Just Until Christmas

by Carole Towriss

  “’Cause you’re what I’m most thankful for this year.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  HOPE CLOSED HER EYES AGAINST the noise. Women chattered. Little boys chased each other. Girls giggled. Pots and pans clanged.

  She took air in through her nose and blew it out through her mouth, like she’d seen pregnant women on television do. To say the walls were closing in might be a little extreme, but it was become more and more difficult to breathe. It felt like there was a metal band around her chest, slowly tightening with each person that came and talked to her. Hugged her. Bubbled and smiled and gushed over the joy of life. There were just way too many people in this house.

  And dinner hadn’t even started yet. They probably went around and said what they were thankful for. While holding hands.

  She had to find Ian. Why had he abandoned her? She skirted around his sisters decorating the tree, avoided the nephews playing with the toy cars, and found him leaving the kitchen. “I have to go.”

  His jaw hung open a moment. “Why?” He set the basket of warm rolls on the table.

  “I just do.” She hurried to the front closet and hunted for her jacket, shoving sweaters and coats aside.

  “Then I’ll go with you.”

  “Don’t.” She put her hand on his chest, held him at arm’s length. “Just stay.”

  “Hope ... talk to me.” He tried to catch her eyes.

  She avoided his gaze. She couldn’t let his warmth suck her back in. “Can’t.”

  “But why? Why are you leaving?” He reached for her arm.

  “I just can’t deal with all ... this.” She shrugged him off and opened the front door.

  “OK. Then we’ll leave together.” He followed her onto the front porch, closing the door behind him.

  She scoffed. “You’d leave your family. Why would you do that?”

  “Because I care about you.”

  “You’re not my boyfriend.”

  “I’m your friend.”

  “Only for three more weeks.”

  “Why? Why does it have to end then?”

  Shrugging on her jacket, she hurried down the driveway. “Just go inside, Ian. Go to your family, and leave me alone.”

  “I don’t want to leave you alone.”

  She halted and turned to face him. “I’ve always been alone. And the last couple months have been a nice diversion, but they really didn’t change anything.”

  “Hope, you have explain this to me. Help me understand what’s going on here.”

  Rubbing her forehead, she sighed deeply. “My mom died when I was twelve, right?”

  “Yes.” He tried to take her hand, but she pulled it away.

  “I lived with my father, but he couldn’t really deal with it. We moved around a lot. I went to a different school every year, sometimes two. I never really knew my extended family—aunts, uncles, cousins. It was just me and my dad, and he wasn’t really there, you know? I’m just not used to all this ... togetherness. There are just too many people in there for me, and they all want to talk to me and get to know me and be nice to me and they’re all so happy ... ” It was just so ... not her.

  He placed his hands on her shoulders, and drew them gently down her arms until he reached her hands. OK. I can understand that.” His voice was soft. “Then let me take you somewhere else. My house. Your house. We’ll go someplace quiet, just the two of us. Please don’t go home all alone. It’s not good for you.”

  She crossed her arms over her chest. “Says who? You’re not my boyfriend, and you’re not my father. You don’t get to tell me what to do.” She kept her tone gentle, but he wasn’t going to control her.

  “I’m not trying to. I’m begging you to let me help you. If you won’t, I’ll turn around and go back inside. But I’d rather be with you. We can take some food home from here, or get a pizza. Then we can go to your house, or mine, and watch a movie, or do whatever you want. Your call entirely.”

  Was he serious? Could she trust him? She wanted to. “OK. My house. You bring the food. Turkey, Chinese, whatever you want. I’ll wait for you.”

  His eyes lit up like the lights on the tree in his living room. “I’ll grab my jacket and be there in half an hour.” He cupped her face and placed a kiss on her cheek before bounding back up the drive.

  Those blue eyes were so hard to resist. Hopefully, they hadn’t just sweet-talked her into a huge mistake.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  IAN PUNCHED THE SPEED DIAL on his phone and heard it ring twice.

  “Ian?”

  “Feel like going shopping?”

  She laughed. “The day after Thanksgiving? Are you insane?”

  “I didn’t know how hardcore a shopper you were.”

  “Not that hard. Besides, I think stores should all be closed today. Let the workers stay home with their families. I think Black Friday is a terrible idea. Wait ... are you open today? I didn’t just insult you, did I?”

  He chuckled. “No, we’re closed. Want to do something? Or do you have to work, or do stuff for the house?” Please say no.

  “Nope, I’m not working today, and I only have a celling fan left for the house, and it’s on backorder.”

  “Let me know when it comes in and I’ll put it in for you.”

  “Thanks. That would be wonderful. Then I can get it listed and get it sold. What did you have in mind for today?”

  “We could drive down to see the ponies. Or we could probably find a tree lighting somewhere.”

  “The ponies—oh, I always wanted to see them. Let’s do that.”

  “OK. Be there in fifteen.”

  When he pulled up to her house, she was waiting on the porch. He hopped out of his jeep and walked around to her side of the car. “You look beautiful today.”

  “Thank you. You look good in red.” She pointed to his sweater.

