The Stone Wall

by Beverly Lewis

  Anna listened, feeling all the more uncertain as to what they could depend on from Mammi’s memories . . . and what they could not.

  During most of Anna and her mother’s visit with Wanita and the children in the sitting room, Mammi Eliza sat there snoozing. Anna’s eyes were drawn to her grandmother’s peaceful countenance, and she felt impressed to memorize her dear face. Oh, she loved being with her . . . and with Mamm and Wanita and the children, too. But there was something about Mammi Eliza’s restful state that made Anna thankful for this particular visit.

  “Who wants a strawberry popsicle?” Wanita asked. “I made a batch yesterday.”

  Bethie and Bonnie followed her out to the kitchen, and soon little Rogene wiggled off Mamm’s lap and toddled out there, too.

  Just then, Mammi Eliza’s eyes fluttered open, and seeing Anna there, she sat up a bit, her shoulders rising with a deep breath. “Ach, Anna . . . you’re here,” she whispered.

  Nodding, Anna moved her chair closer. “I’ve sure been missing you, Mammi.” She reached for her hand and patted it.

  “Well now . . .” Mammi looked pleased.

  “I pray for you every day; don’t forget.”

  Mammi’s eyelids fell to half-mast now. “Did ya find the stone wall?” She murmured it so softly that Anna wasn’t sure she’d heard correctly.

  Frowning, Anna turned toward her mother. “What do you make of that?” she whispered. “She’s talking about the wall again.”

  Mamm’s smile was faint as she motioned for Anna to go with her to the front room. “You can’t trust what she says anymore, Anna,” Mamm told her, looking concerned. “She might be hallucinating or coming out of a dream. The doctor says that can happen sometimes.”

  Anna didn’t know what to think. All the same, Mammi’s repeated mentions of a stone wall were hard to ignore.

  “I tend to believe Mammi,” she told her mother quietly. “Honestly, it seems like she’s trying to tell me something important.”

  Her mother paused uneasily, then said, “Just don’t let your imagination run away with you, Anna.” Her Mamm held her gaze, and Anna let it be.

  Before they left, Anna asked her sister if she could run up to the attic and look around.

  “If you’re thinking about the journals you wrote about, I went through Mammi’s blanket chest. There are no journals anywhere to be found, and I searched quite thoroughly,” Wanita said.

  “Well, would you mind if I look?”

  Wanita shrugged. “Not at all,” she said. “Guess it’s possible I overlooked something.”

  “I’ll search carefully,” Anna said, feeling only slightly hopeful.

  Chapter 27

  SUNDAY, JULY 11, 1948

  Eliza waited till she knew Great-aunt Joanna had gone to bed for the night, then crept outside, walking down the dirt lane to sit on the stone steps leading to the springhouse just south of the farmhouse. There, she pondered her situation, going over in her mind the fact that she had not run into Ebenezer Lapp either out on the road or at market for days now. It was odd, really, since for the first few weeks after coming to stay here, she had repeatedly bumped into him. As she stared at the moon, a sliver of a fingernail tonight, she wondered if he might have left the area to help a relative.

  She’d brought her flashlight along, in case she decided to give in to her inclination to walk down the road to the stone wall. The desire to visit it was ever so strong, and sighing, she admitted to herself that what she actually wanted was to see Eb. She missed him. Getting up from the steps, she headed down toward the road, the light from her flashlight bobbing along, leading the way.

  Locating the lone pin oak tree on this side of the stone wall, Eliza took several steps forward until she stood at the very spot where Eb’s parents had supposedly hidden their notes as a courting couple. Eb seemed so sure about it, she thought, her curiosity growing as she spotted the dark gray stone Eb had pointed out. Struggling to slip her fingers beneath the heavy stone and the one below it, she remembered what Eb had said about making it simple to find a letter in the wall. She stared at the large gray stone and pushed hard on it, and, managing to find a slight crevice underneath, she fished around, searching for what, she really did not know.

  To her surprise, she felt something. And when she directed the light from the flashlight toward it, she saw a folded piece of paper with her name on the front.

