‘Not I!’ came from all.
‘I wonder why?’ Kane teased.
‘Aye, old man, but now I sees it. Is Creature’s turn and is magic?
‘Nella’s right!’ came call from the crowd and for him to entertain.
‘I cannot have missed it?’ Meddler coquettishly enquired of his dragon.
‘I ask again, Creature, are you right?’
‘Oh, Reuben! I have tales a plenty and have practised them this day! The Frubelling, Reub? The frogs? Gah! You asked why I spoke to them and now I tells you, was to keep it secret and prolong the suspense of a story I have ready.’
A Meddler’s tale then, would surely delight, full of wonderment, magic and histories… surely?
‘Yes! He actually decided that a hat with three sides became three hats!’
‘The Tricorn?’
‘Just so, Nella, and could be worn as such! The value for money is outstanding if nothing else. I call it a convergence of minds, which I say I played no small part in. There now, Nella, that is how you tell a story.’ Proudly he looked about, perhaps a little too vain to look for truths in the vacant expressions about him. ‘You see how exhausted they are? Such a story, Nella, is beyond you I know, but perhaps you may learn something from my manner of telling?’
‘Aye, little one, I have much to learn from it.’
Whilst the elders suppressed laughter, the young ones grew agitated.
‘Read this!’ one shouted, and farted quite spectacularly. Thankfully with much of the child about him, Meddler returned fire and the awkward silence got swept up and tossed in the fire by a swish of Nella’s broom, ceremoniously used in such cases.
‘Harry and Rosie seem to get along well, Reuben.’
‘Aye, Nella, he is a good man – but am sure he has forgotten the time. Harry, is late you know? Will you be staying?’
‘Lord, it is! And I don’t much fancy a ride home in this light so if your generosity still extends? I shall stay?’
Rosie moved off, feigning disinterest.
‘Perhaps you are embarrassed by your own thoughts, ay, girl?’ Nella scornfully remarked. She could be as jealous as any and as company was so scarce, she had hardly had time to absorb the compliments that Harry had paid her earlier.
‘Not that she wants him to herself, Rosie!’ Meddler embarrassingly intervened, ‘it is just that tonight you shine in another’s eyes, whereas normally we hang on Nella’s every word.’
‘Oh shush you, Nella! Your mouth is so open I can hear your food churning!’ Rosie blushed and cursed the wee creature inside.
‘Oh yes? Sure it isn’t your bloomers!’ Nella shook her fist and Meddler openly thought,
‘Even more shameful!’
‘Come on, you two, you will scare me off! I am sure neither sound unpleasant.’ Harry was proving to be a mediator of some worth, and his laughter at the exchange caught the two off guard; they laughed despite themselves. Continuing his course, Harry approached Kane. ‘Tell me, sir’
‘Old Kane or Father, I have no need for titles.’
‘Very well, Old Kane, can you tell a rook from an aged carrion crow? And which would you eat?’
‘Well, now this is proper chat! I think you will find that an aged crow does not exist for is good eating so there I have no need to distinguish! And now that answers both questions.’
‘A man who can summon words like that ought to be poet by royal appointment. And with such taste.’
‘Aye well, if its crow you hanker after I can cook some? Nice bean stew too. I promise you have not had the like!’ Nella bristled with pride and it was really becoming quite embarrassing.
‘And it would be Spanish, of course, dear Nella. You have lost a bit of your accent but are definitely coloured by ancient suns. Tell me, did Rosie arrive with you?’
‘No, Rosie was born here amongst us.’
He turned to a blushing Rosie. ‘Your mama – is?’
‘That’s enough of that!’ Nella grabbed the confused girl. Her mother had passed in childbirth, and her father another agreeable visitor.
‘I do not know, Sir – Nella I suppose?’
‘Aye, I am sure I have forgotten is all. Come on, girl, another dance for our visitor.’
Harry eventually fell in and gave Nella an apologetic look. ‘And Kane? How long has he been here? And where did he come from?’
Reuben stepped in where Nella had, to fuss over a confused Rosie. ‘Oh, Kane been worrying the sheep for longer than I have been here! How old are you for heaven’s sake, old man?’
