Pause

by CJ Adler

“Why did you drag me with you?” Benley asks, frustrated, as he keeps checking the time.

  I may have promised that he could leave in an hour tops and I may have lied about it. He's staying with me. This is a high-priority, exclusive, top mission that takes an entire day. It has to be done with perfection. Benley is my only option, seeing as all my other friends are sick of me.

  Jay cannot find out about this mission or he'll force me to abort it. I'm winning this time 'round.

  Then there's Oog and he's annoyed with both of us for reasons I can't seem to figure out. He's been acting strangely all morning. I think he wants us to stop our feud.

  “Dragged is a bit of an over-exaggeration, don't ya think?” I tell him before grabbing ahold of his arm and forcing him to walk faster in order to keep up with me.

  He frowns down at me. “In most cases, it would be a hyperbole, but in this case, no, it's not exaggerating. When I denied your request to 'chill-out', as you put it, you pinched me hard on the arm like a psycho before hauling me out of the house, hence me being here with you in the first place,” he reminds me in an irritable tone. “In fact, you're dragging me around right now!” He huffs in exasperation to prove his invalid point, motioning to my grip on his arm.

  “Debatable,” I reply back in nonchalance as I tighten my grip on his arm and shove him forward.

  He glares at me with those dark brown eyes of his. “It's not debatable when you're still doing it!” He gestures to my hand on his arm yet again so I quickly release him to get him to shut up and stop pestering me.

  “If you knew that you were going to be so grumpy then you should have just stayed instead of insisting on coming with me,” I reply back calmly.

  Benley begins to lose his temper once again. “Like I had a choice, Aqueela!” He growls, anger pulsating through his veins.

  I pout, pulling off my ultimate puppy-dog eyes. “Please, Ley Ley.”

  He rolls his eyes at me, resisting me in the process. “That look might have worked, but you calling me 'Ley Ley' just infuriates me more.”

  “Ben Ben?” I opt for a better nickname.

  “Not doing it,” he answers back, defiant.

  I sigh and flutter my eyelashes at him. “Fine,” I huff, dramatic as ever. “Do not prolong it any longer. If you must go…then just go,” I say in a hushed voice, waving him off before placing a hand over my chest. “That's if my heart can take it,” I add as an afterthought.

  Benley hesitates just as I predicted before giving me a gentle push on the shoulder, gesturing for me to keep on walking because he'd keep on following. “You've got to be the biggest drama queen I know.”

  “I know.” I feign pride, winking at him. “You're privileged to know me.”

  Much to my surprise, he sends me a rare smile but is quick to hide it when realizing what he's doing.

  “Ooh! I saw that!” I nudge him playfully in his side. “Better cover up or I might just think you’re human after all.”

  He chuckles at this before looking at me in earnest. “You're just lucky you're so cute or you'd be six feet under by now.”

  “I don't know why but I'm going to say 'thank you' and take that as a full on compliment.”

  Benley shakes his head in disbelief. “Just shut up and tell me what we're doing at the shopping mall in any case,” he demands in a joking manner.

  I knew I could get him to lighten up in no time.

  “Shopping, of course!” I squeal excitedly but Benley doesn't seem to share my enthusiasm.

  “You really need more girl friends in your life,” he states and for once I agree with him—Bells is my only girl friend. Other than that, I'm practically surrounded by guys, the inferior gender.

  “Whatever, pretty boy, I could say the same to you,” I mock playfully. “I'm the only girl you're ever around these days. How about this, we can meet girls together, but for different reasons. For me, it will be to have girl friends, and for you, it will be to find you a girlfriend.”

  Benley's dark eyes brighten up at my words as he runs a hand through his brown hair. “I can be your wingman for friends and you can be my wing-girl. I'm down with that, even though my job will take more convincing on my part. Your job will be all too easy—the ladies love me.”

  I scoff. “They're not the only ones. Their love can't compare to the apparent love you have for yourself.”

  He is so obnoxious. “Whatever.”

  “We're here! We're finally here!” I announce in excitement.

