To Love and Honor

by Irene Brand

  “My mother said the same thing, but she also said that if I had to know to contact you, for she had buried her past and didn’t want to resurrect it. Aunt Ruth would never tell me anything about my father’s family—her answer was the same, ‘You’re better off not to know.’ After my introduction to the Conleys yesterday, I’ve decided she may be right.”

  He laughed shortly. “Yes, I saw you on the late news last night, standing beside the Old Man himself.”

  “Are you saying that reception was televised?”

  “Of course! Josiah is trying to elect a man to the presidency of the United States, so he can meddle in national political affairs as he’s done here in Kansas. He probably had several networks present.”

  “Oh, dear, I hope nobody in Maitland saw it.”

  “I was watching a local station, but it may have gone nationwide—usually does when a man announces as a presidential candidate.”

  “It’s too late now for me to worry about my own personal exposure to the media, I suppose, but I didn’t have a pleasant time yesterday. I went to his house expecting a short interview with my grandfather, and he wouldn’t allow me to leave. When he was busy elsewhere, I slipped out of the house and transferred from the hotel where I’d been staying to another. I only hope that I can get out of town before he learns where I’m staying.”

  “So you now know the real Josiah Conley—he’s domineering. That’s why his sons didn’t amount to anything, and that grandson, Mike, seems to have suffered the same fate.”

  “But what about my grandmother, Rachel? Josiah said that she was a wonderful woman, indicating that I looked just like her.”

  O’Brien nodded. “That’s true. I noticed the likeness on television last night, and the resemblance is even more remarkable in person. She was a good woman, but I think living with Josiah undoubtedly shortened her life. She’s been dead for years.”

  “When he saw how much I looked like her, he immediately told me that he wanted me to come and live in his home, marry and have children to carry on his name.”

  “So, now he’s decided that you’re his granddaughter, has he?”

  “What do you mean?” Her violet eyes flashed despairingly as she stared at the lawyer.

  “He went to a lot of trouble at your mother’s trial to prove that the only reason his son would have abused you or Linda was because you were illegitimate.”

  Violet gasped. “Surely that isn’t true?”

  “No, of course not. But you see, as Ryan Conley’s daughter, you would have inherited his estate, which was a considerable share of Conley holdings. He had no will, so therefore you would have gotten it. Josiah wasn’t about to lose control of a third of his wealth, and somehow he manipulated the court into declaring you illegitimate. There wasn’t much emphasis on DNA testing then, and besides, Linda just gave up. She decided that to continue to fight them would make it harder for you, but if she went to prison and out of your life, Ruth could give you a good upbringing.”

  “So that’s the reason for much of the secrecy—no one wanted me to know that there was a question about my legitimacy.”

  “Believe me, there was never any question that you are illegitimate—that was just a falsehood perpetrated by Josiah to serve his ends at the time. Now it’s in his interest to recognize you, so last night he introduced you to the world as his granddaughter. But this is one of the sordid questions that may surface if you do authorize the TV program, and be assured that Josiah will fight you all the way.”

  “Is he big enough to take on a national television network?”

  “He thinks he is.”

  Violet stood up and paced the room for a few minutes, stopping to look out the windows where a black-and-white cat walked stealthily across the greening lawn that still sparkled with dew. The telephone rang shrilly, and Violet’s pulse raced, but the ringing stopped abruptly as Mrs. O’Brien apparently answered in the house.

  “Up until the past six months I lived a fairly peaceful existence, but since last October, I seem to jump from one battleground to another, so I suppose one more fight won’t devastate me. I have to know the facts before I can make a judgment on the television show. Where do we start?”

  “It will take a couple of days for you to review the material I’ve accumulated. I have a complete legal portfolio of my trial defense, as well as copies of newspaper reports of the proceedings. I don’t do that for all of my court cases, but this situation was such a travesty of justice that I felt constrained to keep a record of everything that happened. You may see any or all of this that you want. But, first, let’s go over to the house so you can meet Fanny and have lunch.”

  Fanny O’Brien was possessed of a lean, energetic body. Whereas William moved with a deliberate step, Fanny seemed in perpetual motion, as if she never stopped to rest. Still, she had a soft manner and her gracious welcome made Violet feel at home. Tears filled her green eyes as she drew Violet into a warm hug.

  “My dear, I’ve prayed often that you would be able to overcome your traumatic past, and it seems that you have.” She settled Violet into a comfortable chair, and made no further mention of Violet’s reason for being in Kansas City.

  While they ate the lunch of cheese-and-broccoli soup, hearty bread, vanilla yogurt and cookies, Fanny and William discussed their family. Violet was invited to view the pictures of their four wonderful grandchildren, and she calculated how many years it would be before Jason and Misty might bear some children. She could become a grandmother before she was thirty—it was an unsettling thought.

  They didn’t tarry in the house after lunch because O’Brien indicated that it would take several hours to read the court records concerning the trial. As they walked down the long hallway to his office, the lawyer said, “Your father abused your mother physically and emotionally, and as long as he vented his emotions only on her, she submitted. She felt trapped I supposed, as women often do in such circumstances. He also threatened to take you away from her if she ever tried to leave him. She knew that with his wealth, he could do it, too. It was when he also threatened you that she rebelled.”

