Falling Through Darkness

by Kira Berger

  I sigh, my heart filling with joy at the knowledge that this incredible man loves me. And even though I still miss my family every day, I’ve realized I need to cherish the people I do have in my life. There is just one thing…

  “Have you heard from Emma or Brendan lately?” I ask, voicing my worry over that whole mess not for the first time in six months.

  “I spoke to Brendan before we left for this trip. He’s doing okay, I guess, under the circumstances. He’s pretty busy with Ella, unsurprisingly, but I know he misses Emma,” he answers me.

  “I wish there is something we could do to make them see what’s right in front of them.”

  Duncan smiles at me while he traces my features with his fingertips. “Like you saw what was right in front of you back then?” His voice vibrates with suppressed laughter. And he’s got a point.

  “So, we just wait and see? Hope for the best?”

  “And be there for them while we do that like they were for you—us. Not much else we can do.”

  I purse my lips in disappointment. Now that I’m happy, I want my friends to be as well. I hate seeing them this miserable. “Fine, I just hate seeing them so sad. Emma is terrible at faking being fine. I was so much better.” I grin at Duncan, trying to lighten the mood.

  “Sure you were,” Duncan says accompanied with a snort. “They’ll be fine though. They just need time.”

  “You’re probably right,” I say and turn my head to look at my family’s graves one more time, before I turn to him. “Let’s go. There is one more place I want to show you.”

  Once we’re in the car, I direct him up the mountain to a viewpoint I used to come to as a teenager. It overlooks the lake in the valley. I haven’t been here in years.

  Once we park and get out of the car, I grab Duncan’s hand and lead him down a narrow path to the edge of the cliff.

  “Damn, this view is breathtaking,” Duncan says quietly. And he’s right. It is. The sun is reflecting off the water and trees surrounding it, bathing it all in a serene light.

  We’re silent for a while, both of us seemingly deep in thought and just enjoying spending time together.

  I hear Duncan take a deep breath, so I turn to look him. The look in his eyes—a mixture of nervousness and elation––is confusing. What would he be nervous about?

  My confusion grows when he lets go of my hand and takes a step back. I watch him swallow nervously, getting more and more confused by his behavior. “What—”

  “Do you remember that first day we met?” he interrupts me, but he doesn’t give me chance to answer and continues. “I was blinded by your beauty and vulnerability, it was like I was looking into the sun. I’ve never witnessed someone be so vulnerable and strong at the same time. Alex, you’re one of the strongest people I know; I’m in awe of you and what you’ve gone through. You’re the one who taught me what it means to love unconditionally, and I never want to miss waking up to your eyes staring at me in the morning.”

  When he grabs my hand and suddenly drops to the ground on one knee, I gasp in surprise. He can’t be… We haven’t even been together for a year!

  “I knew when I was listening to you rattle off inconsequential facts about hippos on our first date that I would want to hear you tell me all that is on your mind for the rest of my life. I don’t care about hippos but seeing your face light up made me realize I wanted to be the one who made you look like that each and every day.

  “The road so far hasn’t been easy, that’s for sure, but I don’t care as long as I have you by my side. When you were in that hospital bed unconscious all those months ago, I finally realized what Sean Maguire was talking about when he told Will he didn’t know anything about real loss. When I thought I lost you, I could see a future I didn’t know I wanted turn to dust, and the loss I felt in those hours was devastating. I love you more than anything in this world, Alex. And I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”

  Tears of joy are running down my face, I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy. I look at him and all I see is love and joy shining in the depth of his deep blue eyes. I can’t believe this amazing man loves me enough to put up with my shit.

  “I don’t want to know what life would be like without your idiosyncrasies in it,” he says. “So, surrounded by the place where you grew up, the place I know you feel closest to your family, I’m going to ask you the most important question I’ve ever asked anyone. Alex, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife and sharing a life filled with imperfections?”

  My hand automatically covers my mouth, trying to keep the quiet sobs from escaping as happiness fills me. “Oh, my God, yes! Hell yes, I will,” I cry before I throw myself at him. We topple backward with me on top. I kiss him deeply, showing just how much I love him. His arms close around me while he answers the kiss with just as much fervency. Our tongues dance in tandem and for a minute we enjoy the intimacy of this moment.

