Emily's Choice

by Heather McCoubrey

  Chapter Nineteen

  “I know you want to think it was brain activity in response to your singing, but I have to tell you to be cautious. We will, of course, run tests, but you need to prepare yourself.”

  “I understand,” Emily muttered. Could this doctor be any more doom and gloom? Grace’s hand had moved. Shouldn’t they be celebrating?

  They entered the waiting area and Clint jumped to his feet.

  “It’s not bad, Dad,” Emily hurriedly assured him. “I was humming our lullaby and Mama G’s hand twitched in mine. I asked to speak with the doctor.”

  “That’s the first sign of voluntary movement since we got here,” Clint exclaimed. “What does it mean?”

  “I don’t know,” the doctor replied. “It could be nothing. The human body, especially in a coma, is a mystery. It could have been a reaction to the singing, or it could have been completely random with no meaning.”

  “Are you going to run some tests?” Clint asked.

  “Yes, of course. She’s due for another brain activity scan, and we’ll check on the brain swelling as well.”

  “When?”

  “As soon as I can get the orders written up, we’ll take her down. Probably right after lunch.”

  Clint nodded.

  “How long do the tests last?”

  “It should take an hour or two,” he replied.

  Emily glanced at the doctor’s face and silently shook her head. He, Dr. Mosler, looked to be in his early twenties. He may be brilliant, but he certainly didn’t instill trust when you first spoke to him. He had a hard time keeping eye contact, and his quiet manner made you think he wasn’t confident in his work. Emily knew he was the best in the area and one of the five top neurosurgeons in the country. She knew they were lucky to have him on Grace’s side, overseeing her care, but when you had to speak with him, it certainly left you wondering.

  “Her, our daughter, Hope, will be arriving around lunchtime. She’ll be anxious to see her mother. I know the tests are important, but would it be possible to delay them until after Hope has had a chance to see Grace?”

  “Do you have a time of arrival for her?”

  “Her plane lands at eleven. I doubt she checked any luggage, so we should be back here no later than noon,” Emily explained.

  “I’ll schedule the tests for one, if that’s all right?” he suggested. Clint and Emily nodded. “I’ll see you then. And if any more movement happens, please don’t hesitate to let the nurses know.”

  Clint watched Dr. Mosler walk away. “What do you think?”

  “I don’t know, Dad. I want to be optimistic, but I am out of my depth here.”

  The rest of the morning went by fast with Emily and Clint alternating visits with Grace. Try as she might, though, Emily couldn’t concentrate well on her work. She took a break outside to speak to Phil, explaining the situation.

  “Emily, this is a delicate time. Do what you can, isn’t that what you always tell us?”

  “I know. I just feel like I need to be able to do it all. Kendra is counting on me.”

  “That’s ridiculous and you know it. We’re all a team, and besides, Kendra would be the first to tell you to take it easy and focus on your family.”

  “How’s Jenny today?” Emily asked, changing the subject.

  “Still sick. She called me this morning and I told her to stay home and work.”

  “Did she argue?”

  “Of course she did, but I told her you’d fire her if she came in.”

  Emily laughed. “Good call.”

  “It worked, so I consider it a win for everyone.”

  “Has Kendra called in?”

  “She left a message on the answering service last night. Said she was just checking in and she’d be in touch at the end of the week. I sent her a quick email and told her you’d send one of your own once you got settled and knew what the lay of the land was.”

  “Thanks, Phil. I’ll work on that email to her tonight.”

  “We got an inquiry this morning. A business this time. They want us to completely redesign their lobby waiting area. And if they like what we come up with, they want us to redo the conference rooms, too. I think we could have the opportunity to redo the entire office space.”

  “Wow, that’s fabulous. Kendra was saying she’d like to branch out into the commercial arena. She’ll be so excited.”

  “We need to answer them. Should I send them an acceptance letter and tell them we’ll work on a proposal?”

