Tomorrow's Lullaby

by Lindzee Armstrong

  “Of course.” Aaron took her hand and started leading her toward the exit.

  “What about your paper?” Sienna asked. “I can walk myself home if you need to stay.”

  “I have enough for the paper. I’m not letting you walk home, alone, in the dark. I’ve got the emotional distress from no fried chicken to write about, remember?”

  “Thank you, Aaron. For everything.”

  He nodded, and they exited the stuffy ballroom and headed toward home. The chilly October air cooled her warm face, and she leaned into Aaron.

  “Want to tell me about Nana?” he asked. “Sometimes it helps to talk about it.”

  “She was great—is great. She treated me like her own granddaughter, even though I wasn’t.” Another tear. “She always made me feel so welcome. I’m really going to miss her.”

  Aaron wrapped an arm around Sienna’s shoulders, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. “I can tell Nana is very important to you.”

  She should tell him everything—it was the perfect opening.

  She couldn’t tell him everything.

  “The entire Peterson family is,” Sienna said. “They helped me through a really hard time in my life. I stay in close contact with them. We text at least a few times a week, and I visit them every time I go home.”

  “Maybe I’ll get to meet them one day. They must be pretty amazing if you speak so highly of them.”

  Sienna’s heart stuttered, then thudded back to life. He wanted to meet the Peterson’s—Hunter’s family.

  Aaron was thinking about a future that involved her.

  “They’re incredible,” Sienna said.

  At her apartment door, Aaron asked, “Want me to stay with you?”

  Sienna did. But she couldn’t say yes. Hunter and Sophie couldn’t be trusted not to let something slip. “Thanks, but I think I need to be alone right now.”

  Aaron nodded. He leaned forward and wrapped Sienna in his arms. She clung to him, relishing the protection she felt in his embrace.

  “Call me if you need anything,” he said. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

  “Absolutely.”

  Liv wasn’t home from her date yet, and the apartment was quiet. Sienna booted up her laptop and logged onto video chat. It hadn’t quite been an hour since Kyra’s call, but Sienna couldn’t wait any longer.

  Kyra’s face filled the screen, splotchy and devoid of makeup. “Thanks for calling,” she said.

  “Of course,” Sienna said. “Kyra, I’m so sorry. I wish I could give you a hug right now.”

  “Me too. David’s not home with the kids quite yet.”

  “I can wait. Do you know yet when Nana’s funeral will be?”

  “Saturday, I think. I just got off the phone with my mom, and that seems to work for everyone.”

  “I’ll see about booking a flight out there.”

  Kyra’s eyes filled with tears, and she grabbed a tissue. “That’s so sweet. But we don’t expect you to come. We know you have school and—”

  “I want to come. But I don’t want to make this any harder or more stressful for you than it has to be.” Sienna did a finger exercise on her desk. She always worried she’d wear out her welcome, and the Petersons would ask her to back off.

  “We’d love for you to come,” Kyra said. “You’re family. But if you can’t, we understand.”

  Tears pricked at Sienna’s eyes again, but this time for a different reason. She was so grateful to have the Petersons in her life. “I’ll let you know my travel plans.”

  “Thank you.” Kyra looked over her shoulder. “Oh, here are the kids. They’ll be so happy you’re coming home again so soon.”

  Kyra disappeared, and a few moments later two blue eyes and blonde hair appeared. “Hi, Sina.” Hunter waved, his fingers barely visible.

  “Here.” There was the scratch of chair legs, and then Hunter came fully into view.

  “Hi, Hunter.” Sienna waved, her heart melting as soon as she saw the little boy. He looked nearly identical to her own baby pictures, and she ached to cuddle him close. “How are you doing, buddy?”

  “I miss you.”

  “I miss you, too.”

  “Mommy cry.”

  “I know. She’s just sad because Nana went to heaven.”

  “All gone?” Hunter asked.

  Sienna let out a strangled sob. “Yes.”

  “Mommy sad.” Hunter’s lip pulled down in a pout. “Me sad.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  Hunter grabbed something, holding it up for her to see. “Ball!” He threw it, and there was a loud, muffled bump as it hit the computer screen.

