Reaching For Risks

by Jemi Fraser

Pushing away the memories was easier this time and she listened hard to see what Quinn would do. Would he need to talk to someone or would he rather be alone? Silence.

  It was long minutes before she heard the sound of footsteps on the stairs and she wondered if he’d been leaning back against the door, building the strength to face the stairs. The encounter would have drained him.

  Unless she was reading too much into his expressions and body language. But he’d been hurting. A lot.

  Maybe the men had come to an understanding of some kind. Maybe they’d gotten drunk in celebration.

  Or, maybe Quinn was still hurting.

  Barely breathing, Darby scooted down a couple of stairs, keeping to the shadows.

  His feet dragged up the stairs, sounding like he’d gained a hundred pounds over the last few hours. Once he reached the second floor, Quinn paused, head down and rested against the banister.

  Darby didn’t move, didn’t even breathe. Could she help? Should she?

  Uncertain, Darby watched and listened as he took a deep breath and then another. When he lifted his head, it was to unerringly lock his eyes on hers. For the span of a dozen heartbeats, they stared at each other.

  Darby stretched her feet down a few steps and rose to her feet. He shook his head softly at her but she could feel the pain across the room and she took another step down.

  “Go to bed, Darby.” His husky voice barely reached her and her feet moved closer in response.

  Quinn didn’t move from his spot, didn’t move a single muscle but his eyes never left hers as she continued to close in. “I’m not fit for company, Darby. Go to bed.”

  “I’m not company.”

  His mouth quirked momentarily at that then settled back into a grim line. In the shadows, he resembled a hero from the old black and white movies. A hero with a past that haunted him.

  Darby closed in until she stood directly in front of him, tilting her head up to search his eyes. Pain. Sorrow. Guilt. Banked desire.

  And all of it Quinn. No shadows of his brother or his father, just the man she knew. Quinn. He’d done a lot for her and she wanted to help him now. She reached up a hand to stroke his cheek, to offer comfort.

  Quinn trapped her hand against his skin. So soft. So gentle. “You should go, Darby.”

  “Are you all right?”

  He closed his eyes and huffed out a breath. When he opened them the pain was banked. The desire wasn’t.

  With a soft groan, Quinn moved his hand from hers, up her arm, over her shoulder to cup her neck. His eyes searched hers and she let him see. No backing down now. Not when she could only see Quinn.

  For long moments, his thumb caressed her lower lip and the fire built between them. The air thickened until she could only manage shallow breaths as her pulse thundered in her veins. Her tongue reached out to brush his thumb and the taste had lava simmering low in her belly.

  Quinn drew in a shallow breath and then his head dropped and his mouth captured hers in a kiss that accelerated to warp speed in a heartbeat. Her entire body rose to meet him and he banded an arm around her waist to anchor her hard against him.

  No kiss had consumed her like this. Every part of her wanted it. Wanted more, wanted closer. Her hands reached up to grip his shirt and she felt his strength beneath. She traced the muscles then reached up and circled her hands around his neck and into his hair. His soft moan had her squirming to get closer still.

  His own hands dropped to her hips and without lifting his mouth from hers he walked her backward until she was pressed against the wall. Still, their mouths crashed against each other, battling to find each and every pleasure center.

  Darby’s pulse raced until she was light-headed. For a moment she wondered how to keep herself upright but then decided Quinn would have to worry about that. She was too busy absorbing the pleasure.

  His hands skimmed along her torso. Her robe shifted with the movement, creating even more friction and heat. Then his hands were inside the robe, one layer closer to where she wanted them, needed them. Up and down, his heat searing her through her brother’s t-shirt, bunching it up then dragging it down until she wanted to scream with frustration. Except her mouth was too busy devouring his to protest.

  As his hands continued to torture, Quinn murmured her name against her lips then moved them along her jawline, nibbling his way to her collarbone and her ear. Shivers covered her shivers and her head fell back against the wall, her body limp with need.

