Regress (The Alliance Chronicles Book 1)

by SF Benson

  She faced me. “What did it cost you?”

  I lowered my head. “I had to get Intrepid.”

  Tru touched my cheek. “Something’s wrong. What’s up?”

  This girl knew me too well. I shrugged and parked my rear on the edge of the bed. “Malcolm wants me to meet with my father.”

  “No.” A scowl etched itself on her face. “It’s too risky.”

  “The Alliance has some demands before Intrepid goes live. I have to do it.”

  Tru sat next to me. She grabbed my hand and rubbed my bruised and bloodied knuckles. “What happened?”

  “You don’t want to know.”

  “Fine. It doesn’t matter.” She shook her head. “I have something to take care of.”

  I side glanced at her. “What?”

  She kissed me on the cheek. “It’s something I need Malcom to do.”

  “Malcolm?”

  “Yes,” she said quietly.

  “You’re not seeing him alone. I’ll go—”

  “No. You need to trust me. I need to make some things clear. He’s the only one who can do this for me.”

  I scrubbed a hand over my face. “It’s not you I’m worried about.”

  She squeezed my hand. “You don’t have to worry about him either.”

  “Tru?”

  “What?”

  “I thought we weren’t keeping secrets.”

  “No secrets. I’ll tell you later.”

  “Let’s face it people. We have a common enemy. The New Order oppresses. It exploits and discriminates all of us. We have to rise up and unite against this common threat to our way of living.”

  —Malcolm Rivera, leader, The Alliance

  Demanding Zared meet with his father was definitely not cool. I didn’t trust Katsuo Aoki nor Malcolm. They were both snakes with their own devious agendas. Neither man was above putting him in danger. The meeting felt like a trap. I refused to lose anyone else.

  Music from the Ice Pimp blasted my ears from the hall.

  Taking us out a little at a time,

  They’re finding a way to solve the issue.

  Step-by-step,

  The crisis we live with,

  The dangers we all face.

  Step-by-step,

  They’re erasing us from history.

  A rusty smell hit my nose as I stepped into the office. Malcolm, wearing a wife-beater, sat behind his desk with his eyes closed. His deep-set eyes were ringed with reddened skin. His nose looked a little off-center. It didn’t take a Cogent to figure out what happened. Malcolm most likely deserved the beating Zared delivered.

  Malcolm opened his eyes and turned off the music.

  “Do you miss it?”

  “You a fan?”

  “I can’t say I am.” I eased into the room. “I was talking about the image.”

  “It had its perks.” He cleared his throat. “You see Aoki?”

  “Yes, thank you. This isn’t about him, though.”

  Malcolm shifted in his seat. “I’m intrigued.”

  I perched on the edge of the chair. “I need something, and you’re the one who can get it done.”

  His eyebrows rose.

  “You know Eden and her aunt killed my mom?” My vision clouded with the memory of the sound of the pistol. I tugged at my ear trying to forget the echoing blast.

  “I heard, and you want some payback.”

  I cocked my head. “Will you do it?”

  His cold eyes sparked. “So you believe the hype?”

  I crossed my legs. “I believe you will take care of anyone who crosses you.”

  “Eden and her aunt didn’t cross me.”

  “No, but they crossed someone in your family. Zared is part of that family. He’s my family now.”

  “Is that a fact?” His mouth twitched, sending chills up my spine. “I like you, Miss Shepard. You’re bold. I didn’t expect it from you, but I like it.”

  I squared my shoulders. No way would I let this conversation get out of control. “It’s like what you said in your music—the situation made you—same goes for me.”

  He lifted an eyebrow. “I thought you weren’t a fan.”

  “Let’s just say Creatives need to stick together.”

  He bopped his head and twisted his lips. “I hear ya. Anything else?”

  “Yes.” I rose from my seat. No time for second thoughts. “Train me. I’m willing to do whatever is needed to become an operative.”

  He grinned. “I don’t think your boy will like that.”

  I leaned over the desk. “Get it straight, Malcolm. Zared is my boyfriend, not a boy.”

