My Only Regret (Twisted Fate Book 1)

by James, Rhonda

  “Are you ready for Sam to come get you? It’s almost time dear.”

  “I’m ready, just remembering the first time we did this. Cheryl, is it possible to love someone too much?” Our eyes made contact in the mirror, and her expression was soft and kind.

  “I don’t think so. Although, I will admit that when I look at Bill, even after all this time, I realize that I love him so much it hurts. I would do anything for that man. Oh, you’ll probably feel that way even more after your little one is born. Kids have a way of filling your heart with so much love that you think it’s literally going to burst open. But I don’t think you can love too much, if you feel that way it’s most likely because you’ve been given that same love in return.” She kissed me once more before turning to leave.

  “Do you think he’ll be happy being married to me for the rest of his life? Will we have the same happiness that you share with Bill? Or Tyler and Stefani? I’m scared that I can’t be everything he needs.”

  “My dear Rhyann, you two already have what you need. He loves you very much. You complete him, and he completes you. That is the happiness that I share with Bill, and Tyler with Stefani. Just be there for each other, through the good and bad, and everything will work out. And remember, we will all be here for you. You will always be our family. We love you,” she blew me a motherly kiss and strode gracefully down the hall. Not long after she left, Sam entered and held out an arm for me to hold.

  “You sure you want to do this darlin’?” he winked, playfully.

  “Without a doubt,” I smiled, broadly.

  "You know that man loves you more than anything else in this world. He's one lucky son of a bitch, and he knows it." Sam gave me a warm, brotherly hug and I fanned my face frantically trying to hold back the tears.

  "Let's just make sure he never forgets that." I jabbed him softly with my elbow. "Thanks, Sam. I love you." I gave his hand a squeeze and for a brief moment I saw his right eye glisten.

  "Thanks little momma, I love you too. Now, let's do this."

  The ceremony began promptly at three in the afternoon. Sam walked me down the aisle to a new song that Jesse had written for me called Three Little Words. I stood facing him as the last of the song played over the sound system.

  Do whatever it takes to prove to you

  No matter how much it hurts

  Cause I love you

  Oh baby, I love you

  I’ll spend the rest of my life repeating them

  Cause I know it’s the least you deserve

  I’m no longer afraid of those three little words

  I’m no longer afraid to say three little words

  “I love you baby,” Jesse mouthed to me.

  “Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today…” The Pastor moved forward with the ceremony, stopping only when it came time for us to say our vows.

  “I, Jesse, promise to honor and cherish only you. I promise to comfort you in times of need, and cry with you when you are sad. I promise to make you laugh, and try not to get mad when you are laughing at me. I promise to support you, and help you fulfill all of your dreams. I even promise to keep raw cookie dough in the fridge for monthly emergencies. I promise to always put you first, and to never go to bed angry. I promise to love you today, tomorrow, and always, till death do us part.”

  My heart swelled fully inside me, almost as if it were about to burst. I smiled as I thought about what Cheryl had shared with me. I looked in her direction and saw that she and Mel were both crying tears of joy. I held Jesse’s hands firmly, afraid that if I let go I might float away.

  “I, Rhyann, promise to honor and cherish only you. I promise to comfort you in times of need, and cry with you when you are sad. I promise to make you laugh, and try not to get mad when you are laughing at me. I promise to support you, and stand beside you as you live out your dream. I promise to watch scary movies with you, and always keep peanut butter in the house for midnight cravings. I promise to always put you first, and to never go to bed angry. I promise to love you today, tomorrow, and always, till death do us part.”

  “Jesse, you may kiss your beautiful bride.” Jesse grinned devilishly before dipping me back, planting an all-consuming kiss over my parted lips. Ever the performer, he put on quite a show for our family and friends to see. Oh boy, can my man kiss. The crowd erupted in applause and cat calls. He righted me and I fanned my face dramatically, blushing from the display of affection.

  “Aw baby, you’re so cute when you blush,” he winked.

  The weather held off and didn’t start raining until we were in the tent finishing up dinner. Throughout the evening we made our rounds, thanking everyone for coming. I was exhausted and ready for a nap. The last guest pulled away and Bill and Cheryl headed inside. Cheryl had instructed us to leave everything for the cleaning crew in the morning. We were alone at last. I sat down on Jesse’s lap and leaned my head against his shoulder.

  “My feet hurt,” I whined. “Take me home, husband.”

  “I’d like to do something first. Come with me,” he slipped an arm under my legs and stood with me in his arms. We walked outside and he carried me over to a large oak tree that held the tree house Bill had built for his boys. Jesse looked up at the tree and pointed. “I want to take you up there, but I’m not exactly sure how to do that in this dress.”

  “I’ve got an idea,” I said, turning and lifting my hair for him to unzip me. “I don’t need it anymore.”

