A Very Witchy Yuletide

by D. Lieber

  The woman’s face was serious as she carefully considered Evergreen’s words. “I understand,” she said finally. “I’m glad you have found that sort of light in your life. So many are lost and looking for hope. May you have peace whatever path you walk on, sister.”

  Evergreen sighed in relief, glad she had reached someone, glad she had met an open heart who understood. “Thank you. I’m glad you have something to get you through as well.”

  Just as Evergreen and the woman shared a warm smile, the others returned. Evergreen stood from the couch and nodded at the woman.

  “Happy holidays,” the woman said.

  “Happy holidays,” Evergreen responded.

  Chapter 42

  Sawyer went back out to Wes’s car to get the last of the groceries. Just as he slipped his hands into the handles of the cloth bags, he heard footsteps behind him, crunching the snow as they approached.

  “I’ve got the rest,” Sawyer said. “But if you could shut the trunk, that would be…”

  His words trailed off as he turned around and saw Eeva standing before him.

  “Sawyer…” she started, her voice soft but clear.

  He flinched at the sound he’d begged for only days prior.

  “I need to—”

  “I have to get these things inside,” Sawyer cut her off mid-sentence.

  “It’s not as if anything will melt,” she argued. “Don’t you have a second?”

  Sawyer shook his head. I can’t do this, he thought, his chest squeezing his lungs so tight it was hard to breathe. “Whatever it is, I’m sure someone else can help you with it.”

  As he walked past her, his mind shouted that he wanted to know what was so important that she would approach him. What could possibly make her ask me for something? Is it the same thing she wanted last night? His mind wanted to know, but his heart didn’t. His heart couldn’t handle her saying his name, couldn’t handle her voice in his ears, couldn’t handle her eyes on him. It was good, old fashioned, self-preservation that made him leave her outside without looking back.

  Sawyer didn’t know what he’d been expecting when he’d brushed Eeva off. If he’d thought she would give up and leave him alone, he had been sorely mistaken.

  For the rest of the day, she watched him, looking for any chance to get him alone. But he was not the same old Sawyer who would just give in. He couldn’t be. And though he wanted nothing more than to take a long walk alone in the woods to ground his emotions, he didn’t dare. He couldn’t afford the possibility that she would follow him. He could barely handle being in the same room with her with the rest of the coven there. He knew if he heard her call to him again, he’d be even more pathetic than he was now.

  As it was, he knew he was hardly holding it together. He knew he would be a wreck once he got home. But at least he could be a wreck all by himself. I don’t want to ruin anyone else’s Yule by being all depressed and miserable, he thought as he narrowly missed being alone with her in the kitchen. Can’t she see that?

  As Sawyer lay on the couch again that night, he counted how many hours he would have to get through before he could leave. A shuffling from the hallway made Sawyer close his eyes.

  “Sawyer?” Eeva murmured.

  He didn’t open them, gritting his teeth against the wave of despair that her whisper brought.

  The shuffling grew louder. “Are you asleep?” she asked.

  He could feel the weight of her presence hanging over him as she got close enough to see whether his eyes were closed. He kept still.

  She sighed and shuffled back from whence she’d come.

  So what if I’m a coward for not wanting to face her, he thought. She ripped my heart out and lit it on fire. She doesn’t even seem to notice how all this is affecting me. So yeah, I pretended to be asleep to get out of talking to her. What is there left to say anyway? She regrets the best thing that has ever happened to me. The thing I longed for the better part of a decade. It’s going to take me more than a few days to get over it.

  Sawyer’s phone dinged with another message from the group chat. His coworkers were still sharing their holiday fun. He sighed and put his phone on silent.

  The following day was set to be a long one. Wes would begin the bulk of his Yule cooking. Everyone would make their Yule charms. And, that evening, they would stay up through the longest night of the year until dawn, as was tradition.

  A hum of excitement hung over the group, though they would all probably take a nap sometime in the afternoon so they could stay up all night.

  Eeva was still trying to get Sawyer’s attention, and Sawyer was still ignoring her, though it got more and more difficult as time went on. After lunch, Dorian brought out the stuff for everyone to make their Yule charms.

  “Everyone have their green cloth and red string?” he asked.

  They nodded, and Wes placed a big mortar and pestle on the dining room table in front of him.

  “All right. This charm is for us to attune to the sun energy that is on the rise. We have bay, cinnamon, and nutmeg.” He dropped equal parts of the herbs and spices into the mortar and began crushing them with the pestle. “Now, when we light our candles during the Yule ritual tomorrow, we’re going to make wishes. But feel free to put some energy into this if there is something you want to manifest.”

  After Dorian had pulverized the ingredients to his satisfaction, he reached into the mortar and took some of the mixture. Then, he placed it at the center of his green cloth and tied it into a sachet with the red string. He passed the mortar to his left so everyone could take some.

  When it reached Sawyer, he took some of the powder and sprinkled it on his cloth. He thought of all the energies associated with the sun. The fiery energy of the sun offers guidance and enlightenment on matters of the heart, he thought. This is what I ask for.

  He tied the green cloth with the red string and put the sachet in his pocket.