  The Ice Cold Pimp steepled his fingertips. His eyes slowly probed my body. I shivered. The man had a way of making me feel naked just by looking at me.

  “I think you’ll agree my being an operative is better for everyone.”

  Malcolm licked his lips. “How so?”

  “We’re stronger together. We’ll both be focused on the mission. He won’t have to worry about me if I’m trained. I’ll be accountable for my own actions.”

  He laughed and clapped his hands. “Let me get this meeting between him and his old man done. I’ll make sure you’re trained. You just might be the best weapon the Alliance ever had. Beauty, brains, and guts. Damn, I can’t wait.”

  “About that meeting—”

  “Not up for negotiation,” he said curtly.

  I nodded and walked to the door. No. Zared wouldn’t like me being a part of the Alliance. But I needed someone with authority and the means to carry out my vengeance. Although I turned to Malcolm for help, I would not be in his debt.

  I faced him. “Malcolm, I won’t be a weapon. Weapons get used. Nobody uses me. Get used, get played.”

  Malcolm crossed the room. The man towered over me. I leaned back and looked up. He grabbed the back of my head and yanked me toward him. His lips were rough and cold, the kiss heartless. My heart pounded and I froze. I underestimated the bastard.

  He pulled away from me. “Don’t get it twisted. I’ll help you, but I always have a price. And if I want you as a weapon, you’ll be a weapon. Remember that.”

  I wiped my mouth. He didn’t know the old naïve me no longer existed. “And don’t underestimate me. I will not be used.”

  “Violence can masquerade as intelligence when you’re provoked.”

  —Malcolm Rivera, leader, The Alliance

  I hurried to Zared’s room. He would be on edge worrying about me. He had no need for concern, though. I wouldn’t become one of Malcolm’s trophies. But what would I tell him about the meeting? If I told him about the stolen kiss, Zared would kill him. The death of someone, no matter how despicable, should not plague anyone’s mind. I wouldn’t do that to Zared.

  I opened the door and found him pacing. He stopped and stared at me. Right then, it hit me. We were alone. No cameras. No microphones. No one to disturb us. Maybe it was a good thing. Or not.

  “Z, stop worrying.” I turned the lock and waltzed across the floor. “Rappers aren’t my type.”

  He exhaled. “I’m sorry. Was I that obvious?”

  “Yes.”

  “What’s got you smiling?”

  I looked around the room and winked. “No surveillance.”

  A slow and sexy smile crossed his face. Zared gazed at me. He lingered on my mouth for a moment, licked his lips, and then his eyes dropped to my breasts.

  “What should we do without an audience?” He arched a sly eyebrow.

  What I wanted and what I needed were two vastly different things. My mind needed a reprieve from this fist-shaking grief. My body needed to feel something other than pain. My empty soul joined the party with its request to be filled.

  “I think we can come up with something.” I bit my lower lip. “That is, if you’re prepared.”

  He delicately stroked my neck. I shuddered. “Oh, I’m more than prepared this time.”

  Maybe I’d forget everything I’d been through. Should I tell him first? A
fter all, we said no secrets. “Z, I need—”

  He caressed my cheek. “We can talk later.”

  “But—”

  “Shhh.” Z traced my lower lip with his finger. “Stop talking so I can kiss you.”

  He pushed his fingers through my hair and slightly pulled me to him. He kissed my lips, slowly with short kisses. Zared sucked my lower lip between his, and I sighed. My lips parted, and his tongue slipped inside. I loved the way he kissed. Our tongues stroked each other like paint caressing the canvas of a great masterpiece. Deeper and deeper, but oh, so gentle. I wanted it to last forever.

  Zared pulled back and looked into my eyes—a hint of mischief danced in his. He pulled me close again, kissing my cheek and working his way down my neck. When his hot breath danced across my skin my knees weakened, and I clung to his shirt. He embraced me tighter as I pressed my body to his.

  My stomach rolled. This was really happening. I wished I were brave, experienced. Surely, he had been with girls better than me.

