Confessions After Dark

by Kahlen Aymes

  Alex paused as the implication of her words sank in. She knew.

  “Don’t you know where I am and who I’m with every second? You know I’m not seeing anyone, but if I were—it’s none of your business!”

  “Like hell, it isn’t!” he said. The words tore from him without his consent.

  It wasn’t possible to face him and still walk away. She should have known he wouldn’t accept defeat with grace. Not without a fight and here it fucking was.

  “It’s just the chase you love, Alex. What would happen if I stopped running? Would you still want me?” Her eyes challenged him.

  Alex didn’t speak for a few seconds and just stood there staring into her face. “That’s just it,” he said softly. “You weren’t running. We were together. I want to be again.”

  The blood drained from her face.

  “No. Just… No. This will never work.”

  “Why do you fight something that feels so fucking good? God, I’m so pissed at you I can’t stand it, but my cock is hard enough to pound nails! Do you think I’ll let you twist me all up in knots and then just walk away? I can’t. You. Want. Me, Angel.” He punctuated every word and each one was like a knife piercing her heart.

  She met his gaze without flinching, but her hand landed over her heart. “Yes… I do want. I want badly. Too much. And it does feel good. But, eventually, it will hurt like hell. I’m not willing to hurt like that. Happily ever after doesn’t start off this way, no matter how earth-shattering the physical connection is between us.”

  Alex had moved and was leaning up against the desk, half sitting on its edge with his arms crossed over his chest.

  “How do you know what will happen? You won’t give us a chance.” He looked at the ceiling and rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “It already hurts like hell, doesn’t it?” It wasn’t a question she wanted to answer, but the pain in his voice was as vivid as the anger. “I can’t even fucking believe I said that out loud,” he said in disgust.

  The words he said the night they made love in his apartment resonated in her head. “Oh, Angel. Jesus Christ, it hurts so fucking bad! It hurts… so fucking bad.”

  She could feel him behind her, even if he wasn’t touching her. “You told me the first time we spoke that sex was what mattered in relationships. Remember?”

  “I’m so sick of you reminding me of those words. I know what I said. Things change,” he said softly with a shrug of his shoulders. “We have to take a chance or we’ll never know, Angel. It’s like anything else. The risk is directly proportional to the payoff.”

  Her shoulders slumped, and her voice trembled. “This isn’t a damn boardroom, Alex. One of us will bleed out.” She knew who it would be because her heart was already aching over him. “You have to see it coming.”

  “At least I have the balls to try. I want you and no one else. I’m admitting it, Angel.”

  She sighed as her eyes closed tightly, feeling the fight drain from her body. If only that were true.

  When she didn’t answer, he rushed toward her and pushed her up against the glass window. Angel gasped in surprise as one of his large hands came to rest beside her head and his face stopped just inches from hers.

  “Tell me what is going to happen now. If you can read the future, then just tell me what you’re thinking.” His hand came up to cup her face, the thumb of his right hand pulling on her lower lip and his pelvis pressing into hers.

  “Alex, stop. You don’t fight fair.” She didn’t push him away because she didn’t have the strength. She inhaled his scent, his breath, and she craved his mouth on hers even though her mind screamed that they shouldn’t be in this place.

  “You don’t expect me to, do you?” Alex repeated the words she said to him that first night they went to dinner. “I always fight to win. But, I don’t want to fight right now.”

  “Then what do you want?”

  His nose brushed hers and he loomed over her, his green eyes burning into hers. “You already know. I want you to trust me and to let me take care of you, to make sure you’re safe. I want you to take my calls and let me take you out. I want to spend time with you. Just let it happen. That’s all.”

  “Spend time—fucking?” She knew it would piss him off and shatter the intimacy of the moment. She needed to do it or she would only get weaker.

  His handsome features hardened. “Stop saying that shit!” he said angrily, his grasp becoming more urgent. “Stop taunting me! You know what you’re doing when you’re doing it! You tease me until I can’t stand it, Angel. If sex was all I wanted, do you think I’d put myself through this?”