  Chapter 43

  After they had made the Yule charms, they split off into smaller groups. Wes had asked Devan and Cory if they wouldn’t mind going into the garage to drill the candle holes into the Yule log. The Yule log would act as a centerpiece during the celebration the following day until the candles burned down to their nubs. Then they would burn the log in the fireplace, saving only a small piece to light next year’s Yule fire. Sawyer got up without a word to join them.

  “Sawyer,” Evergreen called out to him. Her time was running out, and she had less and less luxury to try to speak to him alone.

  Tara, Cassandra, and Hazel, who were sitting on the couch, looked over at him. Evergreen kept her smile internal when he turned back to her, the peacemaker inside him unable to snub her with an audience.

  “I’m still not comfortable with the holly king and oak king dance, and it’s tomorrow. Do you mind going over it with me one more time?”

  Evergreen couldn’t see his face, but she could feel his frustration at having been cornered.

  “You were fine the other day,” he hedged.

  “Well, we never finished the other day, and I want to make sure I get the last part down.”

  He sighed. “Yeah, all right.”

  “The meditation room is free, and it’s pretty cold outside. Let’s go in there,” Evergreen suggested.

  She led the way, and he pushed their sleeping bags to the side to make room before he faced her.

  “Where are the staves?” he asked, looking around when she wasn’t holding them.

  Evergreen paused for a moment. “I lied about the dance,” she murmured. “I just wanted to talk to you, and I didn’t know another way of getting you alone.”

  Sawyer turned on his heel to leave without a word.

  Panic lurched in Evergreen’s stomach and climbed up her throat. “It wasn’t a mistake,” she said in a rush to get it out before he could leave.

  Sawyer froze but didn’t turn back to face her.

  She tried to get out as much as she could while she still had time. “I acciden
tally saw a text on your phone and thought it was from your girlfriend. I don’t regret what happened between us. The truth…the truth is I’ve been wanting it to happen for a long time, practically as long as I’ve known you.”

  There was a heavy silence, and Evergreen continued, her voice softer but still audible. “I love you, Sawyer.” She laughed bitterly at herself. “I’ve always loved you. I’m so—”

  Her apology was cut off as Sawyer spun around and crushed his mouth to hers. A relieved ache welled up in her chest, and tears rolled down her cheeks as she pulled him closer. A half sigh, half sob escaped her lips, and Sawyer broke their kiss, resting his forehead against hers.

  “Don’t cry, Eeva,” he murmured, wiping her tears away. “I love you, too. I’ve loved you since I was a stupid teenage boy too shy to tell you how I felt.”

  Evergreen inhaled a shaky breath, his words making her tears flow harder. “Is that true?” she asked, her voice thick and nasally as her nose stuffed.

  “It is,” he assured, his amber eyes serious and true as he stared into hers.

  She smiled through her tears. “I thought I’d fucked it all up,” she told him. “I thought you’d never talk to me again.”

  He hushed her soothingly, stroking her hair.

  Her breathing gradually evened out, and her eyes dried. “Will you kiss me again?” she murmured.

  His smile warmed her chest.

  “As many times as you want.”

  Sawyer kissed her sweetly, kissed her gently. And he continued to kiss her until her heated blood wanted more.

  “Lock the door,” she urged as she gasped for air.

  He was gone but a moment, and then he was back with his arms around her as he trailed his lips down her neck.

  He lifted her off her feet, and she wrapped her legs around him. His hot body pressed her against the cold glass of the meditation room wall as he drowned her in kisses.

  “Do you have a condom?” he asked against her neck, his breath fogging up the window as he ground his ready cock against her equally ready core.

  “Do you think we’re the kind of Pagans who don’t have contraceptives in the altar room?” she countered with a smirk.

  “Where?” His voice was deep and husky, urgent.

  The sound raised the hairs on her neck and arms, making her shiver. “In the cabinet,” she breathed.

  He didn’t leave her but carried her over to the altar and laid her down before it, twisting at the torso to reach into the altar cabinet without having to untangle himself from her legs.

  But as Sawyer fumbled with the wrapper, Evergreen released his torso and removed her pants and underwear. Before she’d even fully let go of the fabric, Sawyer slid deep inside her.

  She gasped, and he smothered her moan with his mouth. Her mind went fuzzy as he settled atop her, his weight solid and real on her chest. Once he was inside her, he slowed to a steady rock, his face hovering over hers so she could see every smile, every bite of the lip, every loving glance from his amber eyes.

  Evergreen had a hard time keeping quiet as Sawyer led her to her peak. But once they were finished, she was too satiated to care if anyone had heard her as Sawyer fluttered kisses on her face and neck.

  “I have so much to tell you,” she murmured, as she lay in his arms atop one of the sleeping bags.

  “We have more than enough time,” he assured. “Even when we leave, we can see each other after work and on the weekends. You don’t have to rush to say everything at once.”

  Evergreen pulled back, frowning. “But how are we going to see each other that often? You live so far away.”

  “No, I don’t,” he informed. “I live in Marshton same as you.”

  Evergreen sat up and looked down at him. “What? When? How?” she demanded.