  He found my mouth again. His luscious lips crushed mine, leaving me gasping. I moaned and glided my hand gingerly down his muscular back. Zared’s strong arms lifted me without breaking the kiss. We didn’t lose contact until my back hit the bed. My heart raced. What if I sucked at this? I let out a shaky breath.

  “You okay?”

  I was speechless. My quaking body only permitted a quick nod.

  “Relax, babe. We’ll take it slow.”

  I closed my eyes as he lowered himself on top of me. Zared rained kisses on my neck, the curve of my collarbone. His warm, rough hands slid beneath my T-shirt. I grabbed his hand and twisted from underneath him.

  “Wait,” I whispered.

  It wasn’t a control issue. I just wanted to be involved and not simply lying there. I straddled him, pulled off my shirt, and threw it to the floor.

  Zared reached up to stop me before I removed my bra. He draped his arms around me and kissed my shoulder, slipping the strap down. I shuddered as he flipped me under him. My exposed skin tingled as he kissed, then licked a path down to my navel.

  I bit my lip, silencing another moan. Zared’s hand lingered at my waistband. Carefully, he undid the button and zipper. I lifted my hips, allowing him to tug off my pants. He stopped at my panties, fingering them momentarily, and then eased off the undergarment. Then, he sat back and gazed at me with so much intensity I squirmed. I hoped I wouldn’t disappoint him.

  “You. Are. Beautiful,” he said quietly and touched my breasts.

  “Oh.” No one had ever called me beautiful before. Pretty, but not beautiful.

  Zared yanked off his T-shirt and jeans. I gasped. My fingers yearned to trace every inch of his chiseled chest and abs. He reached for a condom from the nightstand drawer, rolled it on, and lay on top of me. “You’re sure?”

  “Yes,” I said. Not really, but that would remain my little secret. My muscles quivered while my heart raced.

  I winced when he entered me. And, for a few blissful moments, I forgot about all the pain in my life.

  Zared fell asleep, and I slipped out of bed. I put on his T-shirt and went to the chair in front of the window. We shared something amazing, but it didn’t erase the sorrow. It weighed on my heart like an awful unhealed abscess. Damn, couldn’t someone lance the thing and let me be done with it? My throat ached from unshed tears. I pulled my legs up to my chest and hugged my knees. Deep down, remained a shred of strength amongst my shattered pieces.

  “Tru?” His question was full of worry.

  I plastered a smile on my face. No need to upset him. “Hey handsome, you’re awake.”

  Zared scrutinized me. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing.”

  He sat up. “Thought we were done with secrets.”

  I sat next to him and clenched my fists, trying to calm the shaking. “Just promise you won’t leave me.”

  “That’s an easy one.” He put his arms around me. “Y’know I’m not…Tru, you’re shaking. Tell me what’s wrong.”

  I sighed, deeply. God, it hurt. It hurt badly. I clutched my stomach. I had to tell him. “My mother…she’s…she’s dead.”

  “No. What—”

  “Eden. I—I saw the whole thing,” my voice cracked.

  Z tried to pull me closer.

  I pushed him away and stood.

  “Tru, I’m so sorry.”

  I shrugged. Why do people say “I’m sorry” when someone dies? It doesn’t change the situation. The person is still dead.

  “It’s fine.” I returned to the chair. “I mean, I’m okay. Everything will be okay.”

  Zared knelt before me. He stroked my arm. “Tru, you’re not okay.” He gathered me in his arms. “I promise you, babe. We’ll get through this together. I’m here for you.”

  I let him hold me. I needed it, but I didn’t want to think about my mother anymore. “So,” I cleared my throat, “when’s your meeting with your father?”

  “Uh, I was told in a few days. Tru—”

  “Good.” I pulled away from him and returned to the view outside the window. A couple of squirrels played in the yard. Did animals experience grief?

  “Tru, come away with me.” Zared startled me. He was still on his knees.

  “What did you say?”

  “Once I meet with my father and turn over Intrepid, as far as I’m concerned, I’ve completed my mission. The meeting will be in Canada. When it’s over, let’s stay there. Start fresh. Just the two of us. Have a normal life together.”

