by Braxton Cole
I was torn. I wanted to drop onto him. Bam! Nothing, and then all the way down, with him driving into me as deep as he would go to that place where I could feel every little pulse from his heart throbbing inside me. But I also wanted to tease him, to prolong it and make it last, to make him truly beg for it.
I rocked my hips in a tight circle, pulling him in momentarily and out just as quickly. "Did you need something?"
"God, yes, you. Just you. Please." He moaned the last word over and over, a litany of please, please, please, and I couldn't hold out any longer.
I relaxed my legs and let my cunt slide onto him. He swore and shot up, his body folding at the middle. He grabbed my waist, his fingers spanning the expanse of skin, his thumbs rubbing over my ribs, and pulled me into a hot, open-mouthed kiss. His chest was hot and heaving desperately against mine. He rocked his hips up, pulling a moan from deep inside me.
He bit the skin behind my ear, then licked over it, his tongue flat and soothing. "I need to fuck you." He lifted me up slightly, his cock sliding out with the motion, then forced me down on top of him hard and fast.
I let him do that a couple more times because it felt fucking awesome. Being pushed jackhammer hard onto his cock was quickly becoming my new favorite thing to do, but the whole point of being on top is being in control. And I definitely wasn't with him manhandling me up and down his cock like I was his own personal sex toy.
"Hold up there." I pushed against his chest until he was flat on his back again, then I dropped a quick, sweet kiss on his lips. "Let me."
I raised up and leaned back, feeling his cock flex inside me. I twisted and swirled my hips until he was pressed hard against that perfect spot. I eased up, then back down, slow and methodical, feeling the hard force of his cock sliding against me. I braced my hands behind me, gripping his thighs as I rode him, building pressure and speed until all I could think about was the swell of desire deep in my cunt.
I was so fucking close, lifting and dropping at a crazy speed while he thrust his hips up to meet me. I wanted to come so bad I could taste the release building inside me. When I reached the tipping point, that place where a woman either comes hard or she drops back down because the swell was too much to handle and her body just won't let her go over, I moved my hand to my clit. I circled my fingers hard and fast, the surface too slick with my desire to find any real friction, but it was still enough. I came hard and fast, with Mateo still thrusting into me, pushing my orgasm even higher.
Then he pushed me onto my back, coaxing my legs around his waist with his hands, his hips working before I could even fully register the reversal in our positions. I really enjoyed controlling the pace, rolling my hips and urging him to the perfect spot, but having him slam into me with the crazy-fast tempo he'd established was pretty fucking okay, too.
"I can't last." He pressed his body against mine, pushing me into the bed with driving force, his hard abdomen slapping against mine with every thrust. He wrapped his arms around mine, snaking under my body and coming up to grip my shoulders from beneath. I was pinned and at his mercy. He stroked in and out of me and all I felt was the rising tide of fire building inside me, ready to burst open again.
"I'm close," I gasped. Too close, but that's the way it went with Mateo. It didn't matter how many times he made me come, my body craved him. I couldn't get enough. Aching and bruised, my body rose every time, quick and hard and insatiable, desperate to come for him again and again.
"You need to come now. Please, Roni." His words were stilted and hot, buried in my throat.
"Almost."
"Now." He bit down on my neck, pulling the skin between his teeth and sucking until my whole existence was limited to the thrust of his cock into my cunt and his mouth against my throat. He released it with a pop, then he rose up on his knees, jerking my hips up to meet him.
With my shoulders on the bed and the rest of my body bowed up to meet him, he slammed his hips into mine, thrusting and pounding with relentless fervor. Sweat lined his brow, his face contorted on the edge of release.
"Please." His legs trembled with the early warning signs of orgasm, and his grip on my waist tightened even further, then he moved his hands to my breasts. He squeezed, and pinched harder than should have been comfortable, but all it did was drive me higher, accelerating the desire coursing through my body. He thrust once, twice, and then once more, as his finger twisted my nipples to force me over the edge with him. He held himself deep in my cunt, his cock throbbing and jerking as he released inside me.
He shouted my name, and I tipped over the edge, my orgasm blooming low and spreading like wild fire through my body.
Mateo collapsed on top of me and that position, his full weight resting against me, was quickly becoming my favorite place to be. I loved the feel of him, solid and strong, holding me fast. His breath puffed against my neck, blowing over the bruise left behind by his teeth. He kissed gently at my distressed skin, his mouth stretching into a smile against it.
"Your neck is never going to recover." He kissed it again. Then, for good measure, he kissed the hickey on the other side that he'd left the previous day.
I held his head tight against me. He was right. Moreover, I didn't think I would ever recover. My heart was well past the point of no return and I had no idea what to do about it. I exhaled completely, letting out all the air in my lungs and letting Mateo sink more deeply into my body. My hold on him was desperate and clingy and all the things I'd never allowed myself to be with a man.
