Mudpoo and the Fungus Mystery

by Peter Klein

  That night Captain Pete sat up late playing the guitar and the little boobook owl sat near his window doing his little ‘mo-poke, mo-poke’ call. Whilst Captain Pete was tuning his guitar, he discovered something extraordinary; the little owl’s hoot was in the key of B-flat!

  “That’s it, I’ve got it! We can scare rabbits away if we play music in B-flat, I’m sure that this will work!” he cried out aloud.

  Captain Pete was so excited he found it difficult to get to sleep. He dreamt about his new invention whilst listening to the owl’s haunting ‘mo-poke, mo-poke’ calls. His calls that night were louder than usual. Hooty the boobook owl was hooting a warning to all his owl friends that something wasn’t quite right in the nearby hills. It seemed to the little owl, that things might get worse; he could sense there was DANGER in the air!

  There was a rumbling, spluttering sound coming up from Kurrajong Gap Road near Bethanga. An old bush-bashing truck (made from left over bits and pieces of other trucks) was struggling up the hill towards the Bethanga Lookout. None of its four occupants were happy. Squished in the front cabin, like sardines, were Snot, Grot, Bones and Pong; the once fierce pirates. (They had a fright on the high seas and had decided a career change would be good. They were running a flower shop in Queensland until they got into a spot of bother and swapped their flower shop for a truck, loaded with poisonous chemicals.)

  “How was I supposed to know we were selling a noxious weed,” grunted Snot.

  “It’s called Riverina Bluebell,” said Grot, “and I really liked it.”

  “Yeah but we delivered hundreds of bunches to weddings,” muttered Pong.

  “They said it was called Paterson’s curse,” snarled Bones, “and they all wanted their money back!”

  “Yeah well I reckon it was a stroke of luck we met that Fungus McPhee fellow. He said he had an old gold mine in Bethanga and if we shut up about it he would allow us to help him out with a special job,” mumbled Snot.

  “As long as we get some GOLD!” whispered Pong fiercely and the others nodded eagerly in agreement.

  “Well I reckon these toxic chemicals will be handy for something, it’ll be just like the old days,” snarled Bones.

  The truck’s cabin was very hot and dusty and the pirates were tired from their long trip. They arrived at Bethanga just in the nick of time. Right out front of the Bethanga General Store the radiator exploded, leaving a gurgling trail of steam and smoke going in all directions.

  “Can I help you gentlemen?” asked Richard the storekeeper, politely.

  “Yeah, we’d like a box of carrots and a mechanic,” jeered Bones, who was in a really bad mood.

  “What are the carrots for?” asked Snot.

  “You’ll see,” replied Bones grumpily.

  “And directions to the old GOLD mine please,” said a tired Grot, absentmindedly. The others glared, giving him three icy stares.

  “Shut up you idiot, it’s supposed to be a secret,” hissed Bones.

  “Well, it’s right up there on the top of the hill, just follow the road around to the lookout and keep going. No one has been up there for years,” replied Richard, surprised. “Here are your carrots.”

  Mick, the local mechanic (who could fix just about anything), arrived and scratched his head. “I haven’t seen an old truck like this since I was an apprentice!” he said in disbelief.

  Bones complained that the radiator was broken and the engine was running a bit rough.

  “Lucky for you, I’ve got a special fuel mix that should see you right,” Mick boasted, as he added a bit to their fuel tank. Then he fixed up the leaky radiator with some special goo that was his own secret recipe.

  “That should keep the old girl running for a bit longer,” he grinned.

  The pirates squeezed back into their truck and drove it up the hill towards the old gold mine. It coughed and spluttered and no matter what the pirates tried, it was making an awful racket.

  “Look at all the rabbits,” said Grot. The rabbits scurried out of the way, just missing the heavy, rumbling wheels of the truck as it struggled up the hill. The sun was setting, but none of the pirates noticed how beautiful it looked.

  There were rabbits everywhere.

  When they arrived at Fungus McPhee’s camp, there was no sign of him. The mine was padlocked and his equipment was neatly packed away. The pirates stumbled from the truck and lit the campfire, chatting excitedly about how much money they’d make from this adventure.

