Why was I telling him about this? Showing him that empty, soul-sucking black hole that lived inside me?
“But before I left, she gave me this.” I stopped walking and pulled my hair back. “This scar is from a bottle that she threw at me.” My voice cracked as I whispered, “I probably deserved it.”
My vampire gazed down at me, his eyes narrowed, his jaw twitching with anger.
“No,” he said. “You didn’t deserve it.”
Ethan’s expression softened when he saw my lip tremble. Cradling my head and weaving his fingers into my hair, he pierced me with his gaze.
“You are one of the few beautiful souls in the world. You didn’t deserve that. She was supposed to protect you.” He growled.
Biting my lip, I smiled a watery smile and shrugged.
“I think I understand your relationship with Aubrey now. She loved you, she cared for you, and that was the only thing you needed.”
“Maybe I’m broken….” The tears began to slowly make trails down my icy cheeks.
I gazed down at the ground, letting them drip from my top lip to the pavement.
Ethan touched my chin and raised my gaze to his. “Show me someone from this fucked up world who hasn’t been broken a time or two?”
“Are you…broken,” I asked.
He nodded. “But I don’t feel broken when I’m with you.” He sucked in an unsteady breath. “I think I’m falling for you.” He laid a hand over my heart.
I shook my head, tears glazing my eyes, and laughed, “You’re falling for me?”
“Why can’t you see what I see? You think you’re broken, but you’re resilient. You’re kind and compassionate and creative.” He pulled on his neck, “And oh my god! Sexy as hell.”
The corner of my lips curved up a bit on their own volition.
Ethan intertwined his fingers with mine, “You don’t need me, but I want you to need me. We’re not broken if we create something new, come and be whole with me.” His voice was raspy with emotion.
Leaning down, he held me to him, kissing my forehead.
We stood like that for a while until the cold crept in, warning us to keep moving. I pulled back to look up at my vampire, and he smiled that crooked smile at me.
“Come on, we need to make that phone call,” I told him, unable to help the grin that crossed my face.
I could have walked a million miles with Ethan at my side, but didn’t have to. A silver car crested the rise, and we yelled out, waving for it to stop.
The car rolled to a stop, and Ethan leaned on the open window speaking to the man in Romanian. After a moment, he motioned to me. “He’s going to give us a ride into the village.”
The kind Samaritan dropped us off in a picturesque village in front of an old medieval castle. I looked out over the stone houses and red roofs.
“Salut!” Called a voice, before stringing words together that made no sense to me. The stranger walking toward us was a black-haired man in work clothes.
I left Ethan to speak to the man and made my way up the castle steps. This was the Bed and Breakfast we should’ve stayed in last night.
Once inside, I moved toward a fire that blazed in a massive hearth in the sitting room. It lured me with its heat and earthy smell of wood.
Sitting down in one of the fireplace chairs, I closed my eyes. Even though I’d slept several hours and it was daytime here, my body was still on California time.
Don’t think about the time at home, I told myself as the fire warmed my face and legs through my pants.
Apparently, all the warnings in the world did little good because Ethan woke me sometime later.
“Caroline? I’ve got to go talk to the police, go upstairs with Alina. She runs this place and will take you to your room.”
“Hmmm?” Stretching, I caught sight of the proprietress out of the corner of my eye, frowning deeply.
“You poor child. You were lucky to survive last night. It was so cold.”
“Oh…”
“And your friend is dead! Is terrible!” Her long skirts swished along behind her as she walked. I could imagine her as the housekeeper here hundreds of years ago.
Her accent and voice were exciting and made me think of Dracula and Transylvania and vampires.
“All right,” she said, after opening a door for me, “Here is your room, here is key.”
“Thank you…” I trailed off as she bustled away.
Stepping into the chamber, I gazed around. There was a beautiful canopy bed and a large tiled fireplace. Before that fireplace sat a sofa and chairs waiting for either a good book or a cozy chat.
But I was drawn to the large window that looked out into the forest behind the castle.
Checking my phone, I looked for the wifi network but didn’t know the password. Aubrey needed to see this room.
Sitting on the bench in the window, I began snapping a few pics.
While I skimmed my photos, someone knocked on the door. Making my way over to pull it open, I found the man from downstairs holding my suitcase as well as Ethan’s.
“Oh, this one isn’t mine. Excuse me? Also, what’s the wifi password?” I asked him as he began to leave.
“No…no. No English.” He waved his hands before his face.
I sagged, “No English? Okay, thanks anyway.”
Alone again, I knew I needed to try to keep myself awake. I began pacing the room and occasionally slapping my cheeks. I needed to stay awake.
Outside my window, I spotted a gravel path leading up into the trees.
Pocketing my key and taking my coat, I decided to find out where that path led.
Strolling through the narrow stone stairway through the castle and into the front room, I found it empty.
I pulled open the door and took the steps down to the gravel driveway. After a few false starts, I finally found the trail I searched for.
A walk was the perfect way to combat my jetlag. The sun shone brightly, even though the air temperature was still low.
I need a hat, I thought.
