Sisters in Bloom

by Melissa Foster

  “The sock,” was all Kaylie said.

  “It’s Max’s. When you didn’t call, I went to Taylor’s Cove for a drink. For several drinks, actually. I didn’t know Max was there, but she was, and thank God; I was in no shape to drive. She drove me home and stayed on the couch, since we needed to be on the red-eye. Kaylie, there’s no woman in the world who could replace you. The moment I found you, I knew I’d never look at another woman.”

  Kaylie sniffled. “I do trust you.”

  “Do you?” Chaz held his breath.

  “Yes. I just…I’m so up and down all the time right now, and I came home and found those things…and” —he heard the strain in her voice— “I don’t want to be my mom. I don’t want to be home with kids while you’re out living your life—or starting a new one—just to be left in the dust like some used up piece of trash.” Someone yelled in the background. “Hold on, Alex,” Kaylie called out.

  Chaz lowered his hand to his eyes. “Is that what this is, Kay? You’re worried that I’ll do what your father did?” Relief swept through him. She didn’t distrust just him. She probably didn’t trust any man. Chaz knew three things about himself. When his father died, he learned that he had a hidden strength that he could call upon to get him through the toughest of times. He’d never let the festival perish because it was built by his father. And he was not just any man. “I will spend the rest of my life doing everything I can to prove to you that you can trust me. There is not, has never been, and will never be another woman in my life besides you.”

  Kaylie’s voice softened, “And Max.”

  Chaz smiled. “And Max. And our daughter if we have one.”

  Alex yelled again. Kaylie let out a loud breath. “I have to go. I’m at practice. I’m writing songs. You were right. I can do more than sing, and I’m really, really good at it.”

  “I’m so proud of you,” Chaz said.

  “I love you.”

  He felt the noose around his neck loosen. “I love you, too, Kaylie, and I always will.”

  “Will you be back by the weekend? I’m singing at Danica’s event this weekend.”

  “I will be back tomorrow, and, Kaylie...”

  “Yeah?”

  “I’m sorry, and can we promise never to jump to conclusions again? Either of us? This week was so hard.”

  “Promise.”

  Chaz felt the strangulation of the noose fall away, and for the first time in the last few days, he was finally able to breathe.

  Chapter Thirty

  The center bustled with energy. Teens were hanging out in the lobby, and adults mingled among themselves, discussing who was attending the weekend event and how excited they were for their kids to finally have a place to congregate. Danica followed a trail of laughter toward the basketball courts in search of Gage. She found him teaching a young boy how to dribble. She leaned against the doorway, listening to the thumping rhythm of the ball on the court floor and watching his easy, comfortable nature.

  Gage caught sight of her. “Hey, buddy,” he said to the boy. “Why don’t you practice for a bit, and I'll be right back.”

  He watched the boy find a rhythm and then went to Danica. “What’s up?”

  “I’m just nervous. Do you have everything set for this weekend?”

  “I’ve got it covered, and Sally and I met for coffee this morning before work and went over all the details for Kaylie’s band, the tables for outside, the colorful lights you love. I think we have it all under control.”

  “Good.”

  “Danica, are you okay? You do remember talking to me earlier, right? I called, you answered, and I filled you in?”

  Her mind had been like a sieve ever since Blake asked her to marry him. Every speck of her wanted to marry Blake, and yet she still held back because of Kaylie. “Yeah, I know,” she lied. She’d forgotten until he’d just mentioned it. “I’m just making sure.”

  Gage put his strong hand on her shoulder and squeezed gently. “Danica, we’ve got your back. Really, it’s gonna be great.”

  Danica turned and saw Sally standing at the end of the hall. Their eyes locked, and Sally turned and headed in the opposite direction. “Thank you. I’m gonna catch up with Sally.”

  She found Sally in her office, standing with her back against the wall. “What was that hasty retreat all about?” she asked.

  Sally’s face flushed.

  “Sally? Is there something I should know?”

