I sat there with the double satisfaction of knowing I still had the devotion of Nicole and that she had vanquished my enemy in such a satisfying manner. I really did feel at that moment that maybe my life could go back to its normal routine but as I started to get up Dr. Hodge motioned for me to remain seated. What followed was certainly a surprise, “Melanie Lindberg…that has a certain ring to it. It would look good on a campaign yard sign.” I leaned forward, “What are you saying?” He smiled and took my hand, “I have had a chance to really get to know you the past couple of years. You have an unusual charisma coupled with a dynamic speaking ability. You could go far in politics.” I smiled, “Thank you! Maybe in the future…” He interrupted, “Melanie, one of the Republican state senators is retiring soon and we don’t really have a good candidate to replace him in next year’s election. He represents your district by the way.” I asked, “So you want me to run?” He said, “Well, yeah…if you can make sure you keep your personal arrangements a secret I am sure you will do well; I am not sure you would get the conservative Christian vote if they knew you had both a husband and a wife.” I joked, “Why not? You don’t think they are ready for a female polygamist?” He laughed as he replied, “Not even in Oregon. And speaking of polygamy you should try to distance yourself from your husband’s religion. As you know most Christians will vote for a Mormon but others won’t so when you run you should portray yourself as a devoted wife but one who has maintained a non-denominational status.” I replied, “You said ‘when’ I run.” He smiled, “I will get you all the important forms to file.” We both sat there in silence a moment. I was intrigued with the idea of running for office. In fact my experiences in the past couple of weeks re-enforced my desire to tell him I would do it. He must have known what my answer would be because he further warned, “Remember. Once you commit to this you have to make sure the fundamentalists don’t think you are a Mormon and that they absolutely never discover you are a lesbian.” I quickly shot back, “I am not a lesbian!” He started to laugh, “I know you aren’t, I was just trying to rile you a bit. However, your husband’s connections can come in handy – make sure he goes back to church and maintains that good, clean family image.”
I asked, “He isn’t in church?” to which Dr. Hodge answered, “No, Nicole did not go into details when we talked except that he stopped going soon after you disappeared.” I had no idea if Dr. Hodge knew anything of Matt and Nicole being more than mutual friends…well, lovers so I did not inquire of any details. I figured it had to be due to his new relationship with Nicole which would probably have caused him quite a few guilt feelings. I figured I would find out eventually.
Dr. Hodge enthusiastically continued, “And Melanie, I can give you extra pointers on how to present yourself to audiences, fund raising, and the like. I think you will find it a far more rewarding way to apply your psychology talents than anything else you could do. Besides as your campaign manager I can have something to devote my own creative energies to. You will make an old man happy if you say you’ll do it.”
This was all very weird. Maybe destiny was pushing me in this direction. Vincent had introduced me to a lot of political ideas that may have been unconventional but had caused me to think. Fate had severed my ties to him and his wife but brought me back to my old life and with the possibility to not only take on a political career but maintain my relationships as well. And here was the only ‘authority figure’ I had ever looked up to outside the context of relationships that was encouraging me and willing to take a chance on me. How could I say no? I told him, “I’ll consider it…I’ll give you an official ‘yes’ when I fix everything in my personal life.” He replied, “I can contact Matt and Nicole for a meeting right away.” I sighed, “Can I have one week and meet with both individually?” He asked how much he could share of our meeting and I said, “Tell them everything about the kidnapping. Let them know I want everything back as it was.” He nodded his head and stood up. I thanked him for his time as I walked to the door and he asked me to call him so the arrangements could be set up. I cautioned, “I would prefer not to see my children until after I have a chance to talk with Matt and then Nicole.” He said that was wise and asked where I was going to be for the next week. I said, “I have to clean out my body, mind and soul and the only place I can do that is in nature. Give me a little time and I assure you I will not skip any meetings. In fact, set them up for early next week, okay?” He asked me to keep my phone on and I promised I would and that I would be somewhere within phone service until early the next morning. I made one more request, “Please tell Matt and Nicole not to contact me directly. I need this time and I promise I will see them the day you set up the arrangements.” He gave me a hug and wished me well on my cleansing quest. As he opened the front door I said, “Melanie Lindberg for state senate! Yeah, it does have a nice ring to it.”
