His Reverie

by Monica Murphy

  “I needed to see you.” I go to her, draw her into my arms and just hold her close. Breathe her in. I don’t try to kiss her. I just want to absorb her for a bit. “I don’t want you to leave early,” I murmur against her hair.

  She clutches at my T-shirt, her face pressed against my chest. “I don’t want to leave either. It’s the second time Mama has mentioned it to me too. She sounded serious this time though,” she says, her voice muffled. “She has a date planned out and everything.”

  “When?” Nerves eat at me as I anxiously wait for her answer.

  “A week from today.” She clutches me tighter and I hear her sniff. So help me God if she’s crying… “We should’ve had at least another two weeks together if we were going by the normal schedule. I usually don’t start school until the last week in August.”

  “So what happened? Why are you leaving early?” I ask, impressed I don’t sound like a panicked loser because that’s exactly how I feel.

  “I don’t know,” she practically wails, shaking her head against my chest. “One day everything’s fine and then the next, my mom is talking about shutting down the house and packing everything up. She won’t talk to Daddy. They aren’t speaking, but he hasn’t come out of his office in days so that’s no surprise. Something weird is going on. They’re being so secretive.”

  I tug on the ends of her ponytail so she lifts her head, her luminous blue eyes meeting mine. “You don’t think it’s about us, do you?”

  “No.” She slowly shakes her head, her eyes going even wider. “I don’t think so. Wouldn’t they just confront us if they found out what we were doing?”

  “Those are my thoughts, too.”

  A little sigh escapes her. “Evan came to me last night and asked if I knew what was going on. Even he’s worried and my brother really doesn’t worry about anything.”

  That is definitely a clue something is up. Evan usually doesn’t hang around the house long enough to notice if anything’s wrong. “Did he tell you anything that he might know?”

  “He mentioned the television station and Daddy’s show. I know ratings are down but my dad reassured us a while ago it was normal. But he hasn’t been right since they came back from that meeting.” She drops her gaze, chewing on her lower lip. “Maybe it’s going to get cancelled. That would devastate him. This is his calling.”

  I’ve watched him a few times on TV and haven’t been impressed. Nervous and kind of scared, most definitely. The man knows how to put the fear of God in a person, that’s for sure. He’s not that intimidating in real life though. Actually, the guy is pretty pleasant.

  What’s weird though, is that we rarely speak although I work directly for him. We’ve exchanged words a handful of times. And once I started messing around with Reverie, I tried to avoid him every chance I got.

  “You need to talk to your mom,” I suggest as I push her hair away from her face and tuck it behind her ear. “Find out what’s really going on. You deserve to know what’s happening.”

  “I know I do. I agree. But what if…” She presses her lips together for a second, like she’s unsure she wants to say it. “What if I don’t want to know what’s going on?”

  “You can’t be kept in the dark forever,” I say gently. “You deserve to know what’s going on with your family, even if they want to hide it from you.”

  “You don’t understand.” She pulls out of my embrace, frustration and anger written all over her body. “You had this great relationship with your mom and she treated you like an adult. My parents aren’t like that. They still treat me like the little girl I used to be. I bet my dad looks at me right now and sees the eight-year-old girl I once was. The one who wore the fancy dresses and always wanted to sing on his TV show. I really doubt he sees the woman I’ve become.”

  “Don’t get ahead of yourself baby,” I tease, but she shoots me a hardened glare.

  “I’m being serious, Nick. Maybe I should tell my parents about us.” She lifts her chin slightly, looking every inch the dignified princess despite her causal outfit. “What can they do? How can they stop us?”

  Oh they can do plenty to stop us. The fact that I haven’t told her about my past and the time I spent in jail is weighing on me big time. I’m a liar by omission. And that sucks. My secret is killing me and I need to come clean. I’ve needed to come clean for weeks. It’s just so damn hard to tell her what I’ve done. What’s happened to me and the kind of people I had to spend time with while I was locked up.