  “No, no, no.” David appeared in the frame with his curly hair and thick glasses. He waved. “Hey, Sienna. How are you doing?”

  “Okay,” Sienna said. “I’m sad, but mostly worried about Kyra.”

  “She’ll get through it,” David said. “We all will. Kyra said you’re going to fly out for the funeral. That’s so nice.”

  “I want to do it.”

  “Let us know your travel plans, and we can pick you up at the airport. The spare room’s yours if you want it.” Despite the fact her parents lived only twenty minutes from Kyra and David’s, they were so sweet to always volunteer their home.

  “I’m sure my parents can pick me up, and I’ll stay with them.”

  “Well, it’s a standing offer.”

  “Thank you. Where’s Sophie?”

  David looked over his shoulder. “She’s crying. Kyra’s putting a movie on for her. Sorry, I guess she doesn’t feel like talking right now. We’ll see you this weekend then?”

  “See you then,” Sienna agreed.

  As soon as they said their goodbyes, she started looking for a ticket home.

  The next day, Sienna met Aaron on what she was coming to think of as their corner.

  “Hey,” he said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and giving a squeeze. “How are you doing?”

  “Okay.” She’d spent most of the night alternating between crying and tossing and turning. She knew Nana was in a better place, but wished she’d had a chance to say goodbye. “I’m flying home tomorrow for the funeral. Just a quick weekend trip.”

  “Let me drive you to the airport.”

  “You don’t have to do that. I can take the bus.”

  “I want to, Sienna.”

  She smiled up at him, her heart brimming with gratitude. “Thank you.”

  “What time do you need to leave for the airport?”

  “About two o’clock. Will that cut into your class schedule?”

  “Even if it did, I’d miss for you.” He kissed her on the temple. “I’m here for you, okay?”

  Sienna stayed up late Thursday night, doing laundry and packing. She was bleary-eyed during class on Friday, unfocused and tired. But there were quizzes in both her classes, so it was good she’d decided not to skip. Taking a quiz while half-awake was still better than not taking it at all.

  Aaron picked her up right on time. He carried her bag to his car, and they left for the airport.

  “Who’s picking you up in Salt Lake?” Aaron asked as they drove.

  “My parents. Or maybe just my mom. She takes advantage of every opportunity to leave the house without Conner and Cameron. Those two are a handful.”

  “I’d love to meet them sometime,” Aaron said.

  Sienna smiled, imagining Aaron playing in the backyard with her brothers. “I’d like that.”

  “When are you coming back so I can pick you up?”

  “Oh, you don’t need to do that. My flight comes in really late Sunday night. I’ll take the bus.”

  Aaron gave her a stern glare. “I’m not letting you ride home that late on the bus. What time?”

  “Eleven-thirty.” Sienna reached across the center console and squeezed his hand. “Thank you.”

  They parked in short-term parking, and Aaron waited while she got her boarding pass. She didn’t have any bags to check, which made it easier. T
hen he walked her to security.

  “Have a good trip,” he said. “Text or call when you get there so I know you’re okay.”

  “I will.”

  “Can I call you tomorrow?”

  Sienna nodded, unable to stop the smile from spreading. “I’d like that.”

  He leaned forward, crushing her in a hug. She wrapped her arms around him, relishing the feel of his body against hers. She gazed into his hazel eyes, feeling herself falling. Her eyes were magnetically drawn to his lips. They were full and a soft peach color that had her unconsciously swallowing. She closed her eyes, eager and ready to kiss him.

  His lips landed on her forehead. Sienna’s eyes popped open. Aaron stepped back, looking regretful. Don’t chicken out, she thought. Kiss me!

  “I’ll miss you,” he said, giving her another quick hug.

  “I’ll miss you, too,” Sienna said.

  “Call me when you get there. And I’ll pick you up Sunday night at eleven-thirty.”

  “Okay. And thank you.”

  Aaron let out a groan and pulled her to him again. “Bye, pretty girl.” His voice was thick with emotion, and she wanted to stay in that moment and never let him go.

