Mastering Lexie (Stronghold Book 4)

by Golden Angel

  "He was supposed to come after me, to prove to me that he cares about me more than he cares about..." Her voice trailed off. Ugh. Lexie shrank down a bit, hunching her shoulders as her words echoed in her head. No wonder Andrew was calling her selfish and telling her to grow up. No wonder they all were. She hadn't realized it until she'd said the words out loud, but she was acting like a high school teenager with a crush, not like an adult who wanted a relationship.

  Granted, she still wished that Patrick had come after her harder... but then again, he'd reached out, hadn't he? He'd called and texted, and because it wasn't the response she wanted, she'd ignored that. Dismissed it. And she wanted him to prove that he cared more about her than he did about Jake? UGH. When did she get so needy? She knew that he loved them both. Yeah, he should fight for her, but he should also respect his friendship with Jake. She should respect that friendship too instead of playing games to try and push Patrick into behaving the way she wanted him to. Not that she’d meant to play games, exactly, but that’s what had happened.

  That's what Andrew meant when he said she was only thinking about herself. Yeah, she thought she could make Patrick happy, but she was going about it in the wrong way right now. She'd started off so right, but then when he hadn't followed the course she'd plotted out in her head, when he hadn't reacted the right way, she'd practically had a meltdown.

  "I'm such an idiot," she mumbled, tears sparking in her eyes.

  "Aw, it's okay honey, we all are sometimes," Andrew said, reaching over to pat her on the head. "Besides, you aren't all in the wrong. He shouldn't have let you push him into training you so soon in the first place."

  "Thanks," Lexie said, snorting. "Not exactly what I meant."

  "Yeah well, relationship are rough. Especially when you're into kink and trying to figure out if the person you love can also give you what you need." Something about his voice had changed, and when Lexie looked at him, he was staring off into space, looking at a blank spot on her wall. She immediately knew that he wasn't really talking about her and Patrick. "It's not easy and it can go really, really badly. I don't blame Patrick at all for being cautious. I'm surprised he wasn't more so."

  "You're talking about you and Katherine, aren't you?" she asked quietly, not wanting to jolt him out of his introspective mood. Andrew so rarely brought up his ex, especially what ended their relationship, even this little bit of insight was a revelation.

  "I pushed too hard, and she couldn't handle it," he said, just as quietly. The inherent sadness in his expression had Lexie scooting closer to him, leaning her head against his shoulder to offer comfort. "I know Patrick was scared of doing the same thing to you."

  "That's because he thinks I don't know what I want or need."

  "No, it's because the reality is different from the fantasy. Katherine had the fantasies, but she couldn't handle the reality."

  Yeah, like how in her fantasies, she could always handle everything that Patrick threw at her. And her nipples were never sore for days after a scene. Not that she minded that part, she just hadn't fantasized about it. For her, the reality had been just as good as her fantasies, better, but she could imagine how that might not have been the case. What if Patrick had been more into pain than she'd thought? Or demanded High Protocol all of the time? There were a few couples at Stronghold who practiced that, and she couldn't imagine always having to ask to speak. Sure, she'd known he'd never required that of his girlfriends, but she'd never known for sure what went on in his bedroom.

  Poor Andrew. He was still staring off into space, his mostly-eaten bagel just resting in his hand on his thigh. Lexie nuzzled her head against his shoulder. "Is that why you're such a man-whore now?"

  "Excuse me?" he asked, jerking out of his reverie, and Lexie giggled, as he pushed her away from him. He practically pouted at her, insulted. "Did you just call me a man-whore?"

  "Hey, if the shoe fits..."

  "Just because I like to make sure as many of Stronghold's masochistic submissives are as satisfied as possible..."

  Lexie rolled her eyes. "Uh huh. Keep telling yourself that."

  "What do you mean by that?" Andrew asked, narrowing his eyes at her. Lexie gave him a look.

  "Seriously? You might satisfy a few of the subs, who don't want relationships, like Ellie, but the rest of them wish you would settle down. Granted, they all want to be the one you settle down with..."

