Dragonfly

by Leigh Talbert Moore

  “Rachel doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” Jack looked off.

  “What did happen?” I asked softly. “I mean, it’s personal. And maybe you don’t know me well enough yet…”

  He smiled that gorgeous smile and leaned forward to brush his lips over mine. His breath whispered across my cheek, and my heart skipped a beat. It was so nice when he did that.

  “It’s really Lucy’s business,” he said. “So I hope you can keep this to yourself.”

  “Of course! I mean, who would I tell?”

  “Rachel?”

  “Oh, god no. Rachel’s a big mouth. I didn’t even tell her about us. I mean, it was obvious when you started driving me to school and all, but she would’ve been the last person—”

  “You would’ve talked to if you’d had someone to talk to about me?”

  “Right.” I smiled and slid my fingers under his bangs, smoothing them out of his eyes like I’d always wanted to do.

  His voice turned serious as he told me the story. “Well, I told you Lucy likes to find a hero.”

  “Right. Although, I think you’re her real hero.”

  “She got involved with an older man who took advantage of his position, and she ended up pregnant. He blamed her for the whole thing, said she’d entrapped him, and insisted she have an abortion.”

  My brow creased. “Oh, god. Poor Lucy.”

  “Dad pulled her out of school and sent her to Sedona, to Gigi, and found an adoptive family for the baby.”

  “But why did you go?”

  “I got expelled.”

  “What?” He said it so casually, I thought I’d misunderstood. “Why?”

  “I met the guy in the parking lot one afternoon and beat the shit out of him. Brad and a few of his football buddies helped me. Somebody called the cops, but they took a long time getting there. Played out nicely.”

  My mouth dropped open for a moment. Then I closed it. This was new, and I wasn’t sure how to interpret it. “Were you… arrested?”

  His lips tightened. “Dad’s lawyer handled it. The bastard decided letting me off was better than getting charged with statutory rape.”

  I didn’t answer immediately; more questions were answered. “I guess your dad was pretty angry.”

  “I think he was more pissed I might lose my chance at Yale.” Jack looked off again and the tension was back. “I asked to go to Sedona. Lucy was a wreck, and I figured some time with Gigi would be nice. She pretty much raised us.”

  “So Lucy never considered… the alternative?”

  “What? Abortion? We’re Catholic, Anna. And, well, I don’t think she could’ve gone through with that.”

  “Oh, right. Of course not. I didn’t mean she should’ve or anything. It’s just she was so young, and you guys have so much money…” I wasn’t sure how to finish that sentence, so I switched gears. “You’re really sweet to her.”

  He seemed to relax. “She gets ignored a lot. She frustrates Dad, and William thinks she’s clueless. But she just wants attention from somebody. It’s been hard for her not having a mom around.”

  “Do you remember your mom?”

  “Not really,” he smiled. “I mean, we were three when she died. I remember her soft hair and smile, feeling good when I was with her. But that’s about it.”

  His words made my chest hurt. “That’s really sad.”

  “Yeah, well, it was a long time ago. We never talk about it.”

  That statement seemed odd, and I wondered how much of what Tamara said was true. But I decided not to pursue it. He’d told me so much already.

  “Will you be at school tomorrow?” I asked.

  “No. We’re supposed to meet with the administrators to talk over scheduling. And Dad wants to make the case that my time in Sedona taught me anger management.”

  “You warned me your life was complicated,” I sighed. “I guess I didn’t believe you.”

  He looked down. “I’ll understand if this is more than you bargained for. We can be friends or—”

  “No! That’s not what I want at all!” I threw my arms around his shoulders and hugged him close. “I really wanted to come here tonight. I was worried about you, and… I don’t want you to leave.”

  My voice cracked, and tears filled my eyes. I knew the day he left this dream I was having would end, and I could hardly bear the thought.

