by Slick, Tabi
“Hey, there!” Lee’s voice called.
I turned around and saw him heading my way, books in one hand and a giant bouquet in the other.
“Who are those for?” I exclaimed.
“You, of course,” he said, handing me the beautiful flowers, “Happy Valentine’s day!”
“Wow!” I gasped, immediately welcomed by the scents of alstroemeria lilies and roses, “Happy Valentine’s day to you, too.”
I leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek when his lips moved onto mine. It definitely took me by surprise, but I had been wanting this to happen for a while and so I wrapped my arm around him.
“Hope you don’t mind,” he whispered in my ear when I stepped back.
“Mind?” I chuckled, “I would’ve settled for a kiss on the cheek, but this is better.”
“Good,” he said, a huge grin on his face, “walk you to class?”
“Of course,” I smiled.
He took my hand as we headed to first period together. I was on top of the world. I couldn’t believe we were actually together! Despite how complicated my life had become I still had this one little bit of happiness in my life. When Lee was around I could almost forget the monster inside of me, the lies I saw all around us, and the secrets we had to keep from everyone just to keep from getting killed. Or whatever the Academy would do to us. We walked into the classroom and I spotted Kia and waived in her direction. She barely looked up and when she did she seemed to look straight through me. She did not look well at all.
“Hey, I need to go check in with Kia,” I said, “see you after class?”
“Sure,” he said, leaning in and kissing me on the cheek.
“Bye,” I waived.
I turned and began weaving my way through the aisle of desks filled with students chatting about love, or something related to that.
“Kia,” I said, taking a seat next to hers.
She didn’t even look in my direction. What was wrong?
“Hey, what’s going on?” I asked.
“Nothing,” Kia mumbled.
“No, Kia,” I insisted, “it’s not nothing. Something is wrong, I can tell.”
“You know what, Izara,” Kia spat, “Maybe I just don’t want to talk about it, okay?”
She grabbed her bag and stormed out before Ms. Morgan could even begin class. What had I done to her? This was definitely not like Kia to react this way to anything. Whatever it was, it must have been a big deal. Or Kain related. I rolled my eyes, realizing that that had to be what this was all about. It was Valentine’s day so Kain must have done one of his signature moves of being a complete ass. Were we really related? I mean really?
What did you do? My thoughts whispered out, hoping they would find their destination, and where are you?
I sat there in silence, completely ignoring whatever was going on in class at that moment, waiting for an answer.
Answer me!
My thoughts exploded and I knew that wherever he was he could feel my rage. Who did he think he was? He couldn’t just destroy someone’s whole entire day just because they had an issue showing affection. Suddenly, my eyes zoned out and I was no longer in the classroom, but in a forest somewhere. I saw trees all around me, felt a cool breeze and a raindrop fall on my cheek. I reached for my face and when I did so I was back in the classroom. I blinked to be sure it was real and sure enough, I was back sitting in my usual seat in the middle of English class. What just happened? I shook my head and tried to focus back on the task at hand. I looked down at my paper and all of a sudden I was back in the forest. I looked up to the cloudy sky, a flock of birds flew by, and sounds of rushing water came from not too far away.
Get out of my head, a voice creeped into my thoughts and my vision snapped back into the classroom.
Was that Kain? Was I seeing what he was seeing? But how could that be possible? I guess nothing was technically impossible in this world anymore.
Where are you? I asked.
Leave me alone, his voice filled my head.
Whatever you did, I responded, undo it. Kia doesn’t deserve this.
Now is not the time, Iz, Kain’s thoughts replied.
Why are you skipping class? I asked.
I wasn’t surprised when I received no response so I remained focused on the visions I was seeing through his eyes. There was something familiar about where he was at. I saw someone up ahead look over his shoulder and Kain ducked behind a tree. Who was he following? His eyes peaked around the tree trunk and I got a better look at who it was. He was following Chuck! What was he thinking? The sound of water got louder and soon we were right next to a rushing stream. It had changed, but suddenly I remembered where I had seen this place before.
Kain! my thoughts were rushing a million miles per second, do you know where you are?
What did I tell you? his angry voice exploded in my head.
I know, I know, I thought, but seriously! You followed Chuck to the Bartholomew brothers’ secret spot!
What? his thoughts asked.
Look! I tried to point ahead, but instead I was just standing in the classroom there stupidly pointing at Ms. Morgan with the entire class staring at me.
“Can I help you?” Ms. Morgan asked.
“Um...no,” I said, blushing crimson, “carry on.”
“Thanks,” Ms. Morgan said, her words dripping with hints of sarcasm, “turn to page fifty-seven.”
I sat down back in my seat, wishing everyone would just stop staring at me and turn their shocked heads back towards the chalkboard. I had to be more careful! I couldn’t even get myself to look at Lee, hoping he hadn’t noticed.
You still there? Kain’s thoughts asked.
