Hate Me or Love Me

by Ella Miles

  “Thanks for your advice,” he says snarkily.

  “I know you are new to this, but that’s not how you thank someone.”

  I wait for him to say something but he doesn’t. So I take matters into my own hands.

  “Thank you, Mila, for getting here early, making sure my coffee and breakfast were sitting here waiting for me, and going above and beyond in your work,” I say in a deep voice mimicking his.

  Knight doesn’t even look up from his breakfast.

  “You’re welcome. If you have more tasks for me to complete today, please compile them and call me into your office or send me a detailed email, instead of calling me every five minutes,” I say in a higher pitched voice.

  I deepen my voice. “Of course, Mila. Oh, and here’s your advance.”

  Nothing. No response.

  I sigh, running my hand through my hair before shifting my weight in my heels. I wasn’t going to wear heels, but I couldn’t resist these sparkly Gucci heels that were in the closet. They match so perfectly with this light grey and blue dress. I’ve lined all of the outfits up for the next week in the order of my favorites so I ensure I can wear them all. It seems Knight and I decided to match today.

  Something catches my eye, and I turn my head toward the trashcan in the corner where a woman’s jacket lies on top.

  What is a woman’s jacket doing in the trash?

  It hits me quickly. That is why Knight wanted his office cleaned last night. He fucked someone in his office and didn’t want it to smell like sex this morning.

  I turn to leave but stop.

  “And please give me a heads up today if you are going to bring a woman into your office to fuck. My office is right next to yours. I don’t want to interrupt or overhear anything accidentally.”

  Knight’s head shoots up, and he stares at me for the first time this morning.

  “What makes you think that I would fuck someone in my office?”

  “Because you did last night.”

  He licks his lips and glances at the evidence in the trash. “I didn’t fuck anyone last night.”

  “Liar.”

  He rolls his eyes. “I thought we’ve been through this. I won’t lie to you.”

  “Why is there a woman’s jacket in the trash? Why did I have to hire an emergency cleaning crew to come in last night?”

  Knight takes a second and then slowly stands up and walks to me, but at the last second instead of touching me, he leans against his desk.

  “Abri left her jacket here. She has the strongest perfume in the world. I hate it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to stand to work in here this morning if the room wasn’t clean.”

  “Oh.”

  “And make sure you fire the cleaning crew. They should have taken the trash out along with cleaning.”

  I frown and walk over to the trash can to throw out the trash. I snatch the bag containing the jacket up and begin to storm out, but Knight blocks my path.

  He steals my breath with just a look. And I hate myself for letting him affect me so.

  “And just so you know, Mila. I don’t plan on fucking anyone in my office. Not unless you are offering. Why would I want anyone but my hot, sexy assistant?”

  “I’m not fucking you.”

  “I’ve already got you sleeping in my bed. You’ll be begging me to fuck you by the end of the week.”

  “I hate you.”

  “I know.”

  He’s right. If I keep letting him get to me like this, then I will do more than beg him to fuck me. I will jump him and let him fuck me here on his desk, no matter who hears.

  He moves out of my way, and I storm back to my office, determined to start thinking of him as nothing more than my asshole of a boss.

  My watch turns to seven in the evening. I’ve finished every task Knight has given me. I might get to do something fun this evening. Something to distract me from Knight. I should text Lana and see if she wants to go to a movie or get drinks with me tonight. I have a twenty dollar bill I can blow since Knight is providing me with food and a place to live.

  A knock on my door startles me.

  “Dammit, Knight. I finished everything you asked me to do; I’m going out.”

  The door opens. “Sorry, I’m not Knight. Well, I am but not the Knight you are thinking of. I promise not to put you to work.” A gorgeous woman says as she pokes her head into my office.

  I open my mouth, but no words come out.

  “I’m Abri Knight. I’m a partner here at Perfect Match. I thought I should introduce myself and give you some tips, so you don’t get fired on your first week.”

  She steps inside and closes the door behind her. She’s tall, slim, perfect. Her dress is tight, but not too tight for people to think of her as anything but professional. Her hair hangs in loose curls, and her makeup highlights her face instead of overwhelming it like it does when I wear makeup.

  “I’m Mila Burns. I’m uh…Mr. Knight’s newest assistant.”

  We shake hands cautiously, and it feels more like she’s sizing me up rather than being friendly.

  She takes a seat across from my desk without being invited to do so. I take a seat behind my desk.

  “How has your first couple days been?”

  “Um…”

  “That bad, huh?” She smiles. “Don’t worry; I wanted to quit my first week too. Ace can be intense, but he seems to like you. So maybe he’ll go easy on you and keep you around.”

  I shake my head. “Knight… I mean, Mr. Knight doesn’t like me. He just thinks I will be good at this job.”

  She studies me carefully. “Anyway, I know it’s only your second day here, so I’m sure you still have lots of work to finish, but I wanted to see if you wanted to take a break.”

  “Actually, I’ve finished for the day unless Mr. Knight adds any more tasks.”

  “You are the best assistant he’s hired, then. Well, since me.” She smiles. “You want to go work out with me then?”

  “Um…I was going to go meet a friend for a drink.”