  “But…”

  In frustration, Alex interrupted her and he shoved her up against the glass yet again, this time with more force, making it impossible for her to move even if she wanted to.

  “Okay, yes! Do you want me to spill my goddamned guts? Is that what it will take? Then, yes!” he hissed, but never let her go, his lower body now pressing into hers and leaving her in no doubt he was as aroused as she was. “It’s indescribable! I’ve never been so consumed with desire. Is that what you want to hear? Then fucking hear it!”

  He pushed his hard length into the softness of her stomach, and Angel’s fingers fisted around the material on the front of his shirt, her resolve quickly melting into nothing. She closed her eyes and turned her face away.

  “Feel it. Yes! I want you, but you drive me crazy in a million other ways. I want to know you not just your body. I want to hear about your work, your family and friends, to sleep in your bed, and share meals with you. I want your voice calling my name in the dark. I want you to let me into your world, and for the first time in my life, I want to let someone into mine. And I don’t want secrets between us. Christ!” he ground out.

  The indescribable burn between them scorched them both. They were both furious as his body held hers in place, and they raged at each other with their words. Angel’s chest was heaving at the magnitude of what he was saying. Alex’s gaze dropped to her mouth and his thumb brushed against her cheek as she softened against his will. He ground his pelvis into the softness of her stomach again, and she gasped at the implication, her brown eyes challenging him fiercely, yet she was unable to speak.

  “I’m not going to be a hypocrite and lie about the want, Angel. Even if every cell in my body weren’t aching with it, you wouldn’t believe me even if I said it weren’t true.”

  “I know it is,” she breathed, and suddenly, the energy changed as his mouth bent toward hers and he took it gently, licking her top lip and urging a response by nudging it with his full lower one. Her breath was hot and rushed from her chest in anticipation, her scent intoxicating and exciting Alex further.

  He could feel her body relaxing as she gave into her own desire. Desire for him. The knowledge of it filled him with elation and something that went deeper. Control over her wasn’t what he required, but he needed to know that she was as helpless to this thing between them as he was.

  His hot breath rushed over her cheek as he bent to nuzzle against her skin, one hand starting to roam down her shoulder and collarbone and then ghosting over her breast, sliding down the side of her body, over her hip, and lifting one leg up. The fingers of her left hand curled into the front of his shirt and under it until they flattened on the hard muscles, curling in the stream of hair there, while her right slid over his shoulder to clutch into the hair at the back of his head.

  “Clearly,” he moaned as her hips surged into his, pressing his aching erection more firmly into the heat between her legs. He needed her to know how deeply he was affected because he wanted her to feel safe, to know he needed her, too, and that they were in this together. It was the only way she was going to open up, and he knew it. She whimpered softly into his mouth, and he loved it.

  “Uhh… Alex.”

  The sound of his name falling from her lips in passionate surrender urged him on. “Do you feel how on fire I am for you?”

  Her arms slid up over
the solid muscles of his chest, around his neck, and into his hair. When she did that, he lifted her like she weighed nothing, to press her higher up on the wall creating more of the friction they both needed. “I need to hear you say it.” His mouth hovered over her open one, refusing to kiss her until she admitted to the same need he had. “Tell me you want me, too.”

  “We can’t be in the same room without wanting to rip each other’s clothes off. It’s not healthy.” Her voice was breathless and her words broken. “God—you know I do.”

  “Mmmm…” His mouth took her lips roughly, passion and need filling them both. Angel opened her mouth to his invading tongue and clung to him as he pulled her closer because there was no thought of denying the raging need. They were both starving, the impact of the words they’d just exchanged feeding their desperation even more.

  She broke the kiss and twisted her head away leaving him to bury his mouth in the side of her neck.

  “It’s been too long.”

  “It’s like an obsession, Alex. It’s not real.”

  “I don’t care. Whatever it is… I want it.”

  His arms tightened and he lifted her up off of the floor, turning around toward the center of the room where the desk was situated. The computer and the soundboard prevented him from laying her down, so he perched her on the edge of the desk. Her legs came up of their own volation, wrapping around his, one heel digging into his muscled thigh. Alex’s hands closed around her lower back to pull her hips flush against his groin and it was heaven.

