The Astronomer

by Charmaine Pauls

  “Are you saying I’m fast and clever?” She gave him a mocking smile.

  “Have you watched Al in flight?”

  She nodded.

  “Then you would have noticed his power, grace and beauty.”

  A knock on the door had them both look up. Marguerite smiled as she let herself in without waiting for a reply. “Sorry to interrupt your breakfast, but I’m leaving in an hour. Mind if we talk while you eat?”

  Fraya shook her head. “Please. Make yourself at home.”

  “Would you like some breakfast?” Emilio offered.

  “No. Thank you. I ate at the residence. I came to have a chat with Fraya.” She glanced at Emilio meaningfully.

  “I think I’ll take Al Shain for his morning walk,” he said. When Fraya lifted her brow, he said, “Figuratively speaking, of course, and then we’ll finish breakfast.” He shot Fraya a look that spoke a thousand words, making her blush to her roots. “Figuratively speaking.”

  Fraya shyly turned her attention to the doctor who watched the exchange with a grin and an arched brow.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  When Emilio had left with Al perched on the leather sleeve on his arm, Marguerite turned to Fraya. “How do you feel?”

  “Much better now.” She looked at the floor. “Thank you for yesterday.”

  “I’m sorry you had to go through that. Believe me, if I had any indication as to how intense it was going to get, I would have never let you leave without the hormone treatment.”

  “Lesson well learned.”

  “I’ve made a study of similar cases, but there aren’t many.”

  “What options do we have, what chance of ever being ... cured?”

  “As I explained to Emilio, the only permanent cure is conception.”

  Fraya stilled. She looked at Marguerite in disbelief. “As in falling pregnant?”

  “Yes, as in having a baby. The pregnancy hormones will reverse the effect of the symptoms you’re suffering from for good.”

  “That’s not an option,” Fraya said.

  “Yes, Emilio said your career was very important to you.”

  “You don’t understand. Emilio didn’t mate me to have a family. He only mated me for sex. Why would he even consider having a baby with me?”

  “I think you’ll find him more willing than what you imagine.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “I’ve known Emilio all my life. He comes from a big family, and he’s always wanted his own. And now he’s found his perfect mate.”

  “It’s not like that between us. It’s complicated. This mating, we didn’t do it for the right reasons.”

  “Anyway, whatever you decide, I know that Emilio will never take the decision out of your hands. The treatment should help, until such time as, maybe one day, you change your mind.”

  “And until then, until I have a baby, I’ll always need him?”

  “Yes. Maybe it’s nature’s way of ensuring successful breeding, who knows? But you’ll be able to control it. With the treatment you can function normally. There are other factors to take into consideration that will make your life easier.”

  “Such as?”

  “No coffee, no chocolate, no tea, basically nothing with caffeine. Caffeine aggravates the symptoms. So will adrenaline. No hectic sports, no adventure stunts. And try to avoid becoming worked up or angry.”

  No coffee? Oh, there couldn’t be a worse punishment.

  “So I must lead a quiet, calm little life, and do without the things I enjoy eating and drinking most, all the while feeling an impossible arousal eating away at my gut, the only way to still it being falling pregnant and sacrificing my career?”

  “If you put it like that it sounds really harsh.”

  “How am I supposed to put it?”

  “Think of it as a healthier lifestyle, with the perfect mate. And having a family doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice a career that’s important to you. You can have both.”

  “Oh, that’s just great.”

  Marguerite checked her watch. “I better leave to give you two lovebirds some time to have breakfast.” She flashed a brilliant smile. “If you need me, no matter what the time or the day, call me.”

  “Thank you,” Fraya mumbled, staring at the doctor’s back as she walked back to the company car. She caught Emilio’s gaze through the window. Fraya thought he looked concerned, and justifiably so, because right now, she felt like kicking his ass.

  “Why do I get the feeling you’re not happy?” Emilio said as he reentered the kitchen. He deposited Al on his perch.

  “You know about my ... restrictions ... for a happier life?” Fraya asked, leaning against the counter.

  “Yes.” He sounded truly regretful.

  “Then why did you prepare me coffee? Couldn’t break the news? Rather let the doctor take the blow?”

  He gave her one of those reassuring smiles she found so irresistible.

  “I reckoned that while I’m still here, I could relieve the ... symptoms.”

  She took a deep breath. “So no coffee when you’re not around.”

  “I’m sorry. I know how much you like your coffee.”

  She shrugged. “I suppose there are worse things that can happen.”

  He crossed the floor and wrapped his arms around her. “I’d really like to show you just how effective my treatment can be, but I’d first like to see you eat something.” He pulled a chair out and gently pushed her into it. “I made fruit salad and there are eggs. Want some?”

  His kindness was almost overwhelming. Fraya didn’t know what to make of it. He was in as much of a dilemma as she. She didn’t care much for eggs, not right then, but she smiled and said, “Yes. Eggs will be great.”

  Her answer seemed to please him. She watched him prepare their meal, wondering how he felt about the news they had just received.

  When he put the plates in front of them, he said casually, “I’ve had a message from Gene.”

  She looked up quickly. “And?”