‘Reuben, if I say that to me you are a myth I was told of when I made faces out of knees, you will not be far off.’
‘That’s either an insult or the hair in your ears tickles your brain, you old fool!’
‘Gentlemen! Shall we drink to ear hair and longevity?’ Harry stood up carefully, a little too much of Nella’s brew.
‘Aye, good idea. Harry and knee people!’ Kane stood up, revealing two of the finest knee people there ever was, whilst Reuben staggered and would soon fall, but Meddler was insistent.
‘Nella, if you please?’
‘No, you, little one? A drink? Are you sure?’
‘Never more so, dear Nella! And all of you, if I could have your attention? I no longer answer to any of these names I shall set forth; Wakanda, Creature, Meddler or wee one! I am Man ! And shall be hereon known as – as? Such a fine name I had for myself and yet now eludes me!’
‘You been at this already haven’t you, my sweet! Reuben, I blame you. We have never, would never! Would you give a nip to a bairn? Aye, you old fool!’
‘Not me, woman, and he is no child – and none own the right to tell him.’
‘No, perhaps you are right but I might at least call this theft!’ She produced an empty bottle, a little rankled at being put down so but when Harry announced that the very brew would inspire any to theft, the moment was lost and Nella’s blushes returned.
***
Kane remarked, as sleep took some, that a better night had never been spent, at least not on his watch. Nella noted a shadow of another lit by Rosie’s light and said all was good but that she would have to be quick to secure him, or at least an heir; for time was short and most still wanted to leave.
Reuben, too tired to argue, grunted his disapproval but slept where he fell and Meddler, still confused, laid a head on the old dragon’s shoulder, tired of thought and tired of meddling.
Chapter 13
‘You are an early one there, Harry! Now, where did you make your bed last night, I wonders?’
‘Good morning, Reuben! I am sure I made it here by the fire, but long after you were gone.’
‘Oh, a blush! Oh I love a blush! Of late I hunt them for treasure, and even myself have recently known some!’
‘Come on, Creature, leave the man be. And no, now would not be a good time to meddle, I am sure we have imaginations enough!’
‘But of course, Reub, your guidance – though unwarranted – is wise, and I am sure we have had blushes enough.’
A good natured man as Harry was, he took it all as he would from brothers and it felt natural to him; he felt lucky. ‘I ought make tracks, do you both join me?’
‘Oh for sure we do, Harry. I will not be long, for have been readying the cart for an hour at least – as you see.’
Reuben delighted in another blush from Harry, and Meddler could not resist.
‘And, Harry, I enjoyed the remains of the fire this morning, for was cold!’
He laughed out loud, defeated. ‘I am sure I don’t know who influences who, now. And now I must find my –’
‘Hat?’
‘Aye, little one, my hat! You could save my blushes by about turning?’
‘Of course, and I do so love to save blushes. I have a collection of nearly ninety!’ He produced a red velvet purse and clutched it close and there was no doubt that it glowed.And as a meddler will never lie or exaggerate, well...
‘Get on with it then! Som
ething wills me to Hares Folly, and I cannot fathom it.’ Reuben was tiring of the banter, as happiness felt uncomfortable to him just of late.
Meddler joined him in the cart, mumbling to himself and shaking his head, and Harry disappeared in search of a hat he never owned.
***
A glowering horizon dogged the three. Harry said that they would not escape it unless they took a short cut. ‘It is not far, just beyond the old oak felled last storm – invisible to the untrained eye, but as a boy I grew to know all.’ He jumped from his mount. ‘Here we are friends, come we shall shave a good hour and a half journeying this way.’
The sad old oak lay like a Saxon warrior who slept where he was slain and as Harry pulled back the bramble, a path of sorts became evident.
‘Well this is just fine, Harry! But tell me, Meddler, why are you so jumpy?’
‘Reuben, Reuben! I would as soon not tell you for can remember, painfully I might add, the last time I thought to pre-warn you.’
‘And you, Harry, do you play games too?’
‘Certainly not, Sir. No, I have no information of what lies ahead, only that it will be quicker.’