  It doesn’t matter that my friend lied and that’s how we ended up in jail. It’s the fact that I’ve been there in the first place that will horrify her. She won’t see the injustice it of it all. How time was ripped away from me as I was forced to sit and stew and wait for a judge to decide my fate when I knew it all along.

  All she’ll see is that I’ve been arrested and that I spent months in jail. She’s so good and sweet and would never do anything wrong. How can I expect her to understand? It’s why I’ve been so afraid to tell her.

  “No way can you tell them,” I say, my voice stern. “That would be the worst thing ever.”

  “You know, I really don’t think it would. I believe they’d appreciate my honesty.” She grabs me and hugs me tight. “I’m sick of pretending we’re not together. They won’t hate you, Nick. They’ll see all of your good qualities just like I do. They’ll fall in love with you too.”

  I reluctantly put my arms around her when I really should be pushing her away and telling her she needs to listen to reason. “Reverie…look. There’s something I—”

  Michael bursts into the stables, his cheeks glowing red like he just ran a marathon and his expression panicked. “Dude, you need to get out here quick.”

  Reverie steps out of my embrace so fast it’s like she was never there. “What’s wrong?”

  “Your little neighbor is here. The hot one.” Michael waves a hand as he tries to come up with her name. “You know who I’m talking about. Umm…Krista!” He snaps his fingers. “She’s outside.”

  Panic slams into my chest like a punch to my heart. “Krista’s here? Where?’

  “I found her at the front door, waiting for someone to appear. Thank Christ no one ever answers it. I asked if she was looking for you and she said not really but I somehow convinced her to come with me.” He jerks his thumb toward the front door. “She’s waiting for you.”

  My stomach drops like I’m in free fall and I swallow hard. I can hardly look at Reverie but I can feel her anger radiating off her in heavy waves. She doesn’t like that Krista’s here.

  I don’t like it either. Because I’m pretty damn sure I know the reason for her sudden appearance.

  “I’ll be right back.” I look at her, see the way she’s standing there with her arms crossed in front of her chest in a defensive pose, her back ramrod straight. Her expression is stoic but I see the pain and anger in her eyes.

  “Why is she here?”

  I glance at Michael who’s still waiting for me. “Can you keep Krista occupied for me? Please? I’ll be out in less than five, I promise.”

  “Dude, you better make it two. That chick is chomping at the bit to talk to one of the Hales.” He sends me a pointed look before he exits the stables.

  I turn back to Reverie, wanting to approach her, to comfort her, but I have a feeling she’d just push me away so I don’t move. “I don’t know why she’s here,” I lie, feeling like a complete jackass.

  Reverie throws her hands up in the air. “Come on, Nick. Is she wanting to see me? So she can tell me all sorts of sordid little details about your past together?”

  “No.” I shake my head vehemently. “I think…” Shit. “I’m pretty sure she wants to tell your parents about us.”

  Reverie’s mouth drops open. “How does she even know that we’re together? Did you tell her?”

  “No. She saw you come out of my apartment. Said she recognized you from when you were on your dad’s show a long time ago. She used to watch it and
always loved the dresses you wore. Crazy right?” I sound panicked. Maybe because I am panicked. I feel like all my worlds are colliding at once and I can’t stop the wreck from happening.

  The skeptical look on Reverie’s face says it all. She doesn’t believe me. “I don’t want you talking to her.”

  “I have to, Reverie. I have to stop her. Do you want her to go to your parents and tell them about us? That you spent the night at my apartment?”

  Reverie’s eyes fill with horror. “That’s why we should’ve told them in the first place,” she whispers. “Then we wouldn’t have to worry about this.”

  I go to her and grab her by the shoulders, pulling her in for a quick hug, but she fights against me. Something she’s never done. I release her, my heart cracking at her rejection. “Let me talk to her and get her out of here. I’ll come back and then we can talk. Okay?”

  She lifts her chin, my stubborn, innocent princess. “I don’t want you talking to her, Nick. I mean it.”

