Watch Over My Child: Book Three in the Michal's Destiny Series

by Roberta Kagan

  “When he returned the next day, I had James ready to go. Everything he owned was packed in a small cloth bag. ‘You’re making the right decision,’ Charles said to me. He took my son in his arms and I put the handle of the bag in his hand. Then quietly they left. I never felt so alone or lost in all of my life. I wept. I don’t know for how long. But the following day, I got up and went to look for work. The small bit of money I had saved was running low, and now I had time to go to a job. As I passed the trash can outside the building I happened to see the bag I’d packed with James’s things in it. Charles had tossed James’s past into the garbage, along with me.”

  “Have you ever seen your son again?”

  “I never saw him again. I tried, but I when I went to the house, the housekeeper would not allow me to come in. Then one day I read in the paper that James and his father were killed in a boating accident.”

  “Your son is dead?”

  “Yes. And I blame Charles for everything. Everything.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “So am I.”

  CHAPTER 7

  1939 Gilde London

  Because of her language difficulties, Gilde was behind in school. But with Jane’s help, she was advancing.

  Thomas walked Jane and Gilde home from school. He stood outside the Kendall home talking to them for several minutes. He was tall and well built, with eyes and a smile that could melt a girl’s heart. Gilde tried hard not to be taken in by Thomas’s charm and good looks. But she was only fourteen and it was difficult not to be swept up like all of the other girls were by Thomas. She watched them together and was envious, Jane who at sixteen was already a classic beauty, and Thomas, who in her mind was a handsome hero. In Gilde’s mind the two of them looked like something out of one of her romance novels. How could she not secretly want to be Jane? Wouldn’t every girl want that? It was nothing but a fantasy, this longing to be in the arms of a good-looking man like Thomas. Nothing but a dream. Still, Gilde knew that she should not even be thinking about Thomas in that way because Jane had told her that she was falling in love with him.

  As time passed and Gilde got to know Thomas better, she began to observe things she’d not seen before. Like when Thomas talked to Gilde and Jane, it looked like his feelings for Jane were not nearly as strong as hers were for him. But what Gilde began to notice was that, unless she was imagining it, Thomas was attracted to her. As much as that had been a fantasy of hers, the reality of it frightened her. Because no matter how much she liked him, Gilde would never betray Jane.

  They had walked home from school one afternoon as they did every day, spending the last few minutes talking outside before Thomas left. Jane and Gilde then went into the house. Jane was exceptionally giddy. She was making jokes and the sweet chime of her laughter was contagious. They shared the camaraderie of best friends who were akin to sisters. Gilde knew how fortunate she was to have Jane as a friend. After all, when Gilde first arrived it was Jane who pulled Gilde out of her depression and helped her to make friends in her new home. Because of Gilde’s constant social interactions with Jane and her friends, she was quickly learning English. Gilde spoke English with a German accent. If not for Jane’s protection the other’s might not have accepted Gilde. But, because they were all friends of Jane’s the boys called Gilde’s accent cute. If it had not been for Jane, Gilde would surely have been ostracized for her German background. But, Jane made it clear to everyone that Gilde was no friend to Hitler. Some of the other children in school made anti-Semitic remarks to Gilde, and when they did, Jane was the first to defend her friend. And so, as time ticked by, Gilde began to feel at home in her new country.

  Many nights the two girls stayed up late talking in bed even though they had to be up early for school. They whispered so as not to wake the family. Gilde talked about her parents and her sister. But Jane couldn’t think of anything except Thomas. She talked about him incessantly and told Gilde how he had kissed her once. It was the quick peck of an inexperienced boy, but to Jane it was reassurance that she and Thomas were destined to be together forever.

  A few days later when the girls got home from school and before dinner, the girls went into the room they shared and laid their books down on the desk. Then they both changed from their school uniforms into more relaxed clothing.

  “I think he’s going to ask me to the Winter Wonderland dance.” Jane giggled. The entire school was buzzing with excitement about the upcoming event. Jane already had several invitations. She was popular, because she had all the qualities that the girls admired. She was pretty, perky, friendly, and smart. It seemed to Gilde that everyone liked Jane. But, Jane would smile sweetly as she refused the invitations from the other boys because she was waiting for Thomas. And although Gilde was two years younger, the older boys were just as interested in her as they were in Jane, but in a different way. Where Jane was the sweet innocent girl next door, Gilde was foreign, exciting and exotic. The boys were intrigued, but they weren’t sure she would make good wife material. Their mothers wouldn’t be so eager for them to marry a Jewish girl from of all places, Germany. Something about Gilde was blatantly sexy. Her long golden hair and curvy body put thoughts into their heads that kept them up at night acting in ways that they were ashamed of in the morning. However, for Gilde, Britain was becoming a lovely place to live. It was not that she didn’t miss her family, she did, but she was still young, and because of Jane she was adapting. Gilde was quickly becoming a part of a group of friends that made her life fun and exciting.