  They would have to wait for Fungus McPhee to show up. Sooner or later, they would find out about his evil plan. A large brown bottle of pirate’s rum was passed around, which soon had them in very good spirits.

  “I’ve got our own plan,” said Bones, “I think I know how we can catch all these rabbits and make us some extra money.”

  “How?” asked three excited pirate voices.

  “Poison,” whispered Bones, “toxic poison and we’ve got a truck load!”

  “We can kill all the rabbits and sell their skins,” roared the pirates.

  “MWUAHA, HA, HAAA!” roared the horrible crew; it was just like old times.

  Hooty the boobook owl had heard everything. He knew he had to warn someone urgently, before it was all too late!

  Captain Pete awoke and leapt out of bed, very excited. All night he’d been dreaming about his new invention. He raced into the kitchen to join Mudpoo and Harry for breakfast.

  “Owls hoot in the key of B-Flat and rabbits are scared of owls. So, if I record some music in B-Flat and play it to the rabbits, they’ll be scared and move away!” said Captain Pete excitedly.

  Harry and Mudpoo were busily chomping on their toast, they looked impressed.

  “Logical thinking,” he declared. “I’ll call my good friend Liz, she can play the fiddle and I’ll play the guitar and we will record something in B-Flat!”

  “What about the ‘Heel and Toe Polka’?” suggested Mudpoo.

  “Great idea, the ‘Heel and Toe Polka’ in B-Flat it is. If that doesn’t scare the rabbits away, nothing will!” replied Captain Pete, thoughtfully munching on his Vegemite toast.

  After breakfast, Captain Pete phoned Liz, who said she’d be glad to help and would bring her fiddle over straight away.

  Liz arrived beaming, looking bright and cheery, carrying her wonderful fiddle. “Hello everyone!” She hugged Mudpoo and Harry and smiled at Captain Pete.

  “Right, let’s get cracking,” said Captain Pete, as he set up the kitchen with equipment to record the ‘Heel and Toe Polka’. It was tricky playing it in B-Flat, Mudpoo and Harry didn’t look too impressed.

  “It doesn’t sound that good,” agonised Mudpoo and Harry nodded in agreement. They snuck out the back door and away from the wailing music.

  “It’s so bad, maybe it’ll work?” suggested Harry, hopefully.

  Harry and Mudpoo visited Gus (the talking Kombi van), who was parked under a gum tree at the top of the garden.

  “I can help,” suggested Gus, “you can attach the speakers to me and hide inside. Then I’ll park myself in the paddock where most of the rabbits are,” he said enthusiastically.

  “Good idea,” replied Mudpoo and Harry together, “this will be a great experiment.”

  “And it’s environmentally friendly,” added Gus with a grin.

  Captain Pete and Liz agreed that Gus would be a great help.

  “Let’s have fruit salad for lunch,” said Liz, who loved eating healthy food.

  After lunch Gus drove them all to a spot in the paddock where everyone thought the most rabbits might appear.

  Over near a corrugated water tank, under the big old gum tree, they set up six of Captain Pete’s best and loudest speakers.

  “Let’s hide inside Gus and turn the music on!” shouted Captain Pete, excitedly.

  They waited and watched and watched and waited. Then they heard a ‘thump, thump, thump, thump, thumperty, thump, thump, thump, thump’ on the roof of Gus.

  “What is that sound?” a
sked Captain Pete, looking perturbed.

  “Hmmm,” said Liz, “I think it’s the sound of rabbits dancing the ‘Heel and Toe Polka’ on Gus’ roof!”

  “What!?” shouted Captain Pete, looking sadly confused, “. . . they’re dancing?”

  Mudpoo and Harry peered out of Gus’ window. They could see hundreds of rabbits dancing to the ‘Heel and Toe Polka’. It was an incredible sight.

  “Gosh, they love the music,” whispered Harry.

  “They’ll probably invite more friends to join them,” suggested Mudpoo, “we’d better turn the music off.”

  Captain Pete, Liz, Harry and Mudpoo left the happy rabbits still joyfully bouncing about dancing (even though the music was off) and walked back to the house.

  They all stopped by the dam to admire the wise, old wedge-tailed eagle who was sitting high on a limb of the dead gum tree.