  “This is terrible,” Violet moaned as they settled around a table in O’Brien’s law library. “My heart has gone out to victims of domestic violence that I’ve seen in the news, but I can hardly stand to believe that my mother and I were treated in such a manner.”

  “As I understand he never actually hurt you until the night Linda shot him, but he kept a loaded gun handy and sometimes threatened both of you with it. That fatal night, he picked you up and appeared about to hurt you. She grabbed the gun and pleaded with him to leave you alone. They struggled and when the gun went off by accident, he was shot.”

  Violet sighed deeply, unable to speak. “I’m glad I was too young to remember it,” she said finally.

  “I did the best I could at the trial, proving that she acted in self-defense, but I’ll have to admit that Josiah Conley outmaneuvered me. He had a bevy of high-powered lawyers, and I just couldn’t compete with them. And when Linda wouldn’t even testify in her own defense, I just couldn’t get her acquitted.”

  All of her life Violet had wondered why her mother hadn’t loved her, but the more she heard, the more she realized that Linda’s every action of the past was motivated by overwhelming love for her daughter. Why did her mother have to die before Violet realized the extent of that love?

  After four hours of reading the court proceedings, Violet knew the whole story—how her mother had been portrayed as a woman of questionable character, even mentally unstable, and her father shown to be an admirable man, perhaps even defending himself from a violent wife.

  The trial had indeed been a travesty of justice, but did she want all of this aired to the nation on Peter Pierce’s show? She dropped her head to her hands when she laid aside the last paper.

  Her voice muffled in her hands, she said, “Everyone was right. I shouldn’t have delved into the past. Now, I’ll have to live with the knowledge that I had a be
ast for a father, and that my grandfather conspired to send my mother to prison.”

  “Linda said that Ryan wasn’t difficult at first, but when they came to live here in Kansas City, he began to drink heavily and their marriage became a disaster.”

  Compassionately, O’Brien said, “Why not stay with us tonight? You will need to come tomorrow and read the newspapers anyway. We would be pleased to have you. I don’t like for you to be alone.”

  “Thank you, but if you’ll telephone for a taxi, I’ll go back to the hotel. I know how to find your office now—I’ll drive out tomorrow.”

  Violet did appreciate O’Brien’s offer, but all she wanted now was Roger. She had to telephone him as soon as she could, to hear his kind voice, and know, by the soft inflection of his words, that he loved her—even over the phone, Roger’s voice conveyed a caress.

  She hurriedly dialed his number as soon as she reached her hotel room. Jason answered, saying his father hadn’t come home yet. So she waited almost an hour, with her hand on the phone, before he finally called.

  “Oh, Roger, it’s good to talk to you.”

  “You sound upset,” he said. “Are you all right?”

  “No—I’ve had a terrible day finding out about my father’s death and my mother’s trial. And after that day with my grandfather yesterday, I’ve about had it.”

  “Have you made up your mind about what you intend to do about all these new developments?”

  “No, I’m too upset to even think. Roger…” she paused, tapping her fingers on the table. “Roger, I probably shouldn’t even ask this, but could you come here? If you will come by plane, I’ll pay for the ticket. I know I shouldn’t unload all of my troubles on you, but I just don’t know what to do. If you could be with me when I give my grandfather an answer, and if you could talk to Mr. O’Brien, it would be such a help to me.”

  There was a long silence, and Violet held her breath. Surely he wouldn’t refuse when she needed him so desperately.

  “I’m sorry, Violet. You’re on your own with this one. It’s one situation where you must make decisions without me. There’s a lot at stake for you, and I don’t want to sway your judgment with my opinions. I won’t come, but I’ll support any decision you make. I hope you understand.”

  “I understand perfectly,” Violet said, biting her lips to control her voice. “I’m sorry I asked you. Goodbye.” When she replaced the receiver, Violet felt as if she had cut the lifeline on her last vestige of hope. After he had promised that he would always be available when she needed him, Roger had failed her. She couldn’t believe she had heard him correctly, and she kept thinking he would return her call to say he would come to her after all, but the phone didn’t ring.

  Violet undressed and lay upon the bed, although she didn’t expect to sleep. Once she thought of telephoning Pastor Tom, but what could he do for her now? As she stared dry-eyed at the ceiling, Violet remembered Jesus’s words from the cross, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” It must have been an anguished cry for already his friends had betrayed, denied and deserted him, but the ultimate despair came at that moment when He feared that God, too, had deserted Him.

  Strangely enough, even though Roger had repudiated her, she didn’t feel forsaken by God, and it gave her the strength to go on. She didn’t want to return to Maitland, didn’t think she could possibly face Roger, but what else could she do? Her home and her job were there, as were her friends. She could eventually go back to Minnesota and live near Aunt Ruth, who would be glad to have her, and that might be a good move.

  For the time being, at least, she would have to return to Maitland to make the decisions that loomed ahead—how to evade her grandfather’s clutches and whether or not to approve the documentary on her mother’s trial. Roger wouldn’t help her make those decisions, but her faith was strong that God would. God had never said that his followers would be exempt from problems, although He promised His presence in the midst of trouble.