A mix of thick evergreens stood like protectors around the other leafless trees of the forest. This place would be spectacular in the summer, but it was picturesque and eerily beautiful in the snow.
I followed the path until I spotted a strange rock sticking out of the ground. Stepping closer, I pushed my glasses up to read the markings better.
It was a gravestone, and I’d stumbled into a graveyard. A very old graveyard. I sucked in a breath and examined my surroundings.
Worn stones stuck out at all angles while the underbrush seemed to claw at the headstones, trying to pull them into the earth.
I took in this magical setting before snapping some pictures. As I focused on my phone, I spotted something behind a clump of trees. It was a crypt built into the side of the mountain. Stepping into the untouched snow, I tried to get near it, but the brush was too thick and the snow too deep.
Holding up my phone, I snapped a few pictures.
Then the forest went quiet, just like it had back in California before the mountain lion attacked.
I shivered.
“Hello?” I called out. “Is anybody there?”
The only sound that greeted me was the wind swooshing through the trees.
There had been howling wolves last night.
So, a little spooked, I began to briskly walk down the trail. Fear pricked at me, and I sped up until I was jogging down the mountain path toward the protective walls of the castle.
Who would’ve thought I’d be my own downfall? As I ran, my foot caught on something, and I went flying downward onto the sharp rocks and snow below me.
I lay there, stunned. Blinking and more than a little shocked, I pushed myself up to inventory the damage.
“Oh, crap!” I whispered.
My brand-new glasses were smashed. I folded them up and put them in my pocket.
Both palms were bloody and raw. My pants hadn’t ripped, but my knees ached, and my left shin throb
bed.
Then something red on the snow beneath me caught my eye—it was blood. My nose bled, dripping down my coat and onto the pristine snow.
Holding my nose, I struggled to stand.
I was a fricking disaster.
Gingerly limping, I made it back to my room without seeing anyone.
I immediately began stripping off my dirty, wet clothes when Ethan emerged from the bathroom freshly showered and dressed.
We just looked at each other in surprise for a moment.
“What happened to you?” He asked.
At the same time, I asked, “What are you doing in here?”
“You first,” he told me.
“I was out hiking and tripped,” I regarded my free hand that had begun to sting. “Now, you.”
“I thought this was my room.” Ethan buttoned a cufflink, “Go wash the dirt off, and I’ll give you some blood after.”
“You’d better be careful. My clumsiness might be contagious,” I told him as I picked out some clean clothes from my suitcase.
“Then maybe it’s good I’m here. I can heal you up after all your calamities,” he told me as I closed the bathroom door behind myself.
The water was already warm thanks to Ethan having just showered. I stood under the spout and let the hot water soak into my bones and wash over my cuts.
After a quick application of stinging soap and another rinse, I turned the spigot off. Sure enough, my knees were skinned, and a large bump was forming on my leg.
Wrapping myself in a towel, I stepped out into the room. Ethan was packing up his messenger bag.
“You ready?” He asked.
“Yeah..ouch!” My face stung something fierce.
“All right, my bumbling wonder, lay on the bed.”
Awkwardly, I scootched up onto the soft surface and cringed.
He laughed at me. “Rest your head down. You look so uncomfortable.”
“I’m all bloody. I don’t want to touch anything,” I told him.
Ethan sucked in an uneven breath before squeezing his eyes shut.
I sat back up. “Are you okay?”
He held a hand out to stop me. “I need blood myself—soon. Just give me a minute. I’ll heal you, but then I need to go.”
Pushing myself against the headboard, I watched him.
When he opened his eyes, they looked glazed, and his teeth had lengthened into sharp fangs.
“Ethan? What’s going on?” I asked, fear making my voice quiet and barely above a whisper.
Turning toward me, he put his wrist to his mouth before pressing it to my own a little rougher than necessary. The copper penny scent filled my nose as I drank from him.
When he pulled away from me, I licked my lips. My body felt warm as if the substance I drank were lava flowing through my veins.
Ethan sat there, gulping in deep breaths of air.
Then he leaned toward me, his fangs glistening with red, and a feral look in his pale eyes.
“Ethan? What are you doing?”
When he didn’t speak, I pushed at his looming body with my hands, but I couldn’t stop his advance.
He was going to bite me.
Would it hurt? Would I die?
Closer and closer, he pinned me against the bed.
Then just as I felt his breath on my bare neck, in a flash he was standing several feet away. Then he was just gone.
My heart thudded inside my chest as I felt for a wound on my neck.
He hadn’t bitten me.
He’d stopped himself.
Shaky, I made my way back to the bathroom.
Even the miracle of my healing scrapes couldn’t combat my alarm.
“It’s fine. He stopped,” I whispered to myself. “Everything is okay.”
But when I thought of the look in his eye… It was as if something else had taken hold of him. Something terrible and dark, and the Ethan I knew was no longer there.
15
I sat looking out the window into the trees, my knees pulled up to my chest.
