Bittersweet Deceit

by Blakely Bennett

  Me: You better not have!!!

  Stayman: Not to worry, OCDC. I did however tell him that I stayed over at your place and wasn’t paying attention to my phone.

  Me: Good grief!

  Stayman: I thought I wouldn’t be hearing from you for a good thirty-six hours. That didn’t take you long.

  Me: Gloating again? I was just passing along a message!

  Stayman: I miss you too.

  Me: I’ve got to go.

  Me: Wait

  Stayman: What now, OC?

  Me: Thank you so much for the soup. It’s delicious. I think I’ll be living on it for the next few days.

  Stayman: My pleasure.

  Me: Goodbye, Stayman.

  Stayman: Goodbye, sweetheart. If you’re pussy starts aching for me like my cock aches for you all the time, you know where to find me.

  Me: You’re incorrigible. Now leave me alone!

  Stayman: Yes ma’am.

  I shook my head and that time I was very aware of it. The last text from Blue said:

  Blue: Sorry we ditched you for so long. See you Wednesday?

  I texted her back:

  Me: No worries. See you Wednesday.

  I decided I would call Jacqs on the way to work and call my father later.

  Once in my Saturn Sky, I hit dial on my speaker phone.

  “Hey, girl,” Jacqs said when she answered.

  “You have a minute?”

  “Yeah, I’m at my desk. I apologize that we got separated for so long yesterday. Next year just you and I can go.”

  I made a left turn and said, “I doubt I will ever go to that art fair again.”

  “Oh, you didn’t enjoy it? Was the music bad?”

  “Jacqs?”

  “Yeah?”

  “I have something to tell you, well a lot but I really don’t have it in me to go into a lot of detail right now. Okay?” I stopped at a red light waiting to make a right turn.

  “You’re scaring me.”

  “I don’t mean to. The Reader’s Digest is that in Delray I saw Mason with his wife and family.”

  I heard her gasp and then she asked, “Shit! Did he see you?”

  “No. To make a very long, godawful story short, I ended it with him yesterday.”

  I heard her blow air out, in relief maybe. “There’s more, I can tell.”

  “Stay. Stay came and got me from the fair and well—”

  “You’re having sex with Stay? Get the fuck out of town. That’s fantastic. How was it?”

  “In some ways it’s off-the-charts incredible but—” I pulled in behind the shop and turned off the car.

  “But?”

  “He has agreed to a friends with benefits arrangement. He is so nice to me, and I’m worried about hurting him. He says that’s for him to worry about.”

  “I agree with him. Hang on a second.” I heard her cover the phone and say something. She continued, “Plus you never know, Lainie, you might just fall in love with him. Are you coming out to the get together on Wednesday?”

  “Do you need to go?”

  “You’re not getting off the phone that easily. Finish!” she demanded.

  “I have to assume it will be fairly obvious that Stay and I are together. Letting people know then is the plan.”

  “Whoop, whoop! I can’t be happier for you! Please, can I tell Aidan?”

  Shaking my head again, I realized Stay was right. I did it a lot. “Yes, you can tell him. Listen, I’m at the shop and need to go inside. I’ll see you Wednesday if we don’t talk before.”

  “Love you, girl. I’m going to barge into Aidan’s office and tell him now.”

  I chuckled and said, “Love you too.”

  I placed my bag down in the office and walked out into the shop.

  “Hey, Lainie, I love your hair like that. Did you put waves in it?” Sam asked, walking over to me.

  “This is my natural hair. I usually blow it straight. I didn’t feel like taking the time today. Same for the casual dress and no makeup.”

  “You look great. I hope you were late because you were getting the good stuff in bed.”

  That I could possibly look good had to be some sort of magic. “My lips are sealed.”

  “Come on! You’re so secretive. I’m trying to live vicarious through you. Jacqs tells me nothing.”

  “Lucky you. Jacqs often wants to tell me too much.”

  Samantha laughed.