  “We can do that afterward. Earn our drinks.” Damn Abri and her perfect fit body and tight ass. My rail-thin frame with no muscles can’t compete with hers. I’m a stick; she’s a goddess.

  “I don’t think—”

  “I won’t take no for an answer. Besides you may need me to defend you to Ace for leaving early on your second day whether you finished the work or not.” She winks at me like we are best friends.

  “I don’t think Mr. Knight would mind.”

  She walks over to me and hooks her arm in mine. “He would. Trust me; you don’t want to get on his bad side.”

  She yanks me up. Her body is much stronger than mine.

  “You can call him Ace you know. He hates being called mister.”

  I nod. “I know, but I prefer to call him Knight. Sometimes, asshole.”

  She smiles at that as she drags me out of my office.

  Knight’s door opens like he was coming to talk to me, but stops when he sees us together.

  “Oh Ace, you won’t mind if I steal your assistant away. She finished all her work for the day.”

  Knight’s face tenses, his jaw thins, and I know he wants to tell her no.

  “It’s up to Mila, what she wants to do.”

  I look at him, but he isn’t looking at me, he’s looking at Abri. I can’t find any sign if he wants me to get close to Abri or not. I don’t want to go with Abri, but if I go with her, I might be able to learn more about Knight. Why they broke up and what he has planned for me to do to help him.

  “Do you have anything else you need from me? If not, I’d like to go with Abri.”

  Knight’s jaw twinges.

  “Yay, I’m so excited to have a new friend,” Abri exclaims, not giving Knight a chance to answer as she drags me toward the elevators. I don’t look back at Knight. I know that scowl on his face and the pain in his eyes. He doesn’t want me to go. But I need to figure out why.

  I regret my decision im
mediately. “I thought you said we were going to the gym, Abri.”

  “No, I said we were going to work out. What fun is going to the gym?”

  “Um, it’s safe and air-conditioned.”

  “Where is your sense of adventure? Nothing fun will ever happen to you running on a treadmill.”

  She opens the back of her jeep, one of the last cars this well-dressed woman should be driving. She changed into a sports bra and leggings, while I’m wearing a T-shirt with the arms cut out and shorts. I’m not prepared for this.

  “Grab the ropes,” Abri says swinging a bag over her shoulder.

  I grab the ropes and stare up at the massive mountain we are climbing. I can’t do this, but I’m not backing down.

  Abri starts setting up the equipment. And every time she opens her mouth, I think I’ve heard it before. I’m missing something. She’s familiar, but not too familiar. I may have met her before, but only in passing. And after the entire twenty minutes I’ve known her, I don’t know whether I like her or hate her.

  “Have you climbed before?”

  I frown. “No.” This feels like a competition. Like I should be able to do anything she can do. Which is silly. We aren’t competing for Knight. He’s her ex, and I’m his assistant. We can be friends.

  “No worries, this one is an easy climb. We will do it together, and Jamal and Blake will spot us.”

  Two men arrive as Abri says their names. Both attractive men are going to watch me fall on my face. Abri gives me a very quick tutorial about the equipment and then we are strapped in and slowly climbing up with the men spotting us from the ground.

  “So how did you and Knight meet?” I ask trying to seem interested.

  She smiles. “I’m not sure I can get used to hearing someone call him Knight.”

  “Sorry, I mean Ace.”

  “We met in high school. He was the popular football player. I was the prom queen, cheerleader type. We fell in love and started a company together. Next thing you know we are married and running a million dollar company together.”

  “That’s incredible.”

  “It was a fairy tale come true.”

  “I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”

  She pauses, and I have to move my handhold higher to get even with her again. That’s when I see the tears staining her cheeks.

  “I’m sorry. You two seemed perfect for each other. But sometimes, things don’t work out.”

  Abri shakes her head and releases her hold on the rock, which completely freaks me out. Even though we are connected to ropes, I’m still petrified at any moment we are going to slam into the rocks below.

  She climbs higher, not speaking to me, and I do my best to keep up, although at a slower pace. Finally, she stops again and looks at me, her eyes almost dry.

  “I know I’m the ex, and you and Ace are keeping things professional, but I feel now that we are friends, I should tell you the truth. That way you can make your own decisions about Ace. I don’t want you to fall for him like all the rest of his assistants and end up hurt.”

  I suck in a breath, not sure if I want to hear what she says. And I’m definitely sure we aren’t friends.

  “We were in love. We had passion. We were everything to each other. But then…”

  “Abri? What happened?”

  “We were too passionate about everything. The love turned to constant fighting.”

  I nod, understanding.

  “The bickering turned to physical fighting. Ace has a temper, and he…”

  More tears fall, and I need to know what happened. I need to know how he hurt her. I need to know the truth.

  “Abri? Please tell me.”

  “He hit me. Hard across the face. And then…” Her voice trembles. “Then, he hit me until I passed out.”

  I gasp. I know it’s not what she needs, but I can’t help myself. It doesn’t fit what I know about Knight. But then maybe the Knight I know and the Ace she knows aren’t the same people.

  I want to say I’m sorry, but my words would be empty, meaningless.