  “What on earth?” she murmured, pulling it from its hiding place, her pulse racing.

  Ever so curious, she opened the note and began to read.

  Dear Eliza,

  I hope you think to come here looking for a note from me, though I figure the chances are probably low, since we didn’t really talk about doing this. But if you’re reading this, then know I’m very happy how much we think alike.

  As I write this, three weeks have passed since you met me here, and truth be told, I’ve missed seeing you, Eliza. I like spending time with you. But since we really shouldn’t be seen together because of our different backgrounds—if you would even like to see me again, that is—I wondered if you might leave a note here for me, too . . . if you’ve found this one.

  Your friend,

  Eb Lapp

  “He must be ferhoodled,” Eliza whispered, refolding the note and forcing it back into the small crevice. She backed away from the stone wall and leaned against the wide trunk of the tall tree, her heart still beating fast as the moon slid behind a cloud.

  The boundary between us is stronger than any stone wall, she thought as she turned off her flashlight. Encompassed in darkness, she breathed deeply and tried to calm down, letting her eyes become accustomed to the dark.

  She turned to head back to Great-aunt Joanna’s. Eb had taken a risk by declaring that he enjoyed spending time with her. But why had he even suspected she might think to look in the wall for a note that she had no idea he’d write?

  Glad again for her flashlight, Eliza switched it on to cross the dark road. Maybe Eb thinks that if notes worked to get his mother to join the Amish and marry his father, they’ll work with me.

  Eliza tittered at the notion, then pressed her hand over her mouth as she made her way up toward the big back porch. “That’ll never happen,” she whispered as she took a seat in her aunt’s rocking chair, the black Labrador, Grady, wagging his tail nearby, having come out of his resting place.

  Eliza leaned back and stared at the night sky, more conflicted as the moments passed. She remembered the words Eb had written and wondered what had prompted her to look for a note in the very wall where Eb’s father had first hidden notes decades before.

  She stiffened, upset with herself now for even venturing out to look. And continuing to ponder this, it occurred to her that, if she was so dead set against Eb’s note and his apparent fondness for her, then why was she suddenly blinking back tears?

  Chapter 28

  Anna wasn’t surprised to discover that Wanita’s attic was as neat as the rooms in the rest of the house. Going over to the long wooden chest in the far corner, she hoped her sister didn’t mind her coming up here. I need to see for myself about Mammi’s prayer journals, she thought, lifting the lid back from the chest, yearning to find them. “Wouldn’t it be wonderful if they still existed?” she murmured, leaning the open lid against the slanted attic beams.

  One at a time, she removed Mammi’s old linens, embroidered doilies, and blankets no longer needed to bring cheer and warmth to a home. Anna even unfolded some of the larger blankets and quilts, making extra work for herself, but she was determined not to miss finding something that might confirm the existence of the Strasburg stone wall that seemingly fascinated her dear Mammi.

  She found old books, as well as letters from relatives who had passed on, and, encased in a plastic bag, a lovely autumn wreath made with twine and twigs from the woods. Some of the berries had fallen off, but a few remained, as did a soft gold velvet ribbon.

  Admiring it, Anna wondered if it might be something Mammi would lik
e to see again. On the other hand, she didn’t want to confuse her unnecessarily. Not for the world.

  Looking around to make sure she’d refolded and placed everything back as it had been, Anna sighed as she reached for the hinged lid and gradually brought it down. Discouraged, she sat on the lid and looked out the attic dormer window toward the pastureland.

  “So that’s it,” she whispered, leaning her head into her hands and closing her eyes tightly. “I need to let this go.”

  After a time, she rose and tiptoed around the opposite side of the chest.

  Then, seeing what looked like a dusty book peeking out from beneath the old chest, she reached down to pick it up. Thrilled, she brushed off a small diary with a lock and tiny key dangling by a thin yellow ribbon.

  The key fit the minuscule lock easily, and Anna noticed the name and date on the first page: Eliza Hertzler, 1948. Without thinking about invading Mammi’s privacy, Anna turned to the month of June and scanned through the pages, looking for any mention of a stone wall.