  “I’ll tell you one, well two things, but no questions afterwards.”

  She pretended to turn a key over her lips.

  “No more MM, and Stay and I are ... casually dating.”

  “Oh, lucky you. He is one hot man and so into you. Plus, he’s one of the good guys.”

  “He’s ... I don’t know what he is other than extremely persistent.”

  We laughed together and then the air got caught in my throat. I wanted, needed, to be alone.

  “Why don’t you take the rest of the day off? You have been filling in for me so often lately, you deserve it.”

  “Are you sure? I could surprise Sarah and take her to the park for a picnic. Thankfully it’s not hot like it was yesterday.”

  “Go for it. Enjoy.”

  She stepped toward me tentatively and I met her halfway for a hug. “Thank you, Lainie, and not just for the time off,” she said as she stepped back.

  Once she left, I sighed out and breathed a little easier. Samantha was great but I didn’t feel up to engaging in idle chitchat. The store had little traffic after lunch, and I spent my time on mindless tasks. I sorted through the inventory in the back, refolded shelf after shelf in the shop although it really didn’t need it, and I scrubbed out the bathroom even though I have cleaners come in twice a week. With my ear out for the door, I straightened and wiped down my office too.

  Bella Boutique looked great by the time I got ready to leave. After entering the numbers for the night, I headed home.

  Nothing earth shattering happened that night, thankfully. I smoked a couple of cigarettes, ate a bowl of Stay’s chicken soup, and watched The Voice. I didn’t even feel like journaling. For a moment, as I was falling asleep, I wished I could be one of those people who climbed into bed and didn’t get out for days.

  My mother didn’t tolerate such nonsense. To her catching a cold and giving into it was a major weakness. The walking wounded I had down to a science.

  Just before the edge of oblivion overtook me, I thought of Stay and wondered if I’d feel the same about him when I saw him at his place tomorrow.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  Dark Paradise

  by Lana Del Rey

  At work on Tuesday I felt on edge the entire day. I hadn’t contacted Stay and even with all that had happened, part of me was waiting to hear from Mason. Stay said that Mason wouldn’t give up easily and yet it felt like he had. His lack of communication felt like further rejection. Rationally I understood that hearing from Mason would make matters worse but that didn’t keep me from craving any kind of sign that he was still thinking of me.

  I missed him and the idea of us. The Lainie from the days of Mason had perished and I missed her too. In some ways Stay felt like a Band-Aid, a sweet, sexy, considerate, masculine kind of first aid. Almost like candy that was slightly too sweet. I certainly didn’t have the willpower to resist because in his arms I enjoy orgasmic abatement from my anguish.

  When my phone chimed I ran to the back to check it.

  Stayman: You’ve exhausted my patience so please forgive the intrusion. What time will you be here?

  Me: Around eight. I’m not exactly sure how to get there. Should I pick up some food on the way?

  Stayman: Why don’t I pick you up? Got food covered.

  Me: That’s silly. Why pick me up?

  Stayman: Did you pack clothes for tomorrow?

  Me: Yes.

  Stayman: Then I’ll come get you and I can drive you back in the morning.

  Me: Why?

  Stayman: Then you are
my captive and can’t run off in the middle of the night. You’re shaking your head, right?

  Me: I am. You’ve conveniently forgotten that I took a cab from your place last time.

  Stayman: Well then, I’ll just tie you to the bed. And STOP shaking that pretty head of yours.

  Me: Fine. Seven thirty and thanks.

  Stayman: Oh, and OC...

  Me: Yes...

  Stayman: I have plans for you.

  Me: You’ll have to catch me first.

  Stayman: The trap is already set.

  Me: Let me finish up so I’m ready by the time you get here.

  Stayman: I’m on my way.

  Damn the man for being so darn charming and cunning. With him I felt sure I’d experience something new. That potential already had me turned on and hungering for his touch. The perils of emotional involvement had me dreading it in equal measure.

  I turned off the lights in the shop and headed back into the office to grab my bag and purse.