When I left Dr. Hodge’s home I felt really excited! If things worked out the way I hoped I would be together with my loves again. Yet I wondered how much Matt suspected of my relationship with Nicole. And now that they were together that was going to be problematic to say the least. I just had to have patience though. I wanted to go back to the hot springs but it was late and I was unsure my phone would have service there so I decided I would drive to Eugene instead. As I passed Salem on Interstate 5 my phone rang and Dr. Hodge asked, “So how is next Tuesday at 9am with Matt and later in the afternoon with Nicole?” I asked, “How did they react to this?” and Dr. Hodge merely answered, “You really are a fortunate and blessed young woman you know.” I smiled and thanked him and asked him to let them know I would be there.
That evening I stayed at a nice hotel in Eugene. When I ordered dinner I found myself at first looking at the wine menu but I hesitated when the waiter came to the table. What was the purpose of taking in alcohol? In fact, why the cigarettes? If I was going to truly cleanse my body it was time to do so – and that meant a commitment to returning to the person I had been months ago. I ordered a soda, and when I left the table after dinner I left the pack of cigarettes in my purse there as well.
The next morning I awoke with a special type of exuberance! I got my things together, showered, and took off to the nearest department store. My mind was clear and I sincerely did not miss cigarettes or alcohol in the least. And feelings of nostalgia filled my mind when I was in town. This was where I grew up, and I had so many fond memories of nature and those overshadowed the bitter memories of childhood and school. I wondered where all the tormentors in my life had gone to. It did not matter though, they were as much ghosts in my past as…well, some of the people who had crossed my path and were nowhere to be seen again. Now I was looking forward to the first real love of my life – the outdoors. I needed spiritual renewal and as the prophets of the Bible had often sought solitude to get in tune with higher powers and energies so too I needed this chance to re-connect to my inner being.
So I loaded up on supplies, bought a little tent, a running suit, nice running shoes and a book that caught my eye as I was leaving dealing with near death experiences. I wondered what Bethany had meant in those seconds before she passed on about me and the true Jennifer being sisters. Had it been just nonsense from a person whose brain was beginning to shut down, or was it a true vision? And if so, did that mean that in a spiritual sense that maybe I had been connected to her daughter, and perhaps her, in a pre-existent state? There was a chapter on people’s relationships prior to birth in this life and that is what had prompted me to buy this book. Besides, I needed something to read at night in the woods.
Within an hour I was where I wanted to be. I parked at the campground near the springs, set up camp, and the first thing I did was go jogging on the French Pete trail. It was really tough as my legs were not used to jogging and my lungs put up a huge protest. I practically coughed up tissue as I ran, but I was determined to succeed at my goal of getting back in shape. I rested a moment each time I started coughing and then resumed my struggle. And I have to s
ay that in a few days I was back to running with few difficulties, except extremely sore muscles that even frequent trips to the springs did not fully relieve!
At nights I curled up with my book. I was fascinated by the accounts of people, and how many were unexplainable by science or psychology. I found the part on past existence really fascinating. It was something Matt’s church sometimes touched upon, but I had not given it much thought until then. If I had been connected to Jennifer, maybe someday I would be back together with Bethany. Yet what if that also meant I would have to be with my father again? Maybe people like him would be stuck with those like Vincent and safely away from the rest of us. That gave me some comfort.
These days were full immersion. No, not in Vincent’s sense of the word but I looked forward to eventually taking time and developing my primitive survivalist skills. I reasoned I could appreciate nature at an even deeper level if I could live off the land in the most primitive sense of the word. In regards to my purification process I spent most of my time exploring the forest and sitting in the springs. Once, when following a primitive trail I discovered a waterfall with a rope swing hanging from the mountainside. I had my own private playground which I assumed few people knew about. And while it was cold I enjoyed the mist from the waterfall hitting my skin as I swung back and forth into the cascading waters. I indulged myself as a child might until my skin turned blue. I did not mind as it was only about a hundred yard hike back to the warmth of the springs.