  Mammi won’t mind, she thought, still hoping this might be just the thing to confirm her grandmother’s attempts to reveal something about her past.

  Anna read further. The entries were short and rather obscure—a few mentions of her great-aunt Joanna and a black Lab named Grady. Nothing about a beau . . . or a meeting at a stone wall.

  Wanita called up the steps, and Anna let her know that she’d found something. “Bring it down and we’ll have a look-see,” Wanita said as Anna made her way to the steep staircase.

  Anna carried the still dusty diary downstairs and placed it in Wanita’s hands. “I’d love to look through it more thoroughly, if it’s all right,” Anna said.

  Wanita looked quite surprised. “Where did ya find this?”

  Anna told her, hoping Mamm wouldn’t be upset at this discovery, but secretly, Anna was thrilled.

  Early Monday morning, the day after Anna’s return from Mifflinburg, she bounded out of bed before her alarm sounded and hurried to the dresser drawer where she’d placed Mammi’s diary for safekeeping. Grateful for Mamm’s approval to bring the diary back to Strasburg, Anna tenderly turned the pages she’d stayed up last night reading. There were no revelations about any young man, but as Anna read forward now, she noticed a different sort of entry, a page on the righthand side of the diary with a description that caught her attention:

  Look for the tall pin oak tree a few yards from the stone wall. Straight ahead, in line with the tree—the only tree around—is the dark gray stone. Search for the crevice under the large stone, and look for the note underneath.

  “Wow,” Anna whispered. “Mammi wasn’t hallucinating after all. There was a stone wall.”

  She couldn’t help but wonder about the pin oak tree, though, knowing that if it was that tall seventy years ago, it would have long since reached maturity. “Pin oaks don’t live as long as some trees,” she murmured, realizing that even if she could find the wall, the marker for the gray stone couldn’t possibly be in existence now.

  Instead of waiting in the break room between her tours, Anna walked over to the Lancaster Mennonite Historical Society to do some quick research on the historic stone walls of Strasburg. Fortunately, she was able to get the locations of three and was itching to drive to see them after her second tour of the day, this one with a woman and her daughter from Australia who’d requested a three-hour tour. They were interested in seeing an Amish housewares store, the wooden toy shop, and an Amish farm with quilts and crafts and a buggy for photo ops, as well as the Mascot Roller Mills in Ronks.

  As soon as that tour was over, Anna asked Helen, the helpful receptionist at the information center, if there were any tours lined up for her tomorrow.

  “It looks like you could have three, assuming you can fit them all in,” Helen said, showing Anna the log. “One is scheduled for nine o’clock, one for eleven-fifteen—that couple wants to be taken to an authentic Amish restaurant, so I would suggest Dienner’s, if you’re familiar with it. The third tour would begin at two-thirty, which gives you plenty of time to get back here between the second and third.”

  “Sure, I’ll do all three,” Anna said, delighted yet again by how well this job was working out. “Thanks so much.”

  Walking into the break room, she noticed Mart talking to one of the other fellows and waved at them as she went to get some coffee at the counter.

  Evelyn Leaman peeked in at that moment and motioned for Anna. “May I speak with you briefly?”

  Anna nodded and, taking her coffee, followed her to the main office down the hallway. She sat across from Evelyn’s desk, feeling more at ease with her now.

  “You’ll be pleased to know that I’ve received glowing remarks from clients regarding your tours, Anna,” Evelyn said, a pen between her fingers.

  Anna smiled. “I’m glad to hear they enjoyed them.”

  “I wanted to pass along the encouragement.” Evelyn seemed to study her. “Anna, you must surely miss your family in Mifflinburg.”

  Nodding, Anna mentioned having just returned from a weekend visit. “My parents understand why I wanted to spread my wings. And I appreciate that.”

  “Well, we’re certainly delighted to have you on board here.”

  Anna thanked her again, and after the short visit, Anna noticed Mart talking in the hallway with another tour guide, the same young Mennonite woman he often sat with in the break room. Anna kept walking toward the entrance and to her car, feeling a little down, though she wouldn’t let on, just as she hadn’t let on how nervous she’d been for her interview weeks ago.

