The thought terrified me after his brush-off at dinner. For an intelligent man, I’d been sidestepping labeling my feelings and acting dumb. I thought that was the safe play. It seemed I was wrong, because frick me, I was falling for Tanner hard and fast.
With Tanner on my mind and the memory of his hands on my arm when he’d stopped me from falling on my ass, I eventually drifted into sleep, not sure whether my dreaming of him was the healthiest thing for me to do.
My alarm blared at stupid o’clock. Grumbling, I shut it off and prepared for work. Just thirty minutes later, I was heading out to the clinic, hoping that Denver, the director of Holmes Veterinary Clinic, wouldn’t spend too long droning on. He was a nice enough boss but had a habit of not knowing when to shut up and let us get on with it. The guy’s heart was in the right place, so it was hard to be too frustrated at him. It didn’t make the journey into work just as the sun was rising any easier though.
After parking, I made my way inside. Lauren greeted me with a grin and a takeout coffee. “For me?” I threw her a thankful grin. “You know I’m yours and will worship you forever, right?”
Lauren laughed and rolled her eyes. “Yes, I have a tab going, and one day I will call it in.” She handed me the cup.
I kissed her on the cheek. “Thank you so much, Lauren.” I inhaled the fresh scent and then brought it to my lips. The magical coffee hit my tongue, and my brain gave a little cheer, promising to start functioning soon. “You are an angel. Seriously.” She really was.
I’d liked Lauren instantly. Not only was she a caffeine addict like me, but she also had divine taste in men. I could happily talk movies and models with her.
“So have you heard the latest?” Her voice took on the tone of conspirator, and she angled her face toward me.
I quirked my brow and grinned. Lowering my own voice, I asked, “I’m assuming not. What gives?”
“Well, Denver’s taking a three-month sabbatical.” She paused to take in my reaction. My eyebrows rising to my hairline was apparently the correct response, as she smirked before continuing. “He’s announcing his temporary replacement today.” How this woman managed to get the intel was beyond me, but she always seemed to be one step ahead.
“Any idea who?” I had no grand dream of being announced. Not only was I new to the clinic, but I was also the youngest by far. I imagined Terry would step up. He was in his fifties and would do a good job at managing the place. I paused at the thought. Something didn’t add up. “Why are you all cloak and dagger about this?” It wasn’t a big deal for Terry or even Holly to take on the position.
Lauren chewed on her bottom lip, barely containing her excitement. If that tell wasn’t a dead giveaway, her gripping my forearm was. “He’s brought someone in from the outside.”
“Oh.” I was genuinely surprised.
“Apparently, he’s Denver’s nephew or cousin’s nephew, or erm, I’m not sure.” A faraway, dreamy look cast over her features. “Just you wait.” She sighed elaborately, her breath causing her bangs to lift and sway.
So the dude was a hottie. Interesting. I always appreciated a bit of sex god in my day. Intrigued, we edged closer to the meeting room door and entered just as Denver cleared his throat to begin. We quickly took our seats, and I glanced around the room. All the familiar faces were present. There was no mystery nephew or whatever relation.
Sitting back, I half listened to Denver talking about a new product coming in, before he droned on about a pharmacy rep visiting the following week. It took everything in me not to drift off completely, but I remained semi-alert. As soon as he mentioned sabbatical, my ears perked up, and I raised my gaze to look at him. It seemed Scott Anderson, his godson, was due to arrive to hold down the fort. Denver reeled off an impressive list of qualifications and positions, so much so it was obvious why Scott would be taking over.
“I know all this seems very sudden, but sometimes when an opportunity presents itself, it can’t be ignored,” Denver said immediately after telling us he’d be leaving in a week. “That’s all the time Scott will need to get a feel for the place,” he praised.
He had high hopes for sure. While we weren’t a huge practice, we were growing, and popular. Plus we had a large catchment of some smaller communities. It was easy to come in as a vet. We could just roll up our sleeves and get the job done, but learning the systems and running of the place I’d assumed took a little more than that. Either I was dead wrong, or this Scott truly was a veterinary god.