  His expression darkened. “He’s fine.”

  She drew patterns with her fork on the plate. “Coming home, anytime soon?”

  “No.”

  “Did you tell him?”

  He studied her for a moment. “About us?”

  “Yes.”

  “No, he didn’t leave a contact number. He texted from an unlisted number.”

  “Oh.” She shrugged. “Not that it matters, really.”

  “He dumped you and it doesn’t matter?”

  “What am I supposed to do? Feel sorry for myself?”

  “No. You can admit your true feelings and deal with them.”

  “I’m fine,” she said. She gulped down the last of the coffee and got up. “Thank you for breakfast.”

  “Don’t mention it,” he said, clearing her plate and cup.

  “When are you leaving?”

  “I have to get back this morning. I have an important meeting about the new hotel development.”

  Fraya looked away. “I’m sorry that you had to come all the way out here.”

  He moved to her and placed his hands on her shoulders. “I’m sorry, Fraya. I didn’t know. You should have told me. If you ever let yourself suffer like that again I’ll punish you.”

  She shivered under his palms. “I thought I’d last.”

  “The problem with you is that you’re too proud.”

  “A girl is allowed to have her pride.”

  “Not when it causes you pain.” He brushed his thumb over her cheek. “I can tell you’re better this morning. Marguerite said she upped the hormone dose. You should be fine with that until you come home. But if not, I want you to call me. Understood?”

  Fraya knew it was pointless arguing. “Yes, sir.”

  “That’s my girl.” His arms went around her waist. “Now, I’ve fed you coffee, so I owe you a cure before my plane takes off in an hour.”

  Fraya watched with a feeling of regret that surprised her
as Emilio’s private jet cut through the desert sky later that morning. It had been a frightening experience, and she both resented and enjoyed the ‘cure’. She didn’t like the control it gave Emilio over her, but then again, he was affected too. Fraya didn’t want to linger on the subject. She had a job that needed to be done. Deliberate steps took her back to the main entrance. Two employees in green SWO jackets looked up as she crossed the foyer. She adjusted the red bandana around her neck, greeting them briefly and marched with long strides to Tracy’s desk.

  “You look like your old self this morning,” Tracy said. “You had us worried yesterday.”

  “Damn hormones,” Fraya said under her breath.

  Tracy smiled wistfully. “Sounds like a million dollar deal to me.”

  “It’s not as wonderful as it may seem to be physically dependent on a man.”

  Tracy raised an eyebrow. “Sexually dependent. On a looker of a man, too. Doesn’t sound like a cruel fate to me.”

  “Yes, well, I don’t like not being in control of my own body.” Fraya looked over her shoulder at the men regarding her. “And I’ll appreciate your discretion in the matter. It’s not something I’d like to advertise.”

  “Of course.”

  Fraya clipped her access card to her tank top and made for the stairs. “Thanks for yesterday, by the way.”

  “Don’t mention it.”

  Tim looked up from the filing cabinet when Fraya swept into her office. He looked genuinely relieved.

  “Thank God you’re back. I was getting worried I’d lose my job.”

  Fraya threw her light khaki jacket over the chair back.

  “Don’t be so dramatic,” she said, but flashed him a brilliant smile.

  “Want some coffee?” He was already moving to the machine.

  “No.” Fraya sighed heavily. “No more coffee for me. You can have it. Put the percolator in your office. Anywhere where I don’t as much as smell it.”

  “God, are you pregnant?” he asked, a tinge of concern lacing his voice.

  She rolled her eyes. “Of course not. Health reasons. Don’t ask.”

  “Alrighty,” he said uncertainly.

  Fraya sat down in her chair and started flipping through a stack of files. “Did you get an answer for our request for telescope time?”

  “No. And the boss wants to see you about that.”

  Of course he still did. “Schedule an appointment.”

  “Er ... that won’t be necessary. He said to come and see him the minute you get in.”

  She sighed again. “How I need that damn coffee right now.” She got to her feet. “There’s a shared folder on the system with theoretical formulas for measuring the duration of a planet’s extinction, from the point of combustion to the point of dying. Use the data to create a slide show presentation.”

  “Yes boss.” He gave a lopsided smile. “Happy to have you back.”

  Saunders looked up when Fraya entered his office.

  “Sit,” he said, motioning to the chair in front of his desk. “I don’t like what happened yesterday.”

  “It won’t happen again,” Fraya said stiffly.

  “If it interferes with your job–”

  “It won’t.”

  “So you, your mate and the doctor say. But I don’t like what I’ve seen. If it was up to me, your ass would have been out of here, but, regretfully, Welser seems to be little fazed about it.”

  “You spoke to Welser about that?” she said, her eyes wide.

  “It could be an important performance violation.”

  “Just let me prove myself before you come to any foregone conclusions.”

  “That’s exactly what Welser said.”

  “Did you want to see me just about that, or do you actually want to discuss work?”

  Saunders narrowed his eyes, but instead of reprimanding her for her tone, he said, “Your telescope time proposal is unmotivated.”

  “No it’s not. I’ve complemented it with my theoretical assumption.”