  He exhaled, and I pressed my forehead against his warm neck. Before long his hands moved to my sides, lightly massaging, and I lifted my face searching for his kiss. Our lips met, and when his tongue found mine, that delicious warmth filled my body. He moved me to lying back on the sand and leaned down, kissing me deeper. I slid my hands to his cheeks, trying to hold on as his mouth moved mine open again. My breath quickened, and his kisses traveled to my face and then to my neck.

  His hand slipped under my shirt, tracing a burning trail up my stomach. My heart was skipping, but I wasn’t stopping him. All I could think was this might be my last chance, our last time together.

  My eyes fluttered open. The sun had almost completely set, and everything was bathed in a deep, orange glow. Jack moved away and in one swift pull, his shirt was over his head and off. My hands spread across his chest, golden and beautiful, with just a few fine hairs scattered across the top. He leaned in again to find my mouth, and I slid my hands down, exploring his warm torso. He groaned and pulled me up, straddling his lap. I could feel where this was headed as he fumbled with the hem of my loose cotton skirt, making his way beneath it to my panties.

  Heat was surging through me, and I wanted to follow him. I did. My hands moved to his wrists, hesitantly holding them as his fingers found what they were seeking. But when he touched me, I made a little noise and slid off his lap.

  “Hang on,” I gasped, releasing him and then holding my cheeks as my heart tried to settle. “This is just so… well… It’s awfully public.”

  Jack lay back on the sand and pressed his palms against his eyes. I could see he was breathing fast, and for a moment, we didn’t speak. I looked down. The tiny ripples of water continued to break on the shore, and I didn’t know what to say. Guilt pressed down on my shoulders. I couldn’t keep pushing him away like this, but inside I was conflicted. I didn’t want to stop, but I wasn’t prepared. All the things he’d just told me were in my mind along with my dad’s cautionary words, and the last thing I wanted was to mess up my plans or prove his stupid dad and brother right.

  Finally he exhaled and sat up. “I’m sorry.”

  I tried to laugh, but it sounded weak. “No, I’m sorry.” I stood and dusted the sand off my butt. “I need to get ahead of us.” My legs were wobbly, and I wouldn’t dare look into his eyes.

  “It’s my fault.” He stood and pulled the tee back over his head.

  I reached forward and laced our fingers, pulling him toward the house. “It’s late, and my parents don’t know I’m here. I’d better go.”

  We walked back in silence, me trying to find the right words to say, to explain how I was feeling. But nothing was coming. “Your family is pretty screwed up. But you seem okay.”

  He laughed. “Appearances can be deceiving.”

  We stopped at my car, and I looked up at him. “They’re not so deceiving. In all of it, you’ve just been looking out for your family. That’s good.”

  “Maybe,” he looked down. “Look, I knew all the way back at the beginning it was too much—”

  “Stop!” That hint of desperation was back. “I meant it when I said it doesn’t matter to me. I mean, it does, but I don’t care about that. I mean… I just… I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t prepared.”

  He nodded, but I wasn’t sure he understood. “It’s okay,” he said. “We’ll talk soon.”

  A brief hug and he stepped back toward the house. I drove home feeling better and worse than when I’d arrived. I knew so much about him now, and it was wonderful. And terrible. I tried to imagine him being expelled for beating someone, needing anger management. Maybe Dad
was right, and I was wrong. Maybe Jack was dangerous.

  Things had gotten so complicated so fast. Still, I could never say he didn’t warn me. I sighed. Jack was just so totally hot and sexy and exciting. I was determined to ride this one out. Everything in me felt like I didn’t have a choice. I wanted to be with him and be a part of his life so much. It made me feel exciting, and a little glamorous, too.

  Crossing the narrow strip of land that separated his world from mine, the waves seemed agitated as they crashed on the shore. The moon was hidden behind a large mass of clouds, and I could see lightening flicker purple in them every so often. The orange streetlights shone in rippling circles on the black water, and I wondered what I’d be doing right now if Gabi were still here and I hadn’t gone to the beach that day.

  I couldn’t even imagine.

  Chapter 9

  The next week drove me crazy between Jack’s continued silence and my obsessing over what it might mean. I decided to take Julian up on his offer to visit his studio. I’d never made it over while working on the story, and he was always a good distraction.