‘Come on then, old girl,’ Reuben urged the old cobb on, who stumbled a little on the narrow path. But soon it became less so and was for sure well-trodden.
A small-holding peeped around the corner as they came to a fork in the road.
‘That’s new!’ Harry remarked. ‘Just out of curiosity, gentlemen?’
‘Aye cannot do no harm. Meddler, any danger here?’
‘Reuben, you flatter me in the asking, but no danger. However, I do believe it be odd, and here be goat scrotum!’ He pointed to a row of them tied to a gate and yonder, a house made of whatever was free and could be scavenged.
‘Kick them!’ Reuben warned. ‘They say if you do so, the Devil will turn about face and not haunt you more.’
‘Aye, then we must!’ Harry joined in, but Meddler thought it funnier to untie them and wear them as ears, receiving a scolding look from Reuben.
Through the gate they ventured and tethered the cart and horse, not wishing to subject them to an almost contrived path of sharp bone and stone.
‘Well, look here, Mother, we have visitors!’ A decrepit old man came from within the shack. He gnawed on a rabbit foot and looked as if it be his only fodder, for he ate it with passion and made light work of the tiny bones.
‘Oh, Father! We are lucky – yes? I am sure we are delighted, pilgrims; it is less often that we have visitors! Some refreshment?’ The wife of the unfortunate peered up from a head that rested naturally on her chest and smiled girlishly with a lone tooth.
The daughter proudly stood before them; the biggest of the trio, and more blessed were they for it, for sure she was strong with no diminished proportions. She produced a fourth from behind her skirt, a small and painfully thin youth who giggled as he eyed the three.
‘And this be Fat Joe, Royal Lumpkin! A brother and heir! Mother here begot him of a strange but fair Prince who had her bear his seed, on pain of Father’s death!’
‘So we are led to believe, girl – but we cannot be wholly sure of his lineage and should not risk a charge of heresy by spouting forth to all and sundry!’
‘Aye, Father!’ The girl looked truly horrified. ‘I am sure I don’t know what you heard! Are you, Father?’
‘I am sure I am not, Daughter – and people should not talk so of royalty. We are but good and loyal subjects!’
Blushes of embarrassment turned to indignation and Reuben, still too amused to look up, cursed Meddler for surprises such as this, ‘If your Highness will allow, I am sure some refreshment would be most welcome and in such revered society. Surely ‘tis we who are blessed?’
‘Sir!’ The shrill woman stepped closer to Reuben. ‘Be more guarded we say, with how you banter about these titles!’ She blushed and stepped back, ‘And you, little one, you are a tease, are too! And I am not as thick as I am ugly! Father – see them off!’
‘Go on! Get you, you scoundrels!’ He shoved them with his fork and eyed the meddler with his one good eye. ‘Critter, you are a critter , not a human! See Mother? Look under his hat!’
‘Oh I sees! This is Satan’s work!’ She screamed, looking round for support, but the daughter ran, as did His Royal Highness. On seeing this, she thought better of it herself and was gone, leaving only the old man and his fork. He gave one more prod, quite bravely considering his understanding, and dropped it, hobbling after all and daring not one glance back over his shoulder.
With the upmost respect, of course, the laughter was contained until at least they reached the horses and gate. Harry said he had always wanted a second pair and put the Goats scrotum in his pocket. Meddler remarked that even one pair might have been nice and shook his fist at the Heavens, making Reuben ask a question he had never thought of,
‘He exists then, Creature?’
‘Oh, Reuben! Such a scholarly question. No, I shall not answer it, I enjoy myself too much. But will say faith creates a Heaven in all of us and is nice to enjoy.’
‘That will do, you do not know everything, Creature.’
The Witch’s fingers was the old oak that marked the road that lead to Hares Folly, which from the horizon was certainly enjoying a tempest that satisfied itself magnificently. And all three agreed that it looked unnatural,
‘Of Hell,’ Reuben said, and hurried Bess along as a man destined to be hero often does and often remains unaware.
Chapter 14
‘We could turn back?’
‘Harry? Will you not be expected?’
