Fraternizing

by C. C. Brown

  I turned and walked into the kitchen, grabbing a water and drinking it down in one long gulp before throwing the bottle at the wall, watching it fall to the ground.

  “I’m only looking out for you and Cassie, man.”

  “There won’t be a me and Cassie, dude. She got orders to fucking Lejeune. As of next week, she’ll be on a fucking plane to the east coast, and I’ll be stuck here, wallowing in this cesspool.”

  He walked into the kitchen, disbelief spread across his face.

  “What the fuck are you saying? You’ve gone through all of this—the hiding, the lying, the secrets—to just throw it all away because she got orders to another base? What is wrong with you?”

  “Don’t fucking start—“

  “No. You need to listen. You’ve changed for this girl.” He walked closer to me, stopping just in front of me. “You fucking love her, and I’ll be damned if I stand by and watch you let her walk away because you aren’t going to be near each other. Wake the fuck up,” he said, poking me in the chest.

  “Back the fuck up, Riley.”

  “Punch me, Alex. Do whatever you have to do to get the stupidity out of your fucking system. But walking away from Cassie, that’s not happening. You’ve sucked me into this, and I’m not putting my fucking career on the line to watch you throw it all away.”

  I wanted to give him what he wanted. I wanted to punch him, but I wanted to punch myself even more. I didn’t know what to think, and everything that I did think was wrong. I knew there was no way that I wanted to not have Cassie in my life, but thoughts of her being on the opposite end of the country made me sick with worry. I’d already fucked up on her, and even though it was an admitted mistake, I couldn’t shake the idea that the distance would taint her mind and leave her with no choice but to want to end things with me. I turned away from him and grabbed a shot glass from the cupboard and the bottle of Jack.

  “Grab me one, too,” Riley said, stepping over to me.

  I grabbed a second glass and let him open the whiskey, pour the glasses full, then hand me my glass. I threw it back and slammed the glass down on the counter, wincing at the sting as it traveled down my throat.

  “You need another?” Riley asked, holding the bottle up. “I’ll drink all night with you if this is what you need to bring some sanity back to your mind.”

  “I’m good, man,” I lowly answered, now feeling like my head was swirling from the sudden heat filling my body, along with the stress and anxiety of everything that I had been told today. “I need to call Cassie and let her know to just chill for the night.”

  I turned and walked out of the kitchen, shutting my door behind me once I got into my room. There wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do to beat the shit out of Allen and be able to keep her here with me. I was losing control. This situation came to mind before, and we’d even discussed it, but the reality of her being sent off hurt much more than the prospect of it. I wasn’t sure how I would come to grips with the impending separation.

  I called her, needing to hear her voice one more time before I forced myself to sleep.

  “Hey,” she said, sounding very sweet, exactly what I needed at the moment.

  “Hey. I needed to hear your voice, and I’m sorry for going crazy on you earlier.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I figured you were just upset.”

  “Yeah, but I should have channeled that shit. Anyway, Riley talked some sense into me. I’m not going up there. In fact, we both need to lay low for a bit and let all of this blow over.”

  “I agree.”

  “I’ll be up there early to see First Sergeant O’Hara. If they haven’t already removed him from the class, I’m going to have it done.”

  “Alex, don’t make it any bigger than what it needs to be. We have a few more instructional days and then we graduate. I’m good.”

  “Well, somebody is getting their orders changed. If they don’t get rid of his sorry ass, I’m not letting you PCS with him.”

  “Well, we’ll see what happens. I’m honestly over it. I just want to move on.”

  “I’ll let you know what happens. How is your crazy ass roommate? You’ve got me all sorts of worried about you.”

  “She’s fine. We avoid each other, and it works.”

  “Good. Well, I’ll let you get some sleep. I need some before I show up ready to break somebody in half tomorrow.”

  She laughed. Finally. Her laugh was a remedy for all sorts of ailments, and right now, I needed a hefty dose of it.

  “Good night.”

  “Good night.”

  I hung up the phone and lay there, staring at the ceiling and wondering how I would keep myself under control when I finally did get the chance to look Allen in the eye. Sleep didn’t come easily, so I took a long shower, jacking off to release the rest of the stress that was still piled up inside of me, then finally laid down—ass naked, on top of the bedspread and under a ferociously spinning ceiling fan. I needed any and everything to cool me down.

  First thing in the morning, before the stars had even hidden themselves away, I got up and went for a long run, hoping the still looming tension from the night before would dissipate before heading in to work. After four miles, it was still there, still loading me down. I jogged back home and immediately showered, trying to think of pleasant thoughts where Cassie was concerned, to keep the tension from growing. I hummed Fall For You while I washed myself off, remembering the beautiful smile on her face as I strummed the guitar on the beach, and she lowly hummed along. Those were the moments I want to think about, not this bullshit festering between her and Allen.