I paused at that thought and looked at Lauren. She flicked her gaze to me in question. “How do you know this guy’s a hottie?” I asked in a hushed voice.
She grinned with mischief. “I grabbed his name off Denver’s desk and stalked him on Facebook,” she whispered.
I gave a low snort. This woman was a serious menace but very handy to have around. I watched as she pulled her phone from her pocket. She placed it low under the table and clicked away before nudging me. I surreptitiously leaned closer to her, eyes focusing on the image.
A smiling man stared back from the picture with a chiseled jaw and gorgeous gray eyes. I understood Lauren’s reaction. He was handsome all right, in a clean-cut sleek sort of way. Traditionally handsome, Scott had it covered. He was no Tanner though. The comparison made me pause. Tanner was a little unkempt, with a hot bod, and a smile that made my heart flip ridiculously. Scott definitely didn’t get that reaction. There was also something missing in the eyes of the man in the photo. While pretty to look at, the smile on his lips didn’t meet them. It was curious, really. A man who looked like that, with a resume like his, goodness, what did he have to be unhappy about?
Lauren switched off her phone, wrapping her hands around the device. Making eye contact with her, I barely held back my chuckle as she waggled her brows up and down like a crazy woman. “Right?” she asked.
I gave a noncommittal shrug, a small smile playing on my lips. “Done better.”
Her loud snort drew the attention of the room.
“You okay there, Lauren?” Denver asked.
Nodding quickly, she dragged her lips between her teeth, reining in her need to break into laughter. I did the same.
It was almost two o’clock when Denver stepped into my examining room. I’d had pretty much back-to-back clients all day. Everything routine, which was nice after the hellish case I’d had the previous week involving a rabbit and a key. I looked up when he entered, his godson in tow.
“Carter, Scott Anderson,” Denver introduced. The same smile from his photo was fixed in place. Before Denver could continue with introductions, his name was called from along the corridor. “Excuse me a minute. You two carry on.” Denver smiled before leaving us alone.
“Good to meet you,” I greeted. I smiled and stepped forward, stretching out my hand. Scott took it, giving a firm shake before taking a small step back. “Your journey okay?”
He nodded, glancing around the room before his gaze almost reluctantly settled on mine. “Yes, thank you. It was a trek, but I’m here now.”
“That you are,” I answered, feeling the need to fill in the pregnant pause. I hated awkwardness and silence. I handled neither well, always ending up blabbering on about irrelevant nonsense when the situation arose. “So, where are you staying?”
His jaw twitched before he answered a little too casually, “Oh, I’ll be taking over Denver’s place. He’s heading off on his travels and such.”
Again with the awkward silence. “Oh great. That’s just a few doors down from my place. We’ll be neighbors.” From the blanch on his face, it was clear I was being too peppy. I attempted to tone it down. “So if you need anything, just holler.”
He gave a brief nod before glancing at the door.
“I’m sure Denver’s waiting to introduce you to everyone.” I offered him an escape, which he took with barely a goodbye. The door closing behind him, I stood there a little dumbstruck. What the hell was that all about? The guy was bizarrely on edge and pretty much weird
. Shrugging it off, I finished clearing up my equipment and tidying the room, ready to head home. My workday had officially ended on a weird note, and I couldn’t wait to get home to see Tanner.
I sighed at the thought—home and Tanner—not liking how I was counting the one as being synonymous with the other. After last night’s frustrating conversation, it was clear that Tanner wasn’t interested. While I wasn’t fine with that—okay, I was so disappointed my heart hurt—it was probably for the best. As much as I wanted him, I’d hate for something to go wrong that could screw up his working on the house, but more importantly, I’d hate to miss out on his company.
Our dinners, our conversations, my annoying him while trying to be helpful—I looked forward to those times. They’d filled up so many lonely hours. He made my day brighter and made my heart that much lighter. It wasn’t something I was willing to give up. Attraction be damned.