  “Yes, that would be fantastic. When do they want proposals?”

  “End of the month. We have a little time. Kendra will be back by then, right?”

  “Doubtful, they plan to spend the whole summer away.”

  “I thought they were coming back at the end of June?”

  “They were, but the kids are having fun and everyone is getting along. And the grandparents have begged for more time.”

  “The proposal is due on the thirtieth.”

  “We’ll get it done, no worries. I’m sure I’ll be back by then, and if not, we’ll still blow them away.”

  “All right. I’ll send out the acceptance letter today and let them know to expect our proposal on the thirtieth.”

  “Great, anything else?”

  “Not that I can think of. Want to speak at lunch tomorrow and go over the Thompson and Trudeau projects?”

  “Sure, sounds good. I’ll let you know if anything happens and I can’t make that meeting.”

  “Okay. Talk to you tomorrow. Keep your chin up,” Phil advised.

  “I’m doing my best to keep positive thoughts in my head.”

  “Good, they go a long way.”

  Emily hung up and breathed in a few deep breaths of fresh air. She missed the clean, desert smell and knew it would be even stronger at her father’s ranch. She liked the briny ocean scent in Boston, but nothing beat the smell of the desert.

  “Emily?”

  Emily’s heart stopped and her mouth dried up. She closed her eyes and waited a beat or two before turning. She wasn’t ready. So often, over the past twenty-four hours, things were happening before she was ready for them.

  She turned and there he was. Time had been good to him; she couldn’t deny it. His eyes were still deep chocolate, his dark blond hair still full and unruly and a little longer than was decent. Sure, she’d peeked at his face during Sadie’s video chats, but seeing him in person was so much better. He was taller and leaner than she remembered, but then again, she’d tried to block him from her heart for so long.

  God! All she wanted was to walk into his arms and listen to his heartbeat. She cleared her throat and stiffened her spine. She was hopeless. She was not going to fall back into his trap.

  “Hi, Jason,” she breathed, annoyed her voice didn’t come out strong and brisk.

  “How’s Grace?”

  “About the same. They’re running tests on her this afternoon because her hand twitched in mine earlier. I’m choosing to look at it as a positive sign, but the doctor is being cautious.”

  “How are you?”

  “Hanging in,” Emily said as she looked off into the distance. It hurt her heart to see him, be near him, even just talking to him. “I was going to call you later today to set up a visit with Sadie. She’ll be excited to see you.”

  “I’m happy you’re both here, even under the circumstances.” Jason brushed his fingers across her forearm. “I’m happy to see you, Em.”

  She moved away from his touch, noted his pained expression as she did so. “I’m here for Grace, nothing more,” she said firmly. “And when it’s time, you should know we’ll be returning to Boston.”

  “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were warning me off.”

  Emily nodded and turned to walk inside. Jason fell into step beside her and reached out to open the door before she had a chance. Deep inside, she was pleased. Outside, she fumed. The last thing she needed was Jason getting ideas of wooing her back and thinking s
he’d stay. She meant what she said two years ago when he had showed up at her apartment door before Sadie was born. Nothing had changed. Not then, not when he’d visited after her birth, or the third time last summer. In her eyes, he was still a cheating jerk and that was something she didn’t think she’d ever be able to get over.

  They reached the elevator and Emily pressed the button, tapping her foot as the elevator seemed to be taking longer than usual to arrive. When the doors whooshed open, Emily all but ran into the elevator and pressed the button for Grace’s floor.

  “In a hurry?” Jason asked.

  Emily made a noise in her throat, half hum, half growl.

  “Is this toe-tapping thing new? I don’t remember it,” Jason said, a smirk gracing his beautiful mouth. “Must be the city living.”

  “I’m just anxious to get back upstairs. I’ve been away too long.”

  “I’ll say,” he agreed.

  “And we know at whose feet we can lay that blame, don’t we?” Emily snapped, striding off down the hall as soon as the doors opened.

