"You're beautiful," he whispered. "Always have been, always will be. Do you believe me?"
"Yes," she sighed. She shouldn't have said it, shouldn't encourage him, but she didn't care.
"I've missed the way you taste," Marcus moaned, slowing his assault just enough to allow him to speak. "Have you missed me?"
What was the point in lying? "Yes."
He slid a finger into her, his mouth going to her breasts now. Her grip on him tightened as he sucked a nipple into his mouth, rolling it around his tongue.
"Do you want me?"
A moan broke from her. "Yes."
"I don't have condoms."
"I don't care. Marcus… please…"
He pulled back. With a grin, he unclasped his pants with one hand. Adela's panting grew as he kept up his ministrations with one finger while he began to stroke himself with his free hand. He was so beautiful, that flash of devil in his eye and that sweet, sweet smile on his face. She needed him. She needed him more than she could breath and she jerked her hips up. He hardened quickly, his gaze roving down her body like she was a Greek goddess.
With a moan, he nudged himself inside.
Chapter Six
She felt as good as he remembered. Like coming home. He watched her face as he entered, the way her back arched, thrusting her breasts out as though begging him to take them in his mouth again. The slight flush in her chest, neck and face, turning her pale amber skin a darker shade. Her eyes shone with the familiar desire. Everything tightened further inside of him as he gazed at her beautiful body, the exquisite formation of every curve.
God, it had been so long. Not just since Adela, but anybody. After he and Adela had separated he'd been with a few women, but they never took the edge off his cravings and he eventually just gave up. Only Adela would do.
And now he was with her again.
It wasn't healthy. It was like coming back to a drug that kicked him down and beat him every time he took it. She was addictive and even after all these years he craved her. Being inside of her only made that craving worse, even as he sucked on her waiting breast.
He began moving. Part of him wanted to pull her to the floor and be nothing but animal with her, like he had always been in the past. He wanted to put her on her hands and knees and rut her, not make love, not have sex. To take her so hard that she'd be ruined for anybody else. His tongue swirled around her hard, pointed nipple, making himself keep a slow and steady rhythm. She wasn't his. She had never truly been his. And if this was the last time he was going to have her–and it probably was–then he wanted her to remember him as tender and sweet.
Adela moved in time with him, her hands coasting over his shoulders. Her mouth was slightly open, her pants music to his ears. He sunk in deep again, his body tensing, skin too tight. He needed to make this last. Needed to hold on. His lips traced up her breastbone, over her collarbone. He paused a moment to nip at her neck and her fingers dug into his back.
With a growl, she bit him. She clamped down on him so hard that he couldn't stop himself. He thrust wildly, and as her head lolled back and a strangled scream erupted from her mouth, pleasure washed through him. His body continued to move on its own as everything released.
Eventually he had to stop. He leaned into her chest, panting for breath, as she writhed beneath him.
"Oh," she whispered. Her voice was breathless with a slight edge of panic to it. When he pulled back, he saw her eyes were wide. Her nails still pressed into him, the pressure not easing. "Oh, no."
He tensed again, not pulling out. She was going to tell him to leave and at that moment he didn't know if he could. Both his hands were on her hips and it would be so easy to move one of them between their bodies and stroke her sensitive flesh again, but he stayed still. If she wanted him to leave, then he would have to. He couldn't stay with a mate who didn't want him.
"We shouldn't have done that," she whispered.
His bear roared. Without thinking, he bound his arms around her waist and pushed himself even deeper inside of her. She gasped as he ground against her. No. He couldn't let her go. He had done that once, let her go without even fighting for her. He'd tear down the world for her, he wasn't going to let it happen this way again.
"I don't care. We're meant to be together."
Adela shook her head.
"Listen to me!" He could hear the panic in his own voice. "I don't care. I don't care if Luci is Isaias' daughter. I don't care. I still love you and I will be the best mate and father I can be. I love you."
Her eyes fluttered shut. "You don't."
"I do."
"No." Adela pressed both her hands against his chest but didn't push him away. "No, you don't. Because you never trusted me. No matter what I told you, you insisted on continually asking me about Isaias and you were never satisfied with my answers."
A tendril of anger wormed its way into his chest. "Are you saying that it's my fault that you slept with him? Because I was concerned that he was—"
"And as for being a father, how are you going to do that?" she continued. "A good father doesn't go get drunk and then decide to stalk his ex-girlfriend's house. The way you've been behaving would be really creepy if it was anybody but you… forget that. Even though it is you, it's still unnerving. A girl doesn't like to feel like she is being watched all the time. And I can't really see you trading in your bike for a minivan."
Marcus's shoulders bunched. "Can't you feel it, Adela? The way we are together? This. We fit together so perfectly even after three years apart."
"And all the fights and—"
"I'm not the same hothead I was before." He thought about the fight he'd gotten into just the last night. "I'm not saying that I won't defend myself if I'm attacked, but I'm not picking fights anymore. Please, Adela. If you'll just give me a chance, you'll see."
