Twilight Seeker: Daybreaker #1
Page 8
“Who is Jack?” Kensey asked, leaning back against the window frame.
“Jack is the real Ghost.”
Etienne uttered a curse in French, and my brother’s expression hardened. “And he helped you? Why?”
“He’s… I don’t know. He’s pretending—hiding who he is. I can’t figure him out.” Why had he helped me? Why hadn’t he let Caine have his fill so he could deal with his high-value cargo and move on? “Did he say anything to you?” I asked Etienne. “Anything about what happens during the day or Kensey?”
“Just that you were unwell and needed to rest. Nothing else. I swear, ma’am.”
Okay, that was good. Jack was still in the dark—literally. We had to keep it that way. He’d fooled me with his act, but the station had seen through it. And since Ghost wasn’t actually dead and Lilith had only murdered a vampire general, maybe the VG wouldn’t come down on us too hard.
“And you don’t know if they caught Lilith?”
He shook his head. I dared not mention Rafe, not with Kensey watching. He suspected Rafe and I had had more than a passing interest over the years. We hadn’t, but it was best not to mention Rafe at all.
“Can phantoms kill demons?” I asked instead. Etienne would think I was asking for Lilith’s sake.
He looked at Kensey, who shrugged. “Don’t they just take souls?”
Which meant Rafe might be alive but hurting. That couldn’t be my problem right now, not with everything else going on. He’d taken me outside the white line and shouldn’t have. I’d get to the problem of Rafe after I figured out how best to save the high-value cargo.
“What were you doing outside the line?” Kensey asked, cheek flickering. Draped from behind in sunlight, legs crossed at the ankles, arms crossed over his chest, he seemed so solid and real and untouchable. He was my brother and I loved him more than anything in this world, but some things he didn’t need to know.
“I…” If I told him a demon had translocated me out there, he’d ask why, and how was I supposed to tell him an incubus had been trying to keep me safe?
“The VG arrested her on the platform,” Etienne answered neatly for me, either sensing my reticence or knowing it because he’d heard me begging to know if Rafe was alive. “Lots of people were running outside. Miss Aris was helping them.”
Did Etienne know he was lying for me, or did he believe his own words? Either way, I appreciated it. Arguing with Kensey was the last thing I needed.
Bowing my head, I combed my fingers into my hair and locked them there. All that mattered were the kids. The cargo. The plan was the same. Ghost was a cog in the machine, a big one with nasty teeth and perfect camouflage, but so was I. And so was Kensey. We could do this.
“With any luck, the VG will write this off as interspecies vengeance. The ambassador can handle herself.” Looking up, I found the pair watching me. Kensey’s brow was pinched with worry. He’d have worried a lot more if Etienne hadn’t brought me in today. “Thank you, Etienne.”
Etienne’s fluttering smile broadened. “Anytime, ma’am.”
Kensey’s frown eased. “You can call her Lynher during the day, you know. She’s different here.”
I could allow him that, I figured, and nodded. Etienne tucked his flighty smile into his cheek, and I could see why Kensey had fallen for him. He had a good heart too, and maybe he was growing on me—like a rash.
“Are you ready for tonight?” I asked my brother.
Kensey nodded. He was always ready to save lives. Always had a plan. Once the train arrived and I got those kids off, he’d take them into day and keep them safe. He might act like he didn’t have a care, but in many ways, that was his mask. We all wore them.
I sighed, trying to ease the growing weight of responsibility. That carriage was coming, and inside, there might be fifty little lives needing us to save them. Everything else was inconsequential. “I just need to figure out a way to distract Jack before the cargo arrives.” Lilith had been my plan for that, but with her in hiding, her participation looked unlikely. The VG was hunting her, and they’d do just about anything to get her. She hadn’t left the station in years. She’d be inside its walls, but she knew how to hide, and if the station supported her actions, as it appeared to, it would help her. But there was one way to find her.
“Have you eaten?” Kensey asked.
