by Jade Oliver
My mood quickly turns from playful to pensive. But Toby, being Toby, knows just what to do. I feel the cold water hit me from behind and I scream at the impact, dropping the clothes and blanket to the ground. I whip around and glare at him. “Toby, you are going to get the clothes wet.”
He eyes me from head to toe and my breath catches as I look at him. Lost in my thoughts, I didn’t see him undress, and he now stands in the water completely nude. His body glistens as the water drips down the tightness of his long, lean muscles. My eyes trace over his abs on display, then down to the sexy v-line of his hips and finally to the promised land. His body responds to my appraisal, and I watch as he hardens and swells more with every sweep of my eyes. I somehow have enough brain power to spread the blanket.
I strip off my clothes as I walk to him, only keeping my tank top in my hand, and step into the cold water that does nothing to cool me down. Stretching up, I breathlessly whisper in his ear, “Don’t move.” I slowly move my body down the length of his body, close enough that he can feel the air move around him but not close enough to touch. Crouching down, I dip my tank top in the water to get it wet before I teasingly bring myself back up. I make sure he feels my breath against him. Once I am standing, I move around behind him.
I ring the wetness of the tank over his head several times, my fingers working his scalp in between, admiring the water running down his delicious body. I take my time to thoroughly wash and feel every muscle and line of his back, his ass, and the length of his legs before moving to his front. Next, I gently, lovingly wash his face. His trust in me is so complete that he stands still, never moving from his spot.
But he isn’t unaffected by my touch. Every sucked in breath of air, every groan and moan from him propels my desire. I become bolder with each swipe of the cloth. Every time I rinse out the tank I come dangerously close to his hardness. As I run the cloth over his strong pecs I gently squeeze his hardened nipples.
His moan encourages me, and I squeeze harder causing his mouth to open and his eyes to bore into mine. I can clearly see his devotion and desire that must be equally present in mine. My hands and the cloth roam every inch of him. I tease as I bypass his cock to rub down his legs noting the strength and power of him. He is manly in a way most overlook beyond the surface. They see his flirty side and assume he is a playboy, but I have seen the real him and it is time I let him see me.
Finally, I finish washing him and sit in the shallowest part of the creek, deep enough to wash off but shallow enough for him to see all parts of me as I lie back. Fuck this is cold. But, in all honesty, it feels good against my overheated skin. I arch my back to allow my head to dip into the water and wet my hair but keep my eyes on Toby’s face to watch how he reacts.
Toby stands there devouring me with his heated gaze. His eyes roam my body as I put it on display for him. I reach up to wash the egg from my hair. My nipples are diamond hard peaks from the cold water, and his intense gaze watches me. Satisfied I am clean enough, I grab the tank I left beside me on a rock to keep it from disappearing into the current.
I bring the cloth to my skin, allowing the excess water to cascade down my chest. Running the cloth against my breasts, I pause when I reach my right nipple and tweak it, moaning at the pressure, at the small relief of finally being touched. I move to the other side to do the same. Toby’s jaw clenches, and he looks like he is using every ounce of his control not to interfere, which makes me wonder how long it will take to snap it.
I trail the tank down my stomach and finally between my legs. My gaze locks with Toby’s, his powder blue eyes dark with need. I drop the tank not caring where it ends up. My finger slides through my wet folds as I spread my legs as far as I can. Toby’s stare drops, and I see his breathing stop as he watches my hand. Stopping on my clit, I circle it slowly intending to tease him and myself. I close my eyes and a loud moan escapes as I circle harder.
Toby’s voice is husky when he speaks. “I am imagining how wet you are for me. How much that tight little pussy craves my cock. Push your fingers inside and show me how much you want me.”
Oh. My. God. This man is going to be the death of me. I comply with the command and push two of my right fingers inside. “Fuck, Toby,” I cry out, and I lift my hips from the water as I pull my fingers from my wet heat. They glisten before us, evidence of how much I want him. How much I need him.