  “I’m sorry,” she says. “I need to go.”

  “What?”

  She quickly descends. I stare in awe at how quickly she moved down the side of the cliff. She detaches herself from the rope and runs to her car. Both men chase after her, most likely worried and wanting to hit on her.

  Shit, both men!

  I look down at high up I am. I’m gripping the wall tightly. And I can’t repel down like her; I have no one belaying me. I have to climb down. My legs are suddenly jello, and my hands are sweating as I try to grip the rock. I’m high enough up I’m sure if I fell I would die or at the very least break several bones.

  My entire body is shaking now. I need help.

  “Abri! Help!”

  Nothing.

  “Help! Someone, please help!”

  The wind blows, and I grip the rock tighter. That bitch. The longer I’m up here, the more I replay the conversation in my head. Some of it might be true, all of it even. But the way she spoke, waited until we had reached the top before climbing down makes me believe she deliberately trapped me up here.

  I shake my head. Now I’m just paranoid. I can do this. I’m not that high up.

  But I try to move my foot lower, and it slips.

  Shit. I can’t do this. I’m going to die.

  “Mila?”

  I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Knight.

  “My knight in shining armor, coming to save me again,” I say nervously.

  “I can leave if you prefer.”

  “No! I need your help.”

  I swear I hear him chuckle, but I don’t look down to know for sure.

  “I need you to let go, Mila.”

  “What? I’m not letting go. I’ll die if I let go.”

  Now I know he’s laughing, but it’s an anxious laugh.

  “Look down.”

  I hesitantly do and see him holding the rope.

  “I got you. You aren’t going to die.”

  “I can’t let go.”

  “I can come up, but then no one will be belaying you. You’re safer if I’m here, supporting you.”

  I take a deep breath. He’s right.

  “Trust me; I’ve got you.”

  His words again. Dammit.

  I slowly let go and grab the rope as he carefully lowers me down. When I almost reach the ground, he cradles me in his arms as I start bawling.

  “Shh, you’re okay. I’ve got you. I won’t let you go.”

  It doesn’t stop my bawling.

  “How did you know where to find me?”

  He wipes my eyes as my tears begin to slow. “There is a reason most of my assistants quit. Abri is a bitch. You especially threaten her, so I knew she’d up her game.”

  “I could have died. You saved me. You’re always saving me.”

  “No, if it weren’t for me she wouldn’t have pulled this crap in the first place.”

  “Oh my god, Mila. I didn’t realize you were still up on the mountain. I’m so glad you are okay,” Abri says running up behind us.

  Knight’s body stills, holding me tighter against him like he’s a shield between Abri and me.

  “Just leave, Abri.”

  “I need to apologize. I was just a wreck after I told her how we broke up. I thought Blake tied the rope up before he left. You were perfectly safe.”

  “Go, Abri.”

  “I need to talk to you first, Ace. We need to talk about our meeting tomorrow and—”

  I can’t listen to her talk one more second.

  I know Knight doesn’t want anything fake to happen between us. He doesn’t want me to make Abri jealous, but there is nothing fake about what I do.

  I grab Knight’s neck and kiss him firmly on the lips, letting my tongue slip into his mouth. He tastes my desperation and terror and pulls me further in showing me how horrified he was in return at seeing me on top of a rock and unable to get down. Our hands tangle in each other’s cl
othes, and I know this isn’t going to end here. Once we get home, this is going a lot further. Neither of us will be able to stop.

  Abri said passion turned to love and then hate. Our hate turned to fear and desperation.

  I don’t know if Knight did all of those horrible things to Abri or not. I know if I asked him, he would tell me the truth. But I can’t ask. Not now. I need to find out my own truth. Ace may have treated Abri like shit, but Knight is my savior. I just hope my knight doesn’t turn back into the asshole I thought he was this whole time.

  12

  Knight

  Mila’s kiss knocked all of the air out of me. It took me completely off guard. It suffocated me and set me free at the same time.

  I didn’t think I would ever taste her again. I thought that ship had sailed after the way I treated her. I thought her hate for me was stronger than any desire she felt.

  I’ve never been happier to be proven wrong.

  “If we didn’t have an audience, I would fuck you against the rocks right here,” I whisper against her ear.

  She blushes and bites her lip. “I have no objections.”

  Now I’m biting my lip, trying to hold back from fucking her into oblivion, while Abri and her boy toys watch. As much as I want to fuck Mila, I’m torn. Because I want to kill Abri just as much.

  I tried to downplay how unsafe it was for Mila. Abri claimed Blake tied the rope off when he abandoned Mila, but the rope wasn’t tied up. It was dangling freely in the air as Mila clutched to the face of a steep rock over a hundred feet up.

  One wrong move and Mila would have fallen. To her death, most likely. Abri could have killed Mila.

  I don’t know if what Abri did was intentional or not, but I want to hurt Abri all the same for what she did to Mila.

  I’ve never been so terrified. I’ve looked death in the face before. I’ve been helpless before, but this was different. Mila could have died because of me. That guilt would have never left me, and the pain of losing a woman I wanted, but who was never really mine, would have gutted me.