  I knocked on Riley’s door, calling out, “See ya later, man,” before walking for the front door. He came darting out of his room, wearing just his boxers. “I don’t need to see your shit first thing in the morning, Riley. I have enough traumatizing shit going on in my head right now.”

  “Fuck off,” he joked, the goofy, awkward Riley back. “I just wanted to make sure you remembered what I said last night.”

  “I remember, man. I’m going in to see First Sergeant O’Hara.”

  “Alright. Don’t do anything stupid, Alex.”

  I flipped him off and turned for the door, leaving with his words replaying over and over in my head.

  Standing in front of First Sergeant’s door, I contemplated the different ways that I wanted to approach this issue. I couldn’t give anything away that this was a personal matter for me, but I also didn’t want this shit swept under the rug. I needed to make sure that Allen got what he deserved, and at this point in time, it would be better coming from the higher ups than it would be coming from me. I knocked on the door, turning the knob and removing my cover before stepping in after hearing O’Hara tell me to come in.

  “Good morning, First Sergeant.”

  He stood and walked over to shake my hand. “Morning, Sergeant, Cruz. Sorry to have to bring you in so early to deal with this shit. Students, you just never what you’re going to get.” He laughed, and I tried hard to join him, but I couldn’t force more than a tight chuckle out.

  “Anyway, Sgt. Newsome came and reported an incident of sexual harassment between two of your students. And I know you were TAD during all of this, but as the lead instructor, I need to get your input.”

  I nodded my head, well aware of what had happened, and wanting to hurry up and get to what we were going to do about Allen.

  “Private Allen and Private First Class Bennett were apparently given orders to the same duty station. He expressed his dismay about it, to which she countered, and that’s when the inappropriate sexual comment took place. Now, I asked Newsome for his records, his PFT scores, his test scores, and I see a fine young Marine who lost his mind for half a second. When I spoke to him, he was remorseful and apologized profusely. I saw no reason to end this young man’s budding career because he spoke before he thought.”

  “First Sergeant—“

  “So, Sgt. Cruz, as their instructor, I have to ask, have you
seen anything in class that you believe I need to know about before sitting down with Sgt. Major Thomas.”

  “Actually, First Sergeant, Private Allen was involved in a physical altercation in the barracks one night, and I saw something very recently.”

  “Yes. That incident. What else have you seen?”

  His lackadaisical response to the altercation had my blood boiling.

  “I had the students pair up to work on radio systems, and Private Allen called for Pfc. Bennett to be his partner. The look she gave was—“ I stopped and ran my hand over my face. “It was more than not wanting to work with him. It almost looked like fear.”

  “Did you ask her about it?”

  “I did. She was a bit hesitant to tell me what was going on. She just said it was an argument they’d had, but I couldn’t get any more out of her.”

  He sat back in his seat, his arms folded across his chest as he exhaled harshly from his nose.

  “Listen to me, Cruz. The Marine Corps is knee deep in sexual harassment training, and we have a goddamned zero tolerance policy. I won’t have this shit going on in my company. I am going to scrape the bottom on this swamp and find out exactly what the hell is going on here. So for today, Private Allen remains in your class. You are to keep him and Pfc. Bennett apart. Do you understand that?”

  “Yes, First Sergeant.”

  “Good to go.”

  I turned for the door, affixing my cover to my head before striding out of his office, down the hall, and around the corner to mine. When I got inside, I quickly took out my phone and texted Cassie, forewarning her that she would more than likely be called in to speak again.

  Me: Just a quick FYI, First Sergeant O’Hara will probably be calling you in again. Tell him exactly what you told me and nothing more.

  Me: Oh, and good morning, Blondie.

  I didn’t get a reply right away. I sat my phone down on the desk and placed my head in my hands, wishing that none of this shit had happened and that it would hopefully blow over quickly. The door squealed. I looked up, and my eyes met with Jensen’s—cold and empty. He walked further in, sitting down at his desk and not bothering to say a word to me. The longer I allowed the silence to fester, the more agitated I grew, so I finally stood, walking over to where he sat and said what was on my mind.

  “I need to know why you like Allen so much.”

  He looked up at me. “Why don’t you like him? He’s just like you and me, Alex. He’s young and motivated. He wants to do well, and he loves the Corps. That was us when we were in his shoes.”

  “I was never like Allen,” I snarled, taking offense to the comparison.

  “Sure you were. You just can’t see it now because you have your dick stuck up inside of his competition.”

  He was taunting me, and if everything that had happened recently wasn’t stirring such a shit storm, I probably would have decked him.

  “I just know you better not be trying any underhanded shit where Pfc. Bennett is concerned. You don’t like what I’m doing, that’s your fucking problem. But she is off limits.”