  Eventually they released each other. Sienna picked up her bag and headed through security. She turned around on the other side. Aaron still stood there, watching her. He lifted his hand in a wave. She returned the gesture, then headed down the corridor toward her flight.

  It didn’t occur to her to let Jared know she was going out of town until she was waiting to board her first flight.

  Sienna: Sorry we haven’t talked since our date. Jared had called a few times, but Sienna hadn’t felt like talking.

  Jared: Is everything okay? I’ve been worried about you.

  Sienna: I’m headed home for a funeral. I’m at the airport right now. :(

  Jared: !!!! Who?

  Sienna: One of my good friends. She was like a grandmother to me.

  Jared: I am so sorry. Is there anything I can do for you? Do you need someone to pick you up at the airport?

  Sienna’s mind flashed back to Aaron, to their almost-kiss. Her stomach squirmed.

  Sienna: Thanks for the offer, but I’ve got it covered.

  Jared: See you Monday? Thought we could go to dinner then attend the church singles activity together.

  Sienna tapped her phone screen. That almost-kiss with Aaron kept replaying in her mind. Her entire body had ached with the buzz of electricity just being near him generated. In that moment, Jared hadn’t even been on her radar.

  But chemistry wasn’t everything. She’d spent most of the last two days telling Aaron half truths, because she didn’t think he could handle reality. Wasn’t that a red flag?

  Sienna sent Jared one last text.

  Sienna: Sounds great. See you Monday.

  By the time her plane landed in Salt Lake City, she was exhausted. She pulled out her cell phone to check the time—11:05 p.m.—and saw a text from Aaron.

  Aaron: I miss you already. Hope you had a good flight.

  Sienna grabbed her bag from the overhead bin and texted Aaron back as she waited to exit the plane.

  Sienna: I miss you too. Just landed in SLC. Flight was uneventful.

  The response was almost immediate. She grinned. Was Aaron waiting by the phone, anxious to hear from her?

  Aaron: Glad you got there safe. Sleep well, pretty girl. We’ll talk tomorrow.

  Sienna followed the line of people off the plane. Her mom waited in baggage claim, dark shadows under her eyes. Her short honey-blonde hair looked like it hadn’t seen a brush since morning, and her face was scrubbed clean of makeup. She held out her arms, and Sienna fell into them.

  “I missed you,” Anabelle said, hugging Sienna tightly.

  “I missed you, too.”

  “Do you have any bags?”

  Sienna shook her head, lifting the small duffel. “This is it.”

  “Okay, let’s go then.”

  Sienna followed her mom out of the airport and to the car.

  “Are the twins asleep?” Sienna asked as they pulled out of the parking garage.

  “Yes. Your dad was sad he didn’t get to come pick you up, but I told him I wanted to come myself. I’m so sorry about Nana.”

  “Me too,” Sienna said.

  “What are your plans for the weekend?”

  “The viewing is at eleven tomorrow, and the funeral is at noon. After that, it’ll depend on Kyra and David. I was hoping to spend a little time with Hunter, but I don’t want to interfere with their plans or get in the way.”

  “You’re never in the way. Kyra and David love you.”

  “I know.” And Sienna really did. But she didn’t want to step on any toes.

  “Want me to come with you to the funeral?” Mom asked.

  Sienna thought about it for a moment, then shook her head. “No, I’ll be fine by myself. I want to help Kyra with the kids so she can focus on the services.”

  “I’m sure she’ll appreciate that.” Mom paused, then said, “We’d love to see Hunter while you’re here if we can.”

  Sienna nodded, saying nothing. Watching their first grandchild be raised by someone else hadn’t been easy on her parents. But they had supported Sienna’s decision one hundred percent.

  “Tell me about school,” Mom said as they drove down I-15 toward Riverton. “I haven’t heard from you much since it started.”

  “It’s barely been a month, so there’s not much to tell.” Sienna debated for a moment whether or not to say more. “I’m kind of dating someone. Well, two guys, actually.”

  Her mom’s head whipped toward Sienna, then quickly back toward the road. “When did this happen, and why wasn’t I the first to know?”

  Sienna blushed. “I’m not sure yet if it’s going anywhere with either guy.”