Almost everything about Ethan was a dream come true. I’d finally found someone I connected with—someone who understood me. I’d let him in and yet…
Thinking of his ragged breath on my neck, and the way he’d so easily held me down, I shuddered. Then there were those empty, soulless eyes that stared at me through Ethan’s eyes.
Hastily, I applied mascara and tried to shake it off.
No one, not even a human man, would be perfect, so why should I expect this of Ethan?
I mean, hell, even Aubrey’s husband had his own issues—He’d been in prison.
Sighing, I strode into the bathroom and gazed at my reflection in the mirror.
My face was ghastly pale, and my eyes wide and haunted.
If only I had blush, but I only brought lip gloss and mascara.
When the door to the room opened up, I jumped.
“Caroline?” Ethan called out.
One step after another took me to the doorway into the bedroom.
“Are you feeling better?” I asked.
He nodded sheepishly. “I want to tell you what happened—why it happened.”
His gaze darted around the room before he took a seat in one of the antique chairs next to the empty fireplace.
“I think I know,” I told him, pressing my lips together.
“Come, sit across from me.” I did as he asked, and he said, “I can usually go days, sometimes weeks without blood…But around humans, I need it every day.”
“Yeah,” I whispered, thinking of his lunchtime donors.
“I underestimated how tempting your blood would be to me. How it would smell, sweet and fresh…”
“That’s not helping,” I told him bluntly.
He stood and paced. “There’s a connection between sex and blood for moroi. That’s how humans get hurt.” His eyes met mine across the room. “That’s why I won’t ever feed from you. It’s too dangerous.”
I sucked in a deep breath. “Is that what Mel meant when she warned you that day at your house?”
He huffed out a breath and nodded, his jaw ticking. “You heard that? Yes, that’s what she meant.”
I squeezed my eyes closed before looking back up at my vampire. “Have you killed anyone before?”
Ethan’s eyes trailed up from his hands to meet my gaze—his face haunted.
I turned away, my question answered.
I shook myself to try to think clearly. Feelings tangled themselves in a jumble, and my mind darted from thought to thought.
Standing, I wandered to the bed, sitting down on the edge. Ethan stood, gazing forlornly into the vacant fireplace, his expression gloomy.
His eyes met mine, as frustration and defeat settled across his face.
At that moment, I knew I had to make a decision.
I had to accept him for who he was or walk away.
But there really wasn’t a choice. I knew there wasn’t a choice.
I knew at that moment that nothing mattered except being with him.
What he was, how he was perceived, I didn’t care.
I’d already fallen for this monster, and there was no going back.
Ethan was my monster, and I’d be damned if fear was going to rip me from him—again.
Sauntering toward him, I felt a hopeful smile curve my lips. I reached down and took his hands into mine.
“It doesn’t matter. I want to be with you. I’ve made up my mind, and I won’t be changing it.”
He fell into the chair behind me, then pulled me onto his lap.
Stroking the side of my face, he whispered, “Caroline.”
I placed my index finger over his lips, and he kissed it. “Just get your shit together, because if you ever come at me again, I promise, I will hurt you.” I held up my other hand with the silver ring on it, and he raised a cocky eyebrow.
“I’ll be more careful. I promise,” he whispered.
“Damn straight. Don’t make me go all Buffy on your a
ss.” I kissed his temple.
“Buffy?”
“Buffy the vampire slayer, it’s a movie and a show,” I sighed out a weary breath.
First, his chest began to rumble, and then he erupted into full laughter. “I’d like to see this vampire slayer show.”
I just shook my head, unable to keep the smile off my face.
We had dinner with a group of colleagues from Balaur after that. Some of them spoke English, but it didn’t matter, because they talked business all night long.
I sat there, watching, pretending to listen even when they spoke Romanian. I nodded in the appropriate places and smiled in others.
All in all, it was a tedious affair.
On our way out of the small restaurant, I groaned, and Ethan wrapped an arm around me. The village was small enough that we hadn’t needed a car to go most places. But even on a short walk, the frigid air seemed to reach icy fingers through my clothes, freezing me even inside my coat.
“I imagine that was pretty tiresome for you,” Ethan said into the quiet night as we wound our way back to the castle.
I gazed up at him, “Yeah? Can I skip that next time?” I laughed, hopefully, “Or every time?”
“You don’t like being forced to listen to geeks talk computer programming?” The corner of his mouth curved up sarcastically.
“Well, when you put it like that…” I trailed off.
We continued walking, his arm wrapped protectively around me.
“I’m sorry about this entire trip.” He huffed out a breath and looked up into the clear night sky.
I stopped walking, and he came to a halt, pulling his arm away.
Facing him, I protectively tried to zip up his leather jacket even more. “We just need to work on keeping you well-fed…”
“No. It’s not just that. I’ve been thinking. I should’ve made that driver stop. I could’ve saved him. I could’ve taken the wheel, and he’d be alive.” He narrowed his eyes in thought.
“Ethan, that’s not your fault. You tried to make him stop. You asked him. He was arrogant…what could you have done?” I told him, wide-eyed.
Bloodthirsty Bastard: A Hero Club Novel Page 14