Begin Again (Beautiful #2)

by Bester, Tamsyn

  “Demetria.”

  Brody said my name like it was a treasure, like he needed to protect it. He was the only person who ever used my full name, even when we’d made love he’d called it out. It unraveled me. I stood frozen for a brief moment until my brain started shouting commands and my legs moved. In my hurry to get away, I smacked into the waitress walking past me and we ended up in a heap on the floor. Brody’s girlfriend snickered behind her perfectly manicured fingers, while I prayed for a hole to appear in the floor that would swallow me. The front of my tank top was covered in cold coffee and under normal circumstances I would have gagged but my need to flea overpowered every other useless thought bouncing around in my head. I muttered “sorry” to the waitress, ignoring her scowl, and scrambled my way out of the bakery. I walked as quickly as I could and yet fate felt the need to prolong my torture just a little bit longer.

  “Demetria, wait!”

  Really? He couldn’t just let me get away? I huffed and spun on the heel of my running shoe, missing his chest by millimeters. I could smell his cologne and recognized the scent easily. It was a bottle of Ralph Lauren ‘Polo Blue’ and it smelled like clean, fresh water mixed with Brody. It was my favorite on him.

  “What?” I snapped. I didn’t care if I should’ve been more polite because I sure as hell didn’t feel like being nice. It had everything to do with seeing Brody again after all this time and making a complete ass of myself, but it also had to do with how easily he got me riled up.

  “Weren’t you going to say hi?” he asked, a hurt look on his face. What? He’s hurt?

  “No, I wasn’t. You looked a little preoccupied and I was hoping you wouldn’t see me.”

  Brody sighed and pulled his fingers through his hair. Part of me was relieved because that small action meant he was the one who mussed up his own hair, not that stupid blonde bimbo.

  “I knew you were there before we walked in and what you saw with Sienna wasn’t at all what you think it was.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest and stuck my chin out defiantly. “It doesn’t matter what I thought, Brody. I know you’re with someone else. I was just hoping - ” I stopped myself before I said something I would regret. Seeing him with someone else was killing me inside, so much so that I had no idea how I was still keeping it together with him standing so damn close. But I didn’t want him to know that I was hurting, I was too proud to let him see that. So I put on a front and pretended that I didn’t care at all. The only problem with that was I didn’t know what hurt more – seeing him with someone else or pretending that I didn’t care.

  “Are you with Jeff?” he snapped, trampling all over my thoughts.

  I gasped, remembering that it was Brody who I saw standing outside my house last night.

  “It was you,” I said quietly. “Why were you there?”

  “I wanted to see you, so that we could avoid something like this, but when I got there I saw you inside with Jeff and - ”

  “He’s a friend and if he were any more than that it would have nothing to do with you. You have no right to anything in my life anymore.” My throat thickened at the last part and I knew it was a partial lie. There was still too much he had a right to know but I just wasn’t ready to tell him. I wasn’t sure if I would ever be ready. Brody stared at me and I saw the hurt and anger swirling in his brown eyes.

  “You know what, I can’t do this right now,” I said, breaking eye contact. “I apologize if you were offended, but you knew it would be like this when we saw each other. I don’t know what more you want from me.”

  Brody snorted and I looked up to see him glaring. He was about to speak but I stopped him. “You’d better get going,” I said, peering around his body. It was a little bigger than I remembered, his arms and chest a little more defined. Malibu Barbie was spiting daggers in my direction with her eyes. “Your girlfriend clearly knows who I am, and doesn’t like that you’re talking to me.”

  I turned to leave but Brody’s hand wrapped around my upper arm and he pulled me into his chest. My body’s reaction was immediate, like it was natural instinct to be that close to him. “I don’t give a fuck about her, Demetria. This conversation is far from over.”

  With that, he turned and left, stalking down the sidewalk. I sucked in a lung full of air as if I’d been deprived of it and walked away on shaky legs. That didn’t go nearly as bad as I had expected but it had shaken me enough to wonder if I could handle being around Brody at all.

