Out of Frame

by Megan Erickson

  “What the hell,” I muttered, turning to Jess. “Are we in opposite world or . . . ?”

  I forgot where I was going with that sentence, because right in front of me, Casey bent down and began to kiss Jess.

  And by kiss, I meant devour.

  His hands cupped her face, his jaw worked. I wasn’t sure what to do, but standing there right beside them seemed awkward as hell, so I did what I always did—retreat. I blended into the wall, something I had a lot of practice doing, and made my way to the corner, near the door.

  There was a screech, and the partygoers and cameras weren’t watching the bar; they were now watching the trio of Casey, Jess, and Selena. The small Latina cast member screamed at Casey, her words undistinguishable but clearly angry as she stood inches from him, her finger pointed in his face. I couldn’t see Jess’s expression because her back was to me, but Casey was standing protectively between her and Selena.

  I began to inch my way back toward Jess when whatever they were fighting about became insignificant compared to what was going on at the bar.

  Which was also a fight.

  A real, chair-tossing, punch-throwing fight.

  Was there something in the water—er—drinks tonight? Everyone had fucking lost their minds.

  The entire room was a clearing of the benches as everyone rushed to see what was going on at the bar. In the middle of it all was Levi.

  He was yelling and shoving, and damn, but that boy could hold his own.

  I was caught between wading in to help Levi or standing up for Jess when a hand clamped around my arm and yanked me backward through the door.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Jay

  Quinn struggled until I turned him to face me and whispered, “It’s me.”

  He blinked, one arm cocked back to punch whoever had him. I gestured to his fist with my chin. “What do you plan to do with that?”

  He flushed a little and dropped his arm. “Shut up. It’s like a war zone in there. I was prepared to defend myself.”

  I grinned. “Yeah, they’re doing awesome.”

  He tilted his head. “What did you say?”

  “So, everything they’re doing in there is just one giant distraction.” I was damn proud of them, too. Oscar-winning performances.

  “But Jess—”

  “She’s in on it, too. And Selena’s playing her part perfectly.”

  The line between his brows was cute. “I’m so confused. A distraction for what?”

  “For us.” I licked my lips and dipped my head. “So we could do this.” I kissed him, and this time he didn’t put up a fight at all. Immediately he moaned and grabbed the collar of my shirt, tugging me to him. Before he had a chance to deepen the kiss, I pulled back. “Hold on, we can’t do this here. We have a couple minutes before the crew who was supposed to be on me stops rolling on whatever is going on in there.” I pointed at the door, through which we could still hear shouting.

  He nodded. “All right. Your cabin?”

  “Is that okay?”

  “Uh, yeah, I’d love to be naked with you, so if we can do it there, then let’s go.”

  I laughed and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “Perfect.”

  To avoid the live-feed cameras, we took separate routes to get to my cabin. I kept an eye out the entire way for rogue cameras or passengers.

  I felt a little like Clark Kent, like I needed to shed these clothes and get down to my real self. The one who wanted to be with Quinn. The one who was so tired of hiding. The one who wanted to be honest.

  I was in my cabin for a minute when there was a soft knock at the door. I opened it up and tugged a panting Quinn inside. He leaned back against the wall to catch his breath.

  We stood facing each other for a minute, the air between us heated and crackling. I braced my hands on either side of his head. “One last leap with me, Quinn.”

  He brushed the back of his hand along my jaw, then swiped his fingers over my cheekbone. “I’m ready.”

  I kissed him, wishing like hell we had more than this, more than tonight. We’d get off this ship tomorrow and Quinn would return to school and I’d be signing my life away again.

  Quinn pulled my shirt over my head and I did the same to him, then we stepped out of our shorts, mouths crashing together, fingers touching skin.

  I laid him down on the small bed and covered him with my body. Reaching between us, I stroked both of us in my fist.

  Quinn’s eyes were glazed over as he arched into my touch. His lips were parted, his entire body flushed with arousal. I kissed his nose and his jaw, licking his neck and nibbling on his ear. His fingers dug into my shoulders, my back, my ass as the muscles flexed every time I thrust against him.