“No.” The venom had all but cleared from my system, leaving me ravenous—a side effect to ensure a vampire’s prey looked after itself for the next feeding. My skin crawled at the thought of Caine’s teeth in my neck and what could have happened. But the station had protected me. Millions of humans hadn’t been as lucky.
“C’mon, both of you,” Kensey urged, his smile infectious. “While you’re here, let’s make the most of it.” He sauntered across the ballroom, leaving Etienne waiting for me.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
I nodded. “I will be.”
Maybe Night was too much for him. I should send him back, but there was no guarantee the station would keep him in a day role. If he left, it would break my brother’s heart. Kensey only had me, like I only had him.
“Don’t think it,” he said, guessing the direction of my thoughts. “I can do this.”
“Etienne, I don’t want you to get hurt, and Jack is… aware of you.”
“I can handle it. I just needed to be here for a little while. Night is… hard, but I’m getting used to it. I can do this, Lynher. I want to be part of this. It’s important.”
It was harder for him. I’d grown up with Gerome at Night, surrounded by Dark Ones. Having the truth of Night thrust upon him after a lifetime of day couldn’t have been easy. “C’mon.” I stood and waved him on. “Kensey makes the best pancakes.”
He smiled, and I realized he likely already knew that.
Chapter 10
Night
The day with Etienne and Kensey went by too quickly. We ate and rested, and Etienne told Kensey all his near screw-ups to my brother’s amusement. Only Kensey could laugh about the dangers I faced every night. Then Kensey told Etienne all my mistakes, and I’d made plenty while under Gerome’s watchful eye. Etienne was too kind to laugh outright, but he chuckled all the same, and maybe I did too.
It hadn’t escaped my notice how Kensey leaned into Etienne when they spoke. Their hands occasionally brushed, and Etienne’s smile warmed the more time they spent together. Would I ever find a love like theirs? It was good, seeing hope and kindness, the important things Kensey and I fought for. On bad nights, it was too easy to forget the good.
Near dusk, I left them to wander the hallways, breathing in the smell of old wood and warm drapes. The station was quiet and comforting in the day, and at dusk, it settled on its old foundations. Running my hands along the paneled walls, I listened to the building sigh. If the walls could talk, what would they say? Most days and nights, the station helped us, but sometimes, like when Lilith had killed the imposter, its help left much to be desired.
I’d tried to find the station’s heart once. I’d listened through Gerome’s office door and heard him speak of it. Insatiably curious, I’d set out to look for this elusive heart. Gerome had later found me in the cellar, digging my fingers into cracks in the walls, looking for secret doors. He’d taken me by the arms, looked me in the eye, and warned me never to go looking for it again. It was the only time I’d feared him.
“Will you help me?” I asked the empty hallway.
Nothing replied.
In my room, I found my tattered dress replaced by a black and red ensemble, complete with black suede pants and lace bodice. I picked up the crushed velvet tailcoat and stroked its fabric. It was gorgeous but heavy, and it was black and red. Vampire colors.
“Really?” Arguing was pointless. If I opened my closet, I’d find similar garments inside, all the same color.
The outfit was a peace offering, a sign of respect, and a good idea. I begrudgingly layered myself up, checked the coat’s many hidden pockets
, and breathed a sigh of relief when I found my key. Part of me had feared Jack might have discovered it while manhandling me to his room.
“You look just like them.” Kensey snorted. He and Etienne waited by the night door at the end of a hallway. Beyond the windows, a sunset set fire to the barrens and a tickle of ice traced down my spine. Tonight was a night for saving lives.
The key weighed heavily in my hand. In a few hours, the train would arrive. The little kids in those carriages didn’t stand a chance without Kensey and me. I caught my brother’s eye and saw the same intense knowing. “I’ll meet you at the top of these stairs at zero five hundred hours,” I told him.
“Zero five hundred.” He gave me a small nod and his classic smile. “I’ll be watching the clock.” When he wrapped his arm around me, pulling me close, I sighed and returned the affection. His lips brushed my forehead. “Gerome would be proud of us.”