  It was like a sauna in the small garage, and Julian’s shirt was off. The hot wax method of jewelry-making was very delicate and involved setting tiny shells in wax molds and then filling the molds with sterling silver. Once he had made a series of tiny silver shells, he started the task of soldering them together into a ring.

  It was fascinating work, but as I watched him, studying the lines on his torso, I was distracted by how much he reminded me of Jack on the sailboat that day. It wasn’t just their similar build, but his movements and his focus. It was peculiar. If I just looked at Julian’s body, I’d swear it was Jack.

  Or more likely, I was going crazy with missing my… whatever Jack was. I glanced up and caught Julian’s eyes on me.

  “Were you just checkin me out?” He stood up straight, eyes slanted.

  “No!” I answered too fast.

  Julian grinned, pointing his torch at me. “You were checkin me out.”

  I felt my cheeks turning pink. “I was not. I was thinking about Jack.”

  He frowned and bent down again to continue working. “Where is the golden boy anyway?”

  “His brother’s in town, so he’s been at home. Didn’t Lucy say anything about it?”

  “Nah. She doesn’t talk about them.”

  “What do you guys talk about?”

  “Art. What I do… I guess me mostly.”

  She knows what boys like. “You really like her?” I asked.

  Julian shrugged. “She’s cool, I guess.”

  He stopped and pushed his goggles back to examine the ring. I was sitting on a nearby bench holding a welder’s lens in front of my eyes to protect them from the white-hot light.

  “Have you taken it up a notch?” I asked, wondering why I even cared.

  He glanced at me. “No. We’re taking it slow.”

  “Well, I love the ring. She’s going to be thrilled when she sees it. Of course, if she’s not, I’ll be happy to take it off your hands.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “So what’s the status on art school? Have you applied or what?”

  He pulled off the goggles and grabbed a shirt, pulling it on as he spoke. “I’m building my portfolio now. I’ll probably make another piece like this to put in it, and then I have to go for an interview. Mom and I are going to drive over and tour the campus during spring break, and one of the galleries has offered to write me a recommendation and show some of my smaller pieces in their collection. And I’ve got your story now. Thank you.”

  “Wow. I’m impressed. You’re really on top of things.”

  “Didn’t think I had it in me?” He grinned.

  “Of course not. It’s just, you’re always joking around and stuff. But not with this. You’re so serious.”

  “What other choice do I have?”

  I nodded and he picked up a cloth and started polishing the ring.

  “What do you think about Lucy’s dad?” I asked, watching him. “Have you met him? Or her brother William?”

  “No, I pretty much stay away from those guys. I doubt they’d think too much of me with Lucy.” He held the ring up to look at it again. “You’re going to the party, right?”

  “Honestly?” I studied my Chucks. “I haven’t been invited.”

  “What?” Julian frowned.

  “Jack hasn’t mentioned it, and I’m not sure if it’s because he doesn’t want me there or they don’t want me there or if he thinks Lucy invited me…”

  Julian turned and sat beside me. “You could ask him.”

  “Well, that’s weird. I mean, what? Invite myself to his party?”

  “I could ask Lucy about it.”

  “Would you?” I jumped around to face him. “Oh, Julian, that would be perfect. But don’t make it sound like I put you up to it, okay? Just say something like you didn’t think I’d gotten an invitation or something.”

  “I gotcha covered,” he chuckled. “I never forget a favor.”

  * * *

  Back home, I jogged up the stairs to my room. I took a deep breath and fell back on my bed forcing my fingers into my hair as my heart tried to settle down. I exhaled loudly but still felt like I was having trouble breathing. Alone again, I was so anxious. I didn’t want to think about anything except Jack and why he wasn’t calling and what I could do about it. What if he’d decided I was too inexperienced? What if he just didn’t need any more trouble?

  I was losing it, and I needed to hear a friendly voice. I flipped over to my stomach and grabbed my phone and the notebook where I’d scribbled her new number. I’d never even saved it. I tapped it out quickly and listened to the ring tone.