  Standing together Jane and Gilde were physical polar opposites. One dark, one light; one tall, one short, but anyone could see they were the best of friends.

  The lunch table where Gilde and Jane sat every day with their friends was starting to clear out. The bell had rung and everyone had five minutes to get to class. Gilde gathered her books and began to clean up the small area where she’d sat.

  “Wait, I need to talk to you,” Jane told Gilde.

  “I don’t want to be late,” Gilde said.

  “It’s important. Please?”

  “Alright” Gilde put her books back on the table and sat down. She was never late, so if Jane needed her, she would stay, and if it meant that the teacher would yell at her and embarrass her in front of the class for being late, then so be it.

  “Thomas asked me….” Jane was shaking. Gilde could see that she was excited but nervous too.

  “To the dance?”

  “Yes!”

  “When did he ask?”

  “I was sitting here at the lunch table. You know I always get out of science class early. No one was here in the lunchroom yet. Thomas must have known that I get here early every day, because he came walking into the cafeteria and didn’t seem at all surprised to see me. Then he just walked over as casual as anything and asked me.”

  “And you waited all through lunch to tell me? You must have been going crazy keeping quiet. Gilde asked. She was smiling broadly. She knew how much this invitation meant to Jane.

  “I had to. There were too many people around to talk about it during lunch.” Jane giggled. “I am so excited.”

  “You really like him.”

  “You know I do.”

  Gilde smiled. “Yes, I do know and I’m so happy for you.” She was glad to see Jane so happy. It would be nice to feel that way about someone.

  “Who are you going to go with?” Jane asked.

  “I don’t know. There is no one I am especially interested in.” Gilde shrugged her shoulders.

  “You look sad, what’s wrong?” Jane looked at Gilde, concerned. “I know a few of the fellows asked you to the dance.”

  “Yes, they did, but I don’t really like any of them.”

  “So what is it?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Yes, you do ... come on … let’s have it.” Jane studied Gilde’s eyes..

  “Even if I did have someone to go with, I don’t have a dress that is fancy enough for a dance.”


  “You silly goose. Did you think I wasn’t going to let you wear one of my dresses? Of course. I planned on it. Listen, how about this … you get first pick from all of my dresses. Even before I choose.”

  “I couldn’t do that. You pick first, then, if you’re sure it’s okay, I’ll choose from what’s left.”

  “Yes, it’s okay. I want you to go to the dance. And I want you to look beautiful, so after school we’ll raid the closet and find the perfect dress for you.”

  “Oh, Jane, you are so good to me. You are such a good friend.” Gilde smiled. Jane rubbed Gilde’s shoulder and got up.

  “But for now we’d better hurry up. The second bell already rang, and we are both really late.” Jane said as she got up. Gilde followed her. Then they began to walk down the hall together towards their classes.

  “If you’re sure you don’t have anyone special you want to go with, do you want me to see if Thomas has a friend? Then we could double date.”

  “Sure. That would be fun.”

  “It would, wouldn’t it?” Jane said, smiling. Then she turned the corner to her class and Gilde kept going straight ahead to hers.

  CHAPTER 8

  The Dance

  Thomas did have a friend, Brian Rolly But unlike Thomas who was popular and athletic, he was a quiet, studious boy with thick glasses. The two boys arrived at Jane’s house, each of them carrying a corsage with a single white carnation for their dates. Gilde was surprised that Thomas had chosen Brian as her date. He had so many other friends and Brian seemed so dull.

  Both girls had spent hours getting ready. They had set their hair in pin curls the night before, then took them out and carefully styled their hair in waves. Now that they were dressed in their party attire they were excited. The two couples walked towards the school. Jane, usually so vivacious, was quiet. Her infatuation with Thomas made her self-conscious and shy. Since Gilde was not invested emotionally in either boy, she felt free to be herself and so she did most of the talking. She had a wonderful gift of making people laugh by finding the smallest idiosyncrasies in her teachers and friends and then mimicking their voices. However, her jokes were all in good fun and never malicious. She was even able to imitate Thomas so well that when she did he roared with laughter.

  They arrived at the school. The gymnasium was decorated for the dance.

  “Would you girls like us to go and get you some punch?” Thomas asked.

  “Yes, thank you,” Jane answered.

  “Gilde? Would you like some punch?” Thomas cleared his throat and looked over at Brian.

  “Yes, Gilde. Would you like some punch?” Brian asked.

  Gilde laughed. “Sure, two glasses are better than one.”

  “NO, I meant can I…?” Brian stammered.

  “I was only joking. Of course, Brian, I would love a glass of punch,” Gilde said, and she noticed Thomas smiling.