  Quinn pressed his leg between hers to keep her steady and the pressure of his jeans on her core was exquisite. Then his hands finally—finally—reached beneath the t-shirt to find her desperate skin beneath.

  Darby breathed out his name as her skin tried to adjust to the texture of his touch. The callused fingers gripped her hips lightly while his thumbs brushed soft circles over her skin, sending liquid heat down to her toes.

  She wanted to do some touching of her own but every part of her will was involved in keeping herself standing and absorbing one delicious touch after the other. Soon, she promised herself, soon.

  When his fingers started to move, Darby bit her lip to keep the noise to a whimper. Quinn whispered her name and moved back to consume her mouth.

  His thumbs grazed up and skimmed the underside of her breasts, causing her bones to completely disintegrate. If his leg hadn’t held her up, she’d have slithered to the ground. With a soft chuckle against her mouth, he traced his tongue along her parted lips. Then his thumbs moved over her breasts, around the edges, slipping closer and closer to where she craved his touch.

  Darby arched against the wall, pressing herself into his hands, desperate for him. He swallowed her cry as he finally brushed his thumbs over her nipples. His fingers followed and teased and stroked and played while she could do nothing but drink in the amazing sensations.

  “Quinn.” His name felt so good on her tongue, she said it again. And again.

  Suddenly she was set on her feet, t-shirt pulled down, robe being tied in front. Quinn swore then steadied her with his hands then swore again. He lifted his hands from her like he was surrendering then backed away a step. She wobbled again and he reached out one hand to help.

  “Shit. I’m sorry, Darby. So sorry.” He waved away her protest, talked right over her. “I shouldn’t have done that. Ever. Christ. I’m a jerk. It won’t happen again. Not like this. Sorry.”

  Then he stormed down the hall and into his room, slamming the door behind him.

  Dazed, Darby stared at the closed door and wondered what the hell had happened. And more importantly, why it had stopped.

  She didn’t want it to stop. She wanted more. She wanted it all.

  Why had he stopped? Hadn’t she made it more than clear that she wanted to jump into bed with him? Or let him take her right there against the wall. Or on the stairs. The floor. She wasn’t fussy.

  She took a step toward his room, put her hand on the wall to keep herself upright when her legs wavered.

  Didn’t he want her?

  Idiot. Of course, he had. His hands and body hadn’t been lying. She might not have oodles of experience but she wasn’t a fool. He’d been as consumed by their kisses as she had been. So why?

  Another step. Steadier. She should fling open his door and demand some answers. And maybe an orgasm or two to make up for the stop time.

  But he’d walked away and she couldn’t face the humiliation if he turned her away again.

  Did it have something to do with his meeting with his father? Ridiculous. What had happened had nothing to do with any Charters other than Quinn.

  Now she had another Charters messing with her. The big difference was that she wanted this one.

  Wanted him badly.

  And it couldn’t all be blamed on the sexual overload she was experiencing. Nope. Quinn Charters had wiggled his way into her life and into her heart.

  Sadly, it seemed he didn’t want to be there.

  Darby turned to trudge up the stairs. Time to update t
he Risk List because that had definitely qualified as being kissed.

  Looked like she should have added another item to the list. Survive rejection.

  QUINN kicked off his shoes, stripped and walked into the shower without waiting for it to heat up. Cold was good. Cold would stop his body lusting after Darby.

  Darby who’d looked at him with her heart in her eyes. Visible for anyone to see. Even him.

  Hell. He wasn’t fit for anything other than a rough tangle in the sheets.

  Which Darby had appeared more than ready for as well.

  She wasn’t.

  Darby was all about her heart. All about the real world. Love and family. Trust. Honesty.

  A world he didn’t fit into.

  Water pounded over his neck and shoulders but the tension remained.

  Who was he?

  A rich kid whose family couldn’t hang on to millions of dollars?

  A user?

