Reaching For Risks

by Jemi Fraser

  Quinn let go of his brother’s arm long enough to slam his fist into his face. And then again. And again.

  When Philip’s eyes rolled back in his head, Quinn eased back a little but didn’t relax completely. The bastard could be faking it. He almost wished he was so he could hit him again. “Darby? You okay?” His voice shook but he didn’t want to risk taking his eyes off Philip. No answer.

  Leaning forward, he put all of his weight on Philip’s arms and turned his head. Darby sat a couple of yards away, holding the gun with shaking hands, eyes huge and luminous.

  No blood.

  Shirt ripped but intact.

  A purple bruise on her swollen cheek.

  Quinn leaned back and hit his brother again then looked back to her. “It’s okay, Darby. Put the gun somewhere safe. Call Dave. Sawyer, too.”

  Both the swinging door and the back door flew open and Darby squealed again. Sawyer and Dave burst into the room, guns up and searching.

  Eyes wide, Darby swung the gun up and toward the noise and Quinn wasn’t sure if she saw them or if she still saw Philip in her mind. “Darby. Gun down. It’s okay.”

  Her head whipped back around to him and the gun lowered enough for Sawyer to swoop it up while Quinn left his brother and scooted to her. Let Dave and Sawyer handle the asshole, he needed to take care of Darby.

  Quinn squatted in front of her, cupped her face and tilted it so he could see her eyes. At first, she didn’t look up but when he whispered her name, her lashes lifted. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?”

  Quinn heard his voice break and he swallowed hard to steady it. The last thing she needed was him breaking down.

  For a long minute, they looked at each other. Slowly her eyes changed and he watched as she swallowed the fear and knew the moment she saw him, truly saw him. “I’m fine.” But a shudder ran through her and Quinn swung her onto his lap and wrapped her in his arms. She whispered his name and burrowed into his chest. Nothing had ever felt so good.

  “I’m going to kill him.” Sawyer’s voice rumbled through them, making Darby shudder again.

  Quinn nodded, unable to help himself. Brother or not, Philip had harmed Darby and he was going to pay.

  “No.” Her whisper was loud enough to freeze Sawyer in his tracks when nothing Dave could have done would have stopped him. Quinn rubbed his hands over her, assuring himself she was whole and mostly uninjured.

  He felt her take a deep breath. “No.” Louder. More sure of herself. She lifted her head to look up at her brother. “No, Sawyer. I need you. Myla needs you. We can’t have you if you’re in jail.”

  Sawyer growled again but she turned away from her brother to look at him. “You too, Quinn. I need you, too.” Her eyes filled with tears but she battled them back. “I don’t know why you disappeared or where you went but I’m glad you came back when you did. You saved me, Quinn. Thank you.”

  The terror filled him again as he thought of what he’d interrupted. If he hadn’t come in, who knew what Philip might have done. But none of it would have happened if he hadn’t left in the first place. “I’m sorry, Darby. I shouldn’t have gone looking for him. Then my phone died and I ran out of gas and Mrs. Hammond scared the hell out of me and...” He stopped and took a deep breath. “None of that matters right now. I screwed up, Darby. I’m sorry so damn sorry.”

  Her lips trembled as she tried to smile. “I’m fine, Quinn, you saved me. It’s okay.”

  No, it wasn’t. Not yet. But he sure as hell was going to fix that, too.

  Final Risk

  Over. It was over.

  Deputy Vi Hart had arrived and she and Dave had taken Philip off in cuffs.

  Over.

  Sawyer rubbed her arm then pulled her in for a long hug. She felt the tears prickling again but forced them back. She was okay. Quinn was okay. “I’m good, Sawyer. It’s over.”

  He laughed into her hair. “I’m supposed to be the one comforting you, sis.” He squeezed her tight then released her to study her eyes. Apparently satisfied she wasn’t going to fall apart, Sawyer released her and turned to Quinn. “You’re taking care of her.” A statement, not a question. She started to protest but Quinn nodded and agreed too quickly for her to interrupt.

  Sawyer kissed her on the head and turned to leave. “I’ll hold off Myla for a couple of hours. Let me know when she can come and see you.”

