Pause

by CJ Adler

  “Good,” she replies weakly, barely containing her sobs. “You?”

  Jay pulls back from her. He gestures to me as he answers her, “Busy. Been preoccupied lately.”

  “Busy,” I mock him quietly, suddenly annoyed.

  He glances down at her and smiles a genuine smile as if truly happy for the first time in a very long time. “I can't believe you're really here.” He cradles her face in disbelief before hugging her again as she wipes at her watery eyes.

  I scowl in their general direction not so subtly before turning to Gland in sheer determination. “Let's get started.”

  “You alright there, Eela? You're looking down. Is that boy upsetting you?”

  He follows my gaze. “Don't nobody upset my girl, Eela,” Gland says as he lifts me up into a bear hug, thinking my name to be 'Eela' for real. He's talking to me as if he's known me for years. He's fond of me – Oog told him all about me.

  “That's just Jay,” I answer Gland, irritated by the obvious connection between Jay and his girl.

  “Jay, as in the man that Oog respects so much?” Gland asks and I nod. “I, myself, only got respect for that guy. He's a brother.”

  I roll my eyes.

  Is there not one person on the face of this earth who doesn't like Jay?!

  It's then that Blubber shouts out, “Cool Guy Jay!”

  I scoff when Blubs takes off to Jay eagerly. Nonetheless, I can't help but be thankful when he shoves FeeBee away to hug Jay too, completely pulverizing their moment.

  ***

  “Four hours! Four damn hours, Aqueela!” Benley complains as he finally

  returns with Oog, basically empty-handed.

  “I was wondering why the heck you took so long. I hope you weren't mean to Oog,” I lecture him, barely paying him any attention.

  “How is this my fault?! You told me to go with him!” Benely retorts back stubbornly, raising his voice at me like he did when he quit his job.

  Oog cowers behind me, afraid of the yelling. He can't handle conflict. I pat his head, trying to calm him down before narrowing my eyes at Benley accusingly.

  “ Look at what you're doing! You're scaring him!”

  “He took me around town for four hours. I've seen the entire freaken town.

  I've been to the heart of the city and I've even been to the damn countryside! He couldn't remember where he lived! Then, when we finally get there, all he takes is a toothbrush. A freaken toothbrush, Aqueela! One that he doesn't use! One that he uses as a door stopper despite the fact that his cardboard box doesn't have a door!” Benley explodes, clearly agitated and exhausted.

  I try to calm him down. “Ben—”

  “Four hours for a toothbrush, one that he doesn't even use!” Oog whimpers from behind me, terrified. That's it! That's the last straw!

  ***

  “Okay, Aqueela, I'm sorry. Can you let me out now?” Benley asks from within his wooden enclosure that Gland and Jam had made out of the goodness of their hearts. Needless to say, while Benley was distracted, I had Gland shove him in.

  “What's the magic word?” I ask, cupping an hand to my ear, refusing to unlock the makeshift door.

  “I'm not saying that, Aqueela. You can forget it! I've been in here for an hour and the tree house is almost finished. Plus, I really got to pee,” Benley begs, still choosing not to cooperate on my terms.

  “Not my problem, enjoy your new home,” I say, turning my back on him as I begin walking away.

  “No, no, no! Aqueela, wait!” Benley pleads, desperate.

  I obey and turn around with an innocent look, wiping my victory smirk off just in time. “Yes? Tell me why should I let you back into the world of mankind.”

  “Your Royal Highness and Majestic Legendness, please let me, a dire fool, out of my sublime home in spite of all the wrong I've done since birth, including my birth,” Benley, at having enough, finally complies to all my wishes.

  He must really need the bathroom.

  I grin, flashing him a megawatt smile. “You may leave,” I say, motioning to Gland to let him out. “But in future, please do refrain from calling me such cheesy names.”

  Benley glares at me the second he gets out. “But you specifically said—”

  I cut him off. “Tut, tut, tut!” I say, waving my finger in his face. “Silence!” I demand. “Or else,” I warn, purposely glancing back toward his cage.