  Sally licked her lips and reached for a chair. “We had coffee,” she said.

  “Yeah, okay.”

  Sally leaned forward. “It felt more like a date.” She grabbed Danica’s arm. “Is that weird? Lame? I mean, I haven’t dated in years, and I work with him, and I don’t even know if it was a date.”

  “Breathe, Sally. First of all, it was coffee. Before work. That could be a date, I guess, but it could be just an efficient way to cover the details of the event. How did he ask you? All flirty, like, Hey, baby, or normal? Like, Hey, I’ve got an idea?”

  “Somewhere in between, maybe? Last night before we left he said, ‘Let’s go over the specs tomorrow before work. Café Duo.’”

  “Okay, well, that doesn’t really sound like a date. Do you want it to have been one?”

  Sally groaned. “I don’t know. I feel guilty. Dave isn’t even dead a year yet, and my heart is fluttering every time I see this guy. Maybe I should quit.”

  “Oh, no you don’t.” Danica crossed her arms and sat back. “Just let it be. See what develops.”

  “I can’t even think when he’s around,” Sally confessed.

  “Then you’re crushing something bad. You should have seen me when I met Blake.”

  “Really? Because I can’t remember it being like that with Dave. We were so young, and it all happened so fast. Our lives just sort of became one, without any drama or butterflies, or anything.”

  Danica felt strangely like a therapist once again. “Sometimes love is like that, too. What you and Dave had was special. No one, and nothing, can take that away. And if this was a date, then maybe that’s okay. I think Dave would want you to be happy.”

  Sally smirked. “Right.”

  “He would. Just be yourself, and see what happens. Maybe you misread it, maybe you didn’t.”

  “What if this messes with our jobs?” Sally asked.

  Danica thought about an office romance, and in the end, she went with her gut reaction. “You know, if this really is something strong between you two, or if it has the potential to be, then I would never stand in your way. We can deal with anything that comes up with work. You guys are adults. It’s not like I’ll find you going at it in the closet. Will I?”

  “My goodness, no! But how can I keep from making a fool of myself?”

  “Your heart controls the foolish button, and nothing I can say will make any difference.” She thought of the night she and Blake first kissed and how her legs had felt numb. She’d thought she might fall down right then and there. And then they’d kissed, and in that instant, that shared heartbeat of a moment, her life had transformed.

  “Okay, so I’ll be a babbling idiot.” Sally laughed.

  Danica shrugged. “There are worse things than crushing on a guy.” Like not accepting a marriage proposal from the man you love. She changed the subject to safer territory. “Gage said you have everything under control for Kaylie and the band.”

  “Yeah, I do, but I can’t believe she’s going to sing. She’s three weeks from her due date. The strain of a big event can’t be good for her.”

  “She needs it. She’s been really down, and this will cheer her up. You’re coming to the baby shower, right? The weekend after the event?”

  “I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Speaking of which, your mom called. She said she had a feeling that something was up with you but didn’t want to be a pest.”

  “She called you?”

  “She called the center to reach you. She said she didn’t want to keep calling your cell
because she didn’t want to pressure you to call her back, so she said to just tell you she called and if you have time, to call her back. She’s so sweet.”

  Danica would call her mother a lot of things—submissive, organized, loving—but sweet wasn’t a word she would have chosen. Her mother was supportive in a strong way, not a syrupy sweet, coddling way. Realization dawned on Danica. “Oh my God. I’m turning into my mother.”

  “What?”

  Danica hadn’t realized she said it out loud. Kaylie was sweet, and God only knew where she learned it, but Danica was practical, efficient. She said things as she saw them, without sugarcoating them, as she’d done with Blake. The problem was, she didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

  Sally stood to leave. “Listen, there are worse things than turning into your mother, trust me. Thanks for the sanity break,” she said, and left Danica’s office.

  Danica picked up the phone and dialed her mother’s number.