  “I don’t have a choice! How else am I going to stop her? You know your parents would flip out if they found out what we’ve been doing.”

  We’re both quiet for a moment, my mind racing with what I should say to Krista to get her to leave us alone. I’m sure Reverie is mulling over everything I just told her and she doesn’t look too thrilled with it. But what can I do? I don’t know how I’m going to make this work. How I’m going to keep everyone happy.

  “She’s just trying to get her claws back into you,” Reverie finally says, her voice hushed but fierce. “This is some sort of excuse for her to see you again.”

  “I don’t think so. More like she’s doing this to get back at me for dumping her.” I have no idea what Krista’s intent is. She’s pissed. I know that.

  “Whatever.” Reverie waves a dismissive hand. “I would really prefer if you didn’t talk to her.”

  “I don’t have a choice.”

  She sends me a pointed look. “We all have choices, Nick. You talk to her and well, you’ve made yours.”

  I’m incredulous. “You’re going to break it off if I talk to Krista? I’m doing this to protect you. To protect us!”

  “Really? To protect me?” The disappointment in her voice is clear. “Then you do what you feel is the right thing and I guess I’ll see what happens.” She turns her back to me and I have no choice but to go.

  Reverie is leaving it all on me. I want to choose her. There is no other choice. But Krista…she’s like playing with fire. You do it too much and you’ll get burned.

  Problem is Krista wants to set all of us on fire. I’m not her only target. So is Reverie.

  And I will do whatever I have to in order to protect her.

  Blackmail: to force or coerce into a particular action

  August 5th

  “What are you doing here?” I grab hold of Krista by her upper arm and steer her around so we’re both standing on the side of the stables farthest away from the house. She tries to get closer to me but I let go of her and step away. I’m not about to send her mixed signals. It’s bad enough, how much this girl thinks we should still be together.

  She sends me a smug smile, looking way too pleased with herself. “I’m making good on my promise. I told you I would come tell the Hales that their sweet, innocent daughter isn’t quite as sweet and innocent as they think.”

  Her promise? More like making good on her threat. “Did you actually talk to them?” I’m worried that she might’ve. Maybe Michael was wrong and he hadn’t caught her in time. Maybe Krista did get a chance to talk to the Hales and now they were looking for us. If that’s the case?

  Reverie and I are ruined.

  “Not yet but I will,” she says cheerily as she turns away from me. “I’m going on up to the house now. And you can’t stop me either.”

  Michael had already left and I bet he was halfway to the house by now. It was up to me and me alone to stop her, not that I expected his help. I’m thankful he diverted her for me in the first place. I owe him big for that.

  Krista was already headed toward the house, her steps determined though she kept looking over her shoulder, probably checking to see if I was following her.

  “Come on, Krista,” I plead but she shakes her head, increasing her pace.

  Running after her, I grab hold of her arm again, making her stop from walking any further. She shoots imaginary daggers at me with her eyes as she glares at me. She’s pissed. So am I. “I won’t let you talk to them,” I say quietly, trying to keep my temper under control. Last thing I need to do is show her I’m mad and make this worse.

  “Who says you can stop me?” She jerks out of my grip with a huff. “I can do whatever the hell I want. I’m sick of you trying to tell me what to do. What do you know about my life? What I do day in and day out? You used me. You fuck me whenever it suits you and then you kick me out of your bed. You won’t even kiss me when we do it! I really, really liked you Nick. Not that you cared.”

  I doubt she liked me. She was using me just like I used her. I refuse to let her make me feel bad for what happened between us. She wronged me first. “You can’t tell them, Krista. I mean it. You’ll ruin Reverie’s life.” She’ll ruin my life too but this isn’t about me. This is about the girl I love. The girl I’m desperate to protect. “Leave them out of this. What did Reverie ever do to you anyway?”

  “She stole my boyfriend, that’s what! You belonged to me, Nick. You and me. It’s always been you and me. We’re alike. And then this pretty, stuck up little girl has to come along and convince you that you’re better than me. Suddenly you don’t need me anymore now that you’ve got her to keep you happy. Well, you’re not any better than anyone else. Trust me. You’re just like us. Just because you fuck a rich girl doesn’t mean you’re automatically rich and perfect like her.”