His composure snaps. He strides the short distance to me, scoops me into his arms, and carries me out of the water. As he takes my right hand into his, he looks directly at me as he brings my coated fingers to his mouth and sucks every bit of me from them. It’s my turn to lose my breath. All I can manage to croak out is, “Please, Toby.”
His mouth crashes into mine as we sink onto the blanket. He pulls me fully under his body and supports himself over me in a push up position. I’m not sure what overtakes me, but I turn my head and bite his bicep before licking the mark. “Bloody hell, Adair,” he grunts before dropping to his knees and lowering his mouth to lick and kiss a trail from my neck to my hips.
With a chuckle that belongs only to him, part sexy and part nervous, he murmurs against my lower stomach, “You washed me, my love, it is only fair I make sure you didn’t miss any spots on yourself.” He dips his head towards my core, and just when I think he is going to finally extinguish the ache, he teases me with sensual kisses down my leg, stopping to give my ankle a sexy nibble.
Who knew the ankle could feel so fucking erotic. What can this man not do? Before my thoughts can run away from me, I feel his warm, wet tongue tracing the inside of my leg. He starts alternating his kisses with licks. I giggle when he teases behind my knees, but I lay my head back and submit to Toby. I trust him fully with my body and my pleasure.
By the time Toby’s mouth reaches my upper thigh, I feel like he has teased me forever. But he finally hovers between my legs where I want him the most. His fingers spread my lips apart, his breath warm and heavy against me. “I told you Adair, I am coming to terms with your lingering feelings for Brax and the glimpses of connection I have seen with the others without allowing doubt for what we have. But, right now, this moment is ours and ours alone.”
My need to feel his mouth on my pussy is overwhelming. “Yes, Toby. You and only…”
The feel of his warm mouth on my needy clit stop my words as his fingers tease my entrance. I groan in protest as he pulls from my clit with a pop. I fist the blanket and squeeze my legs against his head in a vice grip to try and bring his mouth back to me.
He pulls his fingers from me causing my legs to fall open, and his hand smooths over the softness of my belly locking me in place. Toby’s tongue licks me up and down a few times before dipping inside me, pushing in as far as he can go before pulling out, over and over.
His tongue, fuck, is magical.
I whine when he pulls out after such a short time. He licks back up to my clit, lapping at me, his movements the perfect pattern and pressure against me. Toby’s fingers are back, but this time they don’t taunt me. He pushes straight in and relentlessly gives my body just what it needs.
“Oh god, Toby. Please. Right there. Ohhhh. Don’t stop. Fuck, please don’t stop,” I encourage. His mouth and fingers keep thrusting and licking, working me until I break. True to Toby’s words, I come so hard I forget my own name.
He kisses up my body, allowing me to catch my breath, as he hovers over me. “Please Toby, I need more. Now.” Our eyes lock as he, ever so slowly, lowers his body onto mine and rubs his hard cock against my wetness but doesn’t enter me. I want to both scream and enjoy his tease.
His hips move in a slow rhythm pulling his erection through my wetness and up between my lips to glide over my sensitive clit. Passionate kisses show his hunger, and I can taste my essence on his lips. His need matches my own. Just when I think I can’t take any more, he thrusts into me, and every inch of him is surrounded by my tight, wet heat.
I am stretched beyond my limit, a little pain mixed in the pleasure, but
it feels so damn good. My fingernails dig into his shoulders before I trail them down his back causing him to whimper and jerk. Toby leisurely thrusts his cock in and out of me.
He is trying to kill me. I try to move my hips to encourage him to speed up, but he has me pinned. He continues to rock into me as he kisses down my neck and back up to my lips. Our mouths collide in a kiss that fills and shatters my heart. Every ounce of emotion he feels he conveys with his lips and tongue. Desire. Devotion. Love. His hand cups my face and he pulls away, his eyes locked with mine.
Before he can say anything, I whisper, “I know. Me too.”
