Pause

by CJ Adler

  “Meh, not gonna even try to get out of that one,” I exclaim, used to it by now. I open my mouth to say something more when my phone rings. I motion to Nance or Nancy — whatever, who the hell really cares — that I got to take this. “Hello, Legend Lawson speaking,” I answer my cell.

  Nancy rolls her eyes at me.

  “What?” Grams huffs from the other side of the line. “I could have sworn I dialed my granddaughter's number. Stupid technology. I miss the days when I could send a dove to deliver my scrolls.” Surely she can't be that old. “Legend-whoever-you- are, put on my granddaughter immediately. I need to speak with her.”

  I grin into the phone. “It is me, Grams.”

  “Prove it,” Grams replies back from the other side of the phone, her skeptical side coming into play.

  “Your favorite show of all time is Dragon Ball Z. You're convinced you live in England. You find your husband's false teeth attractive. You have hair that looks like a rat's nest and you own it with pride. Your new dishwasher is the best thing that's ever happened to you. Your husband is the worst thing that's ever happened to you. You've never read Romeo and Juliet. You think The Titanic is stupid. You have two sons: one’s a legend and the other’s a jerk.”

  “Go on,” she commands, still unconvinced.

  “You have a ridiculously unhealthy obsession with vegetarians. Your favorite hobby is 'couch potato-ing'. You believe that we're all actually aliens and that the real humans live on Pluto. Your life mission is to capture Bigfoot. You're way too invested in William and Kate's love life, and, lastly, you've been stuck in a midlife crisis for the last forty-seven years,” I conclude rapidly in one breath. “Bam slam!” I punch the air with my fist. “Totally nailed it!”

  I turn to see Nancy staring at me like I'm insane.

  “I almost didn't believe you until you said that part about my husband being the worst thing that's ever happened to me,” Grams replies bitterly. “Speaking of which, Aqueela, have you seen your idiotic gramps? He's missing again.”

  “Again?” I repeat, exasperated. That's like the seventh time this month. “Did you check the basement? Last time, you locked him up in there and 'forgot' about him for two days,” I remind her. She's a scatter-brain. It's a mystery how my gramps has survived all these years.

  She hangs up very quickly after that.

  I check the race to see Jay swerving in and out past the other racers as he overtakes Xavier, putting himself into second position.

  It's a few minutes later when I get a call from Bells. “What's up, girl?” I ask, confused as to why she's phoning me when she should be enjoying prom.

  “Your gramps is here,” Bells remarks, not bothering with a greeting. “It's scary. He's breaking out moves on the dance floor, busting out the 'sprinkler'. He keeps saying that he's looking for you, even asked Laiken for you.”

  My mouth falls agape at the news. If my grandparents find out that I'm at an illegal race, I'm dead. My grams will literally end my life.

  “Bells, you have to cover for me! Tell him I wasn't feeling well and that I went home or something,” I ask her to lie for me like the good friend I am.

  I refuse to leave right now. Jay needs me and he's my priority.

  “No, thank you,” Bells blatantly refuses. “I'm trying to avoid him. He's already hit on me at least ten times. No way am I being subjected to harassment again. Your grams will hunt me down if she finds out. She already refers to me as a 'hoodlum',” she complains before huffing in defeat, the good side to her always outweighing the bad. “What do you want me to say exactly?” She gives in, considering my issue at hand.

  How did Gramps even find out about prom?!

  “I don't know, just do something! Say something! Tell him I'm in Africa with a long-lost relative if you have to! Just get rid of him!” I panic, stressing.

  “Okay…and, oh, Aqueels, not to alarm you or anything, but Troy just called to tell me that Oog's tree house is on fire and that he swears on Oog's greasy life that he had nothing to do with it.” She breathes out casually as if it's merely a minor thing.

  Troy has everything to do with it. I just know it. I should never have allowed him to be in charge of Jay's house while we're all away.

  “What?!” I spout in shock, breaking from my stupor. “How the hell did that even happen?” I question, at a loss for words, stunned to the core by this latest news. We removed everything that could possibly cause a fire after Oog's last six fire scares.

  “M'kaybyenow!” Bells rambles nervously before hanging up on me.