  Her words sting because they’re true. I’ve known this all along, that me and Krista are alike. That we’re probably better suited for each other than Reverie and I could ever be. Reverie and I together don’t really make sense.

  But maybe that’s what makes us work.

  “Listen to me. I’ll do anything to get you to keep my secret.” I grab hold of Krista’s shoulders and stare straight into her eyes. She blinks slowly in return, her expression full of shock. “Anything. I mean it. I’ll pay you. Whatever you want. Just don’t tell the Hales about Reverie and I. I could lose my job. Reverie could lose…” Everything.

  Krista goes completely still as my words sink in. “I don’t want money,” she murmurs, her gaze intent on mine. “I just want you.”

  Of course. We all want what we can’t have right? “I can’t give what you want.”

  “Then I can’t give you what you want.”

  I squeeze her shoulders tight, wishing I could shake her. Shake some sense into her crazy head. “What exactly do you want from me?” I ask hoarsely, releasing my hold on her.

  “You. One more night with you, Nicky, just the two of us. Please?” She reaches out and scratches her fingernails down the length of my chest, her sharp nails catching on my T-shirt. “I could make it so good for you. You know I can. I know what you like. We’re perfect together. You’ll see.”

  “You said the same thing about you and David, that the two of you were perfect together. He told me,” I remind her, trying to push down the surge of pain that comes over me every time I think of the two of them together. For all I know she’s still fucking around with him. I haven’t seen him since that one time he came by my place and that feels like an eternity ago.

  I’m over what she did to me. I’ve moved on. I have Reverie and what I feel for her is a thousand times more than what Krista and I ever had. But it still hurts, the loss of David’s friendship.

  “David did us both wrong. You know it. He only cares about himself.” She takes a step closer to me, her lips curving into a knowing smile. “I’ll leave right now if you promise to meet me later tonight at my place. Say yes and I’ll walk away from this house and never come
back. You won’t have to worry about me telling them anything. But you have to promise me that you’re mine tonight. All. Mine.”

  My skin crawls at her words, at the look on her face, at the way she touches me. I don’t want this girl. I can hardly stand having her hands on me. I blow out a harsh breath, hoping Reverie can forgive me for what I’m about to do. “What time?” I ask warily.

  The smile turns triumphant. “Midnight. I’ll come by your place at the witching hour. I’ll cast my spell on you and you’ll never want to leave me again. You won’t need to. I’ll keep you perfectly satisfied.” She stands up on tiptoe and brushes her mouth against mine but I don’t hardly move. I’m tempted to spit in her face, but of course that would ruin everything.

  “Fine,” I say through gritted teeth, my lips barely moving. I’m disgusted by what I’m doing but I have to protect Reverie. My life is already shit. I don’t need to take her down with me.

  “Perfect,” she practically purrs. “Take me home?”

  “How did you get out here?” I practically shove her away from me.

  “I drove my dad’s car.” She shrugs, not even bothered that I pushed her away.

  “Then drive it back. I’ll see you tonight,” I say dismissively.

  She pouts. “You promise? Trust me, you don’t show up and there will be hell to pay. I’ll make up lies about your perfect little girlfriend and let her parents know. Tell them we had a threesome together. That you smacked her around some. Whatever I have to say, I’ll say it. I have no shame.”

  Fuck. Why did I ever get involved with this girl? When did she turn into such a horrible creature? “I said I’ll be there.”

  “Walk me to my dad’s car?” She bats her eyelashes.

  “You push me too far, Krista,” I practically growl, which only makes her laugh.

  But at least she leaves. I watch her walk away, my gaze narrowing as her retreating back gets smaller. And smaller. Dread makes me nauseous and I shove my hands in my pockets and hang my head, wondering what I can say to Reverie to make this better. To make her still believe in me.