  "They know the score."

  "That doesn't stop them from hoping," she said tartly. More than one submissive had ended up in the locker room crying, because Master Andrew had played with her last week and then hadn't given her a second glance this week. Maybe she'd been ignorant about what she was doing to Patrick, but he was just as ignorant about what he'd been doing to the subs.

  "I can't stop them from hoping," Andrew said with a shrug. "I tell them the truth, and that's all I can do. Whether they choose to believe me or not is up to them."

  Lexie made a face at him, but there wasn't much she could say to that. He did tell the truth. Always. Brutally sometimes. And the subs kept choosing to scene with him anyway. Kind of like she'd kept chasing after Patrick anyway.

  She should call him. Or, better yet, go to him. Maybe bake something as a peace offering. After talking to Andrew, she could understand Patrick's side of things a little better. At the very least, he deserved to be heard out. Pride made for a lonely bedfellow.

  "I'll go talk to Patrick today."

  "Good girl," Andrew said approvingly. She rolled her eyes.

  "Why couldn't you have been like this last night? You kept glaring at me."

  "Last night we were in Stronghold and I was a Dom who was disappointed in your behavior. You were trying to manipulate Patrick by showing up the way you did, and I didn't approve. Today I'm your friend, doling out hard truths and big hugs."

  Lexie shrieked as he suddenly popped the last of his bagel in his mouth and wrapped his arms around her, although she noticed that he was careful not to jostle the arm holding her coffee cup. There wasn't much left, but she appreciated it anyway. She also appreciated the big hug. He was such a doofus, but she loved him.

  ******

  Something thudded against his front door. Frowning, Patrick looked up from the book he was reading. He'd decided to start on the small pile (which never seemed to get any lower) of books he'd been meaning to read. It was better than staring at the television, which didn't take nearly enough of his focus.

  THUD. THUD. THUD.

  Lexie? Patrick couldn’t think of anyone else who ever kicked his door rather than knocking on it. If her hands were full, she never bothered to put anything down, she'd just kick the door.

  Putting the book face down on his coffee table, he jumped up, moving quickly and quietly. Rather than getting his hopes completely up, he looked through the peephole. Short black hair, big blue eyes, and a wary expression met his gaze.

  Holy shit.

  He stepped back and yanked the door open.

  "Um. Hi." Lexie looked up at him with a tremulous smile on her face, as if she wasn't sure about what she was doing. As much as he loved her confidence, her hesitancy was just as endearing to him. Maybe more so, since he so rarely got to see her uncertain. She held up a cherry pie. His favorite. "I brought you pie."

  "Homemade?" he asked, grinning because he already knew the answer. Holding the door wider, he turned so that she could step inside. She gave him a dirty look as she passed by him.

  "Nope."

  Lexie made terrible pies. The only time she'd ever managed to succeed in making a good pie was with her mother standing over her, watching her every move, and guiding her every step. Otherwise, somehow, they just always turned out bad. She never did anything really obvious, like mixing up salt and sugar, but they just always came out unpalatable.

  But Patrick loved pie, and she knew it, so she'd picked one up, even knowing he'd tease her about it.

  She set the pie down on his dining room table, turning to face him and shifting
back and forth on her feet nervously. He waited, patient. As much as he wanted to know what she was doing there, he didn't want to antagonize her now that she was here. Hope was welling up inside of him that she'd come, rather than called or texted. That had to mean something.

  Finally, she straightened up to her full height and looked him in the face. "I came to say that I'm sorry for leaving the club on Thursday night and for not returning your calls or texts."

  Patrick moved forward, invading her space. She stood her ground, tilting her head back to keep eye contact. The thin blue sweater she was wearing couldn't hide the hardening of her nipples as he loomed over her, pressing her rings against the fabric.

  "Is that it?" he asked, his voice a low, deep rumble.

  She scowled up at him, putting her hands on her hips. "I'm not sorry for leaving the Doctor's Office, if that's what you're getting at."

  "What about last night?"