  I try to call her back but she's obviously switched her phone off in order to avoid me.

  Damn it!

  I end up calling Troy next in order to hear his side.

  “Oh, hey, Squirt!” Troy answers after a few rings. He's usually so eager to get an actual phone call that he picks up after one ring—it's called desperation. Something is definitely out of place and it better not be Oog's tree house or Troy's face will be out of place too.

  “What's up?” Troy asks just as a thunderous explosion goes off in the background. There's some muffling and shuffling as he tries to cover up the loud, repetitive crashes coming from the background. “Is it my lucky day or what? I get a phone call from the most beautiful , smart, stunning , intelligent girl on the face of the earth,” he tries to sweet talk me, butter me up, for reasons beyond me. “What can I do for you, you scrumptious cheese muffin you?”

  Troy is never this nice. Never.

  “What the hell is going on, Troy?” I ask, sitting on the edge of my seat amidst all this current chaos. I need to know what's happening and I need to know right now.

  “Oh, nothing,” Troy insists, trying to brush off the apparent 'burning house matter' in that high-pitched tone of his that indicates he's not only nervous but also guilty of something. “Just hanging out, watching a war movie with my boy, Oog,” he replies back in a sweet, sugary voice.

  I hear a recognizable, detestable voice shout from the background. “Troy! Bring zie fire extinguisher here so that we can kill zie mother of zie flames first before destroying all zie countless baby ones surrounding zer!”

  I raise a perplexed eyebrow, puzzled. “Was that Ramos?”

  “Whaaaaaaat?” Troy acts shocked, feigning innocence as he lets out a fake laugh. “Noooooooooo. No, no, no. No, it was most definitely not. Don't be ridiculous, Aqueela. Why on earth would Ramos be here?” He questions as if I'm the idiot in this situation.

  “Because Ramos is your only living friend other than Max, your sister's boyfriend. Talk about sad,” I answer, straightforward. No need to beat around the bush.

  “Relax, Squirt. I got everything under control over here. I'm all over it. I'm in charge of the sitch, there's no ish. Nothing to worry about. Nothing at all,” he tries to assure me yet I'm still having a difficult time believing him.

  “Troy! Everything zis out of control! Nothing zis in control anymore! So much, so very much, to worry about!” I hear Ramos shout again, contradicting everything Troy has just said to me. His voice is followed by a bang and then another tumultuous eruption. “Zie mother of a fire is nipping at zie flesh of my pinkie, zie hot flames licking at my skin like I'm zie bright red, edible lollipop!”

  “Quiet, Ramos! Are you blind? I'm on the phone, you dumb face! Don't be so rude and ill-mannered! Let the fire worry about itself, good sir! We'll face it another day!” Troy shouts back to Ramos as if he really is in a war movie, temporarily forgetting that I'm still listening.

  Yeah, he'll face it when there's nothing left to face but ashes. He'll let the entire tree house burn down first.

  “My skin, he's melting!” Ramos lets out a pained cry.

  “Would you shut up? I'm sure you'll live. It's probably only like third-degree burns. Get over yourself. Don't be so selfish. I'm dealing with more important matters: Aqueela's wrath. This could go down as arson. We're going to need name changes and new passports. We're going to have to flee the country—”

&nb
sp; “Zie caveman's on fire!” Ramos interrupts Troy's harsh lecture in panic.

  “Drop and roll, Oog, drop and roll!” Troy yells frantically, forgetting to cover the phone with his hand like the giant idiot he is. I, as a result of his stupidity, hear everything.

  My battery dies straight after that.

  'Never trust Troy with anything', that should be my life motto.

  “Problems?” Nancy asks me, her eyebrows raised with what seems to be worry. She's usually unreadable so I can't be sure. However, she seems to actually care. Perhaps she's not as cold-hearted as she likes to think she is.

  The phone was on speaker. Thus, she heard all of it.

  “Troy always means problems,” I answer. “You have my cell number, keep me posted. I got to go!” I salute her before racing out of there faster than the racing cars themselves.

  ***

  I arrive, and sure enough, there's a massive fire behind Jay's house, the tree house now in heated flames.

  “Why didn't you just call me and ask me to watch the Oog and Slobber while you and Jay were out?” Benley asks me yet again.