  “Eagles are birds of prey,” whispered Captain Pete, “they eat rabbits, but only enough to feed their families.”

  “Aren’t they beautiful,” beamed Liz.

  “If only they could scare the rabbits away,” said Captain Pete, thoughtfully.

  “Inland carpet pythons live on rabbits,” suggested Liz hopefully, “maybe we can find some of them to scare the rabbits away.”

  “They’re very rare around here these days, I haven’t seen any for quite a while, it’s almost as though they’ve suddenly just disappeared,” said Captain Pete. “NO . . . I NEED TO COME UP WITH A NEW INVENTION!”

  Harry and Mudpoo were walking through the paddock when they heard a familiar voice.

  “SIZZLING SAUSAGES, Sammy the silver gull at your service!”

  “SAMMY,” cried out Mudpoo and Harry together, “what are you doing here?”

  Sammy was a bit of a hero in another adventure and lives in the Iluka World Heritage Nature Reserve with Grumblegoo, the magical guardian of the rainforest. He’d once made a wish on the ‘Magic Tree Stump’ and could now speak to almost any animal.

  “Grumblegoo thought I should visit you, she was concerned that the animals near here could be in danger,” stammered Sammy.

  “Danger?” wondered Mudpoo, “from what?”

  “We’ve a friend called Hooty the boobook owl who lives near here. He has warned all the boobook owls that there are dangerous things happening in the hills near Bethanga. Grumblegoo heard about this and sent me here to find you and to investigate.”

  “Dangerous things in the hills, I wonder what that could be?” Mudpoo furrowed his brow and scratched his head. “We’d better keep a look out.”

  Sammy said, “I’m going to find Hooty and see if he can fill me in and I’ll report back to you.” With a swift flurry of feathers, he flew off.

  Sammy flew up to the hills and very soon, spotted the old gold mine The four dastardly pirates were sitting around a smouldering campfire, drinking horrible rum and eating left-over food. He quietly flew over to Hooty the boobook owl, who was watching the pirates from a nearby gum tree. They both listened to the pirates boast and ramble.

  “MWUAHA, HA, HAAA!” roared the pirate crew.

  “Today we’ll place our carrots soaked in toxic poison along Flagstaff Road,” roared Snot.

  “Kill all the rabbits,” growled Pong.

  “Skin them alive,” wailed Bones, getting carried away and waving his horrible knife about.

  Grot, who was the biggest and strongest of all the pirates (and secretly the kindest) said in a shocked voice, “That’s a bit too horrible, can’t you skin them when they’re dead?”

  “Oh I suppose so,” muttered Bones reluctantly.

  “Should we wait for Fungus McPhee to arrive?” said Grot in between mouthfuls of plum jam and baked beans.

  “Nah, why share when we can have all the rabbit skins for ourselves, we’ll make a fortune!” grizzled Bones.

  The pirates still hadn’t seen Fungus McPhee, but didn’t hesitate to help themselves to his plentiful supply of food.

  “Tonight, we’ll go in for the kill, under the light of the full moon,” belched Bones.

  “This is our cleverest plan yet,” announced Snot in a loud voice, “we are geniuses!”

  It seemed to the two birds keeping watch, that the more they drank, the more they congratulated themselves about their cleverness.

  “We’d better warn Mudpoo and Harry, I think we’ll need their help,” said Sammy silver gull. Both birds quickly flew back in the direction of Captain Pete’s house.

  “Hey those birds were listening to our secret plans,” yelled Grot.

  “Ya brainless drongo, birds can’t listen, or understand us, they’re just dumb useless animals,” snivelled Snot.

  “MWUAHA, HA, HAAA!” roared the rest of the pirate crew.

  “A toast to tonight,” announced Bones.

  “Cheers,” yelled the pirates and their rowdy late night racket reverberated far down into the valley below.

  ‘There seems to be a bit of noise coming from near the old gold mine tonight,’ thought a sleepy Captain Pete as he snuggled further into bed, unaware of the danger that was brewing in the hills above.

  Sammy the silver gull urgently tapped on Mudpoo and Harry’s window.

  “Wake up, wake up,” cried Sammy, “we need your help.”

  Mudpoo and Harry quickly got dressed and quietly crept outside the house.