Yeah, I replied, just having a moment.
Well, let’s please get back on topic, he asked, where am I?
Remember when we were…, I paused, trying to find the right words, ...captured I was telling you about the dream I had? Of how Lawrence took his younger brother to the river where they hid that bottle of whiskey in a huge tree trunk?
Sure, Kain’s thoughts replied.
I zoned out again and was back in Kain’s thoughts, seeing through his eyes.
This is it, I confirmed.
I felt Kain’s mind rush with the process of realization setting in, crashing like waves onto a shore. Chuck had to know. He had to know everything. He had a piece of the puzzle that we didn’t. But how?
He got to the journal before we ever arrived, Kain’s thoughts confirmed before my mind had a chance to catch up.
I had seen him speed off way before anyone else had even started their cars. It had to be true. But did the book even have anything in it about this place?
Your guess is as good as mine, Kain’s thoughts said, answering my unspoken question.
Okay, you being in my head is annoying, I thought back.
Kain chuckled in response.
What should I do? he asked.
I think we should wait until we transition again this Thursday, I thought.
Are you sure? his thoughts asked, I could always practice my boiling power on his blood.
I’m sure, I rolled my eyes, even though he couldn’t see my eyes I knew he got the message.
If Chuck thought he had all the answers, he was about to get a rude awakening. It was one thing to read about things, but quite another to see them in real life. My vision snapped back to Ms. Morgan’s classroom as a bell rang and everyone began filing out of the room. I quickly grabbed my books and headed for my next class. I felt someone take my hand and I glanced up to see Lee.
“You okay?" He asked.
“Yeah,” I replied, “Why?”
“You just seem...preoccupied," he said, “and what was that all about in class?”
“Oh, I’m okay,” I shrugged, "I just get a little too excited about reading Salinger’s work.”
“Really?” Lee replied, skeptically.
“Totally!” I lied, hoping that this was a believable enough cover for my strang
e outburst in class.
“If you say so,” he laughed, “do you have Art or Biology next?
“Art,” I confirmed.
“Ahh man,” he said, “I don’t think I have to get to my public speaking class on time and walk you all the way over there.”
“No worries,” I smiled.
“See you at lunch then?" He asked.
“Sure,” I agreed.
He leaned in and gave me a quick kiss on my cheek before heading off to his next class. I watched to make sure he didn’t see me head towards the exit. I had to find Kia and find out what happened. I really wished I didn’t have to always clean up Kain’s mess. It wasn’t like I didn’t have my own problems that I actually needed Kain’s issues, too. I had a lot to juggle and I was near the capacity of my patience. I made my way up towards the dorms in hopes that she had gone back to our room. I couldn’t even imagine what he could have done to make her so distraught.
Would you like to help me out here? My thoughts asked Kain.
With what? his thoughts sighed with irritation.
What did he have to be irritated at? I was the one running around trying to fix his mess.
With Kia, for crying out loud! I replied.
Oh...that, he thought.
That? I asked, not sure how to take his dismissive response.
She thought we were dating, he replied, which we aren’t. I guess she expected me to call over break and do something for Valentine’s, or whatever.
Ugh! What a mess!
You can’t keep doing this, I thought.
Doing what? his thoughts snapped back, defensively.
Playing with Kia’s emotions, I clarified.
Look, he replied, she’s the one that read into me asking her to the social. Most of that night I spent with you so I don’t know how she could have even thought of that as me asking her to be my girlfriend.
What do I tell her then? I asked, Do you even like her?
Yeah, of course I do, he replied, but she’s wanting things that I can’t be right now.
Does this have anything to do with what happened last time? I asked, remembering the one girl he had ever dated.
Ha! he scoffed, I’m not talking about that. I can’t be in a relationship with everything that is going on.
Lee and I have been working it out, I pointed out.
You might be fine with lying, he snapped, but Kia doesn’t deserve that.
My heart skipped a beat. What was he trying to say? Did he think I was actually lying to Lee if I wasn’t telling him anything about our transitioning or powers? He knew we couldn’t tell anyone about that.
Really, Kain? I thought back, We’re going there?
Sorry, he sighed, we just really don’t need these distractions right now. We need to be focusing on finding out who we are before we can even decide who we’re going to be with.
Fine, I replied, as you wish I’ll tell Kia the truth. That you think she’s just a distraction.
Iz, I swear… I heard him growl.
Then you need to talk to her, I insisted.
I hate you, he thought, irritatedly.
Love you, too! I chuckled.
I opened the door to our dorm room and heard someone blowing her nose. I sighed, closing the door and tried my best to think of what to say.
“Kia?” I called as I walked down the short entryway.
I didn’t hear any response, but when I entered the room I saw Kia curled on her bed with a box of tissue.
“Kia,” I said, coming to sit on the corner of her bed.
“He just texted me,” she whispered.
“Oh yeah?” I asked, trying to act as though I had no part in it.