He held onto me just as tight.
And then my phone rang, the Hawaii 5-0 theme music that I'd assigned to my boss. I sighed, but didn't move to answer. Mateo gripped me just a little tighter.
"How long can you ignore that?" He sounded sad but resigned.
"Not very."
He started to move, but I wasn't ready to let him go. He was still inside me, smaller, but there. I wasn't ready to give up the feeling of being covered and filled by him. I held him fast, refusing to let him get up.
"Not yet. Just a few more minutes. Please." It was foolish and pointless. I was simply delaying the inevitable. I had to get up and get dressed and go about the business of catching bad guys. And Mateo needed to get back to the business of being a bad guy.
He stayed, but the mood had shifted. The moment of clear, beautiful peace that we shared between us was replaced with restless tension, with the knowing that it was all temporary.
He rose up above me, pulling back until he could look into my eyes. "Are you sure you won't consider a career change?"
At this point, facing the possibility of losing him or my career, it was a proposition with no clear winner. I would never, ever give up everything I'd worked so hard to build, my reputation as a good cop, to be with any man. I would resent it and hold it against him. But the desire to be with Mateo was overwhelming. It was not an urge easily put down.
"I can't. But you could, couldn't you?"
His face clouded over with a mixture of sadness and anger. "It's complicated."
"It's not complicated. You should see the files they have on you and Luis. It's only a matter of time before they close the loop. Get out now." If anyone found out I'd shared that much with Mateo, I would be subjected to a disciplinary hearing that would result in the loss of my job anyway, but I couldn't not tell him. It was my only hope.
He withdrew, pulling out of me and away from me at the same time. He left the bedroom, dropping his used condom in the small trash can in the bathroom before swinging the door shut between us. His face clearly said the topic was closed.
#
The police station looked the same even though it felt like I'd been gone forever. In reality, it'd only been a few days. Still, the person I was when I left was drastically different than the person I was now. The Lieutenant spotted me at my desk the moment he entered the bull pen.
"My office!" he barked as he passed by. He didn't slow down or glance sideways or do anything else to indicate who he was summon
ing, but we all knew. The other detectives kept their heads down over their work.
I followed him like a good little soldier.
"What's up, boss?" I stood in the open door. It was always better if it stayed open.
"Sit down. Close the door."
So much for that.
I did as directed and waited. He fiddled with his computer, then turned the screen toward me.
"This is great work, Guard. I'm impressed."
The screen showed Crimson shooting the man at the warehouse. Witnessing it in person had been enough for me. I didn't need to see the photographic evidence, too. I kept my gaze on the Lieutenant.
"Thank you, sir." It was disturbingly difficult for me to focus on the conversation. Busting Crimson's operation was career defining and my boss just complimented me on a job well done, but all I could think about was Mateo leaving my apartment that morning without saying goodbye. He hadn't even looked back, just let the door swing shut behind him with a deafening click.
"The U.S. Attorney wants to talk to him so the Feds are going to bring him in. They said we can ride along. Want to?" He was asking if I thought I needed my cover any longer and I wanted to tell him that I couldn't risk exposing myself. As long as I was under, there was a chance I would see Mateo again.
"Absolutely, sir." As much as I wanted to see him, it would kill me to have him ignore me again like he had that morning.
"Good. You can drive me."
The drive out to the race site took a lot longer at the legal speed limit and I didn't dare push it. There were too many federal black SUVs behind me and I wanted to make sure the whole parade made it there. I got a few second looks when I climbed out of my police sedan, but most of the people had their eyes on the flashing lights behind me. Obviously, they knew the races were illegal and were trying to decide if this was a raid or not.
I ignored them and led the group to Crimson's camp. I purposefully didn't look two trailers over to where Mateo and Luis were standing. And I totally ignored the deep scowl on Mateo’s face.
Crimson had the hood up on his car and was bent over beneath it looking at the engine. Someone else was in the driver's seat periodically hitting the accelerator.
"Craig White." I said his name with that fabulous cop voice that I spent hours perfecting when I was at the academy. I wanted to sound like a badass. It worked.
Crimson ignored me and signaled for the guy behind the wheel to rev it again. I smiled, held up my badge and pointed to my gun. The driver took my cue, not Crimson's. At that, Crimson emerged from beneath the hood. He dropped it shut when he saw his audience. No doubt he was working on a street-legal enhancement to his engine.
"What the hell?" Crimson looked at me and it took a few minutes for recognition to flash. The moment he recognized me, his face screwed up even tighter with confusion. "Roni?"
I held up my handcuffs, then let them slip apart so that one was resting on my index finger and the other one dangled below that. In another setting, it would have been sexy as hell. Given the circumstances, however, it wasn't sexy at all. It was only for show, since technically I couldn't arrest him for a crime that took place in Arizona. But it sure as fuck got his attention, as did the two federal agents flanking him.