  “Anna?”

  Hearing my best friend’s voice, I had to struggle not to burst into tears. “Gabi? Oh, Gabi!”

  “You finally called,” she laughed. “You weirdo. What have you been doing? How are you?”

  “Terrible!” I choked out a laugh. “Come back now!”

  “You know I can’t do that. What’s going on? What’s so terrible?”

  Her voice completely distracted me from my pain. “No, you first. How’s Key West? Do you like it? Have you met any celebrities?”

  “Um… no,” she laughed again. “But Key West is gorgeous. It really is beautiful. And there are chickens everywhere! And cats with thumbs.”

  “What?” I felt giddy, and I laughed, too.

  “And everyone here has five jobs. I swear the guy who helped us at the airport was the same guy bagging our groceries at Fausto’s. It’s like one of those old television shows where the same person keeps popping up in a different outfit.” I laughed and she kept going. “Now what’s so terrible?”

  “You’re going to hassle me, but I met this guy. And oh, Gabi, he’s so hot.”

  “Oh my god! You’re in lu-uv.”

  I giggled again. “Well, I’m definitely in pain now, so maybe I am in love. I don’t know.”

  “Who is he?”

  “Jack Kyser? His sister is Lucy, and she’s just beautiful, too—”

  “Kyser? Like the people who own East End Beach?”

  “Oh my god,” I cried. “You are so my mom. They don’t own East End Beach. Their dad just did a lot of the development down there.”

  “No hassle here—I’m impressed! So you’re going out with him? What’s that like. Those guys are super rich.”

  “Well, I sort of was. But then it didn’t work out. His dad came up and was really mean to me, and I left and then Julian asked me to the Back to School dance. So I actually went with Julian.”

  “Wait, you went to a dance with Julian? My Julian?” she shrieked. “I can’t believe it. Traitor!”

  “He was never your Julian,” I defended myself. “And it was just as friends. But while we were there, I started talking to Jack again, and he ended up bringing me home.”

  “And then the make-out began?”

  “Oh, god, yes. His shirt
was off, and his hands were… everywhere. It was so hot.”

  Gabi squealed. “Was it on the beach?”

  “Yes.”

  She squealed again. “Okay, so what’s the problem?”

  “He’s just pulled away. His older brother came into town, and now they’re talking about him starting college in the spring, and I’m afraid it’s just… over.” My stomach ached saying the words.

  “Did you call him?”

  “Yes! I even went over there to see if he was okay, and oh, god. Did I say his dad was mean? His brother is even meaner.”

  “What’s wrong with these people?” I loved my defensive friend.

  “I don’t know.”

  A moment of silence, and then Gabi switched into problem-solving mode. “Okay, press pause and let’s think about this. You’ve snogged. He’s got Satan at his house. Give the boy a break. He’ll call you. You know how guys are. They like totally go all inward when life gets hard.”

  “I guess so,” I said. “It would be so great if you were still here. Then we could do something, and I wouldn’t have to just sit here and think about it all the time.”

  “I know.”

  We were quiet again, and I imagined my friend beside me twirling a curl or flipping through a magazine. “Miss you,” I said.

  “Miss you, too, Banana-face.”

  “That’s another thing. Dad stopped calling me that when he’s around.”

  “Well, that’s not being true to you,” Gabi laughed.

  “It is. I have never liked that nickname.”

  She snorted some more. “Hang in there. And don’t wait so long to call next time.”

  “Okay.”

  I felt degrees better after talking to Gabi. I was lying back on my bed thinking about her advice when the phone rang again in my hand. My heart flew into my throat. Maybe it was Jack. I held it up. Julian. Must be about the party.

  “Hey, Julian, what’s up?” I said.

  I could barely hear his voice, and I sat up fast. Something was wrong. He was shouting over background noise. “Julian?” I said again.

  “There’s been an accident—it’s Lucy. She took something, and… I don’t know what, but she’s unconscious. I need you to go to the hospital in Fairview. And bring Jack.”