  “Oh. My mom gave it to me. One of the last gifts she picked out.” Pain pricked his heart for a moment.

  “She did good.” She patted his chest.

  “She was always good at picking out clothes for people.” He closed her door and climbed in his seat.

  About an hour into the ride, her phone rang. She glanced at the number and silenced it. Fifteen minutes later, it rang again.

  “Aren’t you going to answer that?”

  “No.” She stared out the window.

  “Chicago again?”

  She huffed and turned to him. “What makes you say that?”

  “‘Cause only Chicago gets you worked up like that. They call on the day after Thanksgiving?”

  “My time is up on Monday. They’re getting very antsy.”

  “Do you have the money?”

  She was silent.

  He pulled the jeep to the side of the road and jerked up the emergency brake. “What happens if you can’t pay?”

  “I don’t know.” Her voice cracked. “It’s so not fair. It’s not my fault my father was a crook.”

  “Hope, please let me help you.” He rubbed her back.

  She studied her hands. “I hate feeling so helpless.”

  “Borrowing money to get out of a situation you fell into through no fault of your own does not mean you’re helpless. Or dumb, or anything else you’re thinking I might be thinking. I believe you are a strong, brave, resourceful, and beautiful woman who needs to learn to accept help.”

  “What about you?”

  “Me what?”

  “Do you ever accept help?”

  “Rob just invested in the store. In this economy, it might not have survived otherwise. Now he owns nearly half of what has been a MacKay store for generations, and has made some significant changes. That also allowed my father to retire earlier than he planned to stay home and care for my mom.”

  “Wow. I never would have guessed.”

  “Why?”

  She shrugged. “You just seem to have ... everything ... all together all the time.”

  “Like I keep trying to tell you, it’s not a weakness
to let others in.” How had she developed armor so unbelievably tough?

  Her phone trilled.

  “Now, not that I’m telling you what to do,”—he grinned—“but I think you should answer that. Tell them you’ll have all the money first thing Monday morning. When we get back we can draw up an agreement if you want. We can even see my lawyer if it makes you more comfortable. And we’ll transfer the money to your account as soon as the banks open.”

  The phone chimed again. She answered it, and delivered the message.

  “Better?” He tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and left his hand on her cheek.

  “Yeah, actually. Thanks.”

  “Any time. How about some ponies?”

  She placed her hand over his. “Ponies it is.”

  He released the parking brake and steered the jeep back onto the road.

  Why did she have to be going back so soon? And why was his heart betraying him? He kept telling himself he had no business falling in love, but there seemed to be no way to stop it.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  HOPE WASN’T QUITE READY WHEN Ian knocked. She peeked thorough the side lights. He looked great, as usual. Jeans, a black t-shirt, sport coat.

  She pulled the door open. “Hey, I need just a few more minutes.”

  “Why? You look perfect.” There was that smile.

  “Let me grab a sweater. Movie theaters are always cold.”

  “I could keep you warm.” He grinned.

  I’m sure you could. “Just stop.” She laughed as she opened the hall closet and chose a pink sweater to go with the white blouse she was wearing.

  “Hey, I heard that the high school is looking for an English teacher for next semester.”

  She clenched her teeth. “I won’t be here next semester.”

  “You didn’t seem all that eager to go back to Bethesda last time we talked.”

  “Doesn’t mean I’m looking for a job.” She called from the kitchen as she locked the back door.

  “I’m just passing on something I heard.”

  “You sure that’s all it is?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Sure you’re not trying to find a way to keep me here?”

  “Keep you here? Wha—”

  She tried to slow her breathing. “Seems to me you’ve been doing a lot of things to try to make me want to stay here.”

  “Like what?”

  “You keep telling me how beautiful it is here—”

  “It is beautiful. I love it here. I grew up here. After I graduated I could have gone anywhere. I chose to come back here!”

  She put her fists on her hips. “And there’s the money.”

  “They were going to garnish your wages! What would you have done for food? I was only trying to help. How is that keeping you here? You can pay me back from anywhere, any time. We put that in writing, at your request.”

  “That’s not all. There’s the kitten.”

  He squeezed his eyes shut. “The kitten?”

  “Yeah, the kitten. What am I supposed to do with him when I leave? Drag him on a three-hour car trip? He’d be throwing up by the Bay Bridge.”

  “I thought of that. But I wanted to make you happy while you were here. And if you decided you couldn’t take him with you I would have no problem finding that kitten a home. Any little girl would love her.”

  “Are you calling me a little girl now?”

  “Oh, my—No! Where did you get that? Are you crazy?” He threw his hands in the air.

  “Apparently! I never should have trusted you. I thought you were a friend, someone I could have fun with while I was here.”

  “I am your friend. I care deeply about you. I’m just passing on information, trying to give you options. Believe me, I would never tell you what to do.”

  “Sure you would. It’s what you’ve been doing all along.” She stomped away.

  “Hope, what are you talking about?”

  “All these little things you’ve been doing. You’ve just been setting me up.”

  “Hope, I swear I’m not trying to control you. Forget about the job. Forget I ever said anything. Can we just go to the move and have a nice evening?”