I glanced to the right to see that Mateo and Luis had both disappeared inside their trailer. I hadn't been thinking when I agreed to come here. Now Mateo had to explain how he knew me and why he'd let a cop into their place of business. No wonder he looked pissed earlier.
They handcuffed him, read him his rights, and escorted him into one of the shiny black SUVs that had windows almost as dark as the paint. A person could disappear inside one of those and never be seen again.
The feds had warrants for several other members of Crimson's crew, specifically the ones who'd been present during the murder. When the others had been rounded up, I escorted my boss back to my car. It was kind of cool, in retrospect, that he wanted to come along. Usually he just issued orders, with "Pick him up" being one of his favorites. This was a big enough bust for him to want his name all over the arrest record, but I doubted his name, or mine for that matter, would make it into the federal reports.
To top it off, seeing Craig arrested had done nothing to alleviate the hollow feeling in my chest.
I drove away from the race site with my eyes on the rear view mirror. Mateo came out and stood on the top step of the trailer and followed my car with his eyes. His face was perfectly blank, no signs of emotion.
It was over.
Chapter 8
Six Months Later
It was close to midnight when I pulled into my parking space. My employer had received a bomb threat earlier that day and I'd spent the morning chasing down suspects. I'd finally found the prick who'd made the call, interrogated him vigorously, then turned him over to the authorities. All in all, a pretty impressive accomplishment for such a short period of time, but I was exhausted. Now I wanted a hot shower and bed.
I armed the alarm system on the big Navigator I was driving, a company car. No way I could afford something that slick. It was black and shiny with dark windows. A huge step up from my old police sedan.
"Nice wheels."
Mateo.
My brain recognized his voice, but my heart refused to accept it. I hadn't heard from him in six months. There was no reason for him to show up at my apartment in the middle of the night.
"Roni?"
I turned slowly, my hand on the P250 on my hip. I liked the way the Sig felt in my grip and that it held fifteen, plus one in the chamber, but I really hoped I didn't need it right then.
He stood beneath the courtyard light, his arms held out in supplication, no evidence of a weapon. That was a good sign. It lessened the odds that he'd come to kill me. As much as I missed him, as much as I felt a connection to him, it would have been foolish for me to discount his family obligations. He'd made his decision clear to me and it wasn't outside the realm of reality for Luis to demand my blood as proof of his loyalty. I popped the safety snap on the holster loose, but didn't pull the gun.
"Mateo."
"You don't look happy to see me."
In truth I was hopping up and down and screaming like a fucking kid on the inside. The grown up version of me didn't trust the situation enough to let that show.
"I'm not sure how I feel."
"How about you invite me in for a cup of coffee and we can talk about it."
It wasn't the safest possible choice, but it hadn't been the safest choice for him to help me all those months ago, either, but he had. I could extend one cup of coffee.
"Okay."
He followed me up the stairs and into my apartment without speaking. He moved silently, not even a rustle of fabric to betray his movement. He was like a goddamn ninja.
I dropped my bag just inside the door and hung up my jacket. I kept my holster on. "Do you really want coffee?"
"Not really, but if that's what it takes to keep you from kicking me out, I'll take it." He stood just inside the door, his hands in his pockets. Instead of the tight T-shirt I loved to peel off of him, he was wearing a button down shirt with long sleeves that covered his tattoos. I noticed he had let his hair grow out, too. His curls framed his forehead and ears, and just begged me to run my fingers through them.
"Come sit down." I wanted to lead him to the sofa, but I didn't trust myself that close to him. It didn't look like he was here to kill me, but that didn't mean I could jump him on the nearest flat surface either. I chose a chair at the table. He sat opposite.
"You look good," he said.
"Thanks." I should have, for the amount I spent on this suit, but I still felt like hammered shit after the day I'd had. We stared at each other for a few moments and all those old feelings for him stirred. "Why are you here?"
"I wanted to see you, talk to you." He stared at me, his face hopeful.
"So, talk."
He fumbled a card out of his shirt pocket and handed it to me. It had a business name,
Vargas Consulting, followed by Mateo's name and phone number.
"What's this?"
"Luis and I started a consulting company. We design security systems, among other things."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"You told me to get a different job. I thought--" He swallowed, but didn't continue his sentence.
He waited six months to approach me. Six fucking months. I wanted to be mad at him, to throw him out and tell him not to come back again. What kind of asshole keeps a woman waiting for that long and then shows up expecting everything to be okay? But I couldn't. I was too damn overwhelmed with excitement, hope, love. I couldn't do anything but choke back tears.
"What are you saying?" My makeup was ruined, but my voice was surprisingly calm.