  “Did you have to do that?”

  I turned to look at Sienna. Her arms were crossed over her chest and she was scowling. I was still reeling from seeing Demetria again and almost forgot that Sienna was there.

  “Do what?” I asked, confused.

  “Run after your ex like a dog in heat,” she snapped. Irritation swirled in my chest and collided head first with the part of me trying not to put Sienna back on a plane back to Chicago. Having her here would only complicate things.

  “I didn’t run after her,” I replied harshly. “I had to speak to her.”

  Sienna huffed and for the first time she looked more like a petulant child, rather than the sophisticated businesswoman I had come to know. I asked myself what I ever saw in her to begin with and the answer was the same as it always was: she filled a space and soothed the constant ache, even if it was temporarily.

  “I don’t like that.”

  I resisted the urge to throw my head back and laugh. “I don’t care. I told you I’d have to talk to her at some point while I was in town. Now stop pouting like a baby and get over it, Sienna. You have no say in whether or not I speak to her. It would be best if you remember that.”

  I walked past her, ignoring the glare she threw my way, and walked into the coffee shop. Huntley’s aunt, Emma, was standing behind the counter and I knew she’d been watching the encounter. The look in her eyes told me she wasn’t at all pleased with me. Little did she know that no one could be more displeased with me than I was with myself. I should have stayed in Chicago, even if it meant missing Grayson’s wedding, but the chance to see Demetria after so long was too alluring to pass up.

  I STOPPED MY TRUCK outside the old farmhouse that was my home growing up and climbed out. Sienna had been giving me the silent treatment all day and for once the silence didn’t bother me. She could stay in my truck for the rest of the afternoon for all I cared. I wasn’t exactly looking forward to introducing her to my grandmother anyway. I knew they wouldn’t get along. That might’ve had more to do with the fact that my grandmother adored Demetria and thought no other women would ever be better for me. I didn’t disagree, but I couldn’t exactly tell Sienna that. I took a walk around the front of the house to the porch and that’s when I noticed Demetrias’ red Lexus.

  “Ah hell,” I muttered. “This isn’t going to end well.” I heard the sound of footsteps behind me and the uneven click of heals on the dirt told me I didn’t need to look back to know it was Sienna. She followed me up the porch steps without saying a word and came to stand at my side while I knocked on the door.

  “It’s open.” My grandmothers’ voice still sounded the same and hearing it brought a smile to my face. I opened the screen door and walked in, not bothering to make sure that Sienna was following me. When I walked into the living room I found my grandparents in a heated discussion. They both stopped talking as soon as they saw me.

  “Brody!” my grandmother, Luanne, gasped and rushed towards me. She wrapped her thin arms around my waist and hugged me. I relaxed and felt the familiar sense of safety the comfort of her arms had always given me as a child. I kissed her grey hair that was tied up in a neat bun and returned her embrace.

  “I’m so happy to see you,” she whispered. The hitch in her voice made my chest ache. I’d missed her so much and carried so much guilt for leaving them. Luanne Scott was an incredible woman and I could not have asked for a better mother figure.

  “I’ve missed you, Gama,” I replied. My grandfather, Clay, cleared his throat and
I looked up to find him watching us. His eyes were glossed and he looked thinner and more tired than I’d remembered. My grandmother let me go and wiped her tears. “I’m a silly woman,” she sniffled. “I shouldn’t be getting all emotional like that.” I rubbed her back as my grandfather stepped closer. He pulled me into a strong hug and it took me a moment to return it. I was a little shocked. Clay Scott wasn’t an affectionate man, unless it came to my grandmother. But something about the way his big arms engulfed me made me feel like the six year old boy again, the one who had to accept that his parents didn’t want him. “Good to have you have you home, son.”

  I pulled away and held him at arms length. “You too, Gramps. You look good for an old man,” I joked.