  They sat outside at the Mountain Ridge Restaurant, midway between the town where her mother lived and Allure. The sun was warm, but a gentle breeze kept them comfortable beneath the table’s umbrella. Danica watched her mother eat her salad. She’d never noticed how she patted her mouth with a napkin after every bite, or the way she chewed with her lips firmly closed. There were tiny lines around her mother’s upper lip, and the veins in her hands were more prominent than Danica remembered. It occurred to her that she hadn’t ever noticed much about her mother other than the insignificant things she’d noticed as a child and carried into adulthood; she could be annoying at times, was always supportive, and appeared to never be unavailable to her children. It saddened Danica to think that she’d almost made it to her thirtieth birthday without really getting to know her mother. She’d wasted years treating her like her mother, at worst an inconvenience, but at best, something far different from a friend.

  “Mom, I miss you,” Danica said honestly.

  Her mother smiled. “Well, I miss you too, honey. Is everything okay?”

  She was happy with the typical motherly response, but Danica wanted more. She wanted to know her mother. What made her happy and sad, what her new hopes and dreams were—if she had any. She did want to know all those things, but if she was honest with herself, what she really wanted to know was how her mother knew her father was the right person for her to marry—even if he turned out not to be.

  “Yeah, it’s fine. I just feel like I don’t know you very well.”

  She put her fork down and cocked her head. “Honey, tell me what you want to know. I have nothing to hide.”

  “It’s not that, Mom. It’s just that I’m almost thirty, and I still see you as I did when I was a kid. There’s so much about you that I don’t know, and for so long, I thought you were just…”

  “A taskmaster? Know-it-all? Busybody?”

  “No,” Danica lied.

  “It’s okay, Danica. I’m your mother, and I’m supposed to be all those things.”

  “But why didn’t you ever correct me, or tell me it wasn’t true. I mean we’ve spent months hardly ever seeing each other. I know it’s my fault, but you’re my mom. You should have pushed me, come into my life more. I’m not blaming you. It’s my fault, but why did you just let it happen?”

  “Oh, honey, you learn something when you have children. You learn a lot of things—about yourself, and about them. It was my place to raise you, and to make sure you turned out okay, or at least give you every opportunity to do so. But it’s not your job to love me for it, or to even like me as a person.”

  “But I do like you,” Danica said emphatically.

  “Well, that’s good, but you shouldn’t feel guilty if you have moments when you don’t. A mother knows her children love her, even when they claim they don’t, but I don’t think I need to force myself into your life. I’m here for you when you want to spend time with me, and I’m okay when you don’t.”

  How can I not have seen that strength in my mother before? She’d advised her clients of their roles as parents all the time. Why did she see her mother’s role—or her own—as anything different? She sighed, then fiddled with her napkin. “Can you tell me something about yourself?”

  Her mother smiled, as if Danica’s question was silly. “I’m really not very interesting.”

  “Please?”

  She looked up at the sky, the parking lot, then around at the patrons sitting at nearby tables. “I love wildflowers,” she said finally. “I love the randomness of them, the vibrant colors and the way they grow without being planted each year.”

  “Me too. I love that!” Baby steps, Danica told herself. “What else?”

  “I was surprised to find that I like bridge, and I don’t like my red hair, and I love going to the gym, but not to exercise. I love the time with my girlfriends.” Her mother looked thoughtfully at Danica. “That’s something you should do, spend more time with girlfriends. I spent so many years taking care of everyone else that I lost all my friends and had to start over after—” Her unsaid words hung in the air.

  “I’m sorry, Mom. We were a handful.”

  “Oh no, honey. You girls were perfect. Life just got busy and I didn’t pay attention to the things that made me happy. I think that’s one reason your father found someone else.” She refolded the napkin on her lap. “I had lost myself. I didn’t feed myself in ways that help people grow and feel alive. I gave all the time, but I never rejuvenated. I think he felt that. He’d come home and see how tired I was, or that I was helping with homework, and then cleaning, and none of it made for a very romantic marriage.”

  “But every marriage is like that.” Isn’t it?