  "Oh... I'm sorry about that too," she said, losing some of her defiance. "Leigh asked me to come to Stronghold, and I didn't think about how it would look if I showed up without the collar on and with Michael. Not that I was really with him, which is why I didn't think about it. We all came together. He didn't play with me last night, and he didn't ask me to. Even if he had, I would have never said yes."

  Letting her babble, Patrick could feel his heart lifting up in his chest, the tension leaking out of him. She closed her mouth with a sudden click of her teeth, realizing that she was blathering. The look that she gave him clearly said that it was his turn. He couldn't help but chuckle. Submissive she might be, a pushover she was not.

  Reaching up to brush her hair way from her eyes, he enjoyed the feel of her silky strands against his fingers. His cock stirred. If he had his way, they were going to be doing more than talking tonight. As far as he was concerned, he'd gotten the go ahead from Jake, and if Lexie was here, that meant they could work this shit out. She certainly didn't seem averse to picking up where they'd left off, rather than returning to the friend zone.

  "I'm sorry about how harsh I was with you on Thursday. I was startled, and angry at myself for not maintaining my control, and I reacted badly."

  "Yes you did," Lexie said, giving him a pert look that had him chuckling again.

  "Careful there, Pixie, you're in enough trouble as it is."

  Her eyes widened in surprise, and she shook her head, but he could also see her pupils dilating as her breathing picked up. She might be shaking her head, but she liked the idea of being in trouble and in need of discipline.

  Patrick twirled her hair around his fingers, and she gulped a little as her eyes flicked to his hand and then back up to him. They'd never stood quite this close, with him touching her like this. Her already big eyes got even bigger as she seemed to realize that something had changed, that he wasn't holding back anymore. Good. Because, while he was still in control of himself, the boundary lines had shifted, and she was about to be in for a surprise.

  "If you had come to my office on Thursday, I would have apologized then and there. But maybe it's better this way. I had a chance to talk to Jake this morning."

  Her lips tightened and then smoothed out, as if she wanted to say something and then exerted the effort to stay quiet. No, she still didn't like that he'd felt the need to talk to Jake, but she wasn't going to make a big deal out if it either.

  "I told him that we're going to be dating by the time he gets home. I hope you don't make a liar out of me."

  The look in her eyes softened as they lit up from within, her head tilting towards his hand, body turning towards him a little more. Yeah, she liked that idea. Triumphant satisfaction blazed through him. He didn't know what she had been expecting when she'd shown up at his house tonight, but he knew exactly what he was going to take now that she was here.

  "Okay," she whispered.

  "Good, as long as we're on the same page."

  Her lips parted as he leaned down, his hand cupping her cheek, fingers still tangled in her hair, and he kissed her.

  Chapter 13

  Patrick's lips were soft against hers, gentle, almost coaxing. She couldn't help but move closer to him, almost unbelieving that this was really happening. They were kissing! Not because of a scene or pent-up sexual tension, but because Patrick wanted to kiss her.

  This should have been what their first kiss was like. This gentle but demanding press of lips, one hand on her cheek, the other sliding around her waist to draw her in closer as she opened for him and his tongue delved into her mouth. Lexie made a needy noise in her throat as she kissed him back, sliding her tongue against his, pressing herself against his body.

  The sensation was heady, the fulfillment of a long-held fantasy making the moment both surreal and ecstatic. It wasn't just arousal that exploded through her body, it was excitement, joy, and love. The revelation of hope that she'd held on to for years.

  Patrick wasn’t just kissing her, he was devouring her. Lexie was becoming light-headed as he kissed her so deeply, so possessively, that it was consuming her entire being. His fingers slid around to the back of her neck holding her in place, as if he was afraid she would pull away. No chance of that. She kissed him back just as hungrily, glorying in the moment.

  When he pulled away, she tried to follow, going on her tiptoes and whimpering at the loss. Opening her eyes, she stared imploringly up at him, hoping he wasn’t going to stop now. She might have to kill him if he did. It would be a waste of a seriously great kisser.

  “Boundaries.”