  She nodded and followed Sawyer to the door, locking and bolting it after he left. More drained than she’d imagined possible, she rested her head against the door.

  It was over. All of it.

  Philip was locked up.

  He wouldn’t hurt her anymore. Or Quinn.

  “You okay?”

  Good question. “I don’t know.” Behind her, he drew in a deep breath but she forestalled his words. “Don’t you dare apologize again for what your creep of a brother tried to do. It’s on him, not you.”

  She summoned the energy to turn around and lean on the door so she could study Quinn. He stood in front of her, hands in his pockets, shoulders down, face full of shame and guilt.

  That made her even angrier at Philip and gave her the energy boost she needed to push off the door and poke Quinn in the chest. “He’s a creep. You’re not. He’s also a user and delusional. You’re not. You’re not him, Quinn. And you’re not responsible for his actions either so please don’t feel guilty. There’s nothing you could have done to stop him.”

  “Which time, Darby?”

  He knew? The way he was watching her eyes, there’s no way he could have missed her reaction.

  He ran his hands through his hair and over his face. “Shit. Something did happen years ago. Mrs. Hammond told me she thought something had. I didn’t know. I didn’t have any idea. Why didn’t you tell me? No, scratch that. Tell me now, Darby, tell me.”

  His eyes pleaded with her and she caved. She didn’t want to relive it again but he deserved the truth. All of it. Moving past Quinn, she walked to the island and laid her palms on top of it. “It was years ago, when we were kids.”

  “Don’t make excuses for him.” His voice was as harsh as she’d ever heard it.

  She shook her head. “I’m not, or at least I’m not trying to. Sawyer had headed off to the military and I’d moved into that apartment.” Quinn came to sit at the nearest stool and covered her hand with his. She kept her eyes on the countertop. “I’d walked home after my shift at the ice cream parlor. He must have been waiting in the hallway around the corner because I didn’t see him. I had my key in my hand and when I opened the apartment door, he shoved me inside and slammed me to the ground.”

  She swallowed hard, lifted her eyes to look out the window across the room. Quinn’s hand remained warm and steady on hers, helping her to tell it straight. Like ripping off a bandage. “I’d banged my head on the way down and knocked over a little table. At first, I wasn’t completely with it. He started ripping at my clothes and touching me.”

  Her voice shook but she kept talking. “I grabbed the lamp that had fallen off the table and slammed it into his head. It stunned him enough that I was able to get away and hide in the bathroom.”

  “Did he rape you?” Quinn’s voice was small. Concerned. For her.

  She shook her head and he sighed in relief. “Thank God. You didn’t call the police.”

  Not a question but she answered it anyway. “I was seventeen. He told me it was my fault, that I’d asked for it and I was stupid enough to wonder if he was right, if somehow I’d done something to cause it. I’d caught him watching me a lot that summer but I didn’t encourage him. I was scared of him. Of his family’s money and power.”

  Quinn squeezed her hand. “I’m so damn sorry, Darby. He and I have never gotten along, not even when we were kids but I’m shocked he could do something so vile.

  Through his hand, she felt him shudder and she was finally able to look at him. Devastation. That’s the only word for what she could see in his eyes. Not censure or hate or loathing or any of the millions
of things she’d been worried about.

  Relief filled her and made her ache for him. She’d avoided the truth for years, avoided him. Telling him lightened her but it burdened him. She had to fix that. “It’s not you, Quinn. He’s not you.”

  His hands clenched and his jaw tightened. “He’s my goddamn brother. I should have known. I should have done something to stop him.”

  “No.” This she was sure about. “You’re not responsible for him. There was nothing you could have done then.” A shudder ran through her again and going with instinct, she moved into Quinn, wrapping herself around him and resting her head on his shoulder. “I’m so glad you were here today, though. I didn’t know what I was going to do. You saved me.”

  It took a long time before his body relaxed and he wrapped his arms around her. His movements were stiff but she finally felt safe and she let out a sigh of relief.