  Her head fell back and her mouth dropped open before it closed and her teeth emerged to bite her lower lip. She leaned back on one elbow and the other hand frantically pushed up the hem of his shirt, the hard muscles tightening as he sucked in his breath. She looked into his glowing eyes as he pulled her still tighter to his body, a low growl escaping his chest as another wave of lust flowed through him.

  “I can feel your heat coming through all of these layers,” he groaned, resting his forehead against her cheek before his mouth found hers in another hungry kiss. Their hips rocked into each other as they worked frantically at each other’s clothing, hands clawing, mouths seeking the delicious skin that was bared. The position on the edge of the desk was awkward, and Alex longed for a way to get her skin on his and fast.

  Panting, he pulled away from her and looked around for his discarded shirt on the floor. There was carpeting in the studio but it was low pile and rough. Angel watched in silent awe as his perfect body moved in front of her, laying the shirt out on the floor. The muscles on his back were so well-defined, his shoulders strong, and the biceps flexing in the shadowed light made her tremble.

  Why is he so beautiful? Why does he take my resolve? She lifted a shaking hand and pressed the back of her hand to her mouth.

  Angel made short work of her shirt as Alex undid the button and zipper on his jeans, exposing the grey boxer briefs he wore beneath, the strong column of his erection drawing her eyes, and she thrilled to see how affected he was. He fell to his knees in front of her where she was still sitting on the edge of the desk.

  “Alex, we should stop.” The words weren’t easy for her to say; stopping was the last thing she wanted. Her voice was soft, barely audible.

  He didn’t say anything, just reached out a hand and pulled her forward roughly by fisting his hand in the front waistband of her jeans. His eyes were wild as he made easy work of the closing, and Angel said nothing nor did she make a move to stop him.

  He pulled the material down her legs and let it drop the few inches from her feet to the floor. His hands closed around her thighs, kneading the silken flesh as he ran his mouth from the line of her neck up over her cheek, his tongue leaving a trail of fire behind it. His mouth opened over the skin of her shoulder and sucked hard, causing Angel to gasp, his teeth grazing her skin as his hands raked down her back.

  “I thought I could get you out of my system, but every time we’re finished, the ache comes back worse than before. You’re all I think about,” he whispered as his mouth moved to hover over hers, and Angel pushed off with her arm to sit up straighter, causing him to move back at the same time. The movement brought her torso in closer contact with his face, and she wound her arms around his head, her fingers tugging through his hair.

  “Oh, God.”

  Alex’s description had slammed through every synapse in her brain, and his whispered words were her very own thoughts. It was insane. It was indescribable and impossible. This insatiable longing was growing as if it had a life of its own, and she hated herself for not being able to resist. She hated that this one man’s touch could reduce her to such clinging desperation.

  Alex bent to kiss the luscious swell of her breast, visible over the sheer black lace of her bra, his fingers brushed across the crotch of her matching thong, and he moaned at the moistness he found there.

  “Your body tells me you want this as much as I do. This is going to happen and keep happening. Stop fighting it.”

  Angel writhed against him as Alex’s fingers closed around the lace and practically ripped it from her body as his lips crushed down on hers roughly. His hands moved up over her hips then her ribcage and around her back as he kissed her over and over. She clung to him, her mouth wild beneath his, as he quickly rid her of her bra. He was delirious as every inch of her skin was available for his eager hands.

  Angel whimpered when Alex pulled his mouth from hers to let it travel down her body. “Uhhh…” She sucked in her breath he when pulled her leg up until her foot rested on his shoulder and she felt his scruffy chin rubbing on the sensitive skin of her inner thigh. His breath was hot as he blew out his breath and then, deeply sucking in the scent of her arousal.

  She might have been embarrassed with Kenneth because sex with him had been awkward, but with Alex, it was a raw, animal need and neither of them could hide one damn thing from the other. He was intoxicated further. “Jesus… Angel, you don’t know what you do to me.”

