Corridor Man: Auditor

by Nick James

  Bobby settled into the living room couch and began listening to the rants on her phone. He quickly understood why she hadn’t listened to all the messages. “Answer your fucking phone, bitch.” the second message began. A couple of times the voice referred to wanting “our” money back, suggesting a couple. No names were ever given. Based on the times the messages were received they had been sent about every three hours. Maybe it was someone who worked nights, a bar or restaurant employee, or maybe someone working third shift. He finished listening to the messages and never arrived at any earth shattering conclusion. A few minutes later he heard a door open, Mira quietly spoke to someone, but he couldn’t make out what was said. A moment later she stepped into the living room.

  “Here’s the list, eighteen names actually by the time they received their refund. How’d it go? Did you actually listen to that nut case?”

  “Well, he’s not what I’d call happy, that’s for sure.” He glanced at the list she handed him. There were a number of names he didn’t recognize. Names from whom he’d never deposited a check. “He did refer to ‘our’ money a couple of times which suggests the calls are from one of the couples. Anything ring a bell when you went over this list?”

  “No, not really. Tell you the truth, there are a couple of names on there I can’t even remember what the people looked like. I only try to meet with them once, get the check and not deal with them again, at least personally.”

  “You have today’s deposit?” Bobby asked.

  “Oh, God, completely forgot. Let me get it for you.” She was back a minute later with an envelope. “Good thing you said something, this has me so upset I completely forgot.”

  He took the envelope from her hand, noticed it felt thicker. A lot thicker than it had for weeks. “If it’s all right with you, maybe back off on appointments for the next day or two. I’d like to hang onto your phone. This guy calls back let me see if we can’t put an end to the harassment.”

  “Oh, that would be great. Thanks, I really appreciate it.”

  “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Mira. Don’t worry about this,” he said then unlocked the door and stepped into the hall.

  “Can’t thank you enough,” she said then closed the door behind him and locked it. He heard what sounded like ice cubes bouncing into a glass and then a moment later an animated conversation. He waited in the hallway hoping he might be able to make out what was being said, but other than voice tones he remained in the dark. After a few minutes he left.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Everything okay? I was just about ready to head in there and check on you.” Miguel said.

  Bobby hefted the envelope in his hand, definitely larger than any in the past three or four weeks. Coincidence? Maybe, maybe not. “It was interesting,” he went on to explain the harassing phone calls. “Then she hands me today’s deposit, twelve checks. Larger than any deposit in the past three or four weeks. My guess is she was so upset she forgot to steal her portion. I’d be willing to bet this is closer to the daily amount we should have been getting.”

  “And that’s what I’ve seen that Hooley prick deposit the past couple of days.”

  “That’s a pretty fair guess. Let’s go make this deposit. I’ve got her phone, we’ll see if this guy calls again.”

  Miguel pulled away from the curb. “What if he does call?”

  “If he calls I guess I’d like to talk with him.”

  * * *

  It was after eight before Mira’s phone rang. Bobby was sipping a glass of wine in front of the TV, more engrossed in a book than what was playing on the screen. The phone lay next to him on the couch so he could answer it before it dropped into voice mail, as he reached for it he noticed the display, ‘no caller id’. “Hello.”

  “Listen here, bitch,” a voice screamed and then suddenly grew silent.

  “Oh hi. So glad you finally called back. I’ve been waiting.”

  “Who the hell is this?”

  “I was about to ask you the same thing. I guess I’m the person you need to talk to in order to get paid.”

  “I just want our fucking money back.”

  “I understand that. Who am I speaking to?”

  “What do you need to know that for?”

  “Well, if I’m going to return your money to you I need to know who you are.”

  He seemed to think about that for a long moment before he finally broke the silence. “It’s Josh,” he finally said.