  Benley glances around, taking in all the fluffy creatures with raised eyebrows, puzzled. “When you said shopping, is it weird that my head jumped to clothes and not puppies? 'Cause I was actually looking forward to seeing you in different outfits and giving my opinion.”

  I ignore him and run up to the first cage I see. Fuzzy, cute faces are licking at the bars of their cages and waggling their tails as I approach them.

  “Ooh, Ben Ben, I want these ones!” I shout in awe, pointing to the adorable faces nibbling on my fingers lovingly. Then, from the corner of my eye, I see another cage with different puppies, these ones being younger and more energetic. “Ooh! Ooh! I want those ones too!”

  I'm about to run off again before I'm yanked back forcefully by my shoulders. I turn around to glare at the culprit. “Benley! Let me go!” I protest.

  “Calm down!” Benley reprimands. “You can't have every animal in here, you know. Besides, didn't you say that you're staying with Jay temporarily?” he asks and I nod. “Well then, how can you just adopt a pet without his permission?”

  “Easily, like this.” Before Benley can stop me, I call over the manager of the pet store, raising my hand and waving it around as if deranged. “Sir, I'd like to purchase all these animals!”

  He pulls a face, shocked. “I'm sorry, all?”

  I nod eagerly in response.

  The manager opens his mouth to comment but before I can hear what he has to say, Benley's already speaking, “Hi, I'm Benley, I volunteer to take care of her on a daily basis.” He points to me. “I apologize in advance for any mishaps, it's rare that we let her out of her enclosure due to…reasons. As you can imagine, it's very excited to be out and about. She has never seen other creatures of her kind before.”

  Before I can argue, Benley's pulling me away, mouthing to the perplexed manager the word 'crazy' over and over again while pointing at me and shaking his head. Once we're far enough away, he turns to me with a disapproving glare. “You' re insane.”

  I shrug. “I'll take it. Heard worse in this lifetime.”

  “Do you even have enough money on you to buy a pet? Having a pet is a responsibility and, offense, you can barely look after yourself. Don't think Grey didn't tell me how he almost drove you over the other day. The guy's got huge regrets about not going through with it. Can't blame him. Anyway, my point is, you're not responsible nor reliable nor dependable nor—”

  “Okay, jeez! I get it,” I huff, crossing my arms in indignance.

  “And you have Oog, isn't that enough?” He pesters on, wanting to change my mind.

  I avert my eyes from his and scowl at the reminder. “Oog is neglecting me.

  I tried playing fetch with him this morning but he wouldn't budge. I think he's mad at Jay and me. I'm getting this puppy for him, to get back on his good side. I mean, he even kicked me out of his tree house, said something about throwing a party and can't be disturbed. Can you believe it? He didn't even invite me. Me! Who doesn't invite Aqueela Lawson, AKA, party animal, to their party?!”

  “So I was right? This is about Oog,” he states the obvious. I'm tempted to give him a medal for finally catching up. “Or it's about Jay? It always goes back to Jay with you. I don't actually know. I don't get girls. All I know is that you and Jay have been bumping heads lately.”

  “No, you loony tune! This is about me focusing on other things instead of just Jay,” I lie as I walk back up to one of the cages filled with Yorkshire puppies. One of them stands out with his black little nose pro
pped up against the bars. I watch in awe as he paws and whimpers at the bars, sniffing my fingers before licking me profusely. “You're so cute, munchkin!” I coo, sticking my finger further through the bars to pat him more. He wags his tail in response and gives me a look; that's all it takes.

  He's mine. I will have him.

  “Almost as cute as you,” a familiar voice rings softly from somewhere behind me.

  I take my attention off the puppy to see 'brown eyes' himself. “Mase?” I question, surprised. “What are you doing here?” I find myself asking, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

  I scan the room for signs of Benley but he's nowhere in sight. Being alone around Mason makes me uneasy, ever since he insulted Jay.

  “I work here,” he states simply.

  “Since when?” I ask. “Shouldn't you be at football practice?”

  He sees my confusion and explains himself, “I quit.”

  I raise an eyebrow in astonishment. “You…quit?” I ask simply, not understanding. Star quarterbacks don't just quit.