“I know you talked to him,” she said.
I rolled my eyes. She knew me too well.
“What did he say?” I asked.
“He wants to talk,” she replied.
“That’s good,” I said, “right?”
“I wouldn’t say that,” she said, sitting up, “why do I even like him? He’s so emotionally unavailable it’s ridiculous. I mean, every time I think he’s being sweet it turns out that that has nothing to do with his actions!”
“I know he likes you,” I said, not knowing what to say about the other stuff.
Kain definitely had a tendency to have a hard time being vulnerable in front of anyone and admitting he had feelings for her would be doing just that. I knew he didn’t want to be distracted, but my guess was that he was more afraid of admitting he had feelings for her. It was easier for him to convince himself that his excuses were justified than to face the facts.
“You should talk to him,” I replied, holding her hand, “I think he just needs time. He’s only had one relationship and it didn’t end well for him. So, that might have something to do with him being so hesitant.”
“I guess,” she said, looking at her phone for a moment, “so you think I should talk to him?”
“Yes,” I said.
I could tell she was arguing with herself, trying to convince herself that it would be worth it to talk things out with him.
“You’re right,” she said, finally, “I should just talk to him. Get this over with.”
“Do you need me to go with you?” I asked.
“No,” she assured, “I’ll be okay. I’ll just text him to meet me at the cafeteria. Would you meet me there later? Maybe get some pie?”
“Sounds great,” I laughed.
I really wanted this talk to go well for them and I hoped that Kain would be nice. I liked the idea of the two of them together. They were so different, but seemed to compliment each other on another level. If Kain ever wanted to be with her he couldn’t just string her along, though. She shouldn’t have to wait around for him for no reason and since we couldn’t tell her the actual reason, it was just better for him to let her go. But in a more sensitive way than what he had just done. We had so much darkness in our life that we owed it to those we surrounded ourselves with to be kind. I knew it probably didn’t even matter, that it wouldn’t make us good, but on some level it had to help...right? I knew the full moon was just around the corner and whatever happened would be on us. I could still feel the bruises from last month. Perhaps one day we could either get used to it or find a way to stop the transition. I wouldn’t count on it. The next few days passed by in a blink of an eye and soon it was the eve of the full moon. I couldn’t fall asleep and so I just layed in my bed staring at the ceiling, wondering when it would happen. I looked at the clock and it was already midnight, but I still didn’t feel the signs of transitioning. Time moved slower than I could possibly imagine, but still at 2 o’clock in the morning there was still no sign of changing. I finally fell asleep wondering if this was the month that we wouldn’t transition...
‡‡‡
Light seeped through the corners of my eyelids. I felt like I was awake, but still asleep at the same time. Do you get it? That feeling of being in two places at once? That was what I was feeling in that moment. I opened my eyes, blinking as the sunlight beamed down on me. I felt the heartbeats explode through my chest and I knew I wasn’t alone. I reached my hand up to cover my eyes and saw the protruding blood vessels in my hand leading up to my black claws. It was happening. How could it be happening while it was still light out? We could be seen! I turned to see if Kia had noticed and it looked as though she had already headed out for class. I opened my mouth to scream as I felt the bones of my wings pierce my shoulder blades like spears, but I used every bit of my self control that I could muster to prevent the sound from escaping my lips. It was even more imperative that we stay silent since everyone was awake. This had never happened before, but I guess we couldn’t control the hour of the full moon. I felt the bones slither through my skin like a snake and soon my wings were full and complete. It felt as though they should have always been there, like an arm or a leg. It felt like I was whole again. I rolled my shoulders, letting my wings extend as far as the small dorm room would allow.
; Are you here? My thoughts whispered to Kain.
Yes, his growl responded.
I smiled, feeling the anger flowing through his veins. I stretched my hand out towards the glass window, the only thing between me and the world beyond. I felt it slip through and I jumped out through the glass like mere sand that it was. Flying through the air, I did my best to stay out of sight of all the students. They had no idea what they were missing while mindlessly going through the motions of life. Only in transition did I know the true feeling of living. All the power in the world was at my fingertips.
Do you feel them? I asked Kain.
The heartbeats? his thoughts asked.
Yes, I replied, there are others, I feel them. They are distant, but their hearts beat with ours.
We need to focus on Chuck, Kain reminded me.
I didn’t know how he could focus on Chuck when there was something more important at hand. Something inside me was whispering to me, telling me where to go and what to do. My body wanted to go towards the scent of the blood that made my lips water, but my brother’s heartbeat pulled me in a completely different direction. I didn’t understand how he could deny his inner calling. What we were meant to be. My human counterpart was a clueless mess, but in this form there were no questions. No doubts. My body knew what it was supposed to do and yet Kain seemed to be able to defy it. I felt the breeze rushing through the feathers of my wings as I soared in the sky. The crisp air should have made me cold, but nothing seemed to touch me the same way in this form.