‘Oh no, Reuben, they never expect him home. Bit of a wild man ay, Harry?’
‘Aye, Meddler, I think so.’
‘Any excuse really, ay Harry? To return to the camp where a certain person sings pretty rhymes over you.’
‘Quit your teasing, Creature.’ Reuben tugged Meddler’s ear. ‘We need no powers to work that one out!’
‘Shall we then, friends? Turn back? I find I have unfinished business.’
‘No, no we carry on, Harry and if you feel pressed to return then you may join us this eve. For now, I need a pie from an obliging baker and to at least tell your mother where you have been hiding. Out of respect.’
‘Aye, aye this journey has a reason, though why can I not deduce it? Why, why, why am I dogged by this fog?’
‘You sound concerned, Meddler?’
‘I am, Harry, but do not know if it’s that I do not see clearly or too clearly. Surely it is enough that I feel dread? Details unnecessary?’
Harry looked confused and a little concerned.
‘Don’t you listen to him, Harry. Or try to work him out, unless you have a year or two to spare!’ Reuben nudged Meddler. ‘Do not worry our new friend, Creature, all is set already. No need to announce at every happening.’
Duly contrite, Meddler doffed his enormous hat and the three journeyed on, never short of tales and adventures to re-tell, which ferried them swiftly back to town.
***
‘The weather, perhaps is a little soggy?’ Meddler offered Harry a reason as to why the house seemed so quiet.
‘Of course.’ Though he still looked worried.
‘Oh!’ Meddler went to speak, but Harry’s mother answered the door and was no need. The colour drained from her face and looked as though she had aged many years. ‘Harry! Harry! Where have you been?’
‘Mama? What is all this? You look distressed!’
‘Quickly, come in my son and you too, I think, Sir.’ For Reuben, seeing the state of things had offered excuse and sensed a private tragedy.
‘Please, Reuben, and your little friend. I feel so claustrophobic!’
Harry kissed his mama and hastened within. Reuben asked Meddler, as Mrs Punch disappeared, ‘What is it?’
‘I cannot bring myself to speak the words, Reuben. It is too horrifying; you must see for yourself.’
Within the darkened parlour, Harry knelt beside a bloodied El
speth, hair matted, at least what was left of it.
A doctor took her hand. ‘She will live. Her fingernails are torn from their bed but will grow back, as will the hair. Her nose is broken. I am sorry child,’ he whispered to her gently, ‘I shall have to set it.’
She looked about her, so pale, considering the blood and was unable to speak.
Harry looked wildly around. ‘Who has done this? What animal?’
‘We do not know. She has not spoken since the early hours, since we found her on the doorstep. You know how she loves to venture out in the mornings. God help me though! Please help me understand!’
‘And what would he say, mama? How would he explain this to you?’ Harry shook with rage and took his sister’s face in his hands. ‘Tell me, my sister, my dear sweet Elspeth, who has done this?’
She looked as if she would speak but her tongue seemed to inhibit her, as though it was too big for her mouth.
‘Is the shock, Harry.’ The doctor looked him in the eye. ‘She will speak again, but I doubt it will be today. I have seen to her injuries and given her something to ease the pain.’
‘Harry,’ Meddler touched his shoulder, ‘it is children who have done this, you can have no recourse.’
‘You know this for sure? For if you do, then I will see to their guardians – tell me !’ He shouted, then softened. ‘Tell me, Meddler – please. What do you know of this?’ Harry grabbed Meddler’s arm and looked white and gaunt, as though he would break.
‘Excuse me, Harry, it is only a feeling – a deduction on the appearance of her injuries. And I am a little psychic, perhaps?’ Meddler covered his indiscretion for although Harry knew more of him, these people did not – not yet, and not until the doctor had gone. Funnily enough, he had put her parents at ease, and as they looked more at their little girl they too saw injuries made from little hands; and so without meddling he achieved all this, and knew some satisfaction over it.
‘I simply see .’ He then deliberately feigned a woeful, psychic attack. ‘I see two girls, watched over by a dark one and his worship fuels them! They wish to use him – later – and will!’
The Meddler Page 8