  “I quit,” he repeats, confirming it.

  “But why? You were captain.” I furrow my eyebrows in confusion.

  “I needed change.” He shrugs, averting his eyes shyly as if not wanting to discuss it further.

  I stay silent, not wanting to push him.

  “The little bugger seems to like you,” Mason breaks the awkward atmosphere, gesturing to the pup yelping at me to rub his tummy again.

  “I guess.” I smile in bliss as I pat the pup.

  I take my eyes off of the puppy to ask Mason another question only to find him staring at me intensely, in such a way that it makes shivers run down my spine. I'm struck speechless as he moves in closer toward me. “Aqueela…” he falters.

  I already know what he wants to say but I can’t bear to hear him say it, not when I don't feel the same. I quickly react, speaking over him, “Since you work here, you can help me out. I want to buy this little guy,” I say, gesturing to the puppy.

  He blinks down at me, taken aback by the interruption. “Yeah…sure,” he trails off dryly as he opens up the cage and hands me the puppy.

  I follow after him and pay for the puppy, once again using Jay's earnings. “Thanks, Mase.” I grin, hugging the fluffy body closer to me, eager to leave. Mason’s presence is quickly becoming suffocating.

  “Aqueela, wait!”

  I close my eyes and heave out a breath, lacking courage as I turn to face him yet again. “Yeah?”

  “It's my break in five, wait for me?” he asks hopefully.

  Being the nice person that I am, I answer on impulse, “Um…no?” Surely, I'm allowed to make my own decisions without receiving criticism.

  “What?” he asks, shocked that I actually refused him.

  “No?” I repeat in uncertainty. “I need to go to the bathroom,” I excuse myself. “Yeah, that's it. I desperately need to…” I trail off upon seeing the crestfallen expression on his face. “Ten minutes, Mase, ten only.”

  He smiles a little at this.

  I go sit at a table outside, waiting ever so impatiently for his break.

  “What I miss?” Benley asks as he sits down in front of me, appearing out of nowhere.

  My eyes widen at his imperfect timing. “Get out of here, you moron! You can’t be here right now,” I order, handing him my puppy for the meantime. “Go on, shoo! Shoo! Scram!” I say, pushing him away in the opposite direction.

  He laughs a little but obeys nonetheless, not questioning my actions.

  It's not long before Mason takes his lunch break and sits in front of me, much to my dismay. “Hey,” he greets again.

  “Hey,” I reply back coldly, trying to get this reunion over with. I'm not looking forward to it.

  “Where did the puppy go?” he asks, glancing around. “Puppy play center,” I answer quickly.

  “Puppy what?”

  “Mason, what do you want to talk about?” I cut him off, getting straight to the point.

  “Look, Aqueela, I just wanted to apologize.”

  “It's okay,” I brush off the matter, having forgiven him a while ago.

  “No, it's not. I'm sorry for wiping out your sandman all those years ago. I'm sorry for always insulting you about your hats, self-confidence and well…everything. I'm sorry for hurting you over and over again. I'm sorry for tripping you at junior prom on the dance floor. I'm sorry for breaking your leg by accident in the fifth grade. I'm sorry for accusing you of cheating in that test even though I knew you hadn't. I'm sorry for degrading you around the football players and cheerleaders for my own benefit.

  “I'm sorry for blaming you when something went wrong in my life. I'm sorry for never being there for you when you needed me. I’m sorry I tried to kiss you when it wasn’t even a day after I ended things with Bells but, above all, I'm sorry that I didn't just man up and tell you that I love you when I knew I always had,” he confesses.

  My breath hitches, my words getting stuck in my throat. I wasn’t expecting any of that.

  Mason sees my discomfort and thankfully speaks for me. “I've never apologized for everything. I thought it was about time. I was an idiot, but I'm trying to change, to be better. I hope you can see that. I don't expect you to forgive me or—”

  I reach over and take hold of his hand, enclosing it in both of mine. “I forgive you, Mason,” I tell him, meaning it.

  “Aqueela, you don't have to humor me—”

  “I mean it,” I assure him and nod encouragingly, squeezing his hand to let him know that it's the truth.