  “It’s a pleasure, Josh. First, let me start off by apologizing for the treatment you’ve received. I fully understand how upsetting this must be, especially under the particular circumstances you find yourself in. I…”

  “You’re telling me. That bitch kept five hundred bucks and sent a letter to us saying she couldn’t do anything to help. That’s really…”

  “I know. That’s why I’m going to personally get involved. You see Josh, Mortgage Trust has a reputation to uphold and well, let’s just say the woman you were dealing with did not do much to enhance our reputation. Can we agree on that?”

  The voice paused, maybe thinking that last statement over. “She held on to five hundred bucks, and said she couldn’t help. That’s, that just ain’t fair, man. I got the God damned bank on my ass threatening to evict us. I been out of work for over a year, the wife’s hours have been cut. We been getting screwed left and right and then that bitch just shit on us. I couldn’t take it no more. Somethings gotta give. We’re gonna lose the damn house. I gotta tell you, man, someone oughta teach that bitch a lesson.”

  “I know what you mean, Josh. Problem is she’s untouchable. Daughter of a rich guy, he owns a bunch of banks, and he’s been screwing folks left and right. I try to put a stop to it, but I’m just one guy. Neither one of ‘em cares what they do to folks like you and me. You hear what I’m saying?”

  “She wouldn’t even talk to me? Wouldn’t answer my calls.”

  “Yeah, I know. Believe me I know. Hear it all the time from folks. Good folks like you and your wife. Folks just trying to get along, not asking for anything other than to be treated fairly. Once in awhile I’m able to connect with someone, like yourself, try and make the situation right.”

  “I appreciate any help you can give me. I know I signed that there agreement and all, but we got the shit sent back so fast she couldn’t have spent much time checking it out and then she kept five hundred bucks. Christ, I had to borrow the money in the first place. Just a God damned rip off if you ask me.”

  “No question, I couldn’t agree more. See, she and the old man cooked up this deal. It’s just to squeeze a little more blood out of hard working folks like you and your wife. Tell you the truth, I think it’s illegal as hell, but well, you know the rich get to march to a different drum beat than you and me.”

  “It ain’t fair, man. Someone should teach her a lesson.”

  “I hear you. Tell you what, we maybe shouldn’t have this conversation on the phone. I’m wondering if we couldn’t meet somewhere. I’d like to return that five hundred to you. I’ll pay you in cash. I could meet you tomorrow if you can fit me in.”

  “You mean it, you’ll pay me back.”

  “Yeah, I mean it. I’ve been where you are, believe me I know what you’re going through. Is there a number I can call you at? You’re number isn’t displayed on this phone when you call.”

  “Why do you need my number?”

  “So I can meet with you, give you the five hundred dollars.”

  He suddenly sounded cautious. “How about I call you, tomorrow.”

  “That will work, can you call me around noon?”

  “Yeah, I’ll do that,” he said then hung up.

  Chapter Twelve

  The following morning Bobby had Miguel drive him to the hardware store. He had a duplicate keys made to the security door and Mira’s apartment. Both duplicates were shiny silver keys and took all of four minutes and six dollars to make.

  Mira’s phone rang a little before noon.


  “Hello,” Bobby answered.

  “This is Josh.”

  “Yeah, Josh. Thanks for calling. You have time to meet?”

  “You got my money?”

  “Five hundred dollars cash, right?”

  “Yeah,” the voice sounded surprised.

  “I got it. Now here’s what I’d like to do, I…”

  “Hey look. I just want our money back, okay. I don’t want to sign anything. I don’t want to have you look into our case. I just want our money back.”

  “That sounds fine to me,” Bobby said. “Here’s what I want. I’d like to meet you in a public place where both of us will feel safe. I don’t want you thinking I’ve got someone hiding in the bushes and by the same token I don’t want to meet you in some dark bar. Sound fair?”

  “Yeah, I suppose. Where you thinking?”

  “You know where Summit Ave. and Western intersect?”

  “Yeah, I mean I can find it.”