  After that, there were no more words. His mouth drove her insane as he licked and suckled her heated flesh. Angel couldn’t stop the soft moans of pleasure bursting from her, and it drove Alex on even more. His hands pulled her hips forward to give him better access so he could thrust his tongue inside her. He loved the way she sounded, the way she tasted, his cock aching like it would burst, so jealous of his mouth.

  Looking down and seeing this beautiful man between her legs and getting into it so much had to be the sexiest thing she’d ever seen. He moaned deeply against her and sucked her flesh between his lips and flicked at it with the tip of his tongue. Her body tightened and clenched in response.

  “Uhhh… Alex…” His name fell from her lips in a rush of breath. “Aaaleeeeexxx!”

  A rush of satisfaction filled him. Wrapping his arms around her hips, he kissed her stomach and the underside of her breasts as she lay heaving in his arms.

  “Yes, Angel. God, you’re so beautiful when you come for me.”

  Her arms automatically wrapped around his broad shoulders, and he started to pull her from the desk, supporting her so she wouldn’t crash onto the floor, and moving her as if she weighed nothing. He laid her down on the shirt he’d put down earlier and kissed her mouth softly.

  “Mmmm… See how good you taste? I could do that every day and still want more, baby.” He sat up on his knees between her bent ones and pushed the top of his jeans and boxers down. She couldn’t help but reach for his cock as it sprang free, the silken steel hot as he twitched in her hand.

  “Your cock is so beautiful.” Her eyes ran up his body. It was perfection. “How many women have told you how beautiful you are?”

  “Only one that matters right now.” His hands ran over her knees and up her thighs as he bent to take a hard, pink nipple into his mouth. “Tell me what you want.”

  As he kissed her breasts, Angel heard the crinkling noise of the foil wrapper on a condom as he pulled it out of his pocket.

  “I want you inside me.” Alex kis
sed up her chest to her neck, over her chin and cheeks until he was looking into her eyes. “Without that.”

  “What?” He smiled softly and nuzzled her cheek again, throwing the packet aside. “I didn’t hear you.”

  He was going to make her beg.

  “You know you want to fuck me, Alex. Why must you make me beg?”

  “Because I’m so turned on I’m going to explode, and I need to know you’re just as fucked up by this as I am.”

  “Then do it,” she breathed. “Now! I want you, too.”

  “Ungggg…” Alex groaned as he rubbed the head of his cock along her wetness. Just a little push and he’d slip inside. Angel arched her back, raising her hips in invitation to show him what she wanted. “Nnn… baby. I want you sore tomorrow. Every delicious ache will be because of me and you’ll know it. You’ll think of me every time you move.”

  Angel gasped and bit her lower lip as he pushed in hard and started moving in long, hard thrusts. She closed her eyes and pulled him closer, wanting his mouth on hers, but Alex wanted to watch his body slide in and out of hers. It was the most erotic thing he ever experienced as he looked down on her and plunged inside over and over again. He held her right leg for leverage as his thumb moved to rub her sensitive, still-swollen nub. Her mouth fell open in audible pants, and she closed her eyes. Her hair was strewn out around her head like a dark halo, and her pale skin glowed in the half-light.

  He was lost. He knew it. For the first time in his life it was more than fucking, and if it ended, it would matter. He’d gotten a taste of her absence these past weeks, and he was determined to give her so much pleasure she’d be unable to deny what was between them. “Angel. Look at me.”

  Her eyes opened languidly and burned into his. “You feel so amazing. God, I’m… Uh, I’m going to come again.”

  “I’ll make you come a hundred times if you’ll let me.”

  He pounded into her harder, feeling his own orgasm build to the point of no return. When her back arched and her legs started to shake as she lost it, he fell on her body and kissed her deeply, his tongue thrusting into her mouth with the same intensity and rhythm as their mating bodies. Angel held onto him for dear life, taking him deeper and deeper, and needing to bring him more pleasure than anyone before her, she rocked her body into his and clenched around him. Even if this was all there was, if it was the last time, she needed to brand him like he was branding her.