  I wanted to say so much, to tell him what this meant to me, to tell him what I wanted to do, but our pants and our moans and our groans somehow made words unnecessary.

  Finally, when we were both close, I touched our foreheads together. “Let me get the stuff, okay?”

  His eyes were huge, pupils blown, and he only hesitated a second before nodding. He made a sound of protest as I let go of him to roll off the bed. I rummaged around in Levi’s drawers until I found what I was looking for, then I was back on top of Quinn, a condom and lube beside his head.

  I straddled his hips, my hands near his shoulders. There were so many things I wanted to do with him and not near enough time to do them. He rolled his hips beneath mine, his tongue swiping his lower lip. “What are you waiting for?”

  “I’m not waiting for anything,” I said. “I’m enjoying. I’m appreciating. I’m so fucking happy in this moment that I’m with you.”

  Quinn groaned and smacked my shoulder. “Quit saying sweet stuff like that!”

  “Why?”

  “What do you mean, why? Because you’ll ruin me for everyone else, and then I’ll be a crazy old gay with twelve cats and no sex life.”

  I shook my head. “That was dramatic.” Leaning down, I nudged my nose with his. “Quit thinking of anything else but right now. Right here. With me.”

  His arms wrapped around my neck and his fingers dug into my skull. He pulled my head back so our eyes met, and his expression was earnest. “You’re right. Just this moment.”

  “Freeze-frame it,” I whispered.

  He made a clicking sound with his tongue, like a camera shutter. “Done.”

  As I stared into his eyes, I knew this was a moment I’d remember, one of those ten-second memories that replayed in my head sometimes. Like my first kiss with my first crush, a girl named Dawn. Like playing football with the neighborhood kids and catching the ball one-handed to score a game-winning touchdown.

  When we won state championships in basketball, and my parents cheered and clapped for me in the stands.

  And now this moment, here, where I knew without a doubt that I was falling for Quinn. That I’d always care for him, wonder where he was, how he was, this quiet boy I’d met on a cruise ship who would change the way I looked at myself.

  The guy I trusted enough to ask him to fuck me.

  I opened up the condom and rolled it down over his dick. His body stiffened, and I didn’t look him in the eye as I smoothed it down, then coated him with lube. Finally, my gaze met his. “Will you fuck me?”

  He blinked a couple of times. “Wait, you were serious before?”

  “Yeah, I’m serious. I want to know what it feels like. I want to know if I like it. And I trust you, Quinn. Please?”

  I sat up and with a crack, my head slammed onto the bunk above me. “Fuck!” I hollered, clutching the back of my head as I collapsed down on top of Quinn.

  “Oh my God!” His fingers massaged my head. “Are you okay?”

  I began to laugh. Not just a small huff, but a full-on belly laugh. “Shit, this is ridiculous. Could I get any sexier? You turned on now
that I have head trauma?”

  After a second of silence, Quinn laughed as well, his hands cupping my face as he kissed me. Then he smacked my shoulder. “Get up, I have a better idea.”

  I stumbled out of bed, still rubbing my head and aware that despite the crack in my skull, my dick was still hard as a rock.

  Quinn took the blanket off my bed and laid it on the floor. He stepped on it carefully, wiggling his toes, then looked up at me. “I’ve . . . never topped before.”

  God, we were like awkward teenagers. “Okay.”

  He held a hand out. “But I know . . . I know what feels good when I’m . . . you know . . .” His face reddened, but he licked his lips and soldiered on. “When I’m the bottom. So we can do this.” A smile spread across his face as he took a step toward me and stroked his dick. “It feels so fucking good, Jay.”

  I tried not to show my nerves as I smiled back. “Okay.”

  He told me to lie down, and then he curled up next to me, the lube in his hand. First he coated my dick and stroked a couple times. I let my legs fall open as his hand squeezed me, as his fingers rolled my balls. After another application of lube, he moved his hand back until he began to circle my hole.

  I reached my arm out and grabbed his shoulder as he applied a little pressure. It felt . . . weird. Not painful. Not fully pleasurable either, but I knew I wanted more. I wanted that finger inside.