He really would have been.
I eased from Kensey’s arms, needing the distance from everything I loved now Night was almost upon us. Kensey took Etienne’s hand, no longer bothering to hide the touch, and wrapped his arm around him. He said something too quiet and personal for me to hear, and when they parted, Etienne’s face was flushed.
Etienne and I ascended the narrow spiral staircase toward night, the weight of my role pushing down with every step. I’d once told Gerome I couldn’t do what he did. That I wasn’t strong enough to host all this. It was too much, too big. He’d told me a secret, that he’d been afraid too. The station had helped him get through each day, until the days had turned into weeks, months, and then years. Then Kensey and I had arrived, and he’d no longer been alone. That had been the worst of it, he’d told us: the loneliness.
I glanced at the mark on my wrist. I was protected. I was doing good. I was here for a reason, and I had a job to do. This was right.
At the reception desk, Etienne approached first, smoothly stepping back into his role as assistant and guide. Even his body language changed, I realized, marginally impressed. I’d make an excellent staff member of him yet.
A pair of VG watched us arrive. They studied my clothes, and from their lack of reaction, I assumed my wearing their colors was satisfactory. They let me pass, and a quick glance at the desk revealed the guest book was back in its place. Etienne went straight to it. I left him to check it over and set about my early evening rounds. All I had to do was avoid Jack and find the ambassador without alerting the VG.
A few keen-eyed Dark Ones observed my passing. Their whispers circled like a draft. After securing the cargo, I’d have to repair my damaged reputation.
Lilith’s room was empty. The place had been turned over, likely by the VG. Lilith wouldn’t return to the room she was listed under in the guest book, but she would be somewhere in the station. The station was vast, and even larger when it wanted to be. I didn’t have hours to search every corner. I had to force her out in the open… or find someone else who could.
My library office greeted me with its usual warmth, wrapping me in familiarity.
I collected a bundle of candles from my desk drawer, kicked back a rug and placed them on the rune markings scorched in a circle in the wooden floorboards.
Rafe had taught me how to summon demons. Summoning was a crude method of communication, like hooking a fish and yanking it from its pool, that resulted in one very pissed off demon. I’d performed it once, and only then because Rafe had told me I was performing a ritual to the gods that would double the protection over my guests. He’d lied. The thing I’d summoned—a monstrous creature full of rage, like a boulder with claws and fangs and eyes like burning coals—had been a guardian for something bigger that Lilith had wanted distracted. As soon as I’d realized they’d lied to me, I’d sent the guardian away by reversing the summoning. I’d refused to speak to Rafe for six months after that, and I never did learn why Lilith had wanted it out of her way.
That misadventure had burned runes into the library floor. I’d tried to scrub them out, but magical markings always scarred.
And now I was using them again.
After placing a bowl in the center of the markings, I lit each candle, scribbled a name on a piece of paper, used a candle’s flame to light the paper, dropped it into the bowl, and stepped out of the circle, muttering the words Rafe had taught me.
“Nocte noctem aperuit suscipe tenebris,” I whispered, hearing Gerome telling me not to dabble in their magic. It wasn’t meant for me, and I knew that, but just this one time…
My fingers twitched at my sides. I wouldn’t have been doing this if there were any other way, but I’d run out of time and options.
What if he didn’t appear?
The runes fizzled, burning from within. Embers simmered at their edges, and with a crackle of sparks and an ear-popping flash, a demon burst into being in front of me.
Raphael.
My treacherous heart leaped to know he was alive but quickly stuttered.
He knelt on one knee, his head down, hair covering his face so that only his horns showed. He wore the same waistcoat and pants I’d left him in, but they were now clean. The last time I’d seen him, I’d tried to haul him onto the platform, scratching us both up. His big wings had flopped about. The bent one was fixed now. Their arches rose above him, twitching as sparks dusted from their trailing edges. Gods, had he always looked so… impressive?