  He laughed and my smile only broadened. “Who have you got here?” he asked, looking past me. I turned to see Sienna watching us rather awkwardly. She was a duck out of water here and it only made me question my decision to get involved with her. Her eyes told me she was pissed, but she plastered on a fake ass smile and stuck out her hand. “I’m Sienna,” she said, shaking my grandmothers hand. My grandmother’s expression was laughable and I could tell she wasn’t impressed by Sienna. Unlike most people, my grandparents weren’t as easily charmed and the only person who had managed to win them over was Demetria. “I’m Brody’s girlfriend.”

  I froze, my thoughts of Demi halting at the term Sienna used to describe herself.

  “It’s nice to meet you dear,” my grandmother said politely. I knew better. As soon as she had the chance she was going to lay into me.

  “I’ve heard so much about you,” Sienna said, reaching to shake my grandfathers’ hand. Her tone was clinical and detached, like this was a business transaction rather than a sincere introduction to two of the most important people in my life.

  “That’s funny,” my grandfather replied, looking Sienna in the eye. “Because we’ve heard nothing about you.”

  She gasped, and I sucked in a laugh. My grandmother slapped my grandfather’s chest, but the need to laugh was etched in the wrinkles around her mouth. Sienna politely excused herself, spun on her heal and stormed out of the house, muttering curse words under her breath.

  “Thanks Gramps,” I groaned. He shrugged and replied, “Not my fault the stick up her butt leaves no room for a sense of humor.” I chuckled because well, it was funny, and walked outside to find Sienna. My foot hit the second step of the porch when a scream pierced my ears. I knew that voice anywhere. I ran around the side of the house where the barn was situated, and increased my pace when I saw Demi rolling on the ground with Jeff on top of her.

  “NO!” she screamed. “Please, Jeff! NO! STOP!”

  I couldn’t see her face but seeing her with him made my blood boil in the worst way. I didn’t want another man touching her, whether I had a right to feel that way or not. I grabbed Jeff’s shoulder and hauled him up to his feet.

  “Brody, what the - ” Jeff’s words were cut off by the sound of my fist making contact with his jaw and his body hitting the ground. He jumped up quickly and tackled me to the ground. The wind was knocked out of my lungs and I barely had enough time before Jeff’s knuckles hit the side of my face. Demi and Sienna started shouting at us but we didn’t stop. I rolled us over, straddling Jeff’s waist, and hit him again. The faint crack of his nose should’ve stopped me, but all I could think about was his hands on Demi and my rage bubbled over. Two strong arms wrapped around my chest and pulled hard enough to get me away from Jeff. I looked over my shoulder and saw Grayson holding me back. I was so focused on smashing Jeff’s face that I didn’t notice Huntley and Grayson had pulled up to the farmhouse.

  “Oh my god!” Demi yelled, scrambling to where Jeff was lying on his back. He had blood running down his nose and over his mouth. If Grayson didn’t look so pissed I would’ve been happy that I’d just broken his brother’s nose for no reason. “Are you okay?” she asked him. The way she looked at him with concern made my anger rise and I had the urge to punch him again.

  “Yeah,” Jeff replied, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. “I’m fine.” Demi helped him up and I hated it.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?” Demi asked me. “What did you do that for?”

  “What the hell is going on here?” my grandfathers voice boomed and we all turned to see him approaching us.

  “Let me go,” I growled at Grayson.

  “Not if you’re planning on hitting my brother again,” he replied angrily.

  I shook my head. “I won’t.”

  Grayson let go of me and took a step towards Jeff. “Let’s get you cleaned up,” he said. He gave me a look of disapproval. “We’ll talk about this later, Brody.”

  I watched them walk to the house and disappear inside. I was left alone with my grandfather and Sienna.

  “You want to tell what that was about?” he asked. The disappointment in his voice hung heavily in the air. I couldn’t explain my way out of this one. While I knew I’d fucked up, I couldn’t regret it.

  “No, sir,” I replied.