  Thomas asked Jane to dance. As Thomas took Jane’s hand and led her to the dance floor, Gilde looked at Brian.

  “I’m not much of a dancer, I’m afraid,” he said. So, Gilde and Brian sat on the chairs that had been set up in a row around the circumference of the dance floor. There was very little to talk about. Brian stared at his shoes and Gilde hummed along with the music. Jane and Thomas danced two dances then headed back over to Gilde and Brian.

  “I’m going to ask Gilde to dance, if it’s all right with you,” Thomas said to Jane. “It’s not fair to her that Brian doesn’t dance.”

  “No, it’s fine. I quite agree. In fact it’s very kind of you.” Jane looked up into Thomas’s crystal blue eyes and smiled. It’s no wonder all the girls want to go out with him, he is handsome and such a gentleman. I can’t believe I am so lucky to be his date tonight, she thought.

  Thomas led Gilde to the dance floor. He put his arm about her waist and they began whirl around the room. “You look quite lovely tonight,” he said.

  Gilde giggled. “Thanks,” she said.

  “The gold in that gown accents your topaz eyes. You know your eyes are the same color as a topaz stone, but they have tiny bits of glittering gold.”

  “Oh….” Gilde was embarrassed and at a loss for words.

  “It’s true.”

  She looked down. He put his hand under her chin and raised her face so that their eyes met. “It is true….”

  “Jane picked it out. It’s her dress,” Gilde said. Gilde had never thought of herself as pretty. She always thought of herself as funny, but never as a beauty.

  “Well, Jane is a sweetheart, isn’t she?”

  “Yes, she is. She is my best friend. When I arrived here in England I had no one. Her family took me in and they treat me like one of their own children. And well, Jane, she has been like a sister … and like an angel.”

  “But … she is not nearly as beautiful as you. You know, I asked Jane to the dance because I was sure that she would find a way to bring you with her. I didn’t know if you would have a date or not, but I knew that if I was with Jane, I would see you. And then when Jane asked me to bring another fellow. Well, I thought ... that’s perfect. I’ll bring the least attractive fellow I know and then Gilde will have to notice me.”

  Gilde wanted to run away. Her head was spinning with so many conflicting emotions. While she was surprised and flattered and his words made her heartbeat quicken, Gilde adored Jane and Jane loved Thomas. She had made her feelings clear to Gilde, so even the slightest attraction to Thomas on Gilde’s part was a betrayal. Her body was responding to his handsome smile and tender words, but even though she was young, her brain told her to resist. And because of this Gilde didn’t want to hear anything else he had to say.

  “I think I’d like to go back to my seat now,” she said, tossing her head back and walking quickly.

  “You’re not angry, I hope?” he said a little too loudly. But she didn’t answer. She had already begun to walk away.

  CHAPTER 9

  Thomas

  After the night at the dance, Thomas began coming to see Jane at least two evenings a week. Jane was always giddy, ecstatic. She hummed or whistled as she made the bed in the morning. She giggled at the slightest thing. But most of all she talked about Thomas incessantly.Gilde listened, biting her lower lip, wanting to be a good friend. But in fact, she was worried about Jane. Gilde didn’t have the heart to tell Jane what Thomas had said at the dance. More than anything, Gilde wanted Jane to be happy. And because she knew the truth she knew it was only a matter of time before he broke Jane’s heart. All day while she was in class, Gilde would try to decide what to do. Would it be her fault if Jane got hurt for not telling Jane the truth? But how could she tell her? What could she say? Anything she said would hurt Jane.

  One night as the girls were getting ready for bed, Jane sat down and took Gilde’s hands. “I’ve made a decision..”

  Gilde sat on the bed beside her. “About what?”

  “I want to marry Thomas. He’s the one for me. I am sure of it,” Jane said.

  Gilde didn’t answer. Outside the sky opened up and a flood of rain fell upon the roof. The pounding of the rain overhead was in sync with the pounding of Gilde’s heart. A loud crash of thunder followed by lightning unnerved Gilde. She felt like God was telling her that lying to Jane was a sin.

  “I think he feels the same way about me, don’t you think so?”

  “I don’t know. I hope so,” Gilde lied. She knew how he felt, but she couldn’t get the words out.

  Gilde was distraught. But Thomas was not giving up, and every time Thomas came around, he made Gilde even more uncomfortable. He stole glances at Gilde when Jane turned her back. Once he smiled at Gilde and whispered “You’re so pretty.” When Jane was not in the room, Thomas was hard to resist. And all this attention towards Gilde from the most attractive and desirable boy in school was wearing down her resistance. The only thing she could do was try to stay away from him. But when she left the room, he would find a way to include her in whatever he and Jane were doing. If they were playi
ng cards, he’d insist that Jane invite Gilde. When they went out for a soda, he’d tell Jane to insist that Gilde join them.