  The bell rang on the back door.

  “Coming,” I yelled. I flipped off the computer screen and then the office light.

  After locking the door behind me, I took in Stay’s appearance. He wore jeans and had on a very nice sateen turquoise dress shirt.

  “You let your hair dry naturally,” he said, fingering the bottoms of my light-brown hair.

  “Don’t let it go to your head.”

  “You’re beautiful, Lainie, and it always goes to my head.”

  I couldn’t help myself; I glanced at the front of his jeans.

  “Come on, OC, it’s already getting late and there’s still lots to do.”

  “To do?”

  “Plus I ran you a steaming hot bath and I don’t want the water to get too cold. Let’s go.” He took my hand and opened the passenger door to the Corvette. “You’re chariot awaits.” He waved me in.

  We rode with the top down, music blasting, my hair flying in every direction, and I was able to relax into the wind. I rarely put the top down on my own car and it was nice to experience it with another.

  “You don’t have to dress up for me, Stay,” I said as he pulled into the garage under his building.

  “Do you like this shirt?”

  “Well, yes,” I said, touching the fabric.

  “Do you like me in this shirt?”

  “Of course. It makes your eye color even more intense.”

  “Just because we’re casual dating, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t make an effort. Just like you leaving your hair wavy for me.” He came around to my side of the car and helped me out. “I can’t wait any longer,” he said, taking me into his arms.

  His kiss bore into me, ferrying me away from my problems and into his energy field. In his arms he at once infused me with strength and weakened my resolve. Breaking away from me, he said, “We need to stop or I’m going to take you on top of my car. Jesus, woman, it’s like you cast this spell over me and my need to take you roughly surfaces with such force that I have to fight against it.”

  “Who asked you to fight it?” I said, stepping back and straightening my shirt.

  “Don’t say shit you don’t mean, OC. I mean it.”

  I stared at him. Neither of us smiled. Truth be told, I wanted him to fuck me and fuck me hard. It was far easier to take than being made love to. His domination allowed me to escape to a safe place, away from the realties I had to face. The sweet stuff just left me feeling guilty as if I were cheating on Mason and deliberately hurting Stay.

  “I mean it,” I said.

  He opened his mouth and then shook his head. “You’re bath awaits.”

  Inside, I heard soft music playing. After removing my shoes, Stay brought me into his bedroom. He unbuttoned my top and stepped behind me to remove my bra. With his hands he caressed the surface of my back and neck. He flipped me around and tickled up my stomach to my breast.

  I had to push away from his intense expression. On my knees, I unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them off.

  “Lainie,” he said, looking down on me.

  “I need to taste you,” I said, tugging on the boxer shorts that were in my way. Once I sucked his cock into my mouth, I risked peering up at him again.

  “I know what you’re doing. Oh Jesus, it’s working. Lainie, come on, let’s bathe together.”

  I rested down on my heels and said, “As sweet as that sounds, can we please fuck first and clean up later. I promised I’ll be more relaxed by then.”

  “Why, Lainie?”

  “You’re asking a question you really don’t want the answer too. Now take me and take me hard.”

  His chest moved up and down rapidly. I could see him struggle between what his body wanted and what he thought was right. He clinched my hair in his hands yanking my head back. I opened my mouth, staring up at him. He forcefully sluiced in and out of my throated a few times and I groaned around him. Still holding onto my hair, he pulled me to my feet and led me over to the couch. “Goddamn it, Lainie, I wanted to introduce you to the tantric chair in a different way.” He roughly bent me over the high end of the chair, my hips over the top, just barely on my tiptoes.

  He plunged into my wetness without mercy and I cried out, “Yesss ... don’t stop.” His cock banged against my cervix and I welcomed the pain. “More, harder,” I yelled.

  My hair in one fist, my shoulder gripped in the other, he thrust rapidly and I could tell he was angry. Wholly turned on, but pissed off too.