  Benley pretends to zip his mouth shut before rushing back into Jay's house to use the bathroom. I grin to myself, satisfied. Man, I'm good.

  My smile wipes off of my face when I see Jay taking wood out of FeeBee's hand before helping her up the tree house to the roof where everyone seems to be finishing off the masterpiece that will be Oog's new home. A scowl finds its way onto my lips when FeeBee tries to nail the wood in, failing miserably. Jay gently takes the hammer out her hand, laughing along with her, before doing the job for her.

  They've been like this for the past couple of hours. It's infuriating, and here Benley thinks he has it bad. Nonetheless, I refuse to complain until Oog's tree house is finished. This is all about Oog.

  I glance sideways to see that Blubber has used scraps of wood to create himself a pool chair. He is currently lounging shirtless on it, his literal blubber exposed to the sun. He's hoping to catch a tan. I shake my head at seeing the black shades he has on. He thinks he's cooler than the sun. He's even got Jam fanning him down with a giant palm leaf.

  I stifle a laugh at seeing Blubber slowly fall asleep under the sun's rays. I'm kind of glad; he's been useless all day and whines about everything. He's been acting like royalty for goodness sake. I'm paying him to do nothing . I mean, Jay is paying him to do nothing.

  Jam isn't the brightest crayon in the coloring box but he sure has a gigantic heart. When Blubber asked him to fan him with a leaf, he just did it without complaints, only once comparing the giant leaf to his surfboard back home.

  I guess Blubber's blood-red skin makes up for it all. I was supposed to wake him up when he started to burn. I got distracted. He's going to be in a lot of pain when he gets up. It hurts me to just look at his red belly. That's what he gets for being lazy.

  Then again, I haven't done much either. I've either been playing fetch with Oog or I've been monitoring and supervising the others, telling them what they're doing wrong and making them fix it. Yeah...most aren't very happy with me right now, especially Jay since I complained about his work more than half the time. In reality, his woodwork is flawless.

  Gland, on the other hand, has been doing the heavy lifting while FeeBee, Jay and Boss Man do the actual building and hammering. Or should I just say Boss Man and Jay seeing as FeeBee is completely useless? I want to hate her, I really do, but she seems so sweet that her ditzy personality doesn't really seem to bother me much.

  I haven't spoken to Jay all day, not because I don't want to, but because he's been preoccupied.

  “My arm is sore,” Jam states randomly, not the least bit mad in the fact that he's been waving around a giant leaf for hours.

  I offer him a gentle smile. “You can stop, Jam. Heads-up, no one listens to Blubber.”

  “You alright there, kiddo?” I meet Boss Man's gaze as he swings a heavy arm around my shoulder. I feign a smile and nod, not quite buying it myself. He's obviously seen me staring at Jay in distaste. “Taylor has a terrible habit of pushing those closest to him out of his life completely; you may have noticed.”

  In the beginning, he did try to get rid of me on more than one occasion.

  “Who are you to Jay? He mentioned once that you're his acquaintance. He said that you offered him this house and the job he has now,” I prod, genuinely interested.

  Boss Man smiles warmly with a shake of his head. “Only acquaintance, huh?”

  I chuckle. “Jay says that about everyone he genuinely cares about. Don't take offense to it. Apparently, I'm still working my way up to acquaintance so you're in actual fact privileged,” I joke.

  “He was never a bad
kid. He was just misguided. He was involved in all the wrong things. I came alongside him and walked a long journey with him. Eventually, I got him out and offered him his life back. I'm turning twenty-seven this year. Jay's like a little brother to me. I look out for him. Always will,” Boss Man tells me, his explanation touching my heart . I didn't realize the two were so close . Jay doesn 't speak much about him , but then again , Jay doesn 't speak much about his life in general.

  ***

  The sun begins setting behind a cloud, the sky an array of colors. I snap a picture before turning around to take a picture of the completed tree house. If I do say so myself, it's magnificent. It's even furnished, thanks to Jay.

  I climb up the ladder to join Oog, FeeBee, Jay and Jam.