  How many of those damn genes had been passed on down? His reaction tonight showed the violence had. It had taken every last bit of willpower he possessed to not pound his father into a pulp. He’d had to hang onto the railing to keep his fists to himself.

  At least he’d stopped himself from using those tainted hands on Darby. He’d been so consumed with lust he could have hurt her. Taken and taken without giving a damn thing.

  Christ. She was so much better. She deserved so much more.

  He’d spent hours kicking his own ass for not having it out with his father at the pier. At least then he’d know. The possibilities were driving him crazy. After leaving the man, he’d stopped at CharterGear and dug the registered letter out of the bin hoping for more information. “You are required at home. Immediately.” Almost word for word what his father had said.

  No information. A practiced, rehearsed line, which meant it was bad.

  The ass hadn’t answered when he’d asked if anyone was sick. Typical. Only giving the information he wanted, not answering questions unless they suited his purposes. Always had to be in control.

  Could he actually have blown through millions? How? Even on his best spending sprees buying stock for the store, Quinn had panic attacks about the cash and he was talking thousands, not millions. How could people who shared his blood be so cavalier about money? And people?

  Which all went back to why he’d taken off from his family the first time.

  Sawyer’s Myla had been abandoned as an infant. Sometimes he almost wished the same thing had happened to him. Almost. From the beginning, he hadn’t fit in. While his brother enjoyed the lifestyle, Quinn had wanted to play football and baseball. Or play in the mud. Sports had been his joy and that made him a freak according to his parents who said important people didn’t play games. Their people. Games were beneath them. They were for the common folk.

  Quinn wanted to be part of the common folk. Their limo had driven by some public schools on the way to dropping the brothers off at their very private, very exclusive School for Snobbery. So many times he’d wanted to tell the driver to stop and let him watch the games kids played. They’d run screaming around the playground, hung out laughing with friends. Everyone wore different clothes. They weren’t walking clones afraid to dirty their knees or wrinkle their shirts.

  The purchase of the summer home in Bloo Moose had been heaven for Quinn. Philip had hated it, thought the people were beneath him. Not surprising as the brothers had never had the same opinion on anything.

  Quinn had found a baseball team looking for a shortstop. He’d played pickup football in the fields. Gone swimming and learned how to cannonball along with the best of them. Waterskiing, fishing, kayaking.

  He’d snuck out at nights to join the parties on the beach, to skinny dip with the bravest of the girls. He’d enjoyed a lot of firsts during those parties.

  Firsts with real people. People who might have known he came from money but who hadn’t given a shit about it. Still didn’t. In Bloo Moose, he’d learned to laugh at himself when he’d screwed up and not worry about how it would affect the family reputation.

  Going back to Connecticut after Bloo Moose had been hell. There he had more tabs kept on him. He wasn’t allowed to find his own friends. Instead. he was expected to study finance and learn how to invest their money in order to make more and more and more.

  Nothing else mattered in that house.

  And now it was probably all gone.

  What a waste. That money could have done so much good.

  But his father had never appreciated charity. Which had caused the final blow up. When he’d turned nineteen his father had given Quinn real money to invest. Part of his idea of education. Expected him to at least triple it. Quinn had done a shitload of research and then donated it to a bunch of kids’ charities, helped some kids get the medical care they needed and others get a chance to get out of really poor areas and head to camps in the woods.

  In Quinn’s opinion, the money was going to more than triple in value. Those kids would survive, grow and give back to the world. What could possibly be better than that?

  His father had hit the roof. And him.

  At first, Quinn had been too shocked to fight back and the cane the old man used as an affectation had landed a dozen good blows before Quinn had stopped it.

  Then Quinn had walked away without a word. Hadn’t seen them since. Now the bastard expected him to come home because he was needed. Expected Quinn to rescue him.

  Too damn bad.

  But Quinn was left slimy by association.