  Quinn kissed her hair and let out a shaky chuckle. “Looked to me like you were prepared to take care of yourself just fine. That was a nice move to disarm him.” He tightened his grip. “I’m so glad you weren’t hurt. I don’t know if I could have lived with that.” His hands ran over her back, offering comfort.

  Darby gripped him more tightly and tried to offer comfort of her own. It wasn’t too long before his movements on her body became more natural, more Quinn.

  “Where’d you go?” She tried to bite back the words but it was too late. She hadn’t planned on asking the question but now that she had, she needed to know.

  Once again, Quinn kissed her hair then rested his cheek on it. “I’m so sorry, Darby. If I could go back in time, I’d stay.” He sighed, left his cheek where it was. “I was incredibly pissed when I heard you’d been attacked. I was sure it was Philip even then. When I saw he’d kicked you, stood on your back, I completely lost it.”

  With another sigh, Quinn stepped back but kept her hands in his. “Come on, let’s get comfortable before I tell you the whole sordid mess.”

  He led her through the house and up to her room and straight to the chair they’d shared the previous night. He sat down then tugged her onto his lap. She leaned back onto the armrest and draped her legs over the other side.

  Quinn caressed her face then held both of her hands with his own. “This is where I screwed it up last night. This is what I should have told you.”

  He poured out his soul. Talked about his dysfunctional family, his lonely childhood and how his father had beat him the day he’d left. How he’d gone out on his own with exactly zero dollars and built up a business. How his family was hounding him to sign some papers he figured had to be shady. “I gave Dave the basics tonight, I’ll fill in the details with him tomorrow. Find out what the hell is going on.”

  Darby picked up his hand and kissed his palm, his wrist then his fingers one at a time. “You’ll figure it out, Quinn. That’s what you’ve always done, what you’ll always do.”

  He smiled at her softly and brought their joined hands to his lips. “I hope so.”

  Then he studied her with that intensity that could pin her to the spot, could make tingles appear in her most interesting places or compel her to trust him, to believe in him.

  At the moment it achieved all of those. Finally, he brushed his hand along her jaw. “How are you, Darby? How are you really?”

  So many things. “Still a little shaky.” Her breath hitched and she had to swallow. No tears. Not after a dry-eyed decade. She wasn’t crying when things were finally over.

  As always, Quinn knew. His thumb grazed over her cheekbone. “It’s okay to cry, Darby. There’s no shame in tears.”

  Maybe not but she wasn’t letting them fall. Not today. “I’m okay.” He raised an eyebrow and waited, compelling her to give her truth as well. “Okay so I’m not all the way okay, but I’m working at it. I feel safer, better about telling you.” She sighed and decided she had to go with the entire truth, just as he’d done for her. “I feel dirty. Where his hands touched me.” Her voice had dropped to a whisper and her eyes dropped from his.

  He pulled her into his chest and held her tightly. For long minutes, they sat wrapped in each other while he stroked her and kissed her hair. When both of their hearts had settled into a steady, even pace, he lifted her in his arms then walked into her bathroom. He set her on the counter, gave her a light kiss on the forehead then leaned in and turned on the shower. “I know it’s not that kind of dirty but I’m thinking it’ll help wash some of it away. I’ll be right outside, waiting. I’m not leaving, Darby.”

  He kissed her forehead one more time and held her close. When the steam started to cloud the room, he tapped her on the nose. “Think of me.” Then he started to walk out.

  No way.

  Darby reached out to snag his hand. He was right, it wasn’t that kind of dirty but the shower would help. As would Quinn. “I can do better than think of you.” He’d held her, touched her, comforted her. Kissed her on the forehead, on the hair. But he hadn’t kissed her. Not really.

  And she needed him to. Needed his touch to replace the other.

  Darby hopped down off the counter and moved into him, ran her hands up her shirt to cup his face. “Stay with me. Touch me.”

  His eyes showed conflict, guilt and worry. And desire. She hadn’t been sure she’d see it but it was there, with Quinn trying to bank it. She didn’t want it banked.

  “I’m not letting him have that much power over me again. I want you to wash away his touch, replace it with yours.”

  Still, he hesitated. “Are you sure?”