  “No! We can’t just forget about it! I think you should leave.”

  “Leave?”

  She crossed her arms. “Yes. You should leave.”

  He reached for her. “Hope, please talk to me. I really don’t understand what happened here.”

  She backed away. “You need to go.”

  Ian swallowed hard. “Hope, I don’t know what I did, but I am sorry. I would never hurt you. You have no idea how much I care about you.” Shoulders slumped, he turned and left, closing the door behind him.

  So it had finally happened. She should have known it wouldn’t last.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  “SO BEFORE I KNOW IT, she’s kicking me out of her house and I don’t even know what I did wrong.” Ian slammed the desk drawer shut, flinching at the sound reverberating through the office.

  “What exactly did she say?” Rob gently closed the drawer that had bounced open.

  “She said I was trying to control her. That loaning her the money, giving her the kitten, and telling her about this job were all ways to try to control her and make her stay here in Brandon Beach.”

  “And were you?”

  “No! You know I know better than that. She said she hated her job, she wanted to teach, so I told her about the opening at the community college. That’s all.” He stood and paced in front of the desk. “But now, I’m like all the other men in her life, secretly out to micromanage her entire life as part of some huge, evil plot.”

  Rob leaned against the desk.

  “I don’t know what to do now.”

  “Do? You stay away, dude. At least for a while.”

  “Shouldn’t I apologize?”

  “Not now. She can’t hear it. You’ve got to give her time to calm down. She’s smart. Give her some space and let her think it out. She’ll realize you aren’t evil. Doesn’t mean you’ll have a chance with her, but I think she’ll see you didn’t mean anything by what you said.”

  “I hope so. I don’t want her to hate me. I don’t expect to have a chance with her, but I really do want to be her friend.”

  “If you really want what’s best for her, stay away for now, and pray for her.”

  “I’ve been praying for her. Every day.”

  “Then do what you told her to do. Put your hope in Him. Wait on the Lord.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  A KNOCK ON THE DOOR was followed by the sound of it slowly opening. Hope glanced up from her spot on the couch.

  “Rob. What are you doing here?”

  “Ian told me you’d bought a new ceiling fan and he was going to help you put it in. He didn’t think he should come over now.”

  Hope set aside her book and unwrapped herself from the blanket. “He’s right about that. I’m still very angry with him.”

  “So I’ve heard. But if you’ll get me the fan, I’ll put in in for you.”

  “Why?”

  “So it will be ready for you to sell. Or stay. Or whatever. I don’t know. He just asked me to help you.”

  “He did?” Why would Ian help her get the house ready to sell if her wanted her to stay? That didn’t make sense. But still...

  “Yes. Is this it on the table?” He moved to the dining room.

  “Yeah. It is. I’ll get a step ladder.”

  “Thanks. May I move the coffee table?”

  “Sure.” She returned with the ladder and grabbed the other end of the table.

  Rob climbed up and unscrewed the old fan from the ceiling.

  “There’s nothing I hate more than being lied to. He had this all planned from the start.”

  “Had what planned from the start?”

  “He’s been trying to keep me here. The kitten, the loan, the job. He made it all sound so innocent, but he’s trying to control me. I won’t s
tand for it.”

  “Hope, I really don’t want to get between you two, but may I tell you a few things?”

  She eyed him for several long seconds before agreeing.

  He stepped back down. “First, Ian wasn’t trying to arrange anything. He grew up here. He knows people and he hears things and he knows how to get things done. What you didn’t give him a chance to tell you is that job is only for the next semester. The teacher is going on maternity leave and is returning in September. So if he were trying to keep you here with that, he wouldn’t be doing a very good job.”

  Her cheeks heated. “Oh. I guess I didn’t let him finish.”

  “Second, Ian learned the hard way that you can’t make anyone stay with you who doesn’t want to stay. It almost always backfires.”

  “What do you mean ‘the hard way’?”

  “He’d kill me if I told you. You’re really leaving?”

  “I don’t see any other choice.”

  “In our last year of grad school, he fell in love with a girl named Katie. I never really liked her, but whatever. I didn’t want to marry her.”

  “He was engaged?”

  “Almost. She wanted to go see Europe, travel, live life, she said. He convinced her to stay with him, said they belonged together, he knew it, etc, etc. She did, for a while. She left about two months after graduation.”

  “Wow.”

  “So you see, he would never try to get you to stay here. No matter how badly he wanted you to. He really was just trying to help.”

  “But all that information ...”

  “He was just passing on what he heard. He knew you would rather be teaching.” He set down the screwdriver. “Hope, did you ever think maybe God had plans for you? Maybe it wasn’t Ian’s idea, but God’s?”

  “I made plans. Good plans. Financially sound plans. Why would God mess them up? Let others keep messing them up?”

  “Proverbs 19 says ‘Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.’ Look, I’m not saying I know what God has in mind for your life. Maybe you are meant to go back to Bethesda. I’m just saying that maybe you should talk to God about it. I care about you, too, Hope. I consider you a friend, and I’d like to see you and Ian both happy, whether that’s together or apart.” He picked up the screwdriver and stepped back up on the ladder.