I waved goodbye to the staff, making sure I found Lauren before leaving. She was busy, so I didn’t have time to chat with her about Scott Analson. Admittedly, I wasn’t great with nicknames, but I amused myself and smiled at the thought. Telling her we’d catch up the next day, I made my way to my car and headed home.
The journey was quick and uneventful, exactly how I liked my journeys. I wasn’t quite sure how I’d cope in the city if I ever decided to return. The quietness of the town was a mix of a blessing and a curse. I loved how laid-back it was, the slower pace, but I hadn’t realized how isolating the quiet could be. I’d been out a few times with Lauren since relocating, but she regularly had hookups, so I’d put off going out for the evening. No one liked being the man sitting by himself in a bar, especially not the gay man in the bar.
I’d had a few mishaps in the town, unsurprising considering the nature of the small-town mentality, but disappointing nonetheless. Fortunately, there were also good people around, especially helpful that several were hardass farmers who I’d gained the respect of since working with them and their cattle. But still, drunk bigots whispering “faggot” none too quietly had a way of ruining and cutting short a night.
I pulled up at my house, smiling at Tanner’s truck parked in the driveway. A wave of calm flowed over me knowing he was already at my house and hard at work. It would be easy to be swept away by that feeling if I allowed it to control me, but I couldn’t. I could do friendship with Tanner, even if it made me miserable. I snorted at the thought. Because however miserable my heart was, it was battling it out with the happiness camping there.
Chapter Seven
TANNER
Hey, honey, you’re home! The temptation was on the tip of my tongue when I heard the front door open and then close, but I held it back. It had been a month since our “gay” conversation, and the tension had only recently dissipated completely. Finally, our easygoing exchanges were back on form, and we’d reached the place where banter was comfortable and friendly flirting was natural if not a little dangerous.
I’d tried not to flirt with Carter, but that was as difficult as not breathing and inhaling his scent when he brushed past me. I liked spending time with him, and winding down over dinner was the highlight of my day. The last few nights I’d hung around after dinner too. One night we’d made a halfhearted attempt at watching a movie. Just thirty minutes in and we were chatting about everything from childhood memories to whether humans would one day live on Mars. It had been midnight before I’d left. Crazy since I’d returned six hours later to start work, but that was just how it was.
There was no doubt that I spent most of my time at his house. While I worked a lot of hours, more than I probably would have on another job, I also spent most of my free time with Carter too. The little voice inside my head would chant “Danger” to me every now and then, but every time I brushed it aside. I was in control. Or at least that was what I told said voice.
Initially I’d felt guilty as hell about Davis and Libby. I’d gone from spending virtually all my free time with the two of them to dropping by every other day, sometimes just three times a week. I still spoke to or texted Davis every day, but the guilt rode me hard.
About three weeks or so earlier Davis had sat me down with a beer and a stern expression. I’d been freaked out initially as it was clear something serious had been on his mind. Apparently the serious talk was an intervention of sorts. At first, I’d laughed it off and lovingly told him to fuck off—until I’d realized how serious he was.
“Tanner, fuck, man. I love you like a brother, and I’ll never be able to repay you for everything you’ve done for Libby and me. Damn, you saved us both.”
I scoffed. He was being ridiculously OTT.
Davis shook his head. “Don’t, I’m serious. When you stepped in, and hell… moved your whole life to support me—” He swallowed hard, emotion swirling in his eyes. I shifted uncomfortably. He was my brother in every way but blood, but fuck, I hated getting emotional. “—you showed me I could do this. I couldn’t manage, be a dad. I was a fucking mess and had no one.”
I made to interrupt, but he shook his head.
“I know I had you, but damn, the thought of asking you for help… yet you were there for me, still are. I love you, man. Seriously. But fuck, I need you to go and get a fucking life.”