  “Yes. Very ambitious, I have to say. You are proposing to measure something in one year that other astronomers have tried to solve for a lifetime.”

  “That’s the deadline Welser gave me. And I have been working on this for a lifetime.”

  “I see why Welser said that you were obsessed. You have to explain yourself better than with an assumed theory.”

  “I have a proposal ready. You’ll find a shared document on the system. I’d like to keep it confidential, for the time being.”

  “Your specialty is stellar archaeology, not cosmology, and what you’re proposing is cosmology. How long exactly have you been working on this?”

  “For just about forever.”

  “It’s not mentioned in your resume.”

  “Yes, because, as you’ve said, it’s not my specialty. That doesn’t mean I haven’t theorized about it. I have something different in mind, in my field, which I’ll present to you shortly. I just need to fine-tune it. In the meantime, I’ve promised Welser that I’d give him something to make the SWO famous, and defining dark matter will do just that.”

  “I detect some slyness in your manner of working.”

  “This theory was something I worked on in my private time. And it’s not unusual for astronomers to keep their private projects secret.”

  “No. Alright. I can see your point. But I can’t grant you the full AKMY time scope you’re requesting. Why not apply for time on the S-ELT instead?”

  “The Big Eye is more useful for tracking stars in habitable zones and you know it. I need AKMY.”

  “AKMY is dedicated to the search of our cosmic origins.”

  “It’s also possible to use it to study light from some of the oldest objects in the universe, data I’ll need for my study.”

  “What about the VLT? It’s less in demand.”

  “The VLT is just a giant magnifying glass.”

  “I’d say with the ability to distinguish the headlights of a car at the distance of the moon, calling it a ‘giant magnifying glass’ is a bit of an understatement.”

  “Mr. Saunders, I need Antu, Kueyen, Melipal and Yepun,” Fraya said, using the Mapuche names attributed to the individual telescopes. “One telescope will give me a billion times the ability of the naked eye, but together they are four billion times stronger. With only one telescope I have a less than one percent chance of finding a dying star.”

  “I have more senior astronomers than you, and world organizations competing for the same slots. I’ll have my hands full defending you, and justifying granting your request.”

  “That’s your job, isn’t it?”

  He blew out a sigh. “I’ll give you half the time. If you come up with anything substantial, it’ll give you a better foot to stand on. But you better not disappoint me.”

  “I have no intention to.”

  “Good. I’m glad we’re clear on the matter. But be warned, you’re not going to make yourself popular by taking time on the scopes from other, more senior astronomers.”

  “I’m not here to win a popularity contest, or to make friends.”

  “A word of caution, Fraya, this is a team based operation. I’m familiar with your drawbacks, the biggest one being that you’re a loner, that you don’t function well in a team. When you do start achieving the results you claim you will, you are going to have to perform some teamwork.”

  “I’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”

  He sighed. “I sure as hell don’t have time to protect your ass. One mistake, or a disruption in my team and you’re out. Are we clear?”

  “Crystal clear.”

  “Get your ass back to work.”

  “Thank you,” she said, smiling sweetly.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Her mate himself was waiting for Fraya at the airstrip when the private jet landed. It had been a rough beginning to her first job and after only eight days she already felt exhausted. It wasn’t just the desert, the humidity of below ten p
ercent that made it impossible for anything to grow outside, the intense ultraviolet rays from the sun, or the altitude that were difficult, it was also the human factor. Fighting battles just to win telescope time was as draining as surviving at base camp. Despite the science archive facility at headquarters with more than sixty-five terabytes of data, the equivalent of thirty million books of a thousand pages each that would take up more than six hundred miles of bookshelves, there wasn’t enough of the data she needed to revolutionize the perception of the universe, much as Galileo’s telescope did four hundred years ago. Fraya would have to find new dying stars to measure.

  She had left Al in Tim’s care and the builders had returned to their work on the condo. The lingering pain she had gotten used to was gone, thanks to the increased dose of hormones Marguerite had prepared, but as Fraya stepped from the plane, just looking at her husband, a familiar, silky hot feeling settled in her loins.

  Emilio took her briefcase and carried it to the waiting car. She didn’t have to pack, as she had left enough clothes at Emilio’s place for the days she would spend in Santiago. Even now, miles away from her office, her head was still wrapped around the problems she had encountered at work, the creases she had to iron out in order to provide a theory for dark matter, before she could turn her attention to her real proposal, the one that made her decide to study astronomy in the first place, the one she still kept secret. Despite her exhaustion, she felt loathe to leave the observatory when all she wanted was work on it night and day until it was resolved. Of the eight days she was to spend in the capital, four of those were supposed to be resting days, while the remainder would be spent at head office, dealing with administration and doing her research.

  As if reading her mind, Emilio said, “Still at the observatory?”

  “Mmm.” She pulled herself back to the present, and suddenly facing her mate, her husband by law, she didn’t know if she should be kissing him, shaking his hand, or simply do nothing.

  Emilio’s smile made her think that he could definitely see what was going on in her head, because he tossed her briefcase into the back of the car, took her face between his hands and kissed her for a long time. Fraya almost forgot where she was, until Emilio pulled away and said, “Welcome home.”