  He was watching his hand, but his gaze swept up to mine. “You okay?”

  I nodded. “Yeah.” My voice sounded odd, strained, detached, as that finger continued its increasing pleasure.

  “I have to stretch you.”

  “I know.”

  He smiled. “Right.” And when he leaned down to kiss me, his finger slid in all the way. Immediately I clenched, my first instinct against this foreign object invading my body. But Quinn murmured against my lips, and his hard dick rubbed against my hip, and so I focused on him, on us.

  He was able to add two fingers, then three, and by that time, I was sweating, my breathing erratic. I was glad the lights in the cabin were dim because I couldn’t imagine what I looked like, my body sprawled on the floor, legs obscenely spread as Quinn worked his fingers in and out of my body. “Please,” I whispered. “Go ahead.”

  “You sure?”

  “Positive.”

  He nodded, then lay on his back, tugged me to him, and urged me to straddle his hips. He stroked my thighs, his thumbs moving in slow circles. “I think this will be a good position for you. You can see my face and control the speed and depth, okay?”

  I squeezed my eyes shut at the tender look on his face, the gentleness of his voice. For once in my life, I’d made a fucking right decision. Thank God I hadn’t sated my curiosity with some stranger back in LA who wouldn’t have cared to make it good for me.

  I scooted forward, then reached around and lined up the head of his dick at my entrance. He smiled, those hands continued to massage my thighs. “Just sit back, Jay, and take me in.”

  I held back a wince as the blunt head began to breach me. It was wider than his fingers, and it hurt.

  “Breathe,” Quinn said, stroking my softening erection. “Breathe.”

  I did but it still hurt, and I wondered if this was going to work. I moved my hips in a circle, working to take him inside me. There was a slight burn, then something inside me gave way, and I sank down all the way.

  We both froze as I braced my hands on Quinn’s chest. His blue eyes were round, his mouth open. His lips moved a couple of times, like he was trying to talk. Finally, he swallowed and licked his lips. “I . . . can’t describe how good you feel right now.”

  I wiggled my hips experimentally, moaning when his dick brushed against my prostate. Quinn’s hands were gripping the sheet below us in a white-knuckled grip.

  “I’m going to move now,” I said.

  “Are you okay?” he asked.

  “I . . . think so.”

  He nodded. “Okay. Okay.”

  I placed my palms on either side of his shoulders and then slowly began to rock myself up and down on his shaft. He encouraged me to change the angle a couple times until we found the way that had his dick pinging my prostate on every thrust.

  He continued to stroke my dick, and the burn was receding, the pleasure of being full, of Quinn inside me, overtaking any other sensation.

  The tendons in his neck were straining, his teeth gritted, as he stared at me with not a little bit of awe. I wondered if my expression was the same.

  When I came, the orgasm raced down my spine and exploded in my groin. I came with a hoarse curse all over Quinn’s stomach, and I vaguely heard him groan in response as his body stuttered below mine.

  I held the condom in place as I pulled off of him, my thigh muscles screaming at me. I flopped onto my back, my hand rubbing my chest as I fought to catch my breath. Beside me, Quinn was doing the same. He got up for a minute to deal with the used condom, then he was back with a warm towel. He cleaned himself, then me, then pressed it for a moment behind my balls. “You feel okay?”

  “I think my thighs hurt worse than my ass.”

  He laughed at that and then tossed the towel back into the bathroom. “Might want to up the weights on leg day, huh?” I turned to him as he braced himself above me with his elbow on the blanket. “Thank you,” he said, his fingers tracing my collarbone in a gesture I now recognized was comforting to him. “For trusting me.”

  “Thank you,” I said. “For being the one decision in my life I don’t regret.”

  ***

  Quinn

  I woke up an hour later needing to take a piss. Jay was beside me, snoring softly. When I returned from the bathroom, he was awake, watching me. Those deep brown eyes so focused on me tightened my chest. I blinked my eyes and made the clicking sound with my tongue. “Freeze-frame,” I said.

  He grinned and rolled onto his side, tugging me closer. Then he mimicked the sound and the blink. “Me too.”