He lifted his head. He didn’t smile, like he always had before. Whether I’d had a knife at his throat or he’d had his tail up my skirts, he’d always smiled. And his eyes… they’d been a dazzling blue and green, but now two glossy black orbs looked through me, seeking something. He blinked, and their color slowly returned.
He was Rafe but also wasn’t. Little things were wrong. He’d always been animated, always moving, gliding from one suggestive glance to another, but now his stillness made him cold.
He straightened and tipped his head, eyeing me as though I were no more interesting than a speck of dust. “What do you want?”
He didn’t even sound like himself. Gone was the playful purr and rumbling tease.
I wanted to ask if he was all right, if he was hurt. I wanted to tell him he was a fool, that this was all his fault, that he should never have taken me outside the white line because this was what happened out there… always. I wanted to thank him for saving me. I wanted to see his smile again. But the flat look in his eyes said none of that mattered.
Swallowing, I remembered my cause. I had a job to do, and whatever I did or didn’t feel for Rafe didn’t matter. “Where is Lilith?”
His brows pinched. “Why would I tell you?”
“She and I have unresolved business.”
His eyes narrowed some more, and without his smile, the look was edged and angry. “Then summon her.”
“I can’t… This circle was all you taught me. Remember? You told me it wasn’t strong…”
He looked down as though just now realizing where he was, and smiled, but the smile was a wicked slash, shallow and sharp. A predator’s smile. His gaze rode me from head to toe. My human instincts squirmed, trying to get away. Tutting, he turned and admired my library, circling his summoning prison. He couldn’t escape the circle because his name had been on that piece of paper. Until the candles burned down or I dismissed him, he’d be between, neither in this realm nor in the demon one.
He drew closer, stopping right next to the invisible line inches from me. Nerves fluttered low in my belly. He seemed taller and bigger than I remembered, or maybe I was smaller now.
His top lip rippled in a silent snarl. “Such an odd little thing you are, trapped inside these walls. A dark butterfly captured in a glass jar. I remember feeling”—he closed his hand into a fist and placed it over his heart—“something for you. But don’t worry yourself, that’s all gone now. I’m struggling to remember why I cared at all. Really, I should have let you die all those years ago, let you toddle off”—he walked his fingers in the air—“into the barrens and
get yourself eaten by some hungry thing. Why, I could have eaten you myself. I hear human babes taste like chicken.”
My heart raced, each word cutting like the flick of a blade. I hadn’t known he’d cared, and that made the loss of his soul harder to bear. I hadn’t ever considered demons could care. I’d barely considered him at all in the years I’d known him. He’d been Rafe, another fixture of the station. But to hear him admit he’d cared in one breath and then to hear him tear it all away in the next?
“This isn’t you,” I said too quietly.
“Isn’t it? Do you think you know me?”
“I do know you.”
“Are you so naïve?” He stood so close the circle’s barrier visibly shimmered between us. “Did you think me your… friend?”
“You’d come to me when you were sad. You never said why, but I could tell, so I let you stay, sprawled in that chair by the fireplace, even though Gerome would probably have bargained with an inferni to get rid of you, had he ever found out.”
“I came to you out of boredom.”
“Fine. The time we read the wizard books together and you laughed at all the wrong details. You wanted to read with me. You got so persistent I had to tell Gerome I was sick so you could finish the series.”
“That was not friendship, dear Lynher. It was grooming.” His smile curved like a blade.
No, he did not get to ruin those times for me, or his former soul-carrying self. His words hurt in ways they shouldn’t, but I couldn’t let him see how he wounded me. I shut it down and hid it behind my mask like always. “Rafe, I just… I can fix this—fix you. I just… I need to get through tonight. All right?”
His smile lingered. “There is nothing wrong with me.” He lifted a hand and tested the barrier. It rippled and sparked.
“Lilith—I need to speak with Lilith. Find her. Tell her I—”
“No, I don’t think I will.”