  “Okay, it’s three or four blocks from the Cathedral. There’s a little fountain in the park with a statute of an Indian kid running with a dog. I’ll be sitting by the fountain in the little brick structure with the bench. Can you get there in the next thirty minutes?”

  “Thirty minutes, yeah I can do that. You got my cash?”

  “I got five hundred dollars with your name on it.”

  “See you there,” Josh said and hung up.

  Bobby stared at the fountain and the statute of the Indian boy then looked to the side and waved at Miguel parked on the street. He looked the other way and nodded at Jesús sitting on a park bench. Jesús flicked his index finger in return.

  Fifteen minutes later he could hear the vehicle before he actually saw it. An older model pickup, maybe a Ford Ranger, but he couldn’t be sure. It was black although the tailgate was grey, obviously a replacement. The body appeared rusted above the wheel wells and the passenger door had a deep crease across it. What looked like an old washing machine and a couple of large analog televisions were loaded in the back of the pickup. The vehicle pulled to the curb on the street perpendicular to the park, then shuddered for a moment before completely turning off. The driver’s door gave out a loud groan as it opened and a middle aged guy in jeans and a faded black t-shirt climbed out.

  He looked around, cautiously scanned the area, then fixed his gaze on Bobby and headed toward him. There was a slight limp in his right leg, maybe the hip more than the knee although it was hard to tell. He leaned forward a bit as he walked and as he drew closer he appeared older than Bobby had first thought, maybe mid-to-late forties. His dark brown hair was close cropped on the sides, almost shaved, then longer and slicked back on the top with some wayward strands hanging down almost to his ears. He kept looking around as he walked. He focused on Jesús for a long moment, but never slowed his approach. As he drew closer Bobby noticed the Harley Davidson logo on his t-shirt.

  “Hi, you must be Josh?” Bobby smiled and stood up from the concrete bench he’d been sitting on.

  The man nodded, then gave another cautious look in the direction of Jesús and said, “I don’t believe you ever told me your name.”

  “Oh, sorry. Hooley. Dennis Hooley,” Bobby said and held out his hand.

  Josh ignored the hand and shot another quick glance toward Jesús. “You said you’d have our money, make things right.”

  Bobby nodded, reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope. As he reached in his pocket Josh’s hand quickly rose to his belt and Bobby caught the hint of a pistol grip tucked into the waistband of his jeans. “Just pulling an envelope out, no need to get nervous.”

  “I see your boy over there,” he said nodding toward Jesús. “Don’t get any ideas about trying to pull a fast one on me. I’m just a little smarter than that.”

  “Nothing like that entered my mind,” Bobby said and pulled out the envelope. “Here, count it out, make sure it’s all there.”

  Josh snatched the envelope from his hand then took three steps back. He glanced around before quickly opening the envelope and gave a quick count. He looked up at Bobby and counted again, this time his lips moved. “This here’s double what you owe me, man.”

  “Yeah, I know that. If you check in that envelope again there’s also a sheet of paper with an address.”

  He glanced around cautiously, took another half step back and quickly opened the envelope. “Yeah, this address on Shephard Road, number 612? What the hell is that?”

  “It’s the apartment of the woman who tried to rip you off.”

  “That Celeste bitch?”

  “That the name she’s using now? Her real name is Mira.”

  “She told us it was Celeste.”

  “Makes it that much harder to track her down. She never gave you an address did she?”

  He furrowed his brow for a moment, thinking. “We sent her some paperwork and mortgage shit. The wife took care of that.”

  “Yeah, it went to a PO Box. When you got your refund the check has the PO Box on it for the address. Her phone number, this phone here,” Bobby said pulling the cellphone out of his pocket. “It’s a pay as you go. Virtually untraceable.”

  “She can do that shit? Get away with it?”

  “She has so far. That’s why I wanted to meet you, get you paid, add a little something extra in there for the headache.”

  “I ain’t following.”

  “I was just thinking it’d be nice if someone taught her a lesson.”