  A strange sense of possessiveness swept over me. I wanted to stay here forever and hide Jay from everyone out there wanting him to be someone else. When he was with me, he was kind and caring and passionate. And not straight.

  I wanted the world to meet Jay. Not J. R. It killed me to think they never would.

  I wasn’t sure what my face showed, but it must not have been good, because Jay hugged me tightly and pressed a kiss to my temple. I sighed in his arms. “Hey, we had tonight,” he said. “And no one can take that away from us. Ever.”

  I squeezed my eyes shut. What if one night wasn’t enough anymore?

  ***

  When we woke up again it was morning, and we had five minutes of peace before Levi knocked on the door. Jay and I quickly dressed as he rushed inside. I took one look at his face, and I knew what he said next wasn’t going to be good.

  “Quinn, I gotta get you out of here. The crew is on their way with Doug.” Levi’s eyes switched from alarm to mirth. “He’s so pissed, but I think we got away with it.”

  My heart lurched in my chest, and it took me a second to clue in why. Disappointment. That’s what that was. Disappointment that Jay hadn’t been found out. Because if the truth came out, maybe we’d . . . have a future?

  And on the heel of that emotion came a nearly drowning wave of guilt. I was such a selfish prick. Jay’s entire body sagged with relief at Levi’s words. He’d been forced to hide this whole time, so it should be on his terms when he decided to tell the truth.

  So I beat my selfish desires back and smiled as brightly as I could at Jay. “That’s great we pulled it off.”

  Jay turned to me, and it had to be my imagination that I saw a brief flash of disappointment on his face, too. “Yeah, it is.”

  I stepped toward Levi. “So, I guess I should go—” My words were cut off as I was yanked back into Jay’s arms. He shoved his fa
ce into my neck and squeezed me tightly, so tight I could barely breathe. But I didn’t protest, not at all, just closed my eyes and hugged him right back. His head came up so he could whisper in my ear. “I’m sorry it has to be like this.”

  I melted into the heat of his body. “It’s okay.”

  He leaned back and pressed one last kiss to my lips. “Take care, Lucky.”

  I pulled a chip from the casino out of my pocket—one that I’d never cashed. I wanted it as a souvenir, but now I couldn’t think about keeping it. I placed it on his palm. “You too, Jay.”

  He stared at the chip in his palm, then raised his gaze to meet mine. Before he changed his mind, before he called me back and ruined his future, I turned around and slipped from this cabin with Levi.

  He walked me down the hall, arm in arm. Our heads dipped as the cameras walked by us on their way to Jay’s cabin. In the elevator when it was just the two of us, I sagged against the wall. “You’ll make sure he’s okay?”

  Levi nodded, his face pale.

  “I’m worried about him. His agent is pressuring him to stay quiet and audition for this pilot.”

  Blowing out a breath, Levi stepped toward me. “I’ll watch out for him. But you watch out yourself, okay? I’m pretty sure we didn’t expose you, so you should be fine—”

  “Don’t you get it, though?” My shout bounced around the four walls of the elevator, and Levi stepped back, clearly surprised by my rare outburst. “I don’t care about being exposed. Normally that would make me break out in hives, the thought of cameras and attention and whatever. But I’d do it if it meant supporting Jay. If he wanted to tell the truth, I’d be there for him.” I lost some steam. “I want what’s best for him, and I hate that it doesn’t seem like any decision he makes right now is best for him. How is that fair?”

  “Shit isn’t fair, Quinn.” Levi’s face was twisted into an uncharacteristic sneer. “You came on this trip to party with your friend and have a good time and gawk at the cast members, right?” The elevator stopped at my floor, and before the doors opened, he cast a parting shot. “Well, guess what? We got problems. This is our job. This is our lives. So just go back to yours and don’t worry about us.” The doors opened, and I backed out of them, unable to take my eyes off of Levi. He looked tired and beat, and while a part of me took offense to his words, I knew there was more to it. This wasn’t about me. As I stood in the hallway, the doors began to close. Levi’s face softened. His last words to me were a quiet, “Have a nice life, Quinn.”