At my words, he briefly pauses before his pace speeds up until he is powering into me. His rough side is as perfect as his sweet, and I am lost to him. He moves even harder, pressing me against the ground and his body against my clit.
This man. Fuck.
Toby chuckles through his pants and moans. “This man what, my love?”
And I have done it again, damn. He takes my mouth once more, pumps into me even harder, and cuts off the wandering thoughts brewing in my head. I moan against his mouth as he moans against mine. I am so close. When I feel him tense I know he is too. He changes his movement slightly, causing him to drag tighter against my clit with his forward and back movements. He barely pulls out before he slams back in.
My muscles tighten against him with my release, which causes him to push harder as my pussy tightens its grip on his cock. His thrusts become more urgent as his body is lost to his impending orgasm. He grows thicker right before he starts to spill inside me. The feeling of his come filling me pushes me over the edge for a second time, and my body convulses at the power of my pleasure. Electricity spreads throughout me, and I am blissed to the point that I can do nothing but feel.
When I finally regain my senses, Toby is frozen above me, staring at me, and appears mesmerized by what he sees. I feel self-conscious, so I bring my hands up to hide my face.
He manages to lie down next to me and roll me to his side all at once. Pulling my hands from his face, he looks at me with a serious expression on his gorgeous face. Still slightly breathless he tells me, “Adair, love. You are the most beautiful creature I have ever had the chance to make love to. When I saw you come, to have you fall apart from the pleasure I gave you, my world made sense. In that moment I realized I would do anything to keep giving you that. To keep giving you smiles and laughter. I am yours and will be happy as long as you are letting me in no matter how it looks to society. I can be open to you exploring what you need with the others. I know what you give me is mine, real, and we can be us while being part of something bigger.”
I start to interrupt, but Toby stops me. “I need to get this out. You aren’t being honest with yourself. I hate that you feel torn inside. I hate you feel you have to hide that you have a growing connection with Thad. That you have not and might not want to let go of your feelings for that wanker, Brax. I have even seen the glances you give Jasper. You might only want his friendship, but you are still curious there might be more.
“I would take you as my own and love you until time ceases to exist, no matter what century we are in, but I will not sacrifice you for my pride. You need more. I know it in my gut, my mind, and in my heart, even if you have yet to decide. Know that I am here and I am not going anywhere, even when you need to follow your heart in other directions. You have enough for us all, my love. You…”
My mouth cuts off his speech and I try to tell him with my kiss how I will try to be worthy of the love and trust he has placed in me. My heart squeezes and my head buzzes trying to process his words. With his freaky way of knowing what I need - some quiet, processing time alone - he leaves me and walks to the creek.
Luckily, my tank top caught on a rock not far away and he grabs it to clean himself before rinsing and wringing it out lightly. He makes his way back to me and cleans me between my legs in an intimate gesture. When he walks back to the creek again, I lie back and admire his body and how his lean muscles tighten with each step. He rinses my tank back out along with the rest of the dirty clothes we discarded without care.
Bringing over the wet clothes and hiking boots, he makes use of the large log branch we have been using as a bridge. Toby hands me Thad’s shirt, and I cannot help but note the irony in Toby’s words to me. The shirt swallows me but does little to hide me through its thin transparency.
Toby grunts before handing me the weird pants. “Cover yourself, I will manage in these love.”
Before I can argue, his wet shorts are over his hips being buttoned and zipped. I pull the pants up, laughing loudly when they come up above my breasts. I fumble with ties and flaps and all sorts of I don’t knows, until I manage to get them tight enough not to fall. Once my boots are on, I stand. I look ridiculous, but somehow Toby still looks at me as if I am beautiful.
Toby wraps the wet clothes up in the blanket, slings it over his shoulder to carry, and grabs my hand to lead me back to the farm. I can’t help but feel a twinge of sadness as we leave our bubble. When we are back at the farm, I’ll be forced to face my growing feelings for the others and uncertainty over the future.
Out of the blue, Toby looks at me with wide eyes. “Fuck, Adair. We didn’t use a condom.”