She sucked her lower lip between her teeth. The hesitation on her face was too much. How couldn't she see that they were made for each other? She had to know! He thrust himself against her hard, moving to kiss her. Her arms stiffened, elbows pushing in to straighten and hold him off. Her eyes flashed and she shook her head.
"You need to learn boundaries. Now get out of me, we can't do it like this."
Marcus eased himself out. Adela grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around herself, not looking at him. Tears shone in her eyes and he did his pants back up. Her stomach twisted and he looked at the floor.
"I'm sorry," he finally said. "You used to like it when I would just grab you and kiss you. I shouldn’t have assumed that it would be the same now."
"I did like it," she whispered. "I'd probably still like it. I like having a dominating man. But we never talked. Every time we started to have a disagreement, we ended up having sex instead. We were like a couple of animals half the time. I need more than sex in my life, Marcus. I need more than words. I'm a mother and if I can't even tell you…"
"Tell me what?"
She turned her face away and shook her head. "It's nothing. You lost your chance three years ago."
That couldn't be the end. His bear roared, battering against his chest. He reached for her hands but she pulled back out of his reach. Desperation choked him and his fingers curled into his palms. How could he show her that things were different now if she wasn't going to let go of the past? He was willing to forget about it. He was willing to pretend it had never happened.
"Things change," he said. "People change. I'm not the same guy I was back then. When I heard about the plot to kidnap you, when I thought I was going to lose you… I'd take a hundred bullets to the chest before I ever would go through something like that again."
"You had already lost me."
"Please. Please, I'm begging you. Give me one more chance. Please." He bowed his head, unable to stop the tears in his eyes and not wanting her to see his weakness. "Please."
A long moment of silence answered him. For a wild moment he thought it was going to do no good, that she was going to send him away regardle
ss. Then her small hand cupped his cheek.
"I don't think I've ever heard you beg for anything before. You always had to be Mr. Tough Guy, too strong for the world to handle…" She sighed. "Okay. Okay, you can have one more chance. But we can't have sex and you have to trust me."
Trust her. He caught her hand and kissed it. His heart soared. It was an easy task for such a great reward. And he did trust her. He always had—
Unbidden, the thought of Isaias Durant came to his mind. So far, he was still out of the country, something about a prolonged honeymoon. What would they do when he came back? Could he really share the task of being Luci's father with someone who would just toss Adela aside after getting her pregnant?
And she asked him to trust her despite what had happened.
A cold icicle of doubt slipped into his stomach but he shook the thoughts out of his mind. That was in the past. He trusted her not to make that mistake again, just like she was trusting him not to make his mistakes again. It was going to be beautiful, and he was going to have his mate.
He smiled up at her and she smiled back, her lip still caught between her teeth. The blanket gaped slightly, showing off her magnificent body, but she had said no sex. That meant, no matter how much he wanted to take her again right now, he wasn't going to touch her until she was dressed. Otherwise the temptation would just be too much.
"So." She gave him a hesitant smile. "I guess this means we're going to try dating again."
"Yeah."
Adela brushed her hair from her face. "So where do we start?"
Marcus moved to the couch beside her, noticing how her eyes tracked his movement. She was already regretting the no-sex rule, he could see it. He wasn't going to tempt her, though, so he put some distance between them. Her nose wrinkled for the briefest moment before her expression smoothed out.
"Well, do you want to get to know each other again slowly?" he asked. "Or do you want to see how the three of us work as a family unit? Luci is obviously a big part of this, and if she doesn't like me there's no point in trying to make it work."
The thought made his heart clench, but there was no way he was going to force his presence into the life of someone who didn't want him there. Yeah, Luci was only a toddler but so was he when his mom met his stepdad. From the stories she told, he hadn't liked him from the start and that never changed. He wasn't going to put them all through that sort of stress.
"Family? Maybe not," Adela muttered, dropping her gaze. "But I do want to see how you get along with Luci. Maybe we can go to an amusement park or something together. There's one just out of town that has a lot of rides that are gentle enough for Luci to go on."
Marcus nodded. He grinned at her. "It's a date, then. Now. Do you want me to help with breakfast or to clear out before Luci gets up?"
He winked and Adela flushed again. She laughed. "I have today off, so let's go to the park. I'm going to shower. Pancake mix is in the cupboard above the stove."
As she scampered off, Marcus went to the stove and began getting everything together. His smile widened as he found the mix and a large bowl. His bear rested peacefully, confident that he had his mate back.
Chapter Seven
The day went by so quickly it seemed like they had just arrived at the park when it was time to go home.
"That was fun," Marcus whispered as she parked her car at her house. "Luci certainly had fun. Is she always that loud?"
"No. Sometimes she's louder." Adela smiled.
Marcus chuckled.
It was still the middle of the day, but with Luci's lack of sleep the previous night she started to get cranky in the early afternoon. There wasn't really any point to continuing on while she was getting grumpier and grumpier, so they had packed up and went back. Luci had fallen asleep on the way home, and now Marcus gently picked her up out of her car seat.
Luci stirred, making a protesting noise, but rested her head on Marcus' shoulder and let out a sigh. Adela watched, smiling at how gentle he was. It really warmed her heart to see the two of them together. Luci had taken to Marcus at once, although it was clear that the big, tattooed, muscly bear wasn't always certain of how to react to her.