  “I moved there last year when I got the job at the rehabilitation center.”

  Evergreen’s eyes still held many questions.

  Sawyer chuckled, pulling her down to him and kissing her on the mouth. “We have time,” he repeated.

  Chapter 44

  “We should probably head out there. Don’t you think?” Eeva said, not making a move to back up her statement. “It’s already dark out. Even if they took naps to be able to stay up all night, they would be awake by now.”

  Sawyer tightening his arms around her. “We don’t have to,” he said with a tone of finality.

  Eeva giggled, the sound making his heart feel light. “We’re supposed to be spending Yule together with everybody.”

  “Yule is tomorrow. We can spend it with everyone tomorrow. Nope. I’ve shared you with them too long already.”

  Eeva smiled, snuggling in closer to him. “As long as you don’t think anyone will come knocking.”

  “Your mom is the one who told us to lock the door,” he said.

  “That’s true.” She laughed.

  They were both quiet for a moment before Eeva said, “It’s a little early, but can I give you your Yule present now?”

  Sawyer pulled away, glancing down at her. “Did you get me a gift?”

  She smiled and nodded. Then she wiggled out of his arms and went to her suitcase. He sat up as she dug through. She returned shortly after with a paper shopping bag from Toil and Trouble.

  “Open it,” she urged, holding it out to him.

  He felt himself grin as his heart squeezed in anticipation. He pulled out the tissue paper and reached into the bag. His fingers closed around a cool metal object. He took it out.

  A shiny copper pentacle hung on a smooth black cord.

  “It’s to replace the one you gave to Sol. I think this one suits you better, too. The copper will go so nice with your hair color.”

  He clasped the necklace around his neck. “Thank you, Eeva,” he said earnestly. “I love it.”

  Her answering smile was an even better gift. “I know I was being kind of a brat before we all went shopping. So don’t worry about getting me anything.”

  Sawyer tilted his head. “What makes you think I don’t already have something for you?” he asked. He went over to his bag and got Eeva’s gifts before returning and setting them out before her.

  She raised her eyebrows. “What? So many? You didn’t have to.”

  “Oh, these aren’t all from this year. I got you a gift every year…” he trailed off, suddenly embarrassed.

  Her smile widened. “You did?”

  He nodded, trying to ignore the slight heat he felt in his cheeks.

  “Which was the one from the first year?” she asked.

  He stared down at the packages and pointed at the small packet wrapped in what was once a brown paper bag.

  She unwrapped it, and pulled out the quartz pendulum he’d gotten her his first Yule away.

  “It has stones for each of the chakras,” he told her. “And it has a clasp at the end, so you can wear it as a bracelet, too.”

  “It’s adorable,” she complimented.

  “This one is next,” he said before she was even done admiring her first gift. He offered her the one that was most square.

  She unwrapped it, revealing a coffee cup that read, “Hex the Patriarchy.” Her lips mouthed the words, and she burst out laughing.

  His chest warmed at the sound. “I knew you’d like that,” he said. “Now this one.” He handed her the squishiest one.

  She put the mug down beside her and unwrapped the red drawstring bag. “What’s in here?” she asked, opening the bag. “Oh!” she gasped. “Did you make these?”

  He nodded as she shook some of the wooden runes into her palm.

  “They’re beautiful!” she exclaimed. “My very own runes. You’re going to have to help me practice.”

  “I will,” he promised.

  “Is this one next?” she pointed at the rectangle one beside the Toil and Trouble bag.

  “Yes.”

  She gasped when she unwrapped the hand-carved tarot box he’d made. “Sawyer, how long did this take you? It’s gorgeous.”

&
nbsp; Sawyer shrugged, embarrassed but pleased at her reaction. “Last one,” he urged, pushing the bag toward her.

  “I feel spoiled already,” she said with a smile, reaching her hand into the bag and pulling out the mistletoe hairpin.

  “Clover said it was real mistletoe,” he explained as she smiled and stroked the smooth resin.

  “Is it?” she asked, dangling the hairpin over her head and raising her eyebrows at him expectantly.

  He leaned over and kissed her once, twice, five times, one for every Yule since he’d last seen her.

  Eeva snuggled up beside him, resting her head on his shoulder. They sat like that for a while, quiet and comfortable in each other’s company. Then, she slipped her hand under his shirt. He shivered as she stroked his stomach slow and deliberate.

  “You know,” she murmured. “I’m not very good at staying up all night. I think you’re going to have to keep me occupied so I don’t fall asleep.”

  Sawyer’s manhood stiffened. “How many hours until dawn?” he asked.

  “Hmm, longest night of the year? Give or take fourteen hours.”

  “I’m going to be honest with you. I might have to take some breaks, but I’m willing to try my very best.”

  “I believe in you,” she murmured right before she pressed a hungry kiss to his lips.

  By the time the eastern horizon started to lighten on December the twenty-first, Sawyer felt confident he’d made up for not being honest with Eeva for all those years.

  They pulled on their rumpled clothes and shuffled to the living room like two creatures emerging from a winter’s long hibernation.

  “Where is everyone?” Eeva asked, blinking at the empty room.