  “What?” She blinked, confused and trying to catch up.

  “What are your boundaries for today?” he asked, his voice rasping. Fingers stroked her back, along her spine, making her shiver as lustful tingles ran under her skin. “Your limits. How far are you willing to go?”

  Oh. Oh.

  Fuck yes.

  “No limits,” she whispered huskily, her throat tightening with excitement and making it almost difficult for her to talk. Yes, yes, yes! “I trust you.”

  Heat and need flared and then his lips were on hers again, but this time he wasn’t just leaning over her, he was lifting her up. Grasping her ass, he pulled her hard against him and Lexie jumped, instinctively, helping him. Her legs wrapped around his hips, the hard ridge of his erection pressing directly against her splayed pussy.

  As excited as she was, she couldn't stop the little tremor of anxiety that went through her as well. She'd been dreaming about this for so long that she couldn't believe it was actually happening. Some part of her was terrified that she'd fallen asleep and was just dreaming. Really, really vividly.

  Patrick's fingers dug into her ass and he started to move, still kissing her, and she had to admire his ability to multitask. Walking slowly but surely, he went down the hall, and Lexie thought her heart was going to pound its way out of her chest when she realized that he was taking her to his bedroom. She felt a bit faint, and not just because he was kissing her so deeply that she could barely breathe.

  Oh my god... Oh my god... Oh my god...

  She felt like she was going to die of excitement, like her heart was going to give out because it was beating so rapidly – and she would never forgive herself if she did.

  When he put her down, he slid her along his body so that she rubbed against his erection. She'd always enjoyed how much taller and stronger he was than her, but now it felt even more so. Patrick loomed over her, his hands on her back, looking calm and put together, while she was fallen apart at the seams. Her lips were swollen from kissing, her lungs weren't getting enough air, and her legs could barely hold her up.

  "Put your hands up in the air."

  She didn't question, she just obeyed, and shivered as he tugged off her shirt. Moving like an automaton, Lexie stood completely submissively as he stripped her. Pants, bra and thong all dropped to his floor, something that he seemed to relish as he scattered her clothing in his bedroom. Which was kind of funny - or it would be if she wasn't so focused on what was happening - because
everything else in his condo was so neat and clean. But apparently he liked her clothes on his floor, go figure.

  Standing in front of him, completely naked, was an entirely different experience in his bedroom. So much more intimate than at Stronghold. She'd never realized how much the other patrons of the club made a kind of buffer, even when they weren't in the room. There was always the noise of the club, filtering through the walls, adding to the atmosphere. Here, there was nothing but her and Patrick and now she was completely naked and vulnerable.

  "Easy, sweetheart," Patrick murmured, sliding his hands over her bare skin, caressing. She trembled even more at his touch, her own hands coming up to press against his chest. "We don't have to do anything if you're not ready."

  Oh fuck no. Lexie shook her head, her hair flying wildly at her vehemence. "NO! I mean, no, I'm ready. I'm just... nervous."

  She licked her lips as his dark eyes glowed with an inner fire, fingers sliding along her spine and making her want to drop to her knees... except that he hadn't told her to. This was Patrick in his element like she'd never seen him before, totally in control and holding nothing back. No wonder her body was jittery with emotions.

  "Well that's easily solved, Pixie. You don't have to worry about doing anything but what I tell you." The smug satisfaction in his voice made her pussy clench. Strange, how any other man, at any other time, would make her want to slap him for saying that, but right now it was the hottest thing she'd ever heard. She practically whimpered she was so turned on. "Get up on the bed and sit with your back against my headboard."

  Pulling away from him sucked, but it excited her to be following his orders... knowing that this was going to be more intimate and more thorough than any scene at Stronghold had been so far. Behind her, she could just hear the rustle of his clothing as he pulled it off. Jumping up onto the bed, she quickly turned and sat down with her back pressed against the headboard. The headboard was an intricate combination of padding and decorative wood paneling; the largest padded section was right in the center of the bed, so that's where she sat, giving her a comfortable seat as she watched Patrick strip.