  She thought of the many times in the Bible when He had brought others from the depth of despair and made them viable people again. Probably David was one of the best biblical examples to prove that God’s people were not exempt from trouble. Although expressly chosen by God to lead the Hebrew nation, his father-in-law had plotted his death, his sons had disappointed him, one had even aspired to usurp his father and the Hebrew king lost some of his sons by death. Yet David had praised God even in the midst of his trials. She remembered his words, “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

  Those words described Violet’s condition. Her soul was disturbed, but today’s happenings had brought her to the place where she recognized that her only hope was in God. Roger was human, so it was natural that he would disappoint and fail her. Larry had hurt her by his rejection. Her mother and father had left her a nasty, devastating and scandalous heritage. Only God had the power to sustain her. And although she knew some momentous decisions awaited her on the morrow, her heart was at peace and she was able to sleep when she remembered other words of the Psalmist, believing that what God had done for David, He would do for her: “I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.”

  After she showered and dressed the next morning, Violet went downstairs to the restaurant for breakfast. Although she hadn’t eaten since her lunch with the O’Briens yesterday, she had little appetite, but she ordered coffee, toast and oatmeal. She didn’t believe today’s revelations could possibly be worse than what she had endured yesterday, but whatever she faced, she knew better than to tackle it on an empty stomach.

  As she walked across the lobby after eating, the clerk called, “You had a telephone call while you were out of your room. I didn’t know you were in the restaurant or I could have paged you.” He handed her a sheet of paper, on which he had written, “Return the call of Josiah Conley.”

  So he had traced her. She should has suspected that.

  Coming to a quick decision, she said to the clerk, “I’ll be checking out of the hotel this morning. I had intended to stay until tomorrow, but I believe I can finish my work and leave today.”

  She hurriedly packed her bags. Now that her grandfather had found out where she was, he might very well come to the hotel when she didn’t return his call. She absolutely couldn’t talk to the man until she had time to assimilate what she had learned in the past few days. If she approved the documentary on her mother’s trial, her grandfather would be very unhappy, and she had decided that she must think and pray more before she came to a decision. As soon as she finished with O’Brien, she would head toward Maitland. Today was Friday, and she could be home by Saturday evening, which would give her some time of preparation before returning to school on Monday.

  “Has something else happened?” O’Brien asked immediately upon seeing Violet, and she surmised that her demeanor must appear even worse than yesterday.

  “Well, yes, you could say that,” she said bitterly. “I telephoned my fiancé last night, and he was reluctant to talk to me. When I asked him to come here to talk with you about the trial, and to go with me to talk with my grandfather, he told me I would have to handle this one by myself.”

  Violet paused, and her thoughts were bitter, but she was tearless and resigned to doing without Roger. She really couldn’t blame him for turning her down; she had burdened him with her problems so much the past few months. Perhaps he thought it was time for her to act more independently. But that still didn’t prevent her from feeling dejected.

  “He probably knows more about Josiah Conley than you do.”

  “Quite possibly, for I didn’t know anything until Tuesday. Then this morning, I had a telephone call from my grandfather at the hotel, but I wasn’t in my room to receive the call. I’d changed hotels to prevent his tracing me, but he did. As soon as I finish here, I’m leaving town. I can’t encounter him again. I’m afraid of him.”

  “And so you sho
uld be. Very few people have ever confronted Josiah Conley and come out the victor. I hope you don’t think I’m just prejudiced against the man. I have proof of my allegations. He has a thirst for power, and whom he can’t control, he destroys.”

  “So does that mean he will destroy me if I don’t do what he wants?”

  “Perhaps, but if you do what he wants, you’ll also be destroyed. You have a better chance of survival if you stay away from him. It’s too bad you had the misfortune to have Josiah Conley for your grandfather.”

  “I’ve wondered why my mother ever married into the Conley family. Surely, she must have known what they were like.”

  “Remember, she didn’t live in Kansas City. She met your father in Topeka, where he was managing a branch of Midwest Enterprises. He was a handsome man, with a lot of charisma, and she didn’t consider his family when she fell in love with him. I believe Ryan wanted her because she was mild-tempered and went along with everything he wanted. He’d had enough domination all of his life, and Linda’s quiet ways salved his ego. They were happy, at first, until Josiah called them back to Kansas City—that’s when the trouble started.”

  “I’ll spend the morning reading old newspapers, and then I’m going home, although I suppose I won’t even be safe there.”

  “Didn’t you say your fiancé is a policeman? He can protect you.”

  Violet grimaced. “Don’t forget, he may not want to be my fiancé now?”

  She didn’t learn much more from the newspapers than she already knew, and by early afternoon, O’Brien took her into his private office for a consultation. His secretary was working today, and their conversations were guarded.

  “So now you know,” he said.

  “Yes, and I’m not sure I’m any better off, but I do know. Now what do I do with my knowledge?”

  “That is your decision.”

  “You don’t know how weary I’ve become of hearing those words the past few months,” Violet said.