  Her mother shook her head. “I don’t know. I’ve only been married once, but if I have one bit of advice, it’s to make sure you still do things with friends. Try not to get so wrapped up with Blake that you forget who you are.”

  Blake. I need to tell her.

  Her mother reached across the table and touched her hand. “What is this really about? Is something wrong? Is something going on between you and Blake?”

  “No, no, Mom. It’s nothing like that. I just…Blake asked me to marry him.”

  Her mother’s eyes lit up. “This is a wonderful thing, right?”

  Danica didn’t answer, couldn’t answer. She was too torn.

  Her smile faded. “Or, isn’t it?”

  “It’s wonderful. He’s wonderful. Our whole relationship is, but I didn’t say yes yet.”

  “Well, that’s okay. He can wait.” She gave a little laugh. “I made your father wait two weeks before I said I’d marry him. He was a nervous wreck. He didn’t want to keep asking, and I could see the question on his lips every time we got together. I could feel him holding it back, like he’d burst if I waited too long.”

  “Really? I can’t imagine Daddy doing that.”

  “I know. Your father changed a lot after you girls were born. He became more work-oriented. I think he felt pressured to provide.”

  “Makes sense,” Danica agreed.

  “So, tell me what you’re thinking, Danica. Do you love him?”

  “More than anything in this world. I gave up being a therapist for him.”

  “And he obviously loves you.”

  Danica nodded.

  Her mother took a sip of her iced tea, and Danica could see the gears of her mind churning over the possibilities.

  “It’s Kaylie,” she finally admitted, and she felt like a great weight had lifted from her chest. “God, Mom. I can’t get married when Kaylie’s so unhappy.”

  “Oh, Danica.” She touched her hand again. “You’ve always been the best big sister. You’ve always looked out for Kaylie. You’ve guided her through the troubled times—too bad you didn’t get through to her about sex when she was young. It might have been best if she’d slowed down a bit. But I guess no one could have gotten through to her. That girl had a hankering, and she’d be damned if she didn’t sow those oats.”

 
“You knew I used to talk to her about that stuff?” What other secrets has she kept?

  “Of course. The sneaking out, the lying about who she was with so she could go make out with one boyfriend or another. Mothers know everything, and the truth is, Kaylie doesn’t know how lucky she is to have you.”

  I know, and it sucks. I wish she’d grow up. I hate that I can’t move on because of her. Guilt consumed Danica for the thoughts that were running through her head. Her mother must have read the guilt in her eyes because she took Danica’s hand in hers and said just the right thing.

  “Danica, Kaylie is not your responsibility. She’s a big girl. She’s a college graduate, and although she still comes across as impetuous and maybe even a little self-centered…”

  Danica’s eyes bloomed wide. “Mom!”

  “Well, she can be.” She laughed. “That’s just Kaylie, but she’s a big girl. She can, and will, figure out her life. You can’t save her from herself. You can’t fix her problems or make her be more like you.”

  “I’m not trying to make her like me,” Danica snapped. Am I?

  “I don’t mean exactly like you. I just know how much it has frustrated you that she didn’t always make the best choices.”

  Danica sighed. “I know she loves Chaz, and she wants this baby, but she’s jumping to some pretty big conclusions. She’s got herself all tied up in knots, and I’m not sure how well they’re doing right now. He said something about how she could work or stay at home and not work.”

  “Oh no. God help the person who tells Kaylie what to do, or what not to do.”

  “Yeah, tell me about it. Kaylie took it to mean that he wanted her barefoot and pregnant.”

  Her mother shook her head. “Oh, Kaylie.”

  “I’m trying to talk to her, but I can’t tell Blake I’ll get married if Kaylie’s life is in such shambles.”

  “Danica, you listen to me. Kaylie is who Kaylie is. I love her more than earth itself, but she does have a penchant for drama. You can’t live your life to protect her. Let yourself be happy. You deserve it just as much as she does, and she’d be upset if she knew you were putting your life on hold because of her.”