  Once inside her car, she took out the small notebook from her purse to look up the locations for the stone walls, then opened Google Maps on her phone to enter the first destination. As she backed out of her spot, she saw Mart heading across the parking lot to his car. He raised his hand in a high wave and gave her a big smile.

  She waved back.

  Before returning to Glen and Sadie’s place, Anna drove to the first wall on her list. It was a lovely setting, across the road from pastureland with a pond. She slowed her car, moving along the shoulder and wishing she knew more from Mammi, though that was not possible now. There were many tall black walnut trees—a grove of them—on the north side of this wall. Just as Sadie mentioned, thought Anna. But not a single pin oak.

  Anna drove farther up the road and turned around, then backtracked, creeping along as she scrutinized the wall and the trees again. Next, she drove to a smaller stone wall a few miles away, and later, the last wall, which turned out to be the one running between the wide meadow and Gabe’s uncle’s property at Peaceful Meadows. She was the most familiar with this one, of course, having admired it whenever she was there to volunteer.

  Eventually, Anna returned to the Flauds’ farm and hurried to her room to change clothes from work.

  That evening, after supper, Anna could tell that Sadie seemed blue. “Let’s go for a walk,” she suggested.

  Sadie shook her head. “Ach, I oughta keep workin’.”

  “It might make you feel better if you come,” Anna said while sweeping the kitchen floor.

  “Well, ya know, I have been wanting to go an’ see the tree house again. . . .”

  “And I know the easiest path to take there.” Anna finished sweeping. “It’d be gut for me, too,” she admitted.

  “All right, then.” Sadie dried her hands and untied her white half apron and hung it in the pantry across the room.

  ———

  Being in the dense woods felt refreshing to Sadie as she walked with Anna on the little path that led through the familiar underbrush, though it had been a while since she’d last walked there. “Feels nice in the shade,” Sadie said, making small talk.

  “It’s the middle of summer, so I guess we can’t really complain, jah?” Anna said, smiling.

  Sadie chuckled, glad she’d let Anna convince her to come. After the recent visit with Eva and Molly here at the house, Glen had gone to the phone shan
ty that very evening to contact each of Eva’s sisters and sisters-in-law. Based on what Glen had lined up, Sadie made a chart to keep track of who would be helping Molly every other day. Glen had even asked Sadie why they’d waited so long to do this. But thinking about it now, Sadie didn’t want to spoil her peaceful walk with Anna. Besides, she felt sure that Anna was noodling on something. “You all right?” she finally asked.

  “Oh, it’s just that Mammi Eliza brought up that stone wall once again. It’s supposedly somewhere round here. So I actually drove past three after work today.”

  “So you’re certain she’s remembering a real wall?”

  “It might be a partial memory, but she’s not able to talk about it fully,” Anna said, mentioning the diary entry.

  Sadie whistled her fascination, thinking that if Eliza’s memory was as poor as Eva’s, there wasn’t a whole lot that made sense.

  Anna stopped walking to wipe her forehead with the back of her hand. “How long do pin oaks live, do you know?”

  “Well, a hundred and twenty years or so, compared to white oaks that can live for centuries. Pin oaks put down more shallow roots,” Sadie said.

  “I guessed you might know.”

  “But does it change anything, really?” Sadie asked, the tree house coming into view.

  Anna began walking again, not saying anything, as though contemplating this. “I don’t like to think I might never find the stone wall . . . not when Mammi’s so fixated on it.” She sounded a bit sad. “Mammi supposedly exchanged love letters in a stone wall.”

  Though Sadie was surprised, she felt for her. “I don’t usually pray ’bout such things, but if it’s on your heart . . .”

  Anna nodded. They walked to the tree house, and Anna sat down on the third step, sliding over to make room for Sadie. “One thing’s for sure.” Anna raised her face to the patches of sky visible through the thick canopy above. “I’m at peace here,” she said softly, her hands folded on her lap. “Have you ever felt so calm as when you’re spending time in the woods?”