  “Yep, but it’s not who you think. Or who you blame,” he muttered, following closely behind Emily’s stiff back.

  “Daddy!” Sadie shrieked, leaping into his arms.

  “Hey, Buttercup!” Jason twirled her around and gave her a big hug. Kissing her cheek, he looked her in the eye. “How are you?”

  “Sadie good. Happy see you!”

  “Have you had lunch yet?”

  “No.”

  “Good, I’m hungry,” he said, nibbling on her neck. She squealed with joy and wiggled in his arms. Holding her close, he whispered, “I’ve missed you so much.” He glanced at Emily. “Mind if I take her to lunch?”

  “I have to leave soon to pick up Hope from the airport.”

  “I’ll keep her until you get back,” he said.

  “Jason,” Clint interrupted, turning off the visiting alarm on his phone. “You want to go in and see Grace? It’s time for a new visitor.”

  “Sure, give me one second?”

  Clint nodded and picked up his book as he sat back down in the chair.

  “I’m gonna go in and visit with Grace, and then I’ll take her out. Can you wait a few minutes to leave?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Do you want her back at any specific time?”

  “No. They’re taking Grace down for tests after Hope has her visit. They should take an hour or two, but there’s no reason Sadie has to stay in here, cooped up. Just let me know what you’re going to do and we’ll go from there.”

  “K.” He waved to Sadie and left the room.

  Emily watched him go and sighed.

  “You still love him,” Clint observed.

  “Don’t be ridiculous, Dad.”

  “Didn’t think I was.” He chuckled. “Pretty sure that’s what most folks call being observant.”

  “Well, your skills need honing,” she said, concentrating on her laptop.

  “They do not. It’s as plain as the nose on your face.”

  “Dad, I really don’t want to discuss this. It’s over and has been for a long time.”

  “It won’t ever be over. You’ve loved him since you were twelve years old. You have a child together. You’re tied to him for the rest of your life. That kind of love never goes away.”

  “He messed up. It’s plain and simple.”

  “Did he? Or was he tricked? Have you even given him a chance to explain?”

  “I saw it with my own eyes, Dad. I don’t know what he can say that will absolve him of that.”

  “Are you serious, child? Was he not drunk as a skunk? Was it not pitch dark inside that room? Was he not expecting you to be there?”

  Emily scrunched up her face. “How do you know all these details?”

  Clint sat back in his chair, folding his arms behind his head and resting it on the wall behind him. A self-satisfied smirk gracing his face, he winked at his daughter. “Because I have a wife who has made it a priority to have coffee with him every week.”

  “She never told me!” Emily exclaimed, annoyed at having her personal life be fodder for gossip between her parents.

  “Why should she? You weren’t listening to either of them. You’ve got your mind made up and no one, but no one, is changing your mind. You saw all, you know all.”

  “Well, that’s just fabulous. It’s no wonder he won’t leave me alone. He’s got you and Mama G in his pocket, cheering him on. I’m surprised he hasn’t made more trips out to Boston.”

  “He’s wanted to, but we suggested he wait. Course, the waiting has been driving him a little crazy, and I’m pretty sure he was out there last fall but kept his distance. He’s a man of action, and he’s been feeling like his small actions aren’t doing the job. Certainly haven’t thawed your frozen heart, have they?”

  “That’s rude, Dad.”

  “How’s it rude when it’s the truth? He’s been giving and giving for years. What have you done in return?”

  “I’ve given him visitation rights to his daughter. I let her video chat with him whenever they want. I allow her to call and video chat with him whenever she wants. I don’t restrict their time in anyway.”

  “Don’t you? You live in Boston, and he lives in Mosquero. She deserves to have a full-time daddy. And he deserves to be a full-time daddy.”