I panic for a half second then my mind clears and I relax my shoulders that had tensed. “No worries, I have an implant in my arm. I got it before we left, when I started seeing Brax. I hoped I would be chosen for the study, and I didn’t want to worry about keeping up with pills when I knew we’d have to camp and stuff.”
Toby looks at me in relief. “So, do you think that arm thingy works here in the past?”
I suppress my groan as I answer, “God, I hope so. I don’t really see why it wouldn’t.” And with that, we continue our journey back in satisfied silence.
Seventeen
June 7th, 1785
Day 4 (Past)
Dear Diary,
This is my first journal entry since arriving here in the past. Jasper surprised me with a new journal after I mentioned I lost mine. He is so sweet. I don’t get to talk with him as much as I’d like. Except when he showed me the garden and when I see him at breakfast there haven’t been many opportunities to spend time together. I just know we are going to have a very close friendship, so it’s hard to keep myself from pushing too hard, too fast.
It’s more than a bit crazy that I feel so connected to Jasper and to Thad already.
Toby has been my rock. Why I waited so long to admit to us both how I feel is beyond me. I hate to admit it, but I know part of it is because I met Toby the day Brax left me. Not to mention how strange it is to have such an instant connection with someone. And now it’s happening again, but Toby said he won’t make me choose! I’ll process that later when I’m more ready because seriously, wow!
My love for Toby feels different than anything I’ve ever felt. Which makes my need to explore my relationships with the others even more… I can’t even figure out the right word for my muddled thoughts. My feelings for each man are so different but no less intense from the other. Even what I feel — ugh, felt; no fuck, feel — for Brax.
It’s so freaking frustrating!
I am starting to face the fact that I’m not over Brax, and I still think of him more than I should. I dreamt of us last night. His quest to give me the experiences I never got as a child ensured he is firmly rooted inside my thoughts and memories along with the event itself. He helped heal one part of me only to rip another part open.
The dream was so vivid. As I think of it now it takes me back to that moment. It was the moment I knew I had fallen in love with Brax.
Brax took me to the fair, something else I never got to experience in my youth. All night, he only had eyes for me. We stole touches and gentle kisses while we rushed from ride to ride, like little kids. We ate whatever we wanted — like funnel cake and fried Oreos. We saved the Ferris Wheel for last. He knew I wanted to see the world and tried to provide it for me in the only way h
e could at the time.
When we reached the top and the ride stopped to allow more riders on below, it gave us a moment to enjoy the breathtaking view under the dark, starry sky. I turned to him smiling and his face glowed with his love (even if he wasn’t ready to say it yet) and how exceptionally happy he was in that moment. I wondered if he could see on my face just how much this moment meant to me.
He cupped my face and gave me a gentle kiss, whispering, "Here’s the world, beautiful. Now, what are you going to do with it?" My heart stopped and I knew I had fallen in love for the first time in my life.
Damn. Why does it still hurt so bad to think of letting go? Ugh! Enough of that!!!
Back to Toby, he is amazing. He made me take a more honest look at myself and my wants and needs. What he said to me after we made love. His exact words were, “You have enough for us all, my love.” Those words I’ll never forget. How can I? He basically told me that no matter how I feel about the others, including Brax, he’ll never leave me.
But could he actually let another touch me? Love me? If you would have asked me a month and a half ago I would have answered, get real, but now… Now it all feels so different. It feels like I have this pull to several men at once. Which is crazy, right? Especially since I know I am madly in love with Toby. My heart… well it seems to have a place in the present and the past with him firmly planted in both.
The other man to intrude on so many of my thoughts is Thad. He really can be such an ass, but he hides his pain behind his brashness, and I suspect he has been holding himself back for a long, long time.
For some reason he seems afraid to live. I overheard him and Jasper talking a few times and I gathered he has a deep secret. Something he tries not to think about and never talks about but caused this irrational need in me for him to open up. To trust me. It’s an urgent, unsettling feeling.