  I used Nancy's phone and called Ben to come fetch me from the race place.

  Jay was my ride and he's kind of preoccupied at the moment. Nonetheless, Ben discovered Jay's bread and butter as a result. He made me promise to take him with to the next race.

  “I didn't want to bother you,” I admit. “Thanks for fetching me, I appreciate it,” I say, not really focused on him at all. I'm more focused on the fire at hand and the sirens of a fire truck close by. The neighbors obviously called them out upon smelling the smoke and seeing the fire in the backyard.

  “Anytime,” Benley answers with a smile. “Anything for you. I got your back, always.” He winks playfully before leading us through to where the fire is.

  “Troy!” I shout upon seeing him. “Where's Oog and Slobber?” I all but yell in anger.

  “Aqueela!” Troy has the nerve to flash me a full-blown grin. “What are you doing here, girl?” he asks, a sheepish smile intact. “Totally wasn't expecting your arrival. You should seriously help a brother out and let him know beforehand if you're coming over to visit.”

  “I live here and I did call beforehand.” I scowl at Troy. “Now tell me where Slobber and Oog are.” If this fire spreads to Jay's house, we're all dead. I'm not even kidding. Jay will unleash his fury and kill us all, even me.

  Troy scoffs. “Would you chillax? They're both asleep in Jay's bed inside the house.” Jay's going to have a fit if he finds Oog in his bed. “Oog was a little on fire, but I extinguished him quickly. The caveman was curious — you know how they are with fire — but, alas, I read them both a bed-time story . They 're both A-OK now and fast asleep. Have a little faith. I can be responsible.”

  He read them a bedtime story while there is a fire?!

  I give Troy a flat look and motion to the tree house up in a fiery bliss. “If you call this responsible, I'm truly afraid for your future.”

  The firefighters come running in just as I say that and begin taking care of the fire. It shouldn't take long to put it out completely, what with their help anyway. The single fire extinguisher that Ramos had been using is clearly useless in comparison to their equipment.

  “Look at the bright side, if the tree house burns down, at least we can play in the ashes,” Troy states casually as if to brighten the mood. I shoot him a look to which he holds his hands up in surrender. “I'm just saying.”

  I love Troy, I really do, but I've never wanted to kill someone as much as I want to kill him right now—even more so than when he drugged Jay.

  “I'm just going to go see to Oog and Slobber, make sure they are in actual fact alive and breathing,” Benely offers politely, reading my mind. I send him a grateful smile, in turn. I'd go crazy if I didn't have his support right now.

  “Ugh, is zie Split Ends.” Ramos throws the empty fire extinguisher aside as he joins Troy's side, a barely noticeable blister on his pinkie.

  I don't have the patience to deal with him and Troy at the same time—that's biting off more than I can chew. I focus on Troy instead. “Jay warned me not to leave you in charge. He stopped trusting you after you drugged him. I took your side and insisted you'd be responsible and accountable for your actions–”

  “I am accountable for my actions!” Troy butts in with protest despite having no place to talk.

  “Then why are they here?” I gesture to Blubber and Simo.

  “How should I know?” Troy asks, trying to play the innocent card.

  “Troy Story say Simo must tell Sprinkle that Simo start fire,” Simo interjects.

  I cross my arms over my chest and glower up at Troy. I shake my head at him, disappointed. Blubber and Simo don't even seem to care that he was going to pin all the blame on them. They don't care about the current fire at all. It doesn't faze them, not that I expected it to; that would make them normal.

  “You two, go home,” I instruct in case of something else dangerous happening. You never know what evil lurks when Troy is around. He keeps you on your toes with his unpredictable lifestyle.

  They, Blubber and Simo, surprise me by actually listening for once. They both leave, aware that I'm putting my foot down on this one.

  “Oog and Slobber are still alive,” Benley states in relief as he joins my side again, putting my mind at ease.

  Once the fire's been put out, the team leader approaches Troy to find out what exactly happened. The tree house, in itself, no longer stands. Everything is burnt to a crisp. It will take forever to rebuild it.