  The cold water had taken care of the immediate lust so Quinn cranked the heat to see if he could burn off the anger as well. Christ, he’d pretty well attacked Darby. When he’d returned to the B&B he’d been looking to burn off the anger and adrenaline and she’d been handy.

  And willing.

  Those eyes had offered him everything. Every last thing. She’d offered that sweet body to him on a platter. The soft sounds she’d made as his slightest touch had nearly had him exploding like a horny teenager finally getting to second base.

  So responsive. So soft and giving.

  God, she’d trembled at every touch. If he hadn’t held her up she might have slumped to the ground. And they’d barely gotten started.

  No way was their first time going to be when he was filled with anger and shame, when he was looking for a way to feel clean again. No one deserved that kind of treatment, especially not Darby.

  Hell, the woman had made a list because she wasn’t sure of herself or her charms. She didn’t believe she was attractive. Had she never looked in a mirror? She was convinced she didn’t know how to have fun yet she brought smiles and laughter to everyone.

  Their first time together was going to be when he was firmly in control and it was going to be all about her. Watching her tremble and quiver at his touch. Finding out her sweet spots, finding out what made her purr.

  It was going to be slow.

  And thorough.

  How would she react in the throes of an orgasm? Would she gasp? Pant? Scream? No, he couldn’t imagine her as a screamer but he could see her melting and gasping in surprise. And delight.

  Back arched, hands gripping his sheets. Or his ass.

  A soft sheen of sweat covering that beautiful skin.

  With a muttered curse, Quinn cranked back the water back to cold.

  Awkward All The Way

  Darby peeked out of the parlour window—again—to find Quinn hammering yet another board onto the front porch. After her disastrous attempt at comforting him the night before, she’d expected him to be gone.

  Half-hoped to find him gone. But he’d been up before her and working on the loose porch boards for hours.

  He must be hungry and thirsty but she couldn’t bring him anything.

  How could she face him after she’d thrown herself at him when it was the last thing he needed? The man had obviously been devastated by his father’s visit and her ramped up libido had her offering a seduction instead of a comforting hu
g. She’d forced herself right up in his face and touched him. Caressed him. What man in his right mind would refuse an offer like that?

  But he had.

  Which said all kinds of things about her seduction skills. Her makeover may have worked on the outside but she needed a lot more work before she was irresistible. And there she was, thinking about herself again.

  Instead, she needed to figure out a way to fix this with Quinn. It was going to be awkward and embarrassing and awful. Completely awful. She couldn’t do it.

  Not after her disturbingly bad performance last night. She’d never thrown herself at a man before. Never wanted to. Not the way she’d wanted to with Quinn. His presence was turning her into a sex maniac. Well, she would be one if the man would cooperate.

  Darby smacked herself on the side of the head and moved back to the bedroom she’d finished painting. Cleaning up her mess in there would take her mind off the sexy man pounding on her porch and give her time to figure out how to clean up the mess with him.

  The bedroom was at the front of the house so Darby could hear the rhythmic pounding of the hammer. And, nymphomaniac that she was that sent her mind skittering in a whole different direction.

  Time to get a grip. The man didn’t want to be interested. She didn’t need to put herself, or him, through that kind of nonsense. She’d have to be satisfied that between Quinn and the Risk List, her libido and her brain had finally woken up.

  This morning, she’d checked off Numbers Seven and Eight—kiss and be kissed—in the notebook. It had taken her a bit to decide on Eight but even though she’d started it Quinn had definitely kissed her so it had gotten the check.

  The man could kiss. She’d wanted him to keep going, keep exploring. The experience had made her want to add all kinds of interesting things to the list. New places to be kissed. New places to kiss.

  Not going to happen, at least not with Quinn and now she couldn’t imagine being interested in anyone else.

  There were still items she hadn’t checked off. Flirting for one. She really needed to learn how to do that. Without using Quinn.

  To do that, she’d have to leave the B&B and her Reno List was screaming at her. With a wedding coming up in a few weeks, she’d added to that list as well.