  Slowing our kiss, he pulls away from me. His eyes are shining with love while he looks at me. He gently brushes my hair away from my face, smiling softly at me. “Are you happy?” He asks a question I’ve become used to. He’s made a habit of asking me this every so often over the last few months.

  “I am. Thank you. This was perfect. We’re surrounded by my family, my home, and one of the most beautiful panoramas ever.”

  “So, I did good?”

  “More than good. You made every dream I didn’t allow myself to dream come true.”

  I’m staring at everything surrounding us, marveling at how far I’ve come over the last year when I feel something slide onto my finger. He lifts my hand and places a kiss on my palm. “I love you, more than myself, more than anything on this earth. Thank you for saying yes and making me the happiest man alive.”

  I smile at him; this beautiful human I know I don’t deserve but will never let go. “Thank you for saving me, Duncan.” I cup his cheek. I can see the diamond on my ring reflecting the sun in a ray of light across my hand and his face. The ring is simple, a plain silver band with a round diamond nestled into it. It’s magnificent, and I can’t help but stare at it for a moment. When I look back at him, I can feel the tears start to gather in the back of my eyes. “You’ve been my saving grace, the one person to light the darkest places inside of me and make me feel whole again. And I know, regardless of what will happen, with you by my side I can face anything.”

  The End

  for now

  Thank you so much for reading, dear reader. You have no idea how much I appreciate it. Sign up for my Newsletter for exclusive sneak peaks and giveaways in the future.

  Acknowledgments

  Fortune may favor the bold, but I couldn’t have done this without my people. I might have put this on paper, but without them, I’d never have hit that pesky publish button. So, thank you, Sandie and Heavenly, for being the best book friends a girl could ever ask for. Your encouragement and endless supply of support will never be forgotten. You’re my tribe, and whether you like it or not you’re stuck with me for the rest of eternity.

  My parents – thank you for your unwavering support. Since day one, you’ve tried to give me every tool in the box to succeed, though I’m not sure it was in order to write smut. You’re my heroes, and always will be.

  My big brother, the best brother a girl could ask for and my inspiration for how a brother, and man, should behave. You’re the best, even when I’m jealous of your genius. Oh, and you better put a ring on it, I could use a sister(-in-law).

  Mary, thank you so much for your support, your eagle eye, and your guidance during this journey. I couldn’t have done this without you. I adore you!

  Annette, you’re the best. Thank you for reading Alex and Duncan on such short notice and helping me make them what they are today. Your keen input helped tighten it up and make it so much better. Thank you so much! I love you and can’t wait to spend this summer drinking wine and talking books with you!

  Melissa, you’ve always been there for me even
before this journey started. You’ve given me a listening ear and made me smile when I needed it. Never change. I love you, girly!

  Loredana and Marla, thank you so much for going through my baby and finding all the plot holes and typos. It wouldn’t be what it is without you. I can’t wait to work with you on my next one!

  Diane, Dora, Marieke, Candice – thank you for your friendship, generosity, and making me laugh on a daily basis. Everyone should have friends like this!

  And last but not least, every blogger, author, and reader who’s taken the time to help me with answering questions, lending me a listening ear, sharing my cover (still not over how much love y’all had for it), letting me pop into your groups to share, reading my baby, and generally being awesome human beings giving a newcomer like me a chance.

  This journey is scary and exciting at the same time, but knowing people out there have my back no matter what is humbling. Thank you for everything! I can’t wait to see where this journey takes me next.

  About the Author

  Kira Berger is a child of the world with a severe case of wanderlust. She’s lived in both North America and Europe. Currently, she’s living in London and enjoys everything the diverse city has to offer.

  She’s always been a dreamer and closet romantic. And after obtaining her MA in English and Publishing, she finally decided to bring the stories floating around in her head and distracting her from real life onto paper.

  If she’s not writing or working – which is pretty much most of the time – she can be found reading, traveling all over the world to visit friends, cuddling with her cat, or riding on the back of her horse through the countryside, preferably during the winter months.

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