  In response, she reached up onto her toes and pulled him down to kiss him. With everything she had. In a heartbeat, he was kissing her back although she could feel his rigid control. He didn’t want to hurt her, didn’t want to push.

  If she hadn’t already been completely in love with this man, that would have done it right there. He put her needs ahead of his own. Always.

  “I’m sure.” Darby kept her eyes on his while she reached for the buttons on his shirt and slowly undid them. When he moved, it was to run his hands up her arms to her shoulders then to cup her face so gently, she felt her heart melt further.

  This man was so good so strong.

  “Touch me, Quinn. Make love to me. I want to remember you, only you.”

  QUINN held Darby tightly as their heartbeats slowed to a normal pace. She’d completely undone him. After divulging his family’s dark secrets, he’d expected her to walk away as quickly as she could. Instead, she’d walked right into him.

  In the shower, their lovemaking had been frantic. Hands and mouths greedy and desperate. They’d crashed together like two powerful flames who fed off each other to become bigger and stronger.

  They’d barely made it to the bed before their legs had collapsed beneath them.

  Darby’s fingers roamed his chest lazily and he wanted it to go on forever because this wasn’t a fling. It wasn’t temporary and he was going to do everything in his power to make it permanent.

  Would she have him?

  Darby kissed his chest, raised her head to look at him. “You tensed up there. You okay?” Her luminous eyes watched him warily. She still wasn’t sure of him.

  Too soon? “I’m good. You?”

  She nodded but didn’t look convinced.

  He thought of her Risk List and all the things she’d done because of it. It had brought them together, given them a chance. And maybe, just maybe, it could help him seal the deal.

  He slid out from under her and pinned her to the bed for a long kiss. When he lifted his head, her eyes were hazy with passion again. “Hold that thought, I’ll be right back.”

  He hopped out of bed then leaned back down when she started to rise. “Nope. Wait right there.” He kissed her until he felt her muscles melt again. “Right there. Don’t move a muscle, okay? I’ll only be a minute.”

  He grabbed his jeans and slid them on but didn’t bother to do them up. He turned to find Darby up on one elbow watching him. “I don’t think
I’ve ever seen anything sexier. Be right back.”

  Quinn flew down the stairs to the kitchen, grabbed what he needed, made a detour to the room he hadn’t slept in for days and flew back up.

  Darby had tossed a sheet over herself, covering up the view. It amazed him she could still be shy with him after all the things they’d done together. Although she might not trust her body yet might not realize how truly beautiful she was. Time to change that.

  “What are you hiding, Quinn?”

  He shrugged and came to sit beside her on the bed then put his finds on the floor behind him, where she couldn’t see. “All in good time, Darby.” When she tried to sit up and sneak a look, he took advantage and yanked down the sheet then pressed her back into the bed. “No peeking.”

  She laughed and twined her arms around his neck. “What are you planning on doing to distract me?”

  His entire body fired at her words and he shifted so he lay on top on her, trapping her in place with his legs. “I’ve still got plenty of ideas yet, no worries about running out for a long time.”

  Eyes sparkling with anticipation Darby leaned up to kiss him. “Glad to hear it and I’ve got a few of my own if you ever run out.”

  “Not in this lifetime.” After another kiss, Quinn leaned up on his elbows and ran his thumb over her lip. “I love you, Darby. With every last part of me.” Her eyes glimmered instantly with tears and she opened her mouth to respond but he pressed her lips with his thumb and pressed on. “I’m not like them. I’m me and I’ll do everything in my power to make you happy.” A tear slipped from her lashes and he kissed it away. “Forever, Darby. I want forever. You’re going to have to marry me.”

  Her tears faded as she laughed. “Is that a question? Because it didn’t sound much like a question.”

  Heart racing, he shifted to reach down and grab the box he’d gotten from his room. “You want a question, I’ll give you one.” He popped open the box as she gasped and struggled to sit up. “This is the ring my great-grandfather, the one I’m named after, gave to his bride. They were married for over fifty years, Darby. They were amazing. They worked hard, had a big family and loved well. I want that with you, honey. Will you marry me, Darby?”