  “A lesson? You mean like kick the shit out of her or something. I admit I was pissed off, and the bitch definitely has it coming, but I ain’t that kind of guy.”

  “Okay. So you got your five hundred bucks, plus a little extra. Let’s say you put it all toward your mortgage. You said they’re getting ready to foreclose, right?”

  Josh stared at his feet and sort of nodded, “Yeah, bastards gave us till the end of the month then were out in the street. Fuck.”

  “So you’re going to have to pay up, what fifty, a hundred grand?”

  “I could bring it current with thirty-two grand, but hell, it might as well be thirty-two million. I can’t get it, no one will lend to us.”

  “What if I told you where you can get thirty-two grand?”

  “Huh?”

  “That address in the envelope. There’s a lot more than thirty-two grand there. All in cash. Money she’s ripped off from hard working folks like you and your wife. Folks who just wanted to be treated fair and instead ended up getting ripped off.”

  “So why you telling me this? Why not go to the cops?”

  “I did, they weren’t interested?”

  “Bullshit, come on, they…”

  “They said I couldn’t prove it. Then when I told them how she was working the scam they said there was nothing illegal about the way she was doing it.”

  “What?”

  “I guess once you sign a contract. You did sign a contract didn’t you?”

  “Yeah, paid her twenty-five hundred to get the bank off our ass and she sent everything back three days later with that letter that said she couldn’t help. Made me look like a damn fool.”

  “Yep. That’s exactly what she does to everyone. I’m telling you, she needs to be stopped.”

  “Why don’t you stop her?”

  “I tried, like I said, the cops won’t do anything because…”

  “So why don’t you kick her ass and teach her a lesson?”

  “You kidding she’d probably like that. No, I was thinking if someone got hold of the money she’s got stashed. Got themselves right with those bastards at the bank. It might make a lot of other things right.”

  “I can’t just walk in and take the money. The last thing I need is another run in with the cops.”

  Bobby made note of ‘another run-in’, but didn’t react “That’s the beauty of this. She’s out of town for the next two days.”

  “Out of town?”

  “Up at some lake or something. I mean if you’re interested in getting th
e bank off your back. Well, like I said, it’s cash and it’s there for the taking.”

  “This some kind of secure building?”

  “It is, but I just happen to have a way around that,” Bobby said then pulled the shiny, duplicate keys from his pocket and dangled them out in front of Josh.

  “And she’s got all this cash in there? It don’t make sense, why not keep it…”

  “She’s afraid the IRS might learn about it. That’s why it’s not in the bank. I think she keeps it in a couple of athletic bags in a closet. The things are just stuffed with it, the cash.” He dangled the keys back and forth for a moment.

  “Maybe I’ll think about it,” Josh said then quickly reached over and took the keys from Bobby.

  “Sure, I get that. Just don’t wait too long. Like I said she’s back tomorrow night or the next morning, something like that. Hey, if you’re cool with losing the house and the wife’s okay with that. No sweat, right? I mean even though she ripped you off, it kind of worked out for you, sort of, I guess. It’s a busy place, the building, until after midnight, after that you could just walk in and back out and no one would ever know.”

  “I said I’ll think about it,” Josh said then turned on his heel and hurried back to his truck. He gave a quick glance over his shoulder before he climbed in and quickly drove off.

  Chapter Thirteen

  As soon as Josh disappeared from sight Miguel drove them over to Mira’s apartment. Bobby stood in the hallway for a while, attempting to make out the conversation he heard coming from the far side of the door. His frustration eventually reached the level where he knocked on the door. The conversational tones immediately stopped and there was a long moment before Mira unlocked the door and then stood there. “Hi Bobby, you here for the deposit?”

  “Just like every other day,” he smiled back. “Brought you a little something, I feel bad you had to deal with those harassing phone calls the other night.” He handed her a brown paper bag. The bottles inside clinked together as she took the bag from him.