His grin contrasted with the seriousness of his words. Laughter burst from my chest, leaving me coughing with how quickly it had ripped from me.
“Seriously? You’re telling me to fuck off and get out of your hair?”
He nodded, his grin wide, eyes serious, and not a shadow of uncertainty or jest evident. “Yeah. Don’t get me wrong, I still want you to be here. Fuck, just the thought of Libby growing up and having to handle all the jerks who’ll be after her by myself is making me get gray fucking hairs already. I’ll need you for that.
“It’s just… it seems like life’s settling down for you. Work’s going well, then there’s Carter.” He waggled his brows, and I shook my head.
“What’s Carter have to do with anything?” Davis hadn’t even met him, but then why would he have? Carter’s a client, I reminded myself.
Davis rolled his eyes so dramatically I thought he’d give himself an injury. “I can’t believe you’re still fooling yourself. I’ve never seen you this hung up on a guy and you haven’t even kissed the dude.” He paused. “Hold on, have you had some and not told me, you dirty fucker?”
“No.” I laughed, shaking my head. “Nothing’s happened.”
“But you want it to happen.” His response was 100 percent statement and 110 percent accurate.
I sighed. “Heck-yeah. He’s so fucking hot, and sexy, and he’s so goddamn smart and sweet and witty.” I stopped when Davis’s expression turned almost comical. His eyebrows popped up so high they virtually touched his hairline. It was teamed with a goofy grin. “What?” I sighed.
“I’m picturing little love hearts forming in your eyes. It’s… strangely cute and… totally fucking weird.” His laughter then died down. “Just get over whatever shit’s holding you back and preventing you from seeing where this thing with Carter may lead, and don’t worry about Libby and me. She knows her uncle Tanner loves her and will break bones for her, but get a life.” It was my turn for my eyebrows to shoot up. “I’m serious. I need you to have a life, find your own happiness.”
I closed my eyes, not quite sure how to process everything he’d said to me. I knew, deep in my gut, every word he spoke was true; it didn’t stop me worrying about him though.
“Hey,” I called down, letting Carter know the general direction I was in.
A murmured “Hey” was almost indiscernible. I paused. Something was wrong for sure. Every single day without fail, Carter would stride my way, a sexy-as-fuck smile on his face, greeting me like I’d just solved world peace or something. Each and every time, I’d always have to calm my breathing and prevent the hitch escaping when I drank him in after not seeing him for the day. It was bad. Fuck, I had it bad.
I placed down my saw and propped the plank agains
t the wall. The pull to check on him was strong. There was no way to ignore it. I found him in the kitchen, a glass of wine in his hand and him topping it up. While leaning against the doorframe, I watched him gulp down the whole glass before he placed both the bottle and the glass on the worktop. He placed his hands flat down on the surface and lowered his head.
I’d never seen him like this. Ever. While I’d not known Carter all that long, after the hours we’d spent together, I was sure I knew him better than most of my friends, with the exception of Davis, and more than any boyfriend I’d had. I didn’t spare a thought to that, not quite sure what that said about me and my past relationships. But Carter, I knew him.
“Hey,” I greeted again, my voice low in an attempt to soothe and not startle. “You want to talk about it?”
He shook his head, not turning to look at me.
He was hurting, that much was obvious. There was only one other way I could think of to deal with it, short of offering him a blow job, which I’d foolishly promised myself I wouldn’t do. “Want something harder?” I clamped my mouth shut. I wasn’t quite sure if it was only me who would possibly misconstrue those words, considering my ailment—as surely that was what it was—of always thinking with my dick when Carter was around. Keeping my mouth shut, I waited for some sort of response from him. His silence was unsettling; even more so was that he didn’t snort at my words.
“I mean, you know, a shot of the hard stuff.” I grimaced, pleased he couldn’t see my heating face. Every time I said the word hard, I immediately thought of our cocks. “A whiskey or something? Bar?” I released a long breath as quietly as possible, waiting for him to answer.
Let Me Show You Page 5