  Troy hands over his phone to the lead fireman. Apparently, Oog filmed the whole thing. The video starts off with Ramos styling Troy's hair in Oog's tree house. Ramos is listening attentively to all of Troy's whining and gossiping like any good hairstylist would.

  “Did you see how much weight Sadie's gained? She's gotten so fat. Those chunky thighs…” Troy trails off with a brief pause before shaking his head as if contemplating the scenario . “I just don't agree with what she's doing ,” he concludes as if it's his rightful place to judge others.

  “I zee Sadie's chicken thighs. Maybe she is having a rough time at zie home. I heard from zie grapevine that her 'rents are getting zie divorce,” Ramos, as expected, partakes in the petty gossip as he continues styling Troy's perfect hair.

  “No excuse to let herself go like that!” Troy interjects, having a DMC (deep meaningless conversation) with Ramos.

  “Did you tweet zit? I haven't seen zie update?” Ramos replies.

  I roll my eyes at the video. Nothing unexpected.

  “Don't get Oog started on Saddie!” Oog chips in, an attempt to fit in with them.

  At this point in the video, Troy is unaware that Oog has swiped his phone to film them.

  Troy snaps his fingers with sass. “No, Oog, bro! Don't you dare get me started with that girl! I get emotional! It's touchy. You're supposed to look after your body. Gosh! Idiots!”

  “No, no, no, no, no, no!” Ramos intervenes. “Don't get me started with zat chubby girl! OMG! She needs zie diet!”

  It's like a competition for them. They're a bunch of girls in a gossip scene. This is shameful.

  The video continues to play. Troy and Ramos tell Oog to take care of himself and Slobber for an hour while they go out to eat. The video clearly shows Ramos leaving the flat iron on. The video ends after that.

  The lead fireman is shocked by what he's just seen, especially since Troy's story checks out. I proceed by telling him that I, as the owner of the property, will handle the situation. There's no need for them to get involved further. Thus, after a few more questions, they leave, the investigation thankfully over.

  Troy claps his hands awkwardly as he rocks back and forth on the heels of his shoes. “So, look, I know this is a bad time, but when do I get paid?” My mouth falls agape at his question. “You can't be serious?!”

  “You said that Jay would pay me for taking care of Slobber, Oog, and the house,” he
reminds me of the terms and conditions we agreed on, the ones he so easily violated. “I have to buy a new flat iron.”

  I give him a fierce look. “You went out with Ramos and left Oog and

  Slobber by themselves! And then you let Oog's house burn to the ground! You're lucky I'm not pressing charges or sending you the bill for all the damage!” I snap at him, narrowing my gaze into a glare.

  “You know what, I'll just give you my bank account details and you guys can pay me when ready,” he has the audacity to say more. “You take advantage of Jay!” I hiss at him, furious.

  Troy furrows his eyebrows in genuine confusion. “But it's Bro-Jay; he loves it.”

  I sigh. “Just because he allows everyone to take advantage of his good heart, does not mean he enjoys it.”

  Benley jumps in at that moment and hands me his cell. “It's Nancy,” he explains as I take his phone to hear what she has to say.

  “Jay, Xavier, and Grey have three laps left. Jay's still taking the lead with Grey in third and Xavier in second. Emma and Landon fell behind. If you're to get back in time to see your boy win, I suggest you leave now,” she informs me, actually keeping me updated.

  “Thanks, Nancy,” I reply. Before I can say anything more, she hangs up on me without so much as a 'goodbye'. Baby steps, I suppose. I turn to Troy and throw an accusing finger at his face. “I'll deal with you later.”

  Troy gulps in fear. “Aww, c'mon! It was Ramos' fault!”

  I ignore him and grab Benley by the arm, taking him aside. “Take me back to the tracks, Mr. Lag…” I pause mid-sentence, remembering my manners, “please.”

  Benley nods. “Sure. After I drop you off, I'll come back here and make sure that everyone stays out of further trouble.”

  I kiss his cheek, grateful that I have him to count on. “You're the bestest!”

  “Don't I know it?”

  “Not you, Troy!”

  ***

  “He's been getting antsy,” Nancy tells me, initiating conversation as she refers to Xavier who keeps gunning for Grey. Jay's ahead of the two. Nonetheless, the three of them are on their last lap while all the other racers are some distance behind.