getting back with Carrie. Not after what he’d done to her, how he’d left, even if it wasn’t his fault. His father had ruined his life once, and he wasn’t going to let his shit affect Carrie’s happiness. Not if he could avoid it by just staying away from her.

  When Josh came back outside, he was on the phone with Mason, who informed him that he’d be there in fifteen minutes.

  “Let’s go in.” Robert nodded to the door.

  Josh unlocked it and walked in, flipped on the bright lights, and groaned.

  “Shit,” he said under his breath.

  “Wow, I take it this isn’t what it looked like before?” Robert asked.

  Every computer screen was shattered. Every computer lay in pieces. Even the desks and chairs were smashed to pieces. It was obvious now that the window was just the last thing they’d destroyed. They’d clearly spent lots of time inside destroying everything else.

  The white board that he’d hung on the brick wall had been ripped down and was laying twisted on the floor.

  “Okay, looks like we’ll have a full night of paperwork ahead of us.” Robert pulled out a pad. “Want to start with who you think might have done this?”