One thing I found interesting was all the comments I had from people in the springs on how much they liked my tattoo. Some I took as mere flirting, others as being friendly and…well, on Sunday of that week I was alone in the bottom spring and a couple of young Wiccan type girls joined me. We got into a very enjoyable conversation about all kinds of mystic topics. I think they were Wiccan since one with long black hair but with patches shaved above her ears had a pentagram tattoo just above her left breast and a silver medallion in the same shape on a necklace. The other with long dyed orange hair and her entire left arm and shoulder tattooed in runes and what looked like Celtic images brought up the Winter Solstice several times.
After a lengthy conversation on nature tapping into universal energies they said they had to go back to Eugene since the one with the orange hair had a mid-term test the next day. The brunette then put her hand on my knee. Our eyes met and she asked if I might like to come with them and spend the night. As I thought about taking her up on her offer she began to caress my inner thigh just above the knee. I would be a liar if I were to say I was not tempted. Yet the whole point of my spiritual retreat was to prepare myself to re-connect with Matt and Nicole. Accompanying them to Eugene would seem counterproductive to that end, especially since something was telling me everything was going to work out. As the hand of the long-haired girl moved and left little doubt as to what was on her mind I smiled and sat up, “I would love to spend time with you both but I have an important appointment and so I hope you understand.” She more forward girl said, “That’s okay; maybe sometime in the future perhaps?” I asked, “Can you leave me your phone number?” She gladly complied once she got out of the water and put her clothes on. As they put their packs on and started up the steps to the trail they waved goodbye to me. I almost asked them to wait but I waved back and relaxed in the water, yet I made sure later to hide their number safely in my wallet just in case.
So as my week of spiritual and body renewal ended I said goodbye to the mountains and headed back to Portland where I would spend the night in a hotel before the big day on Tuesday. I called Dr. Hodge as I neared Springfield to confirm everything was still on and he said it was. He said I was to meet Matt at our place – Nicole would watch all the kids at her home. Then, in the afternoon, Nicole’s mother would pick up the kids and I would be able to be alone with Nicole. It sounded like a wonderful plan, but as I became more and more aware of this actually happening I was filled with questions as well as anticipation. Yet again, my heart told me that everything was going to work out, and I felt close enough to the energies of the universe that I would not question my feelings. At least I hoped everything would work out.
Chapter 20
When I finally reached Portland a part of me felt like driving right through! I guess I felt like protecting myself from what could prove to be a very disappointing encounter but I fought that instinct. I found just a regular hotel and spent the evening. I went to bed early but couldn’t sleep, even though I had experienced very relaxing nights on a cold ground. In fact I even contemplated buying a bottle of wine to help me pass out but I fought that as well. I never wanted that part of my life to make a re-appearance.
I finally fell asleep and woke up at 7am. I realized that in a couple of hours I was going to be with my husband again! Unlike the previous night which was filled with anxiety I was really excited as I got ready and I hoped he was too. I quickly gathered my things and in no time I was out the door and on the highway. It did not take long to see the familiar landmarks of my neighborhood. I was unsure if it was excitement or apprehension but I ran a stop sign as almost wound up hit by a van. The driver gave me an obscene gesture but I ignored the jerk as I made the turns until I arrived at my home with Matt.
When I parked in the driveway he burst out of the house and greeted me with a warm, affectionate hug. He and I held each other without saying a word. I felt truly happy! He looked at me in the eyes and said, “Welcome home my love! I have missed you so much!” I started to cry…I had told myself I would not break down but I could not help it. I just grabbed him and held him for maybe another five minutes, not saying anything, just trying to convey my love for him without words – especially since I did not know what to say at that moment.