  He snorted and shook his head. “I’m no fool, son. A man could be blind and still see what made you fly off the bandwagon for no rhyme or reason. I suggest you and your friend get going,” his disliking of Sienna didn’t go unnoticed but I’d expected it. He disliked anyone who wasn’t…

  “You’ve worn out your welcome for today.” Just like that my grandfather had dismissed me and I knew I deserved it. He’d always taught me that a man who used his fists to solve his problems was not a man. Sienna stalked towards the car and slammed the door as soon as she climbed in. Great. Now I had to deal with her bullshit too. I was about to make my way towards the car when I saw Demi storming down the porch steps and headed straight towards me. Her red hair flew in all directions and her face was screwed into a scowl, but all I could think was that I’d never seen a sexier woman in my life. I should’ve felt guilt, having Sienna waiting for me in the car, but she was the last person I truly cared about.

  “You have some serious balls,” Demi said, hitting my chest with her forefinger. I watched in amazement as she went off on a tirade.

  “What the hell is your problem? You broke Jeff’s nose!”

  I grabbed her arm and dragged her around the other side of the house until we were both out of sight. She glared up at me and my eyes dropped to her mouth and then her heaving chest. I stepped forward and before I could second guess myself, I did the one thing I knew I couldn’t resist. I kissed her.

  Brody’s mouth crushed mine and while my brain shouted at me to stop, my body responded the only way it ever would when it came to Brody. His tongue traced the seam of my lips and I opened up for him, allowing him to explore the contours of my mouth. His hand came to rest at my nape, while the other cupped my hip and pulled me closer to him. What we were doing was wrong, but I couldn’t rationalize it that way when my heart believed it was right.

  Everything else around me disappeared as my blood started humming in my veins, making me feel feverish. Brody moaned into my mouth and in that moment it felt as if he was breathing life into me. I inhaled, swallowing his scent greedily, silently begging for more. But I knew more with Brody would never be enough. I’d learned that very early on. I had no doubt that his kiss alone made my panties wet and slick with desire. My breasts grew heavy and tender, aching for his touch. It had been so long and my body knew it. I experienced a total loss of control around Brody, which only made stopping that much harder. It was when his lips left a hot, moist trail down my neck that reality came crashing down. What was I doing? I pulled away, breathless with swollen lips.

  “You shouldn’t have done that,” I said, my voice shaky and quiet.

  “I wasn’t the only one enjoying it,” he retorted with a smirk. My hand came up, poised to slap him, but he grabbed my wrist before I could.

  “Now now, there’s no need for violence.”

  “That’s rich,” I bit out, suddenly angry. “It’s okay for you to punch whoever you want f
or no Goddamn reason, but when I want to then I’m being violent.”

  Brody leaned in close, our noses touching. “He had it coming.”

  “So did you! What possessed you act like such an asshole, Brody?”

  “Like you’d believe me.” His voice softened, as did his eyes.

  “Try me,” I replied, “because from what I saw, you hit him because you felt like it!”

  He had the decency to look sheepish when he replied, “I thought he was…hurting you.”

  I snatched my hand out of his grasp and took a much-needed step back. My head was swimming from our heated kiss and the anger I started to feel bubbling its way to the surface.

  “Hurting me? Are you fucking kidding me right now? He was tickling me!”

  Something on Brody’s face changed and his expression became unreadable. It was unnerving. I’d always been able to read him, no matter what expression was on his face. The face looking back at me was blank, and I hated it. More than I’d ever admit, even to myself.

  “Forgive me for wanting to protect you,” Brody sneered. My kiss-induced haze had completely evaporated and only white-hot fury remained. Who the hell did he think he was?

  “You lost your right to protect me,” I said harshly, glaring at him. “You walked away and it was Jeff who was there when you weren’t!”

  Brody’s face fell and for a brief moment I felt the need to take the words back. If only taking words back was enough to erase our past. Nothing with Brody and I had ever been that easy.