  “It’s going somewhere if you’ve been on a few dates. Tell me all about them.”

  Sienna’s mom already knew about Jared, and was happy to hear the two were dating again. Sienna also told her mom about Aaron, leaving out the part about his adoption. It felt good to acknowledge him as someone important in her life.

  Sienna’s mom pulled into the driveway of her childhood home. This house held so many memories, and her heart warmed just seeing it. Her dad sat in the living room, his mouth half-open in sleep as the television played quietly.

  Mom gently shook his shoulder. “Look who’s home.”

  Dad wrapped Sienna in a hug and kissed her on the cheek. “Good to have you home. We’re so sorry about Nana, honey.”

  “Thanks,” Sienna said.

  “Want us to go to the funeral with you tomorrow? We could probably find a babysitter for the twins.”

  “Mom already offered. That’s sweet, but I think I need to go alone.”

  Her dad nodded in understanding. “Well, I’m off to bed. I’ll see you two in the morning.”

  Sienna wished both her parents goodnight and dragged her bag down the hallway to her old bedroom.

  It looked the same as it had on the day Sienna left for Philadelphia nearly two years ago. The bedspread was a cheerful aqua, the dresser drawer fronts papier mâchéd in old sheet music. Four black frames with music notes mounted on burlap hung on one wall, and a picture of a little girl playing piano on the other.

  Sienna fell back onto the bed and stared at the ceiling. She’d cried in this bed all night after finding out she was pregnant. She’d lain here after throwing up throughout the first trimester. She’d paced the carpet with discomfort every night for a month before she delivered.

  The notes from Hunter’s Lullaby floated into her head, and she fought the urge to pull out score paper and tinker with one of the transitions. She was moving forward. She could appreciate the memories of the past, without getting lost in them.

  Sienna pulled herself upright and wandered into the bathroom to get ready for bed. She had a long day tomorrow. She’d better sleep while she could.

  Sienna had planned o
n sleeping in, but she should’ve known it was a lost cause. The sound of running feet woke her before the sun.

  Sienna lit up the display on her cell phone, peering at it through squinted eyes, and groaned at the time. Barely six o’clock.

  Her bedroom door burst open. Conner and Cameron ran across the room and jumped on top of her, laughing.

  “Sienna!” they said.

  Sienna grunted theatrically as they dog-piled her. She pushed herself into a sitting position. They wrapped their arms around her neck and hugged her tight.

  “We missed you,” Conner said.

  “I missed you guys, too.” Sienna kissed them both on the cheek and laughed as they groaned and tried to scrub the kisses off. “How’s school?”

  “We have to stay there all day,” Cameron said. “It’s so long.”

  “But we get to eat lunch at school,” Conner said. “Cuz we’re the big kids now. The kindergarten babies have to go home and eat with their mommies.” Cameron and Conner started laughing.

  Sienna pushed them off the bed amid giggles. “Go eat breakfast and let me get ready.”

  “Will you watch cartoons with us?”

  “After I practice the piano.”

  The boys groaned, and Sienna smiled as she remembered other Saturdays that had played out much the same. But the boys left the room, and Sienna quickly got ready.

  She was just sitting down at the piano bench when her phone dinged with a text.

  Aaron: Just wanted you to know I’m thinking about you. Good luck with the funeral today. I wish I could be there to support you.

  Sienna: Thank you, that means a lot. She hesitated, then sent another text. I miss you.

  Aaron: I miss you, too. When you get back, I think we should talk about how much we miss each other. :)

  Her heart fluttered, and she sent him a smile emoticon. Then she started playing.

  Sienna was only able to put off her brothers for an hour, but she managed to go through each of her Juilliard audition pieces once. Then she snuggled on the couch next to her brothers and tried to live in the moment instead of obsessing about her audition. Cameron and Connor were growing up too fast, and she didn’t get to spend nearly enough time with them.

  After a half hour of mindless cartoons, her mind wandered back to the piano in the living room. The melody for the new piece she was composing—the one without a name—kept running through her head, and she ached for the piano to test out the new stanza she’d just imagined. She had a feeling that when played, the notes would sound a lot like Aaron’s laugh.