Matt broke the silence, “Maybe we should go in and talk.” As he held me by the waist and we entered the house I was bombarded with happy images everywhere. The family pictures I had seen every day before my abduction were as if I had never seen them. Everything that had special significance in my life prompted a flood of joyous memories. I was overwhelmed as he sat me down on the couch. He took a deep breath, “Dr. Hodge has explained everything to Nicole and I and I promise to be there for you ‘no matter what’ if that is what you desire.”
I wondered what he meant by his words. I feared this was a prelude to a change in our status, like…“No matter what happens I will be there at your side, as your husband.” Or was his statement simply, “I will be there for you, but…”? It was scary those first moments until he continued, “I was so worried about you. I desperately tried to find you and even hired private detectives when the police refused to investigate and tried to brush me off saying this was merely a wife taking off.” As he was talking I noticed he was wearing our wedding ring, which gave me hope things were okay. He continued, “Nicole and I did everything we could and spared no expense in trying to find you. We received nasty texts but nothing that would prove it was you. We feared the worse; so much so I had to ask Nicole and her kids to move in with me. She was so depressed I feared what might happen to her.” Nicole moved in due to Matt’s concern for her safety? Could Vincent and I both have got it wrong? Matt signed, “The first sign of life was a credit card transaction last week in Boise. When I called the store they said a suspicious woman with short black hair and dressed like a prostitute had used your card. I worried to say the least but just before I was going to call your phone Dr. Hodge called and told me your wishes.” I laughed, “They actually said I was dressed like a prostitute?” He gave me an un-amused look so I explained the events of the last half year. I gave him the same story as I had delivered to Dr. Hodge, and ironically I was worried how he might feel about my smoking and drinking. When I told him I was drowned my depression in alcohol he took my hand. He then surprised me. I said, “Have I disappointed you?” He smiled, “No not in the least. In fact maybe it would be fun to see what you are like when drunk!” I poked him with my fist and he laughed as we wrestled on the couch. Yet he froze and se
emed lost in thought. I could tell something was troubling him, but what?
I asked, “What’s wrong Matt?” He sighed and looked away towards the living room window. I tried to re-assure him, “Look, I want us to take up where I was forced to leave off…do you want me?” He sat back and seemed to start a new subject, “When Nicole moved in she was an angel the whole time. She took care of the children so well that they started calling her mother. She even quit her new job to make sure everything was as normal as possible when you were gone.”
At that he said that he and Nicole had started spending a lot of time together and that in his own words, “one thing led to another” and that he and Nicole had started having an affair! He bent down over the coffee table in a prayer-like position and said, “I am so sorry Melanie. Please forgive me. I promise you it will never happen again.” At that I think I must have practically sent him into a heart attack when I asked, “Why not?” He looked at me in a bewildered manner and replied, “Because you and I are married, that’s why! How can you joke about something like this?” And again I looked at him, took his hand, smiled impishly, and asked, “Like I said, why not?”
He looked surprised as he sat up and inquired, “So what are you saying Melanie? Are you saying you don’t want us to be married anymore?” I looked at him and asked, “Where is my ring?” He walked over to the mantle of the fireplace, turning to look at me twice before he picked it up. He approached me looking worried and gently handed it to me. I looked at him and smiled before I slipped it onto my finger and said, “Does this answer your question?” He then seemed to be in a greater state of confusion until I reached out for his hand and pulled him back beside me on the couch. I smiled and looked him directly in his eyes, “You know I love you and now I must ask…do you love Nicole? Be totally honest with me Matt.” He stood up paced the floor a moment, stopped, and said, “Yes, I suppose I can’t lie…I do love her.” Then I asked, “So why change anything? Didn’t you say that one of your ancestors had three wives? You could just revive an old family tradition.” He protested, “Mormons don’t do that anymore. How can you ask me to cheat on you?” I quickly shot back, “Is it cheating on me when I give permission – no, when I insist on it?” He sat down, “I am sorry Melanie. Is this really you? Please, maybe with some rest…I mean are you sure your ordeal is not what is causing you to say this?”
Deliverance from Evil Page 33