  I forced a smile. “That sounds tempting, but you know we can’t do that. The Alliance needs our help. We have to stop your father and the New Order.”

  Zared ran a hand through his hair and stood. “Is that why you went to see Malcolm? What did he tell you?”

  “He didn’t tell me anything,” I said flatly. “I volunteered. Ko recruited me last night. Both of them are right. We can’t ever have a normal life under the New Order.”

  “No, Tru. I don’t want you risking your life for them.” He tugged on his jeans, grabbed a shirt out of a drawer, and shoved his feet in his boots.

  “Where are you going?”

  “To see Malcolm. Y’know he’s not getting away with this.”

  “Stop, Zared. It’s not his decision and it’s not yours. I’m a big girl. This is all me. Please just give me your support.”

  “I want to know what deal you made with Malcolm.” His brow wrinkled.

  I crossed the room and stood in front of him. “He’ll make sure Eden and her aunt pay for killing my mother.”

  Zared shook his head. “There’ll be a—”

  “I don’t care what the price is.” I’d pay anything to get rid of the pain. And no one had better get in my way.

  “Faster than the speed of sound,

  And where’s the payback?

  This is for all of us, the Hybrids amongst us.

  The ones in the streets, no job, no life.

  They tried to keep us out.

  We’re not the minority, but the majority.”

  —from A Hybrid’s Perception by Ice Pimp, rapper, 2022

  I didn’t want Zared to have anything to do with it. The Alliance, however, insisted on a meeting between him and his father at a training site in Windsor. It was a last-ditch effort to get Katsuo to cease his experiments. The Alliance also wanted him to resign from the CHA and destroy his research. Intrepid was supposed to be the bargaining chip.

  Asher and Ko were standing on the safe house’s back porch. I had the feeling we were interrupting something important.

  Ko reached for my arm and then withdrew it. “Can we talk for a minute?”

  I shrugged half-heartedly. If she wanted to talk, I’d let her talk. I followed Ko inside.

  “Guys can you excuse us for a minute?” A soldier stood in the living room. Ko nodded toward the door and he left the room.

  “What’s going on?” I asked her.

  She took in a deep breath. “I just want to make sure yo
u’re okay.”

  “I am. Thanks for asking.” My voice was monotone, more civil than friendly.

  Ko’s brow wrinkled. “I got word from Malcolm about you becoming an operative. You know you don’t have to do it, right?”

  “I know. I chose to join. Will Asher still be training me?”

  “Sure, if that’s what you want. What does Zared think about it?”

  I sighed. “He doesn’t like it. He wants us to stay in Canada and start a new life together.”

  She twisted a ring on her finger. “That’s not a bad idea.”

  “Won’t happen. We’re needed by the Alliance.”

  “I’m making the recommendation for you to take a week off. Get away for a minute.”

  I stared at her. My friend didn’t know how to back off. She thought by saying the right words I’d be fixed, but this wasn’t fixable. My entire family was gone. A vacation wouldn’t solve it.

  “I want you to deal with all the changes in your life. Come back ready to work.”

  I rolled my eyes. She just didn’t get it. Never would. “Whatever.”

  We rejoined the guys outside. Ko sat next to Asher. I chose the chair closest to Zared.

  “Zared, do you have the card?” She asked.

  “I have it.” He pulled it out of his jean pocket and gave it to Asher.

  “Asher, if anything goes wrong, you’re to give the order to upload it to the Ubernet. Zared, the whole point of the meeting is to try to get your father to step down from the CHA, and he can’t conduct any more experiments. The Alliance wants his research destroyed.”

  “And if he, uh, refuses?”

  “You tell him we’re going live with Intrepid,” she said.

  “So, if he agrees, what happens to Intrepid?” I asked.

  “Oh, Intrepid goes live regardless. It’s just the timing of it. If he agrees, then the Alliance will wait for his research to be destroyed. He’ll get five days before Intrepid goes live. If he disagrees, it’s an immediate response.”