  “What do you know, Dad? Seriously! You weren’t engaged to the man. You didn’t walk in on him and Lila. The night before we were to be married. You weren’t there, you didn’t see, and you sure as hell didn’t feel my heart shatter. It’s still in pieces and I’m not sure it’ll ever get put back together.”

  “Em?” Jason asked from the doorway, eyes wide.

  “Mama mad!” Sadie announced, hopping off the chair and walking to Jason.

  Emily watched as Sadie reached up, wanting to be held by her father.

  “Are you kidding me?” Emily shrieked, staring at her father. She darted furious eyes in Jason’s direction. “How long have you been standing there?” She jumped to her feet, and even though it killed her, she walked over to Jason and gave Sadie a hug. “I’m sorry for yelling, Sadie. Mama needs a time-out. Go have a fun lunch with Daddy, and I’ll see you when you get back. I love you,” she said, kissing Sadie’s cheek.

  With one last furious glare for her father and Jason, she fled the room. Her heart and soul had been ripped open and Jason had been there to witness it. He had to know he’d hurt her that night, but damn if she’d wanted him to know just how deep it went. Why had her father brought all this up? All her life he’d been content to let her mother or Mama G do the serious talking. Now, all of a sudden, he had sage advice and wanted to butt into her personal life.

  Mortified, she fled the floor and burst out of the lobby doors, breathing deeply of the fresh air. She felt as if she were suffocating, the pain and agony of that night sucking the life out of her again. Would she never get over it? Would the images that tortured her dreams never fade?

  She had to pull herself together. She had to go back in there and do so with her head held high. She could still pretend he didn’t matter, could still pretend she wasn’t scarred for life. She would deal with him as she always had, at arm’s length and with latex gloves. She could chalk the outburst up to exhaustion and worry about Mama G. He didn’t have to know that all those emotions were purely because of him.

  She really had to get herself under control. She had to leave soon to pick up Hope, who was sure to be a basket case. Hope never dealt well with emergencies of any kind.

  Shaking her head, she couldn’t force herself to reenter the building. She sat on the bench just outside the doors and covered her face with her hands.

  She had to take some time for herself. She needed to find her happy place and visit it for a while. If she went back into the hospital now, she’d really lose her cool and that wouldn’t be a good thing. She had to remind herself why she was here. She was here to support her father, sister, and brother. She was here to help Sadie
say her good-byes. She was here to bury Mama G when the time came. And then they would leave. They hadn’t even been here for twenty-four hours and already she could see what it would be like if they lived here. Jason would show up at the most inconvenient times, and she’d never be able to get away from him.

  No, Boston was where she should be. It was good for them there. Sadie had many friends, loved her daycare, and was happy there. Emily missed Mosquero, missed her best friends, but with technology today, you were never that far from friends and family anymore. And besides, her happiness didn’t matter as much as Sadie’s. Boston was the only life Sadie had known. And Emily didn’t think it would occur to Sadie to want or wish it any different.

  *****

  “Should I be worried?” Jason asked.

  “No.” Clint chuckled. “She’s stubborn, and she thinks she has everything figured out. But she’s wrong and someone needs to make her see that. Hope hasn’t. Gina and Phoebe haven’t. You haven’t. Grace hasn’t. It’s time someone got in her face and made her see it with her own eyes.”

  “She won’t. I think I understand that now. She’s hell-bent on believing what she saw and she’s not going to let that go.”

  “She will eventually. I’m not saying you didn’t make a mistake. You did. But you can’t be wholly to blame for it. You were drunk, Lila was hiding in your room and naked. And you were expecting Emily.”

  Jason’s face turned bright red. “Uh, about that.”

  Clint put his hand up. “I don’t want what you’re selling. You think I don’t know what goes on behind closed doors? Obviously you’d already done the deed since she was pregnant then. That’s not the point anyway. The point is, she assumed and she’s made an ass of herself. The sooner she owns up to it, the sooner she sees how wrong she is, the sooner you all can be one big happy family.”