  Benley slipped out hours before without me noticing and Gland said that it was getting dark. He had to return home to his posse. Boss Man had to go and be a boss again—a sad life he leads. Blubber woke up a little while ago. He screamed in my face when I sheepishly gave him his money. Apparently, it was not enough to cover the costs of his 'beautiful body'. Yeah...he's going to be mad at me for a while.

  I told the guy to put sunscreen on! I told him not to use aluminum foil! I told him not to fall asleep! Okay, so I didn't, but I was thinking it. That's got to count for something.

  Jay and FeeBee seem to only be conversing with each other, completely ignoring the rest of us, leaving me stuck talking to Oog and Jam, not that I mind. We all bleed the same.

  Jam is probably the most laidback guy I've ever met. He's so chill. His new nickname for me is 'Flower' because, apparently, I'm as beautiful as a sunset on the sea's horizon.

  Oog is so grateful for his new home that he went as far as picking a flower out of Jay's garden before placing it in my hair. Truth is, I have a soft spot for people like Oog.

  “Well, Flower, I gotta go chop some waves. Keep crushing it. I hope to see you real soon,” Jam says before pulling me into a hug.

  I chuckle before waving goodbye, watching him leave the tree house via the ladder. It's then that I notice Oog sleeping rather loudly beside me as he snores deeply. Well, there goes my last companion. Fantastic!

  I glance up to see Jay staring at the ladder that Jam just used.

  FeeBee senses her friend's discomfort and offers me an attentive smile as she snuggles into Jay's side.

  I try to return the smile but my smile falters upon seeing the close proximity between the two.

  “Hi, I'm FeeBee!” she suddenly greets, her eyes on me.

  I raise both my eyebrows, puzzled. “I know. We met earlier,” I state, confused.

  Jay clears his throat, uncomfortable. It's almost as if he feels accountable for her stupid remarks. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion, trying to work out their relationship.

  FeeBee grabs me from my thoughts when she twirls a blond curl around her finger as her blue eyes widen in recognition. “Oh yeah! Hey, Aquala!” She waves giddily while getting my name wrong. “I didn't recognize you with that flower in your hair.”

  Wow…we might as well just roll the credits now.

  Something in her sentence catches Jay's attention as he finally acknowledges me with a scoff of contempt. “Did Jam give you that flower?”

  I pull a face, shaking my head before explaining to him that Oog gave it to me, surprised by the sudden coldness in his voice.

  “Then why does he call you 'flower'?” Jay asks, failing to mask his obvious irritation.

  I shrug carelessly. “Because he said that I'm as pretty as a sunset over the ocean?

  When I hear Jay snort I can't help but glance up at him with a scowl. “You fell for that?” he asks, frowning at me in disbelief.

  “Fall for what, Jay? He was just being nice. If you're trying to imply that what he said is not true, then just say so!” I snap at him, standing up, my emotions finally getting the best of me.

  Jay, at a loss, gets up with me in an act to stop me. “Aqueela, I wasn't saying—”

  “I don't want to hear it!” I cut him off abruptly. “Your opinion doesn't matter to me. Jam is right. I am gorgeous and no one will tell me otherwise!”

  Jay sighs in defeat. “Yeah, Aqueela, yeah, you are. I wasn't trying to tell you otherwise. I don't want to fight with you, can we just—”

  I slam the door to the tree house shut as I storm off, not hanging around to hear the rest of his sentence.

  In a fit of rage, I find myself standing just outside his family's front door. I frown to myself as I contemplate the various outcomes. I shouldn't be here. I should just walk away.

  I'm about to knock but stop myself. I turn my back on the door, prepared to leave, when the door suddenly swings opens.

  “I hope you're not planning to leave without so much as a hello.”

  Chapter 23

  You'd Be Surprised

  “Why are you being so quiet?” Mason asks me as he hands me a cup of hot chocolate that I had not so politely requested.

  “I'm just...” I trail off weakly, unsure.

  “You can tell me,” Mason assures me with gentleness. “I've changed.”

  There's a moment of silence as I contemplate his words. “Mason? When you told me it's always been me, what exactly did you mean by that?”

  He remains silent and I somehow feel like I'm treading desolate grounds.