  “I like your thinking Mrs. Montgomery,” he laughed wickedly and pulled down the zipper. I stepped out of my dress and shoes, placing them back under the tent. I stood there in my lacey bra and panties and let my husband get a good look. He gave me a cocky grin and held out a hand before motioning toward his back, telling me to “hop on.” He climbed the short distance to the base of the tree house and I scrambled off his back. He had decorated the small space with lots of roses and candles. He lit a few candles while I went to wait on the plush down comforter he had spread over an air mattress on the floor.

  “You’ve been busy,” I smiled.

  “You could say I had a vision. I wanted to spend a little time tonight with you up here. I have a lot of great memories as a kid in this space. I'm looking forward to sharing it with our kid." He leaned over and kissed my belly. “You are so beautiful.” He caressed my lips with his thumb and moved forward to kiss me. He nibbled at my lips, and his tongue made patient love to mine. I bowed up to him as he stroked a finger down my arm, making me shiver.

  “Are you cold?” he asked, concerned.

  “Just a little,” I snuggled closer to him. “In all of your planning you didn’t happen to pack me some yoga pants, did you?”

  “I did indeed,” he grinned, turning to grab a stack of clothes folded neatly behind him. I pulled them on quickly and settled in beneath him again. I planted delicate kisses over his face, not wanting this moment to end. He turned on his side to face me and reached over, tucking a loose tendril of hair behind my ear. His thumb stroked gently across my bottom lip and I nipped at it, catching the end of the digit between my teeth and holding it there, then kissing it softly before releasing it once more. I lay there in the arms of my beloved husband, a man who nearly three years ago had made love to me so perfectly that I had actually forgotten my own name, a man whose hazel eyes had captivated me right from the start. I stared into those same eyes and knew without a doubt that I trusted him more than anyone else in the world. He had earned that trust, and he deserved it. Hell, we both did. It was only when I allowed myself to trust him completely that I truly came alive. It was a hard road to travel but it was worth every ounce of pain I had gone through. I had finally found true love and nothing, or no one, would ever come between us again.

  “I have something to tell you,” I whispered, softly, “It’s about the baby.” I had gone to the obstetrician yesterday for my check up. Jesse had been unable to go because he had a meeting with his record label and their lawyers. While there, the doctor was able to tel
l me the sex of our unborn child. I had waited until after the ceremony to surprise him.

  “Is everything okay?” he asked, immediately concerned.

  “Yes, everything is perfect. It’s just that while I was there Dr. Matthews did an ultrasound; she was able to tell me the sex of our baby. Would you like to know?” I already knew the answer before posing the question. Jesse had proven to be a doting husband and father to be. The morning sickness had stopped after the first trimester, but that didn’t stop him from bringing me a cup of tea every morning before I got out of bed. It had been recommended by a friend of the family and was used specifically for nausea. I didn’t really like the taste, but I swallowed it down because the gesture was incredibly sweet. I’d come to accept that by the time I reached my third trimester I might actually forget how to walk due to Jesse carrying me everywhere we went. I vowed not to complain, I was just grateful to have him on this journey with me.

  He mock punched my arm before pulling me in tight against him. “Of course I want to know, what kind of question is that? Wait! I don’t know if I’m ready for this. Tell me there were ten fingers and toes. Tell me that everything looks healthy. That’s all that matters, right?” His eyes were tight with concern and it warmed my heart to know he loved us that much.

  “Ten fingers, ten toes, a perfect string of pearls that make up the spinal column. Babe, he’s perfect,” I whispered, giving him the answer, but he didn’t catch on.

  He squeezed his eyes shut and held onto my hand. “So, just answer this, will I be buying a drum kit or a Barbie for their fifth birthday?”

  “Gee, I don’t know, a drum kit could go either way,” I played coy, “but you definitely won’t be buying a Barbie, not unless it’s a Ken doll.” He squeezed both arms around me and I could feel his body trembling.

  “A son? You’re pregnant with my son?” Tears streamed down his perfect cheeks, showing me his soft side, reminding me again of why I'd fallen in love with him. “I’m going to have a son. I’m so happy. I mean, I would love a little girl too, but a son. Wow, thank you. I love you so much. You’re going to be a great mom.” He kissed me once and then brought his lips back to my belly. "I can't wait to meet you, my sweet baby boy."

  I laughed softly, letting my own tears of joy fall down my face. I loved knowing that our child was the reason for his joy, well, that and his undying love for me. “I get the feeling you’re going to be the best daddy ever.”

  “Well, I don’t know about the best, but I’ll definitely be the coolest. He’ll grow up hanging out in the studio, go on tour with us, and you know he’ll learn how to play every instrument there is.” His hand smoothed circles over the small bump that had started to form.

  “Of course he will, he’ll have his daddy and three amazing uncles to show him how it’s done.” I smiled, happily.

  “Yeah, you know Sam will have him sitting on a drum stool by the time he’s old enough to sit up on his own.” Jesse laughed and gazed longingly into my eyes. “A son. Oh, God, do you have any idea how much I love you?”