  “I wouldn’t stoop that low, Alex. I’m not you.” He grabbed something from his desk drawer then stood and stalked over to the door, turning around to look at me with his hand on the door knob. “Be honest with yourself. If you weren’t fucking Allen’s target, none of this would be that big of a deal.”

  “Fuck you,” I growled, feeling self-control slowly slip away from me. My phone buzzed on the desk, and I reached over to retrieve it.

  “Your girl?” he asked, smirking as stood there staring at me. “You go ahead and take care of that while I get shit ready for our students who need their instructors to prepare them for their final exams.”

  He turned and walked out of the office, leaving me there to fester in my own shit. A tiny part of me felt like he was right; that at some point, I probably was Allen. I was young and motivated, only I hadn’t preyed on females the way he did.

  Or had I?

  Was my way the same thing, just done in a different manner? I hated my guilty conscience because it made me re-evaluate myself. It made me look in the mirror and stare at my glaring flaws. It made me see how far I had strayed.

  I stared down at the text from Cassie, finally allowing a smile to creep across my face.

  Cassie: I’m ready. And good morning to you too, Sgt.

  I put my phone away, hoping that what Cassie would have to tell First Sergeant would remove our Allen problem once and for all. Like him or not, the fact of the matter was that he was threatening and harassing Cassie, and whether Jensen liked it or not, I would break his fucking fingers one at a time to make sure she was protected.

  I sat and thought, long and hard, about everything—Allen, Cassie, Ruiz, Castillo, Jensen, Riley. Good and bad was coming from all directions, intertwining all of us in one big, mangled mess. Friendships had grown while others had been severed. My heart grew and my mindset flipped. Through it all, I couldn’t find the desire to regret any of it. It all made me think, but not enough to feel remorseful.

  Cassie Bennett had come into my life for a reason. And Camp Lejeune or not, I wasn’t about to let her go so easily.

  Chapter 30

  Cassie

  I went to class just like any other day.

  Shock hit me as I stood in formation and saw Allen standing there. Were they not going to do anything about him? I’d been warned when I mentioned joining the Marine Corps that it was a boys club. If Allen got away with what he’d said to me, then I knew it to be true.

  We walked into the classroom. Alex looking stellar and enticing as he always did. Jensen and Newsome updated us on our standings for the challenge, and to my surprise, the partner radio systems activity was factored in to our scores. I was still sitting in first place, but Allen had made up ground, and was trailing behind in a close second. I noticed the instructors making a concerted effort to keep us as far away from one another as possible. Even though I didn’t sit near him, they moved him even farther away, making sure that it would take an effort on our parts to get to each other, and even then, Alex would not allow that to happen.

  I spent lunch with Dalton, Lane, and Hutchins. Both of them had received orders to Camp Pendleton, just different units. They were excited since they were now an unofficial couple. It was nice to see them so happy.

  After lunch, Newsome escorted me down to First Sergeant O’Hara’s office. My stomach knotted up, even though I was well aware that I was in the right and had nothing to hide. Well, as far as the Allen situation was concerned. In other areas in my life I had plenty to hide, and it was always on the forefront of my mind.

  Newsome walked with me, making awkward small talk, but really not having much to say. Just as we approached First Sergeant’s door, he turned to me and said, “You just need to tell him exactly what’s been going on. Don’t hide anything if you want your problem fixed. You understand that?”

  “Yes, Sergeant,” I replied, feeling the weight of his words. I had more problems than he knew about, and even though he wasn’t referring to my other problem, my guilty conscience was playing tricks on me.

  He knocked on the door, listened for the okay from First Sergeant O’Hara, then opened the door and led me in. I removed my cover from my head and nervously held it in my hands, feeling overly intimidated by the bull of a man that was First Sergeant O’Hara.

  “Private First Class Bennett is here, First Sergeant.”

  “Thank you, Sergeant Newsome. That’ll be all.”

  Newsome nodded his head and walked out, leaving the door partially open. First Sergeant O’Hara signaled for me to take a seat.

  “How are you this afternoon, Pfc. Bennett?”

  “I’m doing well, First Sergeant.”

  He sat up in his chair, his stocky frame filling the seat. His dark, beady eyes stared down on me as his face went tight. My stomach clenched, twisting and aching the longer I sat in his presence.

  “I spoke to your lead instructor, Sergean
t Cruz, and he seems to think there is more to the sexual harassment claims that transpired yesterday. You do understand that the Marine Corps is pushing hard to eradicate sexual harassment from our ranks, and while we cannot scrape it all away, we are taking claims very seriously, and will handle such occurrences with an iron fist.”

  He sat up in his seat even more, those dark eyes growing more and more threatening by the second. His arms rested on the desk, his hands intertwined with one another as he stared into my soul.