  “We were six and you were sitting in the sandbox. You were trying to create a 'sandman',” he eventually summons the courage to speak.

  I smile, vaguely remembering it.

  “You were wearing a green dress and you had your hair up. I was only six but I couldn't take my eyes off of you. I couldn't find any solid reason to start talking to you so I approached you in an unorthodox manner . I wiped out your sandman like the immature kid I was and still am. You were furious and when you looked up at me for the first time with those big hazel eyes, I knew that I was a goner. It was the first day I met you.”

  My head snaps up in a rush at hearing Mason's confession. My eyes meet his chocolate brown ones, his gaze filled with sincerity. I open my mouth to speak only to come up short. It takes me a couple of seconds to regain my composure and find words . “Mason…” I make an attempt to speak . “I-I didn 't realize…” I falter, unable to come up with a coherent sentence.

  “I treated you like garbage and bullied you relentlessly for your entire childhood. It's my fault,” he admits softly, finally telling me how he feels. “Over the years I thought I'd get over you, but the more I was around you, the harder I fell. When we were thirteen, I came up with a solution to be closer to you—”

  I cut him off as it dawns on me. “Bells,” I finish for him. “You hurt her, Mason, you really hurt her. You led her on for years,” I mumble, annoyed.

  “I know. I was stupid but I'm trying to change now. Besides, I didn't lead Bells on. Somewhere along the line, I grew to like her. She made me forget about you for a long time and I was happy, but then Jay came into the picture and when you started gushing about him it just reopened everything I tried to bury . That 's when I realized I had to break it off with Bells.”

  “Mase, you should have told me,” I tell him sternly.

  He shrugs. “I was a coward. Last year at junior prom, I almost manned up and told you. I was with Bells when you made your entrance alone, dateless—”

  I narrow my eyes at him. “Yeah, I know. You made fun of me for a week straight for going by myself when I was only trying to assert female independence.” He merely continues, “Anyway, you stood out, at least to me you did. You took my breath away and for a moment, I swear my heart stopped beating.”

  Cheesy!

  He flashes me a cheeky smile, distracting me. “Why do you think I wanted to dance with you that night? I was going to tell you everything, but then…” He swallows and averts his gaze.

  “But then?”

  “Then I woke up,” he breathes out in defeat. “You were never going to accept me after everything. I gave up before even trying. It's why I tripped you on the
dance floor instead. Hurting you was the only way I knew how to connect with you because talking just wasn't…” he trails off in thought. “Well, let's face it, talking never works between us.”

  I sigh. “You're so stupid, Mason.”

  He takes my joke as encouragement. “I've never given up on you, Aqueela. I'm not about to start now.”

  “You should,” I reply, giving him a reality check.

  He shakes his head. “Jay will stuff up because guys like him always do. And I'll be waiting. It's not an ultimatum. I just thought it's time you finally know how I feel about you, how I've always felt about you. I will wait an eternity for you.”

  Then he's going to be a ghost.

  “Don't criticize Jay. You don't even know him,” I say quietly, barely restraining myself.

  He scoffs. “You'd be surprised.”

  “If more people believed in Jay then maybe he'd be a more considerate and nicer person. It's people like you who constantly make guys like Jay stuff up because you make people like him feel insecure and worthless,” I say angrily, coming to my senses.

  ***

  I open the door to Jay's house. He usually locks the front door. He obviously knew I'd come back.

  I shut the door quietly behind me, astounded to find the lights still on. It's then that I see Jay about to drift off into a deep sleep. I wince when he stirs awake, slowly sitting up before rubbing at his eyes, resembling a cute little child.

  I can't stop the smile from spreading across my face.

  Everything registers in his head as his innocent blue eyes transform into a darker hue of blue and a frown evades his previously puzzled expression. Immediately, he stands up and rushes over to me. “Where have you been?” he asks, frantic. “You weren't answering your phone!”

  “Were you worried?” I question as I sidestep him, unfazed.

  He ceases me in place by gripping onto my wrist, reflecting his panic. “Where. Were. You. Aqueela?” he asks slowly through clenched teeth, completely evading my question.