  I didn’t care. I lifted my feet off the ground, the chair holding my weight and spread my knees wider apart.

  He grunted when he finally hit all the way home.

  My orgasm threatened as he split me wide with his girth and speared me with his length. “Don’t stop. Stay, don’t stop. Oh please ... I’m ... going to come!”

  He pounded through my release and then pushed off of me. His hand rubbed across his short hair as he paced away from me and then back. His engorged cock stood at attention, not lessening in the least. “Goddamn it!”

  “Would you please relax?” I said, reaching out to touch his leg as he paced by again. I stood up and faced him.

  “I feel like...” he started.

  “Like?”

  “I could hurt you with my intense need,” he confessed.

  “If you mean your pulsing cock, I can handle it. If you mean your emotions, then I’m at a loss.”

  “My way this time,” he said, sitting on the couch, his back against the high end, and his legs on the floor on either side. He drew me to him and I straddled his lap. “This position is going to be deeper so let me know if it’s too much.”

  He was right. The angle of the chair slanted my hips in perfect alignment with his cock. As much as I fought the sensuality before, it felt exquisite having his hands softly caressing my ass and back, through my hair and over my shoulders, while the front of me lay atop of his. The chair allowed us to kiss with ease, my hands fondling his head and neck.

  Then he flipped us around so my back was against the chair. In an elevated missionary, with his feet on the ground, the position gave him leverage to grind his hips into me. Resting my head on the top of the chair arch, I swiveled my pelvis into his thrusts. I watched as Stay tugged on my hard nipples. He then folded my legs under his arms as he continued to penetrate my pussy in a slow, sultry rhythm. I held the back of his head, our eye contact absolute.

  “You feel so good, Lane. Thank you for letting me take my time.”

  “This ... time, oh yes ... this time.”

  “I could do this forever ... just like this. Can you feel—you’re so wet.”

  “Don’t stop,” I said, kissing him deeply, circling my arms around his back.

  He laid his hands on the top of the chair on either side of my head and increased his propulsion.

  “Stay.”

  “What, sweetheart?”

  “Ohhh!”

  “I feel it. Look at me.”

  And I did. I cried out staring deeply into his eyes, tears blu
rring my vision.

  He demanded that I open myself to him in a way that scared the hell of me, but oh, it felt so damn good too.

  I convulsed around his shaft again and groaned, feeling so utterly full. “I’ve never felt—”

  “Me either.” With one arm around my waist and another around my back, he helped me to move up and down on him until he came, and came, and came. His face contorted in extreme ecstasy as he grunted out, “Lainie.” When his orgasm subsided, he fell against me, his lips to mine.

  We kissed and caressed until we both settled back to earth.

  “Shall we bathe?” he asked.

  “Sure. I can see why you like this chair.”

  “You haven’t seen much yet. There are several other interesting positions we can try.” He got up and held out his hand to me.

  I let him pull me up and usher me to the bathroom.

  “I’ll let some of the water out and turn on the hot water.”

  “Candles?” he asked. Three large candles sat on the outer ledge of the tub.

  “Sure,” I said. “I rarely take the time for a bath. This is a special treat.” I lit the candles and once the water temperature was right, we got in.

  I leaned against him as he leisurely washed my skin with a washcloth.

  “What was going on when you first got here?” he asked casually.

  “Do we have to talk about that?” I glanced at him over my shoulder and then turned back around.

  “Yes we do. I believe in honesty and transparency and whether we are friends or more, we should be able to talk about anything or ask each other anything. Holding it back just leads to lack of authenticity in a relationship.”

  “You mean like me and Mason.”

  “No, OC, I wasn’t referring to you but speaking generally.”

  “Okay. You asked for it.” I took a deep breath and spit it out, “Sex with you, you demand so much. Too much. When we fuck, and it feels incredible by the way, I can get lost in the fierce sensation without involving my heart. When we...”

  “Make love?”

  “Yes, that. You rip my heart open and strip me bare,” I said.