  A memory of the night we met flashed through my mind and I had to laugh at the irony. “The name’s Rhyann, but I’ve been called God and a few other names before.” I pulled him up to me, kissing him firmly on the lips as he hovered above me.

  “Haha, you think you're funny don’t you? I can think of something else I love calling you.” His lips brushed lightly over mine.

  "Oh yeah? What's that?" I asked, playfully.

  “Hi Mrs. Montgomery,” he winked, flashing me both dimples and reminding me of one more reason I couldn’t resist him.

  ‘Hi Mr. Montgomery.” I smiled, happily, knowing that my life was more than I'd ever dreamed it could be, knowing that the man I loved more than life itself loved me just as much, and content with the knowledge that the rest of my days would be spent falling asleep after we made love, and waking up in his strong arms. Any woman in her right mind wouldn't ask for more.

  No Regrets

  A companion to My Only Regret

  as told from Jesse's POV

  (Tentative release in October 2015)

  Copyright © 2015 Rhonda James

  All rights reserved.

  ISBN-10: 0692507175

  ISBN-13: 978-0692507179

  PROLOGUE

  "Sweetheart, I'm sorry, but this is where our night ends." I stated to the woman that currently occupied a portion of my bed. Well, not my bed exactly, but the bed that my brother and his wife graciously allow me to crash in. I glance to my left and take in the appearance of the brunette lying next to me. She looks sleepy, a little confused, and well-fucked.

  We'd met at a little bar about an hour out of town. My band, Twisted Fate, had been playing there and at some point during the last song I had looked out into the crowd and spotted her undressing me with her eyes. That wasn't new, it was one of the perks of the business. After the set she’d followed me backstage and after two rounds of sex, and multiple orgasms, here we were. My asking her to leave shouldn't have been news to her, I'd gone over the rules implicitly and the one about this being one night only had been reiterated multiple times. That's the way I work. I don't pretend to offer more than sex. I've been in a committed relationship before and it ended ugly. I vowed then and there to never allow myself to get attached. Sex is merely an act, one that I am very good at, and I really fucking enjoy it, but I never allow feelings to come into play. The only feelings I care about are how good it feels to have a full set of lips wrapped around my cock, or how great it feels slipping inside a woman that is so wet and ready you could get lost. Hell, I even enjoy the feelings I get when kissing a sexy woman, but I never allow those feelings to turn into anything more than pleasure. As soon as I feel she has been thoroughly pleasured, it's time to part ways. Hence, why we have reached this stage of the evening. This one can't walk away saying that I didn't attend to all of her needs. I’d made sure she would leave feeling more than satisfied, and maybe a little sore. Okay, maybe a whole lot sore, but only because she kept begging for more. It's not my fault that I'm a lot to take in.

  "What if I'm not ready to go?" She asked, in her most sultry voice. That same voice had me standing at attention a few hours ago, but now it just annoyed me. I hate clingy women, and this one won't stop rubbing her hands up and down my chest.

  I catch her by the wrist and put an end to the touching. It's not that I don't like it, I'm just ready for this dance to be over. It's been a long day, and night, and I need my sleep. I can't sleep with another woman in my bed, not since my split with my ex, Amber. The thought of her makes my heart squeeze just a fraction. For a brief moment, I allow myself to wonder what, or whom, she's doing right now. I shake my head, shutting down those thoughts as fast as they show up, and deal with the situation at hand.

  "As much as I appreciate the offer, sweetheart, I'm gonna have to pass. I need my sleep, which means you need to leave. I don't sleep with strange women in my bed."

  "That's funny, I wasn't a stranger thirty minutes ago when your face was between my thighs." She snaps, jumping out of bed to collect her clothes. Watching her stomp around my room naked is entertaining. She's got a great body, and she was a great lay, but that's beside the point. I stare, amused, as she hops on one leg to step back into her pants. I realize then that I can't remember her name. Lisa, Laney, or was it Leslie? Fuck, who cares? I just need her gone.

  "I didn't hear you complaining. Besides, you knew the rules when you followed me here. We both got what we wanted, end of story." I wave my hand at her, showing her the door. Her face falls when she realizes that I'm not even going to escort her out of the apartment. Hey, I'm aware that I'm a prick, it's not something I'm proud of, but certain circumstances have made me who I am today.

  "You're not even going to walk me out? You're a fucking asshole! I don't ever want to see you again!"

  "I don't foresee that being a problem, darlin'."

  "Prick," she mumbles, confirming my self-assessment, and slams the door on her
way out. By now I'm sure that Tyler and Stefani have heard every word because she sure as hell screeched at the top of her lungs. Hell, she'd screamed my name more than a few times as I was pounding into her so I was quite sure they'd heard more than the yelling match that had just taken place.

  I heard the door to the apartment bang shut and settled my head back against the pillow. I needed sleep, but, for reasons I will never understand, I found myself reflecting back to my failed relationship with Amber. It happened every time, without fail, after I'd been with another random stranger.