  “You have no idea how much that means to me. It's a burden off of my shoulders,” he admits, truly relieved.

  I release his hand and lean back in my chair to meet his warm, brown eyes.

  “Well, you have no idea how much your apology means to me.”

  As I watch Mase walk away, thoughts of the past, things I bore a grudge over, things that I thought I could never move past, flash through my mind — from the constant torment to the laughter and mockery of others. There is Mason’s face in the crowds as the perpetrator, my tormentor. However, now, when I think about it all, I don't feel hopelessly nauseous. I can finally get over it and leave it in the past where it belongs.

  Getting up, I walk back in the direction where I last saw Benley using my puppy's cuteness to his advantage. Fortunately, he's still there, still using my puppy to grab a pretty waitress ' attention . Usually , I'd take my puppy and pretend to be Benley 's girl to mess up his chances of scoring a date , but fortunately for him , I promised to be his wing-girl.

  “We'll grab something to eat sometime but right now I gotta go,” I hear Benley say to the pretty blonde before catching up to me.

  From there, we head into all of my favorite clothing stores for fun, not to buy anything but just to try things on and get Benley's approval.

  “Excuse me, sir and ma'am?” Benley and I turn to see the manager of the shop approach us with a stern look. “You're both aware that no dogs are allowed in the store, correct?”

  I frown at the woman. “I didn't see any 'anti-dog' signs upon coming in.”

  “We have a sign, but in any case, it should be obvious not to bring your dog into a clothing store,” the woman points to the large, unmissable sign on display for all to see. “I'm going to have to ask the both of you to leave the store immediately.”

  “I refuse to leave when my puppy has done nothing wrong and committed no crime,” I argue, standing my ground.

  Benley gives me a where-are-you-going-with-this look. He tries to pull me along so that we can leave the store without further hassles.

  The manager hangs up a shirt with a wet mark on it. “Your puppy urinated on this item that hasn't been paid for.”

  I pretend to be surprised. “You have no proof. It could be an undisciplined kid for all you know.”

  After putting up more of an argument, the manager finally decides to take Benley and me into the security room. The security cameras show me quickly
picking up my puppy after he's urinated all over the fancy shirt. The manager goes as far as to pause the video on my face.

  Okay, so maybe she does have proof after all.

  Benley slaps his forehead in frustration at my stupidity for getting us in this mess when we could have just left peacefully.

  “Is that proof enough, ma'am?” The manager hisses at me, operating on a short fuse. “Pay for the shirt please.”

  Benley gives me a hard look, telling me to give in already.

  I ignore him and stomp my foot childishly, throwing a tantrum. “I shall not pay. That attractive woman in the security video doesn't even look like me,” I complain.

  The manager shakes her head at me for being difficult. She motions to the mall cop to take us into custody.

  Benley is handcuffed to me while I struggle against the mall cop, trying to overpower him. “Unhand me, you fiend!”

  We're forced onto the mall cop's little golf cart as he drives us past hoards of people toward the mall jail. All the shoppers turn to look at us in bewilderment. It's not often people are actually detained in the mall jail.

  Benley ducks his head in embarrassment, muttering how this is all my fault. I, on the other hand, embrace the attention and give a slow wave to my fellow shoppers like the Queen would to her people, a bright smile on my face as if proud of my accomplishments for the day.

  We stop at a small holding center known as the mall jail where Benley and I are thrown in.

  “Call someone to get you young fellows out of here. If no one comes, you will both be forbidden from ever entering this mall again, you troublesome troublemakers,” the obese mall cop tells us before leaving with the key, feasting on a sugary donut.

  “I hate your beautiful guts so much right now,” Benley scolds me, annoyed.

  “I suppose it is my fault,” I reply calmly, indifferent to our current situation; I've faced worse.

  Benley scoffs at my audacity. “You suppose?!”

  Benley sure does have a knack for getting locked up in places.

  “Don't worry, Son. I know just who to call to sign us out of here,” I say to Benley, stroking my puppy's fur in a menacing manner with an evil grin intact. I switch over to stroke his little beard instead. “I have connections.”