He'd learn, though. She hadn't known how to be a mother at first. Marcus clearly wanted to be a father, even if he thought Luci had been created by another man. And although his eagerness was a good thing, she couldn't help but have a twinge of anxiety as she followed them into the house.
Marcus still thought that Isaias was Luci's father. And after these years, it didn't seem like he had any intention of asking her if his assumptions were correct. Although, she mused, he probably expected that if it wasn't true she would have told him by now.
And if she did tell him?
He was going to be angry with her for all the years of silence. That was a given, and she would have to deal with it. That was her mistake, her lie of omission. She should have told him before now. But maybe it was a good thing. She knew he came back to her because he wanted to be in her life, in Luci's life, and not because he thought he had to.
When she told him the truth, would it change the dynamics between them? She asked him to trust her and yet here she was, carrying on a lie. Would he believe her? It hurt to think that he might still cling to his mistaken beliefs even after she told him the truth.
I don't trust him, she thought, her heart sinking. How can I tell him to trust me when I don't trust him?
She sighed heavily as Marcus laid Luci in her crib. The toddler stirred but sank back to sleep quickly.
"She's really sleepy, isn't she?" Marcus whispered.
"Shhh." Adela watched anxiously, but Luci didn't stir.
Marcus took Adela's hand and pulled her from the room, his eyes sparkling, and a naughty smile on his lips. He closed the door softly then picked her up, earning a yelp. His muscles bulged more than they used to, but he didn't even breathe heavily as he carried her to the couch.
The scene of their lovemaking–no, it was just sex- it wasn't lovemaking until they said they loved each other. He sat, keeping her legs straddling him, and ran his hands up her back. When they reached her shoulders he pulled her in, his mouth seeking out hers. She allowed herself a couple of small kisses before she pulled back and shook her head.
"No sex, remember?"
"This isn't sex. It's just kissing."
Adela sighed and pulled away from him. "I don't want to get this all mixed up before we have a chance to work things through. To pretend we don’t have baggage would be futile. We need to talk before this gets any further. I don't want either of us to get hurt."
His hands moved to her hips but he nodded.
Well, this was it. She sucked in a deep breath, wondering how to say this. Just blurt it out? Beat around the bushes until he figured it out himself? First state that Isaias wasn't Luci's father and reiterate that he was always like a brother to her and the thought of sleeping with him was basically incest?
"Marcus—"
Her cellphone rang. Adela grabbed it, grateful for a brief interlude. It was silly to put it off, but maybe a few minutes would help her gather her thoughts. She slid off of Marcus' lap as she answered.
"Hey," a male voice said on the other end. "Sorry about this, but I'm going to be hung up at work for longer than I thought. Is it okay if I pick you up at eight instead of seven? We'll have to catch a later movie, but this project just can't be put on hold."
The blood drained from Adela's face. Greg. Her date. Shit! She had forgotten all about it. What was she meant to do now? Should she cancel?
"Adela?" Greg pressed. "You still there."
"Yeah. I'm here." Her wide eyes turned to Marcus, who stared at her with his mouth slightly open. "Eight is fine. I'm busy right now, can't talk. I'll see you later."
She hung up. Before she could speak, though, Marcus growled low in his throat.
"You have a date."
"Yes."
He dragged a hand through his hair and growled again. His muscles roped as h
e tensed. "So… what? You're dating someone else and you decide to string me along anyway?"
Adela could feel the familiar anger welling in her. Once again, he proved he couldn’t help but think the worse of her. She sucked in a deep breath, holding in everything she wanted to say to him. He didn't get to waltz back into her life, ignite all these old feelings, sleep with her, and then decide that she was some cheating slut.
"For your information, I'm not dating someone else. This is the first date I've been on in months—" Years, but she wasn't going to tell him that. "—and after what happened last night, I honestly forgot about it."
"But you're still going out with him."
She pushed herself back into the couch. If he was going to be like this, then she wasn't going to make an effort to break off the date before it happened. It would be rude to break if off now, though. She had made the commitment before Marcus decided to show up in her life again.
"Yeah."
Marcus' eyes flashed but he nodded. "Right. Of course. Because you don't owe me anything."
Adela flinched. "I'm going to go out for dinner and I'm going to awkwardly tell him that I don't think it's a good idea for us to date and we're going to skip the movie and I'm going to come home."
Why was she placating him? Like he said, she didn't owe him anything. Why did her life suddenly have to revolve around him like this again?
"Not that it should matter to you," she added nastily. "I'm not going to throw away everything in my life before you decided to grace me with your presence again."
His nostrils flared and he growled. "Oh, yeah? So, who else is there?"
"You're making it difficult for me to see why I should tell my date that I can't see him again."
"Who else is there?"
"Nobody! There is nobody else."
And there wasn't. She hated it, but there was no one for her besides this stupid, stupid bear who wouldn't listen to her. This unhealthy relationship of mistrust and secrets was the only one she wanted. What did that make her? A masochist? Just plain dumb?
The Bear Shifter's Second Chance Page 4