  “What’s up? What’s wrong?” whispered Mudpoo, looking at Sammy and Hooty.

  Hooty the boobook owl was sitting on a fencepost nearby with a very frazzled and concerned owl face.

  “There are pirates in the hills and they’re going to lay poisoned carrot baits all the way down Flagstaff Road to kill the rabbits. We’ve got to stop them,” said Sammy in a solemn voice.

  Mudpoo looked very concerned, “I have a little plan,” he said very quickly. “Sammy, ask Hooty if he can gather all of his friends and hide in the trees along the road. Harry and I will hide and wait with an old drum and we’ll see if we can surprise the pirates.”

  They all hurried to the top of Flagstaff Road. It wasn’t too long before Hooty had gathered a small flock of boobook owls that hid in the trees along the edge of the road. Rabbits happily bounced along unaware their lives were in grave danger.

  “Keep your eyes open and look out for pirates,” whispered Sammy to each boobook owl. “Wait for Mudpoo’s signal and we’ll see if we can scare them away.”

  In the stillness of the moonlit night, the sound of four rambling pirates could be heard, coming nearer from a distance.

  Clank, clank, “Shhh,” clank, stumble, “Shhh,” clank, clank, “Shhh,” came the echoes, loudly down the road.

  Bones and Pong, with buckets of poison-soaked carrots, stopped right where Mudpoo and Harry lay hidden.

  “Just scatter the carrots all over the place,” grumbled Bones, “this’ll be dead bunny road by morning.”

  Before Pong could reply, Mudpoo banged on his empty drum, calling the determined boobook owls into action! Silently, in the moonlit night, like deadly stealth attack planes, they swooped with sharp claws raised.

  “Hey watch out!” yelled Bones.

  “What the . . . help, help, HELP! CRAZY FLAPPING BIRDS . . . ,” cried Pong.

  “ARRGHHH . . .” yelled both pirates; warning Snot and Grot, “let’s get out of here!”

  The pirates ran frantically, as fast as they could, back towards Fungus McPhee’s goldmine, with the boobook owls in hot pursuit.

  “That’s far enough,” yelled Sammy, “we’ve frightened them away,” he called out to the boobook owls, who’d been very brave. Sammy decided he had better find out who else was around and quickly flew off in the direction of the old gold mine.

  Mudpoo and Harry carefully collected all of the poisoned carrots, cautiously placed them in their drum and made sure the lid was firmly shut tight. “We’d better follow them,” suggested Mudpoo, “I’m sure they’re up to no good.”

  In silence, they followed the pirates’ tracks, carefully and cautiously, back
up to the old gold mine.

  Ow!” “Oooh!” “Ow!” “Arh, arrghh!” The pirates groaned. “What attacked us?” muttered Snot.

  The pirates were all sitting around their campfire, nursing their scratches from the owls.

  “Ghosts?” suggested a frightened Pong.

  “Nah, crazy birds!” growled Bones.

  “What were they doing?” asked Grot. “Maybe they didn’t like us putting out the poisoned carrots?”

  “Don’t be an idiot . . . it was that loud, banging sound that scared them,” argued Bones.

  “Ghosts?” asked Pong again.

  “Nah, just crazy birds, I’m sick of this place. Where is Fungus McPhee?” complained Snot.

  “If he doesn’t show up soon, we’re going,” growled Bones.

  Mudpoo and Harry were laying in the long grass, just by the old goldmine. They were well hidden and were listening intently to the pirates’ every word.

  “You useless, rowdy lot,” yelled a gruff voice from the edge of the forest.

  “FUNGUS McPHEE!” cried the pirates together in surprise.

  “Where have you been?!” demanded Bones, “We’ve been attacked and chased by goodness-knows-what and there’s been no sign of you for days.”

  “I’ve been busy,” spat Fungus McPhee, “serves you right for being so stupid.”

  “What do you mean, ‘stupid’?” snarled Snot.

  “You’re sitting outside a goldmine, right at the feet of a fortune and you want to catch rabbits?” gurgled Fungus McPhee, “You’re thicker than bricks and that’